Hi there! ^^ Thankies for wanting to read my ficcy. First of all (and
this is reeeally important) this ficcy takes place several years after Sora
getting his friends and the king back, but has nothing to do with that.
It's just a bunch of weird random happenings. It's seemingly starts out
serious, but gets really messed up afterwards (like Cloud barking like a
seal, Rakifi making out with Genie, and some other stuff). If you have a
really weird sense of humor, you'll probably like it. Anyways, enjoy!
-^___^-
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The anxious brunette paced back and forth in circles through the small cavern, just several feet away from the viscious torrent of the outside storm. Outside, a serpentine flash of lightning snaked it's way to the earth, lighting up the inside of the cave momentarily. A boom of thunder echoed throughout the cavern, causing the teenager to flinch. Storms were reminders of the past, and it frightened him to think of that.
"But it's the past, and memories can't hurt me now," he told himself.
"Sora!" called a familiar voice from behind, startling him.
Turning around, he came face to face with a teenager just a year older than him. His long white hair, now dreanched from the rain flowed just below his shoulders and went along with his pale ghost-like skin. He owned an alluring pair of turquoise eyes, colored like the sea, that shone brightly, despite the darkness of the cave that enveloped them.
"Riku," smiled Sora with delight, then fell into a curious tone, "How'd you know I was here?"
"You always come here during these storms," Riku took a quick glane at the small drawing scribbled on stone in a corner of the cavern wall. Without warning, Riku belched loudly, but Sora pretended to not hear it. "Is it because~"
A sudden clap of thunder interrupted Riku and startled the brunette, making him give out a loud yell. Embarressed, Sora covered his mouth.
"You really haven't changed at all, have you?" Riku joked.
"Hey!" Sora retorted, and slapped Riku.
"Hey!" Riku screamed back.
Suddenly they both stopped and just stared at eachother because the authoress couldn't think of anything to say right now. It's a pretty akward moment. A rush of feet pattered from the entrance of the cave toward them. In an instant, Selphie appeared, followed by Tidus.
"Hey" greeted Riku and Sora.
"Hey," Selphie greeted them.
"Heeey," Tidus slowly looked up and down Selphie, "Baby."
"Ewww!" Selphie made a disgusted face and bitch-slapped (AN: I'm not sure what that means) Tidus, sending him sprawling to the ground. Satisfied, Selphie looked at Riku, then Sora.
"We have something really important to tell you, Sora, so we decided to come and find you," announced Selphie.
"What is it?" Sora asked, eager for an answer.
"Weeell..." Tidus began, standing on his feet again.
Sora didn't notice the cheshire cat-like grin Riku gave the two others.
"Oops I did it again," Selphie began to sing.
"Huh?" Sora was confused.
"We made you believe," continued Tidus.
"Why are you two singing a Britney Spears song?" asked Sora.
The two started dancing like the Backstreet Boys along with Riku.
"Because we're crazy," Selphie, Tidus, and Riku sang together. Then, the three suddenly glared at Sora.
"Uh," Sora said nervously, "What am I supposed to do? D-do you want me to applaud?" Sora began clapping, then stopped.
"Heheheheh," the three all smiled.
All of a sudden there was a bright azure flash and mist covered the cavern. Sora gasped and was frozen with surprise. As the mist gradually vanished, Sora was able to see again. But his friends were no longer there. Instead, were 2 small hideous creatures-one pink and one blue-only 1/3rds the size of Sora. Looming above them was a turquoise man with an ugly butt chin and a flame flickering at the top of his head. Sora knew these characters only too well-Hades, and his two companions Pain and Panic.
"Hey!" shouted Sora, "What are you doing here? And where are my friends?"
"Ah," began Hades, "Well your friends aren't actually here right now. You see..."
Hades put an arm around Sora before he could move away and a hand in front of him. On his hand was a hologram with all three of his friends tied up with chains and they appeared to be somewhere in the Hercules Colliseum.
"They're a bit tied up right now," Hades grinned with glee.
"No!" the blue-eyed boy cried with dismay, "Bring them back!"
"I can't do that right now," admitted Hades, "But I can bring you to them. We'll just have to make a deal, ok kiddo?"
