The Consequences of Spinning

by Feather Ice

All Tsuna wanted was a nice, normal life with his friends, family, and insane mafia hitmen. However, whenever Gokudera gets involved, that life has a tendency to spin right off its axis. Much to Tsuna's chagrin.

A/N: Another pairing I'm fond of from Reborn! (and much undervalued, I'd say). It is meant to be multi-chaptered, but if any of you are aware of my updating capabilities it's... Well, it makes a really good oneshot. It's meant to be amusing. I enjoyed writing it, have a bit of the second chapter written (there are meant to be three). Keep nagging me about it, and I might actually get it finished before the next decade. I chose to use the Japanese honorifics for my Reborn fics, which I hope isn't too distracting. They seemed pertinent here. Anyway, it contains BL and, shockingly enough, a striking deficit of swear words.

The Consequences of Spinning

Chapter One: Confessions

In which Tsuna gets weird ideas put in his head and loses the ability to think coherently.

It had all started with Gokudera-kun inviting him to go over to his house.

Gokudera-kun had invited Tsuna over to watch TV. Not that Tsuna didn't have a perfectly functional TV in his own home, but Gokudera-kun had apparently just gotten his very first Japanese television set and was, to say the least, very excited about that. He spent about ten minutes describing his new television's many screen, DVD, and channel capabilities without pausing for breath, two minutes explaining how and why Italian television was better, one babbling cheerfully about artistic use of colors, and then asked in terribly old-fashioned and formal Japanese if Tsuna wouldn't perhaps do him the honor of visiting his home to gaze upon his unworthy television set. One look at Gokudera-kun and it was instantly apparent that he really, really wanted Tsuna to come. Tsuna had wanted to see where Gokudera-kun was living anyway, since to his knowledge Gokudera-kun and Bianch-san had popped out of mafia-filled Italian air and Bianchi-san was currently freeloading as another lovely addition to the Sawada household.

So Tsuna agreed and Gokudera-kun very briefly lost the ability to speak, apparently overwhelmed with the prospect of THE JYUUDAIME visiting HIS HOUSE to WATCH TELEVISION and generally HANG OUT. In a very mafia-like fashion, of course.

So Tsuna showed up on Saturday morning, a housewarming gift of his mom's cookies in hand, and been slightly disturbed to find himself standing in front of the most expensive apartment complex within five miles of the school. He half expected a maid to answer the door and everything, but instead it was Gokudera-kun who enthusiastically ushered Tsuna into a spacious, immaculately cleaned apartment. And when he said spacious, he meant spacious. Gokudera-kun's home was a rather lonely place, no matter how much the rent was. There was hardly any furniture, no decorations at all, and the original color scheme seemed to consist entirely of the tasteful coloring of the walls and floor and muted tones of gray and black. What little furniture was present was lividly bright and seemed terribly out of place as though Gokudera-kun had perhaps realized the night before that people generally owned more than a microwave, a roll-up futon, and the materials to make a never-ending supply of dynamite.

The end result was reminiscent of a pillow factory exploding and leaving mismatched cushions and rugs everywhere. Several of which were floral print. There was no way in hell Gokudera-kun made that purchase without liberal helpings of panic being involved.

"You live here, huh?" Tsuna remarked, surprised that the fact that Gokudera-kun's home was so empty inside was more striking than the lavish apartment itself.

"Yes," Gokudera-kun answered happily, overlooking any pity in his boss's voice. "It has six different exits, you know!"

Tsuna gave Gokudera-kun a very strange look. "Why do you need six?" He asked, and Gokudera-kun laughed heartily.

"Escape routes, obviously," he declared, and nudged Tsuna further inside the apartment before his boss could muster up the courage to run before he found out why the many exits were necessary. Tsuna steeled his courage to give Gokudera-kun the housewarming gift, Gokudera-kun accepted it as though it was the meaning of life itself, and the two of them sat on Gokudera-kun's sofa in front of which hung not the enormous, wide-screen contraption Tsuna had expected, but a slightly old fashioned model with a miscellaneous dent in its side. Tsuna tried not to think about it, and Gokudera-kun babbled away with a huge smile on his face—how Gokudera-kun's face wasn't sore from all that smiling was a mystery to Tsuna—about the various functions of his new television set. It was pretty much your average television set, but Gokudera-kun was so incredibly proud of it that even Tsuna was getting caught up in the excitement and marveling over the slightly-better- than-average sound quality and the way the character 'shin' kept flashing in one corner of the screen, sending, the two of them decided, messages from creatures from outer space.

