Wanted You More—Chapter One
"You were singing that song to Finn and only Finn right?" Quinn asked me as I trembled I couldn't possibly tell her the truth. I love Finn I will always love Finn but I will never be in love with him. I fell in love with Quinn when we found out she was pregnant in sophomore year, for some reason when I seen her walls come down and she wasn't the same bitchy Quinn we all knew before. Everyone would argue with me that I could never because of how much I fought for Finn, but the truth is I only fought for him because I knew I couldn't be with the one I wanted to be with Quinn Fabray. She's so perfect to me! I just don't understand I never would say I am a lesbian; I am not attracted to other girls, just Quinn Fabray, my feelings stared off slow in sophomore year. Junior year killed me, when I had to be happy for her to be with Sam and I was with Finn, the summer was easy I never seen her so it didn't break my heart as much. Quickly I snapped out of my daze " hm.. yes of course Quinn I don't know who else I could be singing for?" I reply quickly and walk away.
Later on that day, although I am excited that we won regionals my heart is feeling empty to lie to the girl I love… its heart breaking. I heard my cell phone chime. It's from Quinn. Rachel Berry act cool.
Quinn: Hey, are you okay? You seemed a little off today, is something upsetting you?
Me: Definitely not, I am fine I promise.
Quinn: Well okay don't say I never asked.
Me:
I don't know how I am supposed to finish this year, without her being with Finn it's not making me happy. I need a prayer. My favorite duet I have sung so far has been I feel pretty/unpretty it's an amazing song but I was happier about being able to sing with Quinn who really doesn't get enough credit for her voice.
I hardly doubt I will be able to sleep tonight when I do sleep I dream about her then I wake up crying so yes lately I'm not like myself I just wish she could want me too, I could make her so much happier than anyone else if she just gave me a chance, why Quinn why? And I can't tell anyone because everyone will think I am crazy. I need to sleep. I am going to write her a letter and when I am ready I will give it to her.
Dear Quinn,
I know you would probably never expect me to write you a letter or even talk to you all that much, and I know I am with Finn which hurt you but the truth is I was never happy with him, I don't know how I am supposed to explain this in a way that wont make things incredibly awkward? Fine Quinn, I am in love with you! I have been in love with you since sophomore year I know your probably just gonna laugh at me but I admire how much you grown since then! I mean you went through rough things and came out stronger I admire that about you! I wish you could be happy and with me you would be! Anyways I'm not gonna leave you long note you just needed to know, I understand if you never want to talk to me again.
Sincerely,
Rachel B. Berry
That is it Berry grow some courage and put in her locker you already know what the outcome will be! I thought to myself. The next day at school I had my headphones on listening to my ipod playing Wanted you More by Lady Antebellum.
My heart was open
Exposed and hoping
For you to lay it on the line
But in the end it seemed
There was no room for me
Still I tried, to change your mind.
Well the note is in her locker, my life is done now. And with that I walked into the choir room, I thought I'd be okay until I got home until my phone went off, I looked it's from Quinn.
Quinn : We Need to talk.