"How can you do that? They're in another world and you can't do that without a gummi ship or a keyblade or something."
"Exactly."
"Well, fine then! What's the deal?"
"I'll show you when we get to the Herc Collisseum."
"Okay, well then~"
Wolverine suddenly came up to Sora and said, "I don't like surprises." The last thing Sora saw before Hades hit him upside the head with a brick was Pain and Panic wearing fishnet stockings and making out.
~*Later*~
The brunette suddenly flickered his eyes open, slowly getting adjusted to the darkness shrouded around him.
"Oh, it was only a dre~" Sora was cut off by the sound of footsteeps from the stone floor creeping up from behind him.
Spinning around, he saw Hades, and with him were Pain and Panic, no longer in fishnets. Sora stood up and examined his surroundings. He was in a large dome-shaped chamber lined with stone pillars, charred from fire on some parts. On each pillar was a golden sun and in the center of each sun was a circle engraved about three inches. On the ceiling was an enormous golden sun which was shifting vibrant shades of blue, silver and white. The light from the circle illuminated only the upper half of the room.
"What is this place!?" demanded Sora, half in wonder, half in anger, as he looked back at Hades.
"Well," Hades answered, "I can't really tell you that right now, but..." With his back turned, a paper appeared in Hades' hand that only he could see. "I could make a deal with you. Huh? Well, kiddo, what dy'a say?"
The brunette looked undecidedly at him, unsure of what to say. Hades spun around, revealing the paper to Sora. "Ooh!" Sora said, "It's one of those deals. Well, I don't...I mean, I've heard that you always try to trick people with your deals."
"Fine then. No deal? No deal. No friends either."
Sora swore that for a second he could see Hades' flame on his head shift a vivid crimson glow. Two silver tears gently rolled down Sora's cheeks, sparkling brightly in the darkness, as he made a final decision.
"Alright," Sora agreed, "It's a deal."
"Perfect!" Hades grinned, "Just sign..." The paper appeared in his hands again. "Here," Hades directed Sora, pointing to a small line at the bottom of the page.
Hades handed Sora a pencil and Sora scribbled his name hastily on the paper.
"You're supposed to sign it in a pen, kiddo," Hades told him, holding the pencil before he could finish writing.
Confused, Sora looked up. "B-but~" Sora stuttered, "You gave me a pencil."
"But nothing," Hades said, handing Sora a silver pen with a knife-like tip on the end, "Now prick your finger with that and write your name in blood."
"But you just said to write it in pen."
"Would you just forget what I said and write it in blood!?"
"Do you have mood swings? It really seems like~"
"SHUTUP!!!"
Sora opened his mouth as if to say something, then shut it. He pricked his finger and inked his name over the one in pencil. Satisfied, Hades snatched the paper from Sora and in a crimson flash it vanished. The brunette waited a minute, then looked up at Hades and waited for a reaction.
"What?" Hades frowned.
"Aren't you going to take me to my friends?" Sora questioned.
"Oh, your friends? Ah, yeah, well see you didn't read the fine print, did you?"
"But that's not fair!" Sora retorted.
"Hey, kiddo, it's not my fault. Don't you know to read before signing?"
"Fine. What's the catch?"
"Simple. I'll just show you the paper and let you read it for yourself."
In another cimson flash, the paper reappeared again, and flew into Sora's open hands. It looked like this:
The Deal
You get to see your friends.
You must wait 1-10 hours before seeing them.
You must defeat 1 boss.
Name: __SORA__
A minute later, the paper disappeared and with a grin, so did Hades.
"Hey!" Sora shouted, running to the spot where Hades had stood just a second ago, "Are you still here?"
The silence answered him. The teenager relaxed, and curiously looked left and right. He sat down and closed his eyes hopelessly. A tear fell silently to the floor, making the smallest echo. Curling up against the wall, he soon fell asleep.
~*Later again*~
A loud on the floor echoed across the chamber, waking the blue-eyed boy up. Rubbing his eyes, he groggily looked down, noticing an azure sparkle coming from a lapis lazuli-like stone, no larger than the size of Sora's palm.
