Hello :-)

Please, be aware that this is going to be a M-rated fic! Containing blood, drama and crucial misunderstandings, but also a lot of passion and love.

I listened to "Turning page – sleep at last" when writing this fanfic. It does something magic to the reading.

This first chapter contains a compressed summary of the original beginning of Detective Conan, which is important to understand my version of the story.

One more thing: Ran is always smiling and seems so outwardly strong, but we all know that this is just a facade. So while we see the facade in the anime, I've tried to catch her thoughts behind the facades in this story in her POVs.

Ch1, two halves make one whole

They were old friends, Shinichi and Ran, had known each other since childhood. Shinichi always occupied by detective manners if not involved in some soccer game or other, and Ran, caring, loving Ran, sharing her homework with every class mate in need or making dinner for Kogoro - her father, the alcoholic detective who had no clue of simple housekeeping. Her parents had been separated for years and alcohol seemed to dull his pain.

Shinichi had always wanted to be the greatest detective of his time, just like his big idol, Sherlock Holmes, and he was well on his way. He did not realize it, but his trust in his intuition was the thing separating him from all the other detectives – his instinctively knowing what to do and where to look.

Although Shinichi and Ran were busy, their friendship had always been special, had a special connection, though they were not aware of that. They cared for each other, were a good team and they felt no need for being someone else in the other's presence. Ran had a short temper though, keeping Shinichi in line – they didn't pull their punches and their frequent shenanigans and friendly teasing often resulted in Ran getting mad, but it never lasted. She couldn't stay angry with anyone for very long.

As they grew up something slowly changed, and at the age of 17 and 18, that special bond between them had somehow gotten an entirely new dimension. Something they had never experienced before, never even given a thought. They started to look at one another in a different light.

Maturity. Desire. Love.

They began to think of each other as attractive, young adults. Before they even knew it, they fell in love. Unfortunately none of them had the guts to tell the other, so they spent much time trying hard to ignore it.

There, in the heart of Tokyo, was the biggest mystery of the century about to happen, but little did they know...

One day, Shinichi finally manned up and invited Ran on a trip to Tropical Land, like they once used to. And it was then, when everything changed within the blink of an eye – from that moment, nothing would ever be the same. They went on a rollercoaster and enjoyed the speed until suddenly the rollercoaster raced through a tunnel and they heard a loud piercing scream to find out that one of the passengers had been murdered; decapitated! It all happened so quickly. Shinichi instinctively got on the case and left Ran in the chocked crowd as he spotted a suspicious looking person covered in black clothes and ran after him as he left the crime scene. Shinichi hid behind a building as he watched the mysterious man meet a presumable partner - or so he thought... In the next moment he felt a sharp pain from the back of his head and everything went dark as he fell to the ground, half unconscious. He barely noticed when the man in black who had hit him, made him swallow a pill designed for only one purpose – to kill him instantly. The Black Organization, to which the men belonged, was testing a new poison.

Moments later, Shinichi woke up and found himself laying on the ground with a massive headache and covered in much too big clothes. He slowly realized what had happened.

The pill hadn't killed him as it should – instead it had made him shrink into a little boy! It hadn't inflicted his brain though; he still had the memory of an 18 year old teen.

Almost in panic he rushed to his neighbour, professor Agasa, with whom he had a close friendship. The crazy, ingenuous inventor was probably the only one who could help him now. Agasa had a hard time believing the story, but when Shinichi caught him off guard and reasoned where the professor had just been by comparing clues on his clothes, which only a great detective could have figured out, the professor was astounded. Shinichi now wanted him to invent an antidote right away, but they needed to know what was in the pill that had made him shrink in order to do so. They agreed that if the men in black found out that he was still alive, they would come after him to try again and no one, not even Ran, could know of his secret. She would be in danger too if they knew they could use her as a hostage to get easy information.

Shinichi disguised himself with a pair of glasses and made up a new name for the boy he had become; Conan Edogawa, and it was arranged that he should stay with Ran to have access to the detective files of Kogoro, so that he would have a chance to find The Black Organization quickly and steal some of the poison for Agasa to investigate. It was a dangerous decision, but never the less the only possibility if he wanted his old body back.

A few months had passed since that fatal day at Tropical Land without any clue of the black clothed men's hide-out, but suddenly something interesting happened: Conan got sick from the flu and he was given a special Chinese schnapps – it not only cured the flu, it also made Shinichi appear in his own teenage body for a short amount of time! At that time he was with Ran and Kogoro, solving a case as Conan. Unfortunately the effect only lasted until he successfully solved the case, then he transformed into little Conan again.

-~o0o~-

RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING! A loud ringing sound announced that school time had ended and a storm of students immediately followed, rushing out of the buildings. Ran though stayed in the classroom for a while though, pretending to work on her homework. She couldn't overcome to face her father in this moment. Normally, Shinichi and she would walk home together...

Ran was in two minds. She had no idea what to believe. A million thoughts flew through her head, like tiny particles, which frequently collide with high speed in an explosion of epiphanies and elimination of the small conclusions, she thought she had gotten a hold on already. What on earth was going on?

