Part 1
The winter was coming fast and misery ran rank in the city.
The poor and dying were rotting in the streets and they were no exception.
"Please, Alfred, don't cry. I miss your smiles too much." Ivan murmured as his thinning fingers touched skin wet with unnecessary tears. A beautiful sunflower- wilted, brown, petals fragile and torn. Struck by a disease that was not even his own. He cursed whatever god there was that brought this upon them. What Creator could be so vile?
"I can't stop crying, 't worry Ivan, when I get enough money I'll get us a doctor. The best doctor money can buy and… I-I can save you. We can do it. Just like all those other times… Don't you dare give up on me! You don't get to give up on me! I'm your hero. I can save this. I can…I can't…" A fresh stream of tears fell and Alfred let out a small wail as if hoping his misfortune could be absolved if he were in enough agony. Ivan shushed his love, his only friend, and brought him closer into a weak hug. His lungs cinched tight and his breathing grew labored just from that one act. Arms crushed him close anyways as carefully as they could. Alfred's face pressed near his heart before retiring to the side, eyes closed with unwanted thoughts. The end at least for him was near. He couldn't deny the light when it came for him. He'd evaded it for so long. Couldn't deny how his bones had become brittle and hollow, lips red with sick-filled blood. If Alfred was only wilted, his stalk was worn to the very ground. The saddest part had to be his senses which had slowly slipped away as his sickness claimed his once strong and lively body. First went his sense of smell. He couldn't enjoy the sweet scents that passed him by. The earthy smell of Alfred's golden-as-sunshine hair when they kissed for the briefest moments. How they slept, his love always insisting on curling up just below his chin where yellow everywhere-hair would come up to tease his big Russian nose. They'd giggle and tease each other for smelling funny. Taste and sounds grew dull,stale, unenjoyable. He didn't want anymore of it anyways. All the sounds he heard were of pain and grief; sadness upon remorse. He could barely remember memories filled with loud raucous laughter, their youth and stupidity.
Alfred, sometimes he did wish they'd never met.
Red-stained lips parted first to let out a horrible cacophony of unexpected coughs. Alfred's blue eyes snapped open, widening in horror as he scrambled to get off of Ivan- scared he was hurting him. He took his hands up in his yellow unclean hair and grabbed it in big handfuls- pulling roughly. He should be in pain! Ivan shouldn't have to suffer alone. He shouldn't have to suffer at all! He wanted to be in pain. Anything. He wished he could take it all away.
Maybe then he wouldn't feel so guilty.
Ivan curled up pitifully, retching and coughing painfully without anything coming out. He heaved again and expelled a thick liquid that consisted of a mixture between clumps of blood, mucus, and stomach acid. A bit of it got onto his coat that was closely related to loosely connected groaned when he finished and slumped back into his corner between the building and road hacking and wheezing.
Alfred watched and kicked himself repeatedly for not being able to do a single thing. He pulled at his once vibrant blonde hair and screeched his madness to the uneven brick streets. The people who passed by occasionally made sure to shield their eyes and ears from such a disturbing scene. The smell of death and the feel of heavy grief in the air was enough to evoke a sense of trepidation in the purest of angels. Alfred would know. It was taking down his snow angel right in front of him. Rusting skin like acid and burning the color out of once cool and unusually gentle lilac eyes. Ivan had stopped his coughing fit with a wheeze and withered into the putrid building wall still gasping like a land-locked fish, dead eyes pointed skywards. The air was chilling to the very marrow of their bones and breathe like cigarette smoke retreated from Ivan's parted lips. Clouded eyes blinked once, still staring into space before closing. He passed out. Fighting spirit extinguished like a candle flame.
"Stay with me….stay with me please. You know I can't do this without you." Alfred whimpered, knowing that Ivan couldn't hear him while unconscious. He kneeled down next to him and brushed his silvery hair. His hair even in sickness looked just like starlight. Maybe duller but still sweet like Moon's sugar.
"What's a hero without his sidekick, right?" There was no humor in his voice. It was a long running joke between them but he couldn't really bring himself to provide a real smile. Dusk was fast approaching and the cobblestone roads and brick streets would soon become bitterly cold in the wake of shadows. But, they just couldn't afford shelter anymore and the town had a strict policy against those who were sick. Wherever Ivan went, he went. If they wouldn't let Ivan stay in a shelter, he would not stay. It's how it had always been and it won't change. An uncut corner of his mind provided him with darker thoughts. If Ivan sprouted the wings he'd been hiding and went to heaven, he'd dig through Hell's bedrock to be reunited them in the afterlife. After death they'd have to be together, god knew it. He prayed every night so that would happen. Prayers sent to gods he didn't believe in; sent regardless by bleeding teeth. Their clouds would have to be right next to each other so they could meet whenever they pleased. He'd probably bargain with the devil too, for good measure. Clip an angel's wings. Spit in the face of demons to go where Ivan would go.
He wasn't exactly clean of sin. A while ago he stole stale bread and had been a pickpocket. He'd become pretty efficient at it. Ivan made him stop after he came 'home' bloody and bruised from a beating from some especially angry bourgeois, just for a few silvers too. At least he never stole from the especially poor. And he healed up quick unlike Ivan who stayed down when kicked.
He- he'd sold his body a few times when things got especially rough. He would never let Ivan know though. Never. They had touched his body with their worn velvet gloves, pulled his hair, broke half of his glasses. He didn't even get the full pay after they'd violated his body. The names had stuck. Filthy dirty whore, diseased faggot, penny-fucking slut. Alfred cringed and shook the words away. Now wasn't the time. There never was any.
Ivan would always wonder why he'd cry before going to sleep if he had the strength to stay awake on those rare nights. When the shame and the dirtiness caught up to him. He was doomed to Hell. Did heaven give mercy to people like him? He certainly hoped so. God knows they needed to stay together.
Ivan shivered in his sleep. The sun had almost set completely by now and the cold came fast on razored wings. The world was turning to ice beneath his hands. Alfred snuggled close to Ivan who seemed to be getting paler but maybe that was a trick of the light. They had to conserve warmth. When Ivan's shaking only worsened Alfred didn't take two seconds to take off his worn, nearly paper thin jacket and drape it over as much of Ivan as he could. The once luxurious smooth leather was dried and cracked with holes in several places. Alfred worried his lip and shivered. To make up for it he took the extra pieces of Ivan's browning scarf and wrapped it around his own neck as tightly as he could before settling down beside him again.
He smiled to himself as He wrapped one of Ivan's arms around him and coddled it. It reminded him of the home he'd always imagined they'd be in one day. With all the newest technologies. If they could, they'd help the less fortunate. People like them now. He wouldn't mistreat anyone. He'd redeem himself day by day and they'd always be happy, Ivan and him. Enraptured by these warm thoughts, Alfred lulled himself to sleep.
A/N: I hope I made someone cry. I am please by reviews. Favorite/and/or/follow if you like'd it! I hope I can get the one of next few parts in by next week. I work on this when I'm sad. The original can be found on my tumblr in my profile.