"Huh?" Sora was confused as he reached for the stone out of curiousity, "This wasn't here before."
As he held the stone in his hand, he noticed it was warm as if someone had just been holding it a minute ago. It began radiating the same blue color as the stone on the ceiling. The sun on one of the pillars also began emitting the blue light.
"Oh I see," Sora said thoughtfully, "Maybe if I put this stone inside the sun something will happen (AN:I hope you have some sort of idea as to what's going on).
Sora carefull inserted to stone into the sun and watched intently as it glowed an ever brighter aquamarine aura.
"YAY!" rejoiced Sora, "Pretty lights. ^.^"
An abrupt sound of footsteps crept up from behind Sora, who was so much in a trance with the blue light that he didn't notice the figure moving toward him. "Pretty @.@!" Sora droned on. A hand clasped his shoulder and he spun around, coming face to face with a blindfolded Riku.
"YAAY!" exclaimed Sora, giving the hottie a tight squeeze. "What are you doing here, Riku? I thought I didn't get to see my friends until after a boss was beaten."
"Hey, well guess what?" Riku grinned with a hot smile.
"What?" Sora asked eagerly.
"I'm the boss."
"Ummm...no?" Sora gave Riku another tight squeeze. "I know what's wrong with you," Sora said, "You have a blindfold on, so you don't know who I am. Here, I'll take it off so you can see~" Riku threw Sora to the ground and backed away several feet.
"Hey!" Sora yelled, getting back on his feet, "I was just trying to help."
"You can't take my blindfold off," announced Riku, "Or I'll..." His voice trailed off.
"What's wrong with taking your blindfold off?" asked Sora curiously.
"I don't know," admitted Riku, "But in Deep Dive (AN: the little preview- thingy for KH2) I have a blindfold on. Maybe I'm blind."
"But if you're blind, you still won't be able to see anything anyway, so what's the difference?"
"Good point," admitted Riku.
Sora suddenly lunged at Riku, tore his blindfold off, and ate it. He almost threw it up after seeing Riku's eyes. Instead of the usual deep pools of turquoise that inhabited them, his eyes were now a bright shade of amber-yellow, as if he was possessed by Ansem (which he was).
"Oh," sighed Sora, "I guess that's why you didn't want to take your blindfold off. Golly gee, what a surprise!"
Suddenly Wolverine came out of nowhere and said, "I don't like surprises," then he vanished.
"Hey boys,"announced a voice with a poor attempt at trying to be seductive, which belonged to none other than Ursula as she stepped out of the shadows, "Wanna' have some of this?" She began shaking her chest and slowly advanced toward them.
"AHHH!!!" Sora and Ansem Riku screamed in unison while running away. As they looked back, they found that she was gone.
"I," panted Sora as he sat down, "I'm really freaked out right now. First you, then Wolverine, and just then an octopus-lady acting like a prostitute."
"Well anyways," said Ansem.
"I demand that you let me see my friends right now!" commanded Sora.
"No. Hey, Sora-look at the stone."
"@.@. Pretty lights," said Sora, once again in a trance.
A sudden flash of fire distracted him, turning his attention away from the stone.
"What the~" Sora gasped.
Hades stood before Sora and Ansem Riku.
"Hey kiddo," the immortal said with a grin to Sora, "Here, sign your name in pencil." Hades handed Sora a pencil and piece of paper. "Now sign your name in pen," Hades smirked.
"But you gave me a pencil," Sora corrected.
"But I know that you have one," Hades said with glee.
"Do you know how wrong that sounded?" Sora said as he backed away.
"I kno-I mean, uh, pretend you didn't hear that."
"Oookay."
"...You do realise I'm trying to tell you something, don't you?"
"Uh, no, not really," Sora confessed, taking another step back, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Let me introduce you to my pets. Pain! Panic!"
Pain and Panic stepped out from behind Hades.
"I have to confess my sins," Hades said, looking up at the ceiling, "KABOOM!" Then Hades, Pain and Panic disappeared.
~*One minute later*~
Sora," Ansem Riku's voice echoed throughout the walls of the large room. As Sora looked over at Ansem Riku, he drooled about a gallon or two of saliva before answering.