"Isn't it cool?" Gokudera-kun shouted, his volume probably disturbing the neighbors as he gestured grandly at the television set, which was now playing some monster movie DVD that Tsuna had never seen. "As soon as I witnessed its power for myself, I knew that I had to show them to you, Jyuudaime! Ah!" He elbowed Tsuna lightly, very lightly, so lightly that Tsuna barely got bruised from the contact. "She's going to get eaten, and in such high quality!"

Tsuna leaned forward, shoulder bumping Gokudera-kun's as his friend did the same. "Look! The 'shin is—back…?"

It now occurred to Tsuna as he glanced over at Gokudera-kun, who was still paying rapt attention to the television set, that this was a very unusual situation. In the past half an hour no one had tried to kill anyone, no one had produced anything potentially deadly, and no one had made undue mention of the mafia. Gokudera-kun himself had said the word 'Jyuudaime' only twelve times in as many minutes, which was probably a personal best for him. For most people that was normal, but for Tsuna it was the equivalent of Hibari-san deciding to become a kind and gentle used car salesman.

Not only that, but Gokudera-kun and Tsuna were sort of sprawled against each other, which never happened. It wasn't like Gokudera-kun never touched the great and holy Jyuudaime or that Tsuna was so scared of Gokudera-kun that he was constantly maintaining a certain self-preservation distance, but they always kept to their respective personal space bubbles. Right now, those bubbles weren't even recognizable. Tsuna was sort of leaning on Gokudera-kun, who was shaking his shoulder as he exaggerated yet another virtue of the television. Tsuna was close enough to Gokudera-kun that he could feel how warm he was and tell that he smelled like roasted chicken. It was like they were normal friends, not a young Mafioso and his unwilling boss.

And as long as Tsuna wasn't over-thinking it, it was also kind of… nice.

Tsuna figured that Gokudera-kun had gotten so wrapped up in the TV that he'd forgotten to maintain the great and holy Jyuudaime bubble, and anticipated a slew of devastated apologies the minute Gokudera-kun recognized his breach of propriety. Figuring it was better to get that explosion out of the way, Tsuna sighed and mumbled, "Hey, Gokudera-kun?"

Gokudera-kun's head whipped towards Tsuna instantly, and Tsuna let his eyes drop purposefully to Gokudera-kun's hand, which had migrated to rest on Tsuna's arm. "Um?" He added helpfully, and then braced himself for Gokudera-kun to go off.

Instead of whipping away, the feather-light contact on his arm actually solidified, squeezing his arm for a minute. Somehow, in spite of the fact that this was Gokudera-kun, the gesture wasn't actually that threatening. "Yes, Jyuudaime?" Asked Gokudera-kun, smile staying determinedly in place even if his voice sounded a little uncertain. "Is something the matter?"

Tsuna found himself smiling when he realized that Gokudera-kun was actually aware of the fact that he was treating Tsuna like a normal human being and had no intention to stop. "…No, never mind," he said sheepishly. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" Gokudera-kun questioned, proving that he was indeed still Gokudera-kun and not some strange Gokudera-kun clone. "Is this movie uninteresting to you? Are you in need of refreshment? Perhaps this activity is not to your liking? I will find suitable entertainment for the Jyuudaime at once—"

Ah yes, only Gokudera-kun could jump to that many conclusions at once.

"I'm really fine!" Tsuna promised, pulling Gokudera-kun back down into his seat as Gokudera-kun had been preparing to dash off and do something potentially hazardous.

"Please don't hold back on my account! If the Jyuudaime is bored—"

"I'm fine," Tsuna repeated, stressing the syllables in hopes that perhaps they might progress past Gokudera-kun's admittedly thick skull. "I'm completely fine. I'm having fun, Gokudera-kun, I swear!" Gokudera-kun looked unconvinced, and Tsuna added sincerely, "It's peaceful, and I'm enjoying that."

Tsuna figured he was in the green zone again when Gokudera-kun finally cracked a bashful smile. "I was hoping the Jyuudaime could rest a bit," he admitted, allowing himself to be guided back into his seat. "You've been working very hard and you certainly can't rest with those idiots," Gokudera-kun scowled at the thought, "who feel that it is appropriate to invade the Jyuudaime's home and carry on in a constant uproar…" Gokudera-kun looked as though he would have liked to start plotting over the best way to kill Lambo, but instead he grinned at Tsuna again. "If the Jyuudaime can relax here, that was what I intended…"

"Gokudera-kun…" Tsuna stared at his friend, both touched and wondering if maybe Gokudera-kun was ill because he was acting so strangely. He felt a little strange looking at Gokudera-kun, insides wobbling around indecisively. He ultimately decided to laugh it off, because that was simplest. "But I thought the mafia never rested!"

