Can't Fight This Feeling
She nodded slightly. "Another lifetime."
Just can't fight
Just can't fight
Just can't fight
Just can't fight this feeling
Silence fell upon the pair. Peter was leant against the sofa, one arm resting on his crutches almost in a protective manner. Perhaps he was subconsciously wishing his arm was laid on the beautiful woman in front of him? He didn't know. Confused didn't cover how he was feeling. Tortured,maybe? That was certainly what his conscience was doing to him. Guilt coursed through his veins so hard he felt as if he might collapse under the pressure.
Carla felt a twinge of guilt in the pit of her stomach but the angelic voice on her shoulder, pleading with her to leave Peter alone, was deafened by the selfish devil on the opposite shoulder who was telling her to listen to her heart. The raven haired factory boss took a deep sigh as a barrage of thoughts whirled around in her head. The speed in which they rushed was enough to make her feel physically sick. She attempted to gather them together, place them into mental 'pros and cons' columns, but failed. Carla could feel Peter's gaze prickling her skin like a heat rash, silently asking her to look at him. She rubbed her bare arms willing the metaphorical burn to go away. It didn't.
No I just can't fight this feeling
We should be lovers
We should be lovers
No I just can't fight this feeling
We should be lovers
We should be lovers
"Why?" The single syllable tumbled out of Carla's mouth before she had the chance to stop it. Her eyes remained on the floor.
"Why what?" Peter looked directly at the woman in front of him, a perplexed look adorning his face. A very handsome face, Carla had previously said to herself. For the first time since their awkward embrace had ended a few minutes ago, Carla's eyes moved from the carpet to the man whom she loved.
"Why can we only be together in another lifetime?" She knew it was a silly question, and what the answer would be but like a child who asks both their mother and father in the hope of being given different answers, she went ahead and asked.
"You know why. I'm married for a start."
"Happily? I don't think so." Carla retaliated.
"What right do you have to comment on the state of my marriage? It's because of you that my marriage has suffered!" Peter shifted uncomfortably on the spot before taking a seat on the sofa.
"I think you'll find that's Nick Tilsley's doing!" Carla responded, raising her voice a little as a wave of anger ripped through her.
"Don't try and shift the blame, Carla. The point is I'm married to Leanne, whether you like it or not and I'm not leaving her. Not now, not ever. Alright?"
Standing in a crowded room
But all I see is you
Like the spotlight follows where you are
Carla was fully aware of Peter's devotion and commitment to his wife but his words still stung. She tried to formulate a reply but the words stuck in her throat and she felt as if she would choke if she spoke. The ordinarily strong woman closed her eyes tight for a moment, forcing a flood of tears to stay put. Even with her eyes shut all she could see was Peter Barlow. Barlow on the brain, she thought to herself with a half smile at the unintended alliteration.
With no response, Peter shifted his body so he was sat on the sofa on an angle, turning to face Carla. Her eyes sealed shut, her lips pursed and her head to the ground Peter noted a sense of vulnerability, something he'd only ever seen in her once she'd been drinking. It was at the moment that Peter realised that Carla's feelings for him ran a lot deeper than he'd ever imagined.
Do you know I never want to leave your side
Desire swallows up my pride
I can't say no
I want you so I've got to see this though
"I'm sorry." He spoke quietly, not wanting to startle her. She jumped a little all the same. A few tears began their journey down her face before they were stopped by a fierce swipe of the back of Carla's hand. She regained her composure, pretending that she'd been standing like that all along, despite both of them knowing otherwise.
"I'm the one who should be apologising." She spoke after a pause. "I come in here, swanning about like royalty, trying to make you leave your wife for me. What kind of person does that?" Carla wasn't one for self pity but she couldn't help herself.
"Hey, don't be like that." He gently patted the empty seat next to him. "Sit down."
Carla did so without another word. She perched awkwardly on the edge of the cushion, as far away from Peter as physically possible without ending up on the floor.
"I don't bite, you know." Peter noticed her reluctance to be near him immediately.
"I know, but I might." Carla responded in all seriousness. Peter smiled.
'Cause I just can't fight this feeling
We should be lovers
We should be lovers
No I just can't fight this feeling
We should be lovers
We should be lovers
No I just can't fight this feeling
My head is spinning
I think it's winning
No I just can't fight this feeling
And it's beating me down
"I know it can't be easy for you, what with us bumping into each other in the street most days,"
"Easy?" Carla interrupted. "It's like a walk in the park. In six-inch heels." Peter couldn't help but smile again. He had to admit that he loved her sarcastic sense of humour.
"Point taken." He replied, a slight smile still present.
"We'd be good together you know." Carla spoke quietly almost in a whisper for a reason unknown to even herself.
She turned to face Peter, looking at him directly. As soon as their eyes locked together, she felt herself falling for him all over again. She could drown in those caring, chocolate-brown eyes for the rest of eternity. Carla snapped her eyes shut, seeing no other way of breaking the virtual bond. She'd got it bad.