First Shinichi runs away leaving her alone with no answers, then Conan came into her life and then that day, when he got really sick from the flu and all of a sudden just disappeared although obviously in deep pain... Moments later Shinichi showed up miraculously and snap! – after solving the case he was gone again, just in the moment when she found Conan again – in much too big clothes. Now that she thought about it, Conan really looked a lot like Shinichi, especially without his glasses...

No, it is not possible, Ran tried to convince herself. That's absolutely not possible! ...But what other explanation would do? She sighed.

Shinichi... If you just knew how I miss you then you probably wouldn't have left, she thought to herself, tired of all the thinking. Why don't you visit me once in a while? You can't be that busy... You really can't.

'I've waited hundred years, I'd wait a million more for you...'1 She stiffened when she heard the low sound of the turned on radio in one of the adjacent rooms and felt her throat tighten because of the text. Hot tears began to form in her eyes and blur her sight as she let go of her feelings. NO! She would definitely not wait a hundred years for him! It wasn't fair... If he wanted her as badly as she wanted him, he wouldn't stay away this long. No, he would prioritize differently.

A sudden thought provoked butterflies to twitch in her stomach; now that she thought about it, had he ever shown more than friendly feelings towards her? Had he ever done anything to make her believe that he loved her? Had she made everything up on her own? She had really believed that there was more to their friendship than met the eye, but was it true? Well, actually she had no proof... Her jaw tightened. That could only mean one thing – he still saw her as a friend... Just a friend…

Burning tears poured down her rosy cheeks now that she had let them, and she couldn't hinder her hand in smashing the table with a loud crash in pure frustration.

A sudden voice from behind made her jump and turned the table over accidently. "Ran-chan, are you crying? Why?" The soft male voice asked as she realized to whom it belonged: the new guy in class, what was his name again? With a sleeve she quickly erased the evidences on her cheeks from her outburst of feelings. "I'm not crying", she lied. Of course her red eyes and throaty voice betrayed her.

The young man could not help smiling a little and placed a soothing hand on her shoulder. "It's okay Ran, you don't have to tell me. I just heard a loud hullabaloo and had to check if you were okay".

Ran looked at him again, this time noticing the warmth in his eyes and the kindness of his voice. How often had she not longed to see this worried expression on Shinichi's face? Longed to hear his caring voice... Little did she know that it was fake. He played his game with perfection.

"I'm sorry..." She tried, unable to remember his name. "Nakago2", he answered with a smile. "I'm sorry Nakago, you just tried to be nice to me. I'm just tired I think..." She forced a smile on her face. The next thing he said made her eyes widen and her heart beat rapidly.

"I can understand if you miss him. It's hard to be separated from the one you love".

"S-sorry?" He had caught her off guard and he grinned as he answered: "I've only been here for a couple of days and yet I've heard a lot of rumours about you and that boy who has obviously left you alone for the sake of his own ego. Bastard."

At first Ran could not believe what he just said. Rumours? She felt the blood rush to her cheeks as she asked him a question, she did not know if she really wanted an answer to. "W-what have you been told?"

"Just that this kid left you for some reason - everyone seems to know that you two were close".

She gasped. How embarrassing! The whole school knew! "Well, actually it's complicated..." she started, but cut herself off. Really? Was it really that complicated to find the time once in a while to visit her if he cared enough?

"You're right Nakago. He really is a bastard!" Ran didn't see the rapid flicker of the corners of his mouth and eyebrows that made his face show a feature of victory, and otherwise she would not care – this guy understood her feelings and seemed to want to ease her pain.

"You look like you could use a break – why don't you come with me to the small coffee bar a few streets away? I was heading there anyway", he tempted. Ran didn't think twice and was delighted when they went together.

-~o0o~-

A couple of weeks had passed since that afternoon and Ran was starting to become good friends with this Nakago. He made her smile and forget the pain and anger of missing Shinichi for a little while. He made her existence bearable again. Well, Conan was good company too and she had come to look at him as her little brother, but talking to him was never the same as talking to someone of the same age. What could young Conan probably know about love?

Much more than she thought. Shinichi, trapped in the body of a little boy, knew a whole lot more about love than she could ever imagine, but he could never let her know - she would be in great danger. He surely wasn't blind to her everyday evolving friendship with this new guy and he hated it to his bones. As often as he could he snuck out to spy on them, but he always regretted after hearing their joyful conversations and seeing the slowly returning fervour in Ran's eyes that he had missed seeing for so long. She seemed so happy with him; she smiled and laughed a lot. When did she smile the last time with him as Shinichi? Now that he thought about it, it seemed like he always made her cry... Maybe this is better for her, he thought. Maybe she should be with him. She deserves much better than me if I am only capable of hurting her... The thought made him sick. No matter how hard he tried to convince himself that she might be better off with this new guy, he still felt like she was his Ran, the love of his life. But she would get to choose for herself, he reminded himself. And what if I'm never going to get my old body back? He shivered at the thought. No, he had to find the laboratory of The Black Organization and get the poison for Agasa to indentify in order to produce an antidote – and that fast!

(1) Turning page – sleeping at last
(2) Yup that's right – Nakago from fushigi yuugi! Or at least his spirit

Okay what do you think?

I know it's a little pinky so far, but I promise it will get better ;-) Chapter 2 contains the blood. Or at least some of it...

As for the grammar: English is not my native language, but please comment on my spelling mistakes so I can improve :-)