"What?" asked Sora while he wiped off some saliva from his mouth.
"Fuck you!" Ansem Riku shouted. Then he turned back into the regular Ansem because I'm tired of typing 'Ansem Riku'.
"Did you know that 'fuck' means 'baby seal' in french?" snickered Sora as he stood up and walked out of his puddle of saliva.
Cloud came out of nowhere and started barking like a seal and clapping his hands. Then he exploded.
"WHEEEE!!!" two voices suddenly came from the other side of the chambes. From out of the dark shadows emerged Donald as a half-octopus and Goofy as a half turtle (AN:Like from Atlantica). Then they turned into walruses and flew to the moon and were never seen again.
"Coolies!" Sora said in astonishment. "Let's all go to the movies," he said in an old man's voice.
"Hey, I know!" thought Ansem aloud.
"What?"
"Watch this." Ansem looked up at the ceiling. "Lord almighty, hear me roar!" Ansem suddenly burped so loud that the entire chamber shook.
"Well," Jimmy Neutron said as he abruptly walked into the room, "Time to save the world!" Then he vanished.
Wolverine, yet again, walked into the room and, baring his teeth in ferocity, he roared, "I don't like surprises!"
As Sora suddenly looked to his left, he saw Rafiki and the Genie making out. He blinked once, and they were gone. Sora knew only thing could solve these problems, that only one thing could stop this confusion. So he began taking off all his clothes and put on a brown loin-cloth. Without warning, Tarzan swung from a vine at the top of the ceiling and landed in front of Sora.
"&!^$#*" Tarzan cussed in monkey language.
"Hey, can you hear what he's saying?" questioned Ansem who was now reclining on a fuzzy black seat with a heartless emblem on the back. There was a cup holder on the arm rest which was occupied by a cherry flavored slushie. In front of him was a big-screen t.v and on it he was watching 'Iron Chef'.
"Yep!" nodded Sora.
Tarzan then spontenously combusted. Then the chapter ended.
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Okies that's all! If there was a bunch of grammer or spelling errors, I'm sorry, I didn't have time to look it over for them. I hope you all thought it was really really weird, and I hope you liked it too. If you have time, I'd really like it if you'd review because it took me a veeery long time to type this up. I'll be adding the next chappy sometime in the next week or so, but only if I get reviews *hint hint*. Atonohou! -^___^-
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The anxious brunette paced back and forth in circles through the small cavern, just several feet away from the viscious torrent of the outside storm. Outside, a serpentine flash of lightning snaked it's way to the earth, lighting up the inside of the cave momentarily. A boom of thunder echoed throughout the cavern, causing the teenager to flinch. Storms were reminders of the past, and it frightened him to think of that.
"But it's the past, and memories can't hurt me now," he told himself.
"Sora!" called a familiar voice from behind, startling him.
Turning around, he came face to face with a teenager just a year older than him. His long white hair, now dreanched from the rain flowed just below his shoulders and went along with his pale ghost-like skin. He owned an alluring pair of turquoise eyes, colored like the sea, that shone brightly, despite the darkness of the cave that enveloped them.
"Riku," smiled Sora with delight, then fell into a curious tone, "How'd you know I was here?"
"You always come here during these storms," Riku took a quick glane at the small drawing scribbled on stone in a corner of the cavern wall. Without warning, Riku belched loudly, but Sora pretended to not hear it. "Is it because~"
A sudden clap of thunder interrupted Riku and startled the brunette, making him give out a loud yell. Embarressed, Sora covered his mouth.
"You really haven't changed at all, have you?" Riku joked.
"Hey!" Sora retorted, and slapped Riku.
"Hey!" Riku screamed back.
Suddenly they both stopped and just stared at eachother because the authoress couldn't think of anything to say right now. It's a pretty akward moment. A rush of feet pattered from the entrance of the cave toward them. In an instant, Selphie appeared, followed by Tidus.
"Hey" greeted Riku and Sora.
"Hey," Selphie greeted them.
"Heeey," Tidus slowly looked up and down Selphie, "Baby."
"Ewww!" Selphie made a disgusted face and bitch-slapped (AN: I'm not sure what that means) Tidus, sending him sprawling to the ground. Satisfied, Selphie looked at Riku, then Sora.