"The Jyuudaime is absolutely right!" Gokudera-kun affirmed quickly, clasping Tsuna's hand in his own. "It is the mafia duty to be ever-vigilant! But the Jyuudaime is already far superior to such commonplace mafia and therefore he may, when he is tired, enjoy some well-deserved respite… And of course, I, the Jyuudaime's right hand man, will see that everything continues to run smoothly while you rest!"

Tsuna stared at Gokudera-kun's bright, hopeful face, and then glanced down at his hand, still encased in the warmth of Gokudera-kun's own. Somewhere in the background, the television languished, forgotten. "But you're here with me, Gokudera-kun," Tsuna pointed out, which he thought was a valid point. Not that he wasn't happy—which was weird. Why was he so happy?—but as long as Gokudera-kun was with him, Tsuna didn't see how he could keep things running smoothly. Whatever things those were. And that wasn't even considering the fact that Gokudera-kun and anything Tsuna might call 'running smoothly' were pretty much mutually exclusive concepts.

"Ah, so I am…" Gokudera-kun shifted in his seat, seeming suddenly uncomfortable. Tsuna stared back, mystified, as Gokudera-kun slowly flushed red, hands heating up. "You see… Jyuudaime, I… That is, I was hoping… that you… That you would consider…"

Gokudera-kun met Tsuna's gaze again, seeming to will Tsuna to understand his garbled, stammered message. Tsuna stared back, hypnotized, and growing more and more aware of the fact that Gokudera-kun's hand were sweating. And increasingly uncomfortable about that. "Consider?" Tsuna prompted, insides flopping around like beached fish again. "Consider what?"

"I…" Again Gokudera-kun's voice failed him and he just looked into Tsuna's eyes. Tsuna wondered what he was looking for there so intently. Something about the situation seemed off now. If he wasn't sure it would hurt Gokudera-kun's feelings he would have liked very much to free his hand and go home. Being stared at like this was making him increasingly nervous. It didn't help that the entire time Gokudera-kun's head seemed in danger of an explosion with all the blood that had rushed to it, and the girl on the TV was screaming horribly for some reason or another. Tsuna felt like he was in the middle of some very strange dream.

"…Jyuudaime…"

Gokudera-kun abruptly released his hand and Tsuna drew it back gratefully. Gokudera-kun abruptly glared at the television for a moment, looking pissed off. Tsuna braced himself to get punched or yelled at for having finally broken Gokudera-kun's limitless patience with him, but instead after a moment of very awkward silence punctuated by the televised heroine's shrieks as swamp monsters tore her arm off, Gokudera-kun whirled around and beamed at Tsuna again. "...Please don't concern yourself, Jyuudaime! I was simply wondering whether you might consider visiting again sometime?"

Tsuna frowned.

Tsuna then blinked at Gokudera-kun, feeling like that hadn't been what he wanted to say at all. But now Gokudera-kun's face was unreadable, and Tsuna finally shrugged, laughing uneasily. "Sure," he said, and didn't fail to notice that Gokudera-kun had discreetly rearranged himself so that there were now several inches of space between them.

Tsuna felt a strange mixture of disappointment and relief. Gokudera-kun was really scary, after all.

"Gokudera-kun was acting so weird today," Tsuna complained to Reborn as he got ready for bed, drawing covers around himself. "I wonder if he was feeling well."

"Weird?" Reborn repeated, and then snickered to himself, suddenly proclaiming, "No Good Tsuna!"

"Hey," Tsuna growled, blushing with embarrassment. "I didn't do anything!"

"If you really think that, then you're no good at all," Reborn decided, ignoring Tsuna's bewildered expression and spluttered inquiries. "A Mafioso must always be able to understand his family so he can utilize them properly."

"You don't use human beings!" Tsuna grumbled loudly. "OK? Reborn!"

Reborn was, of course, already asleep. Tsuna rolled the covers over his head, still grumbling about unreasonable Arcobalenco hit men, and waited to fall asleep. Ten minutes later he discovered that sleep just wouldn't come and sat up, staring into the dark in puzzlement.

"What did he mean?" Tsuna wondered aloud. "I don't… understand Gokudera-kun? …What? Why not?"

And that was the beginning.

Things got out of hand quickly.

"Mom?" Tsuna asked at breakfast, while Lambo and Reborn squabbled over his stolen breakfast. "What do you think of Gokudera-kun?"