"I know."
Falling only took a moment
Your kiss charged my heart
Just a touch could never be enough
"We could make it work if you really wanted to." Carla was on the verge of begging Peter to give them a chance. Her mind conjured up images of a crying toddler clinging hold of its mothers legs as she tried to leave, unable to cope without her. Peter bowed his head a little as if he was thinking the same.
"I must sound like a right desperate old cow." Her face showed an uneasy smile. Her eyes didn't.
"No, of course not." Peter tried to reassure her but they both knew that she did come across that way slightly despite not meaning to.
An uncomfortable quiet settled upon the room. You could practically see the tension in the air, a great deal of it sexual.
I know I'm overthrown and can't be saved
I pray the night time makes me brave
I have to show I want you so
I've got to get to you
"I'd best be getting off." Carla slapped her palms against her thighs, a gesture signalling that she was going to move, and got to her feet.
"Yeah, yeah. I'll, er, see you out." Peter got up, meeting her at the flat door as Carla placed her hand tentatively on the brass handle.
Carla and Peter stood like this – facing each other, eyes locked together in a virtual embrace – for a good half a minute before shattering the deafening silence.
"Thanks for everything, you know. And er, sorry again. See ya." Carla half-smiled once again as she turned her back to Peter to leave before jumping a little as she felt brush her arm. Turning back around, she saw Peter's hand resting gently on her lower arm.
"Don't go."
'Cause I just can't fight this feeling
We should be lovers
We should be lovers
No I just can't fight this feeling
We should be lovers
We should be lovers
Carla's eyes flicked from where his warm hand met her arm to those deep brown eyes of his.
She noted the physical similarities between the two of them such as that mildly-tanned skin tone and the same shade of chocolate coloured eyes. Not to mention the one big factor they had in common. Her brain began to rattle off a list of things they shared and reasons why they should be together. Carla found the column of pros significantly larger than cons.
Peter couldn't concentrate on anything other than the beautiful woman whose eyes he couldn't tear away from. Despite not wanting to feel anything other than platonic for his closest ally, and knowing how wrong the situation was, he couldn't stop himself from feeling things that were far more than platonic about Carla. No amount of willpower was going to stop the butterflies in his stomach from fluttering. The sensation of his warm skin touching hers was a feeling like nothing he'd experienced before; he felt cold prickles shoot down his arms as if he'd received an electric shock, the sort of thing you'd read about in a romantic fiction novel. But this was reality.
No I just can't fight this feeling
My head is spinning
I think it's winning
No I just can't fight this feeling
And it's beating me down
"I don't want to feel like this. I really don't. I'm a married man, I'm happy with my family and I care more about Leanne and Simon than I've ever cared for anyone in my life."
Carla closed her eyes momentarily. She bit her tongue metaphorically to stop herself from questioning Peter's devotion to his wife. She was jolted from her daydream by the feel of Peter's hand carefully stroking her cheek.
"I think I'm falling for you."
Why don't you
Why don't you
Why don't you come for me
Before Carla had a chance to reply, not that she knew how to respond to such a confession, Peter's lips met hers. All of the pent up passion and lust for this man ran through her body, making her feel more alive than she had done since she could remember. Peter's right hand remained entwined with
Carla's left one and as they kissed he ran his thumb over her palm in a circular motion. Touches so feather light they caused Carla to shiver uncontrollably. Peter's free hand toyed with her ebony locks, teasing strands of silky soft hair around his fingers. Meanwhile Carla's free hand rested on the side of Peter's face. The face that she had longed to touch for so long.
Why don't you
Why don't you
Why don't you come for me
Carla's heart sank to her stomach as she felt Peter slowly pull away. She could still feel him on her lips. She closed her eyes and bowed her head waiting to hear the ominous 'I shouldn't have done that' line from the man she loved. A simple sentence that would shatter her already fragile heart into a thousand pieces yet again. Wordlessly, Peter gently lifted up her head using his finger to raise her chin, leaving her with no option but to look at him. To look into those eyes that made her melt.
Carla tried so hard to quash these feelings to make the let down a little easier to handle. She tried to persuade herself that she didn't love Peter at all, it was just a silly teenage-style crush that would pass. He was just a friend, a very good friend she told herself, but nothing more. It was hopeless. She loved Peter Barlow, end of. If only their relationship could ever be as easy as that, she sighed, still awaiting the inevitable rejection.
'Cause I just can't fight this feeling
We should be lovers
We should be lovers
No I just can't fight this feeling
We should be lovers
We should be lovers
"I should have done that." Peter spoke after a short while, causing the mixed up thoughts charging around Carla's mind to grind to an immediate halt.
"I should have done that a long time ago."
No I just can't fight this feeling
My head is spinning
I think it's winning
No I just can't fight this feeling
And it's beating me,
Beating me,
Beating me down