"We have something really important to tell you, Sora, so we decided to come and find you," announced Selphie.
"What is it?" Sora asked, eager for an answer.
"Weeell..." Tidus began, standing on his feet again.
Sora didn't notice the cheshire cat-like grin Riku gave the two others.
"Oops I did it again," Selphie began to sing.
"Huh?" Sora was confused.
"We made you believe," continued Tidus.
"Why are you two singing a Britney Spears song?" asked Sora.
The two started dancing like the Backstreet Boys along with Riku.
"Because we're crazy," Selphie, Tidus, and Riku sang together. Then, the three suddenly glared at Sora.
"Uh," Sora said nervously, "What am I supposed to do? D-do you want me to applaud?" Sora began clapping, then stopped.
"Heheheheh," the three all smiled.
All of a sudden there was a bright azure flash and mist covered the cavern. Sora gasped and was frozen with surprise. As the mist gradually vanished, Sora was able to see again. But his friends were no longer there. Instead, were 2 small hideous creatures-one pink and one blue-only 1/3rds the size of Sora. Looming above them was a turquoise man with an ugly butt chin and a flame flickering at the top of his head. Sora knew these characters only too well-Hades, and his two companions Pain and Panic.
"Hey!" shouted Sora, "What are you doing here? And where are my friends?"
"Ah," began Hades, "Well your friends aren't actually here right now. You see..."
Hades put an arm around Sora before he could move away and a hand in front of him. On his hand was a hologram with all three of his friends tied up with chains and they appeared to be somewhere in the Hercules Colliseum.
"They're a bit tied up right now," Hades grinned with glee.
"No!" the blue-eyed boy cried with dismay, "Bring them back!"
"I can't do that right now," admitted Hades, "But I can bring you to them. We'll just have to make a deal, ok kiddo?"
"How can you do that? They're in another world and you can't do that without a gummi ship or a keyblade or something."
"Exactly."
"Well, fine then! What's the deal?"
"I'll show you when we get to the Herc Collisseum."
"Okay, well then~"
Wolverine suddenly came up to Sora and said, "I don't like surprises." The last thing Sora saw before Hades hit him upside the head with a brick was Pain and Panic wearing fishnet stockings and making out.
~*Later*~
The brunette suddenly flickered his eyes open, slowly getting adjusted to the darkness shrouded around him.
"Oh, it was only a dre~" Sora was cut off by the sound of footsteeps from the stone floor creeping up from behind him.
Spinning around, he saw Hades, and with him were Pain and Panic, no longer in fishnets. Sora stood up and examined his surroundings. He was in a large dome-shaped chamber lined with stone pillars, charred from fire on some parts. On each pillar was a golden sun and in the center of each sun was a circle engraved about three inches. On the ceiling was an enormous golden sun which was shifting vibrant shades of blue, silver and white. The light from the circle illuminated only the upper half of the room.
"What is this place!?" demanded Sora, half in wonder, half in anger, as he looked back at Hades.
"Well," Hades answered, "I can't really tell you that right now, but..." With his back turned, a paper appeared in Hades' hand that only he could see. "I could make a deal with you. Huh? Well, kiddo, what dy'a say?"
The brunette looked undecidedly at him, unsure of what to say. Hades spun around, revealing the paper to Sora. "Ooh!" Sora said, "It's one of those deals. Well, I don't...I mean, I've heard that you always try to trick people with your deals."
"Fine then. No deal? No deal. No friends either."
Sora swore that for a second he could see Hades' flame on his head shift a vivid crimson glow. Two silver tears gently rolled down Sora's cheeks, sparkling brightly in the darkness, as he made a final decision.
"Alright," Sora agreed, "It's a deal."
"Perfect!" Hades grinned, "Just sign..." The paper appeared in his hands again. "Here," Hades directed Sora, pointing to a small line at the bottom of the page.
Hades handed Sora a pencil and Sora scribbled his name hastily on the paper.
"You're supposed to sign it in a pen, kiddo," Hades told him, holding the pencil before he could finish writing.
Confused, Sora looked up. "B-but~" Sora stuttered, "You gave me a pencil."