"Hm…?" His mother was already in the midst of cooking another breakfast, well-aware that Tsuna rarely got it on the first try. There was something really depressing about that. "He's a very nice boy, that Gokudera-kun. And so handsome!" She giggled while Tsuna sighed, tugging listlessly at his, by comparison, dull brown hair and wishing that he was not constantly surrounded by people who made him look even more average than he actually was. "Why do you ask?"

"I was just wondering…" Tsuna paused, trying and failing to think of a way to phrase his question that would not embarrass him horribly. "If… If you think I understand Gokudera-kun."

From behind the omelet he had just won, and the skid mark Lambo had made in his airborne departure from Reborn's personal space, Reborn smiled deviously.

Tsuna's mother giggled while Tsuna slowly sank under the table, thoroughly regretting having asked anything. "I think it's alright if you don't understand," she said, having laughed to her satisfaction. "I don't think Gokudera-kun minds if you don't."

Which was as good as telling Tsuna that he didn't understand Gokudera-kun at all.

What had previously been a relatively small obsession, as far as obsessions went, began to take control. This was all a part of Reborn's plan, of course. Tsuna was unaware of this fact. If he hadn't been, he probably wouldn't have pursued the matter any further. As it was, though, he found himself asking Yamamoto-kun on the way to school, "Do I understand Gokudera-kun?"

Although he was not visible, somewhere Reborn was there, laughing at him.

Yamamoto-kun laughed at Tsuna too, which was really doing wonders for the Vongola boss's ego. When Yamamoto-kun seemed to be able to speak normally again he smiled, shrugged, and said firmly, "Nope!"

Tsuna gaped.

"But… but why not?" He demanded, shoulders sagging. "It's not like I don't pay attention…" His eyes watered treacherously as he looked up at Yamamoto-kun again. "Am I really just No Good Tsuna?"

Yamamoto-kun laughed again, slapping Tsuna on the back. "Hey, it's nothing like that," he said brightly. "He's pretty unusual, so I guess it would be easy to miss!" Tsuna looked up at Yamamoto-kun inquisitively and Yamamoto-kun grinned an unusually wicked smile. "He's kind of got a thing for you, Tsuna!"

A… thing?

Tsuna stared back at Yamamoto-kun, not getting it at all. His mind cycled through various scenarios of Gokudera-kun having a gift he wanted to give him, or a secret he was keeping, or… or pretty much anything but what Tsuna's mind was starting to think as it caught on and HOW IN THE WORLD COULD YAMAMOTO-KUN EVEN THINK THAT? Gokudera-kun wasn't… He didn't… It wasn't like that... That was impossible! Gokudera-kun did not have that sort of a 'thing' for Tsuna!

"Hey! Jyuudaime! Baseball nut!" Yamamoto-kun spun around to wish the approaching hit man good morning and Tsuna turned automatically. Gokudera-kun was jogging up like always, alternating between glaring at Yamamoto-kun and beaming at Tsuna. "Morning!" He called, shoving his hands into his pockets, like every other morning when the sun rose and Tsuna was in the right dimension. Suddenly Tsuna couldn't take it at all. His face was on fire.

"Sorry!" He shrieked, and then took off for the school building as fast as his legs could carry him. He could hear Yamamoto-kun and Gokudera-kun voicing their surprise in the background, shouting at him to wait up, but he didn't stop. He just couldn't. He was going to pass out if he kept looking at Gokudera-kun from the sheer agony of all the thoughts going through his brain. His brain was not meant to house such thoughts. It was going to explode, and he was going to explode with it. As it was, he didn't even realize he was going to ditch class until he was safely hidden in the bathroom, listening to his heart hammering and wondering what the hell was wrong with him. However, he didn't think any force in the world was strong enough to make him go back outside and face Gokudera-kun and Yamamoto-kun.

He briefly considered Reborn with a gun, Enzo with water, and Haru-chan with a marriage certificate.

Nope. He was staying put.

He stayed in the bathroom even after the bell rang, splashing cold water on his face until it returned to a normal temperature and he felt a little more human. As fate would have it, the moment he stepped out of the bathroom, he found himself face to face with the one person he wanted to see perhaps even less than Yamamoto-kun and Gokudera-kun. Tsuna forgot how to breathe.

"Tsuna-kun?" Kyoko-chan smiled up at him. "Ah! So you were here! I thought I saw you this morning!"
Kyoko-chan was as cute as ever this morning! Her hair shined and… and… Tsuna felt like crying and wasn't even sure why. Perhaps it was Kyoko-chan's healing nature. He shoved those thoughