Gilbert wasn't afraid of very many things. Sure, he was afraid of Russia, but then again, the only two people that weren't were Feliks and Alfred.

But that wasn't his primary fear, no, it was something a lot more personal. Gilbert's greatest fear was that someone would come and do something terrible to his "little angel". No, not his precious Gilbird. Ludwig.

And thus, our story begins.

"I'm not sure if this is the best idea, amigo. What if Feliciano is home with him? They're together now, remember?" Antonio whispered to Francis, who winked at him.

"Everything will be alright, mon ami. Gilbert will forgive us for this little prank, non? C'est tres bien!"

As a matter of fact, Ludwig was home alone, in his beautiful, always cleaner-than-a-hospital house. He was sitting on the sofa in the living room, a book on his lap, asleep. His three dogs were nearby, each of them also partly asleep, but always wary in case someone tried to take their beloved master away. Then again, who would be stupid enough to try that?

Apparently, two out of the three members of the Bad Friends Trio, that's who. Quietly, on the backside of the house, Francis picked the lock on the back door and let Antonio and himself in. Quietly, they stalked through the house, searching for the blonde young German.

All three dogs perked up their ears at the sound of muffled footsteps. One began to paw at Ludwig's jeans, trying to get him to awaken. The other two began to growl as they saw Francis and Antonio emerge from the darkened hallway. Ludwig sat up, unable to recognize the two people coming from his hallway, seeing as how both Antonio and Francis decided to wear masks like creepers.

Antonio came forward towards Ludwig, who, having no other weapon at hand, threw his book straight at Antonio. He had perfect aim, getting the Spaniard straight in the chest. To further brighten Antonio's plan, all three dogs lunged at him, deciding Francis wasn't as big of a threat since he had made no move towards their master.

As well trained as they were, the dogs were wrong about that fact. Francis came at Ludwig, pulling something out of his pocket as he did; a small can of knockout spray. Clearly, he didn't understand that the person he was messing with was German, and wouldn't go down all that easily.

So when the Frenchie attempted to spray it in Ludwig's face, all he got in response was a punch to the stomach. By this time, Antonio had managed to get back to his feet, and came behind Ludwig, grabbing him around the waist. Swiftly, Francis managed to hit Ludwig's pressure point on his neck .

Ludwig only saw black.

He awoke inside of a small basement area, a storage room. It was dark, but clean. Ludwig was lying on a mat on the floor, and the whole room smelled like…tomatoes?

Gilbert's cell phone began blaring, startling Gilbird into a peeping fit. Stroking Gilbird with one hand, Gilbert answered his phone with the other.

"Guten Morgen."

"Gilbert, Gilbert! C'est ton ami, Francis! Guess what Antonio and I have?"

"What?"

"Ton petit Ludwig!"

There was a moment of absolute silence. Francis and Antonio sat on the other end expectantly.

"Gilbert?"

"…

"You are both going to die."

The line went dead, and Francis visibly paled. Antonio looked at him with panic in his eyes.

"Are you sure this was the best idea?"

Under normal circumstances, it would have been a bit of a flight from New Prussia to Spain, but this was no normal circumstance. Not when there's an enraged Prussian involved.

Somehow, it took Gilbert only five minutes to get there (HOW?), and he was attempting to break down Antonio's front door.

"Mi amigo, please, don't be so angry!" Antonio yelled desperately. "It was just a joke!"

All he got in response was his door falling inwards with a loud crash, and a whack to the head. Stunned a bit, the dark haired young man fell over, as the albino swept past him.

"Where is mein bruder?" Gilbert asked as he lifted Francis off the ground by the front of his shirt.

"S-storage shed!"

Francis knew to answer quickly, seeing as Gilbert had easily defeated both him and Antonio in past wars, and wasn't nearly as angry as he was now.

What he didn't expect was to get thrown across the room, landing right on top of poor Antonio.

Ludwig heard a sound, like the locked door of the shed getting violently ripped off of its hinges, only to see his brother's red eyes.

"Bruder…?"

"WEST!"

Francis stood up, helping Antonio off the floor.

"Damn, that hurt. I just hope-" Antonio was cut off by the sound of a chainsaw.

"-that he's cooled off a bit?"

He and Antonio began to scream themselves shrilly as Gilbert stormed in, cackling.

This is why one should never toy with a certain Prussian's worst fear.