"But nothing," Hades said, handing Sora a silver pen with a knife-like tip on the end, "Now prick your finger with that and write your name in blood."
"But you just said to write it in pen."
"Would you just forget what I said and write it in blood!?"
"Do you have mood swings? It really seems like~"
"SHUTUP!!!"
Sora opened his mouth as if to say something, then shut it. He pricked his finger and inked his name over the one in pencil. Satisfied, Hades snatched the paper from Sora and in a crimson flash it vanished. The brunette waited a minute, then looked up at Hades and waited for a reaction.
"What?" Hades frowned.
"Aren't you going to take me to my friends?" Sora questioned.
"Oh, your friends? Ah, yeah, well see you didn't read the fine print, did you?"
"But that's not fair!" Sora retorted.
"Hey, kiddo, it's not my fault. Don't you know to read before signing?"
"Fine. What's the catch?"
"Simple. I'll just show you the paper and let you read it for yourself."
In another cimson flash, the paper reappeared again, and flew into Sora's open hands. It looked like this:
The Deal
You get to see your friends.
You must wait 1-10 hours before seeing them.
You must defeat 1 boss.
Name: __SORA__
A minute later, the paper disappeared and with a grin, so did Hades.
"Hey!" Sora shouted, running to the spot where Hades had stood just a second ago, "Are you still here?"
The silence answered him. The teenager relaxed, and curiously looked left and right. He sat down and closed his eyes hopelessly. A tear fell silently to the floor, making the smallest echo. Curling up against the wall, he soon fell asleep.
~*Later again*~
A loud on the floor echoed across the chamber, waking the blue-eyed boy up. Rubbing his eyes, he groggily looked down, noticing an azure sparkle coming from a lapis lazuli-like stone, no larger than the size of Sora's palm.
"Huh?" Sora was confused as he reached for the stone out of curiousity, "This wasn't here before."
As he held the stone in his hand, he noticed it was warm as if someone had just been holding it a minute ago. It began radiating the same blue color as the stone on the ceiling. The sun on one of the pillars also began emitting the blue light.
"Oh I see," Sora said thoughtfully, "Maybe if I put this stone inside the sun something will happen (AN:I hope you have some sort of idea as to what's going on).
Sora carefull inserted to stone into the sun and watched intently as it glowed an ever brighter aquamarine aura.
"YAY!" rejoiced Sora, "Pretty lights. ^.^"
An abrupt sound of footsteps crept up from behind Sora, who was so much in a trance with the blue light that he didn't notice the figure moving toward him. "Pretty @.@!" Sora droned on. A hand clasped his shoulder and he spun around, coming face to face with a blindfolded Riku.
"YAAY!" exclaimed Sora, giving the hottie a tight squeeze. "What are you doing here, Riku? I thought I didn't get to see my friends until after a boss was beaten."
"Hey, well guess what?" Riku grinned with a hot smile.
"What?" Sora asked eagerly.
"I'm the boss."
"Ummm...no?" Sora gave Riku another tight squeeze. "I know what's wrong with you," Sora said, "You have a blindfold on, so you don't know who I am. Here, I'll take it off so you can see~" Riku threw Sora to the ground and backed away several feet.
"Hey!" Sora yelled, getting back on his feet, "I was just trying to help."
"You can't take my blindfold off," announced Riku, "Or I'll..." His voice trailed off.
"What's wrong with taking your blindfold off?" asked Sora curiously.
"I don't know," admitted Riku, "But in Deep Dive (AN: the little preview- thingy for KH2) I have a blindfold on. Maybe I'm blind."
"But if you're blind, you still won't be able to see anything anyway, so what's the difference?"
"Good point," admitted Riku.
Sora suddenly lunged at Riku, tore his blindfold off, and ate it. He almost threw it up after seeing Riku's eyes. Instead of the usual deep pools of turquoise that inhabited them, his eyes were now a bright shade of amber-yellow, as if he was possessed by Ansem (which he was).
"Oh," sighed Sora, "I guess that's why you didn't want to take your blindfold off. Golly gee, what a surprise!"
Suddenly Wolverine came out of nowhere and said, "I don't like surprises," then he vanished.
