written for pillarpairweeks on tumblr
18th August XXXX
As you are aware, I have liked Echizen for a while now We have been getting closer over the past few weeks and playing tennis more often. I want to tell him that I like him, but I don't want to lose what we have. Telling him is a do or die moment, something we can't come back from….
"Were you scared I'd hate you forever?" Ryoma asked, the smirk on his face as wide as ever.
Of course, 10 year later it sounded stupid. But 14 year old Tezuka Kunimitsu had been a teenager with his first -and, as it would turn out, only- ever crush and he really hadn't wanted Ryoma to hate him or be awkward around him. He'd treasured their friendship. He still did.
"I was scared of losing you," Tezuka replied, wondering why he'd let Ryoma read his diary in the first place.
It had started with them laughing about how neither of them knew when their anniversary was, which had moved onto wondering when it was. Tezuka had been the one to bring up his diary as a source of the answers. To his surprise Ryoma didn't push to read the -that was why he'd given him permission. It had been cute to see him blinking in surprise.
"You;re so cute," Ryoma said, kissing the tip of Tezuka's nose. "I felt the same though. I didn't know what to do, taking you behind the clubhouse and confessing was too embarrassing."
"It would have been nice," Tezuka replied, squeezing Ryoma. All his teenage fears seemed irrelevant now Ryoma -his husband- was sat in his lap.
"When did we kiss?" Ryoma asked, passing the diary back to Tezuka.
Tezuka flipped through the pages to a week later. It was a very short entry.
Echizen kissed me and told me to call him Ryoma.
"That's it?" Ryoma laughed. "Did I break you or something?"
"I didn't know what else to write," Tezuka admitted.
"You didn't even say if you enjoyed it!"
"I did," Tezuka said, wrapping his other arm around Ryoma's waist and hugging him tight, burying his face in Ryoma's shoulder. Being affectionate with Ryoma had been tough at first, he never knew where to put his hands or what Ryoma would be comfortable with, but it had grown much easier over the years. Especially when it turned out Ryoma enjoyed cuddling as much as he did.
"Do you have a pen? I want to add that in."
Tezuka kissed his shoulder, then leaned over and grabbed a pen off the table.
"Write neatly," he said, handing it over.
"Yes Buchou," Ryoma replied.
It wasn't a very good kiss because we sucked, bit it was very nice at the time. Now I kiss him all the time and I love him and we're a really hot couple
"Is all that necessary?" Tezuka asked, trying to sound stern, but his amusement evident to Ryoma.
"Yes. Do we have sex in this one?"
"No."
"Did you write about it or was it just like our first kiss?"
"It's much the same I'm afraid," Tezuka replied, "I'm not good at writing the intimate details."
Ryoma laughed. "Obviously, maybe I should help you write those bits."
"Would you be able to? I thought you would want to repeat them."
Ryoma hit his shoulder gently and pouted, "I could resist!"
"Could you?"
There were many things Ryoma could resist. Sex with Tezuka was no one of those things. Tezuka was sure it was almost up there with tennis as one of Ryoma's favourite activities.
"Probably not," Ryoma shrugged, "still, we have great sex! You should write about it!"
"The only time I've gone into details is that time."
Ryoma buried his head in his hands. "Don't remind me! That was horrific!"
The sex itself had been pretty good, if rougher than usual and the next morning Tezuka had been very sore and had trouble walking. Their couch had taken one look at them and made Ryoma run laps for an hour for being a 'bad influence!'
"It was a good night," Tezuka assured him.
"If only we hadn't had training the next day," Ryoma muttered.
"It couldn't be helped."
"Is there anything else in this volume?" Ryoma asked.
"Nothing much of interest."
"Thanks for letting me read it."
Tezuka stroked Ryoma's hair. "I trust you."
"Enough to let me read your teenage thoughts," Ryoma smirked, kissing Tezuka's neck. "I love you," he sighed happily, only loud enough for Tezuka to hear.
Tezuka chuckled lightly and Ryoma hummed appreciatively.
"Do you want to do it?" Ryoma asked, "sneak into Seigaku and confess behind the club room?"
"I prefer your method."
"Tennis and kissing you out of the blue?"
"I kissed back."
"Only once you'd restarted," Ryoma snorted.
Tezuka did reply, instead he tilted Ryoma's head up and kissed him.
It was oh so much better than their first kiss and, the next morning, Ryoma got more laps from their coach.