"Hey boys,"announced a voice with a poor attempt at trying to be seductive, which belonged to none other than Ursula as she stepped out of the shadows, "Wanna' have some of this?" She began shaking her chest and slowly advanced toward them.
"AHHH!!!" Sora and Ansem Riku screamed in unison while running away. As they looked back, they found that she was gone.
"I," panted Sora as he sat down, "I'm really freaked out right now. First you, then Wolverine, and just then an octopus-lady acting like a prostitute."
"Well anyways," said Ansem.
"I demand that you let me see my friends right now!" commanded Sora.
"No. Hey, Sora-look at the stone."
"@.@. Pretty lights," said Sora, once again in a trance.
A sudden flash of fire distracted him, turning his attention away from the stone.
"What the~" Sora gasped.
Hades stood before Sora and Ansem Riku.
"Hey kiddo," the immortal said with a grin to Sora, "Here, sign your name in pencil." Hades handed Sora a pencil and piece of paper. "Now sign your name in pen," Hades smirked.
"But you gave me a pencil," Sora corrected.
"But I know that you have one," Hades said with glee.
"Do you know how wrong that sounded?" Sora said as he backed away.
"I kno-I mean, uh, pretend you didn't hear that."
"Oookay."
"...You do realise I'm trying to tell you something, don't you?"
"Uh, no, not really," Sora confessed, taking another step back, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Let me introduce you to my pets. Pain! Panic!"
Pain and Panic stepped out from behind Hades.
"I have to confess my sins," Hades said, looking up at the ceiling, "KABOOM!" Then Hades, Pain and Panic disappeared.
~*One minute later*~
Sora," Ansem Riku's voice echoed throughout the walls of the large room. As Sora looked over at Ansem Riku, he drooled about a gallon or two of saliva before answering.
"What?" asked Sora while he wiped off some saliva from his mouth.
"Fuck you!" Ansem Riku shouted. Then he turned back into the regular Ansem because I'm tired of typing 'Ansem Riku'.
"Did you know that 'fuck' means 'baby seal' in french?" snickered Sora as he stood up and walked out of his puddle of saliva.
Cloud came out of nowhere and started barking like a seal and clapping his hands. Then he exploded.
"WHEEEE!!!" two voices suddenly came from the other side of the chambes. From out of the dark shadows emerged Donald as a half-octopus and Goofy as a half turtle (AN:Like from Atlantica). Then they turned into walruses and flew to the moon and were never seen again.
"Coolies!" Sora said in astonishment. "Let's all go to the movies," he said in an old man's voice.
"Hey, I know!" thought Ansem aloud.
"What?"
"Watch this." Ansem looked up at the ceiling. "Lord almighty, hear me roar!" Ansem suddenly burped so loud that the entire chamber shook.
"Well," Jimmy Neutron said as he abruptly walked into the room, "Time to save the world!" Then he vanished.
Wolverine, yet again, walked into the room and, baring his teeth in ferocity, he roared, "I don't like surprises!"
As Sora suddenly looked to his left, he saw Rafiki and the Genie making out. He blinked once, and they were gone. Sora knew only thing could solve these problems, that only one thing could stop this confusion. So he began taking off all his clothes and put on a brown loin-cloth. Without warning, Tarzan swung from a vine at the top of the ceiling and landed in front of Sora.
"&!^$#*" Tarzan cussed in monkey language.
"Hey, can you hear what he's saying?" questioned Ansem who was now reclining on a fuzzy black seat with a heartless emblem on the back. There was a cup holder on the arm rest which was occupied by a cherry flavored slushie. In front of him was a big-screen t.v and on it he was watching 'Iron Chef'.
"Yep!" nodded Sora.
Tarzan then spontenously combusted. Then the chapter ended.
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Okies that's all! If there was a bunch of grammer or spelling errors, I'm sorry, I didn't have time to look it over for them. I hope you all thought it was really really weird, and I hope you liked it too. If you have time, I'd really like it if you'd review because it took me a veeery long time to type this up. I'll be adding the next chappy sometime in the next week or so, but only if I get reviews *hint hint*. Atonohou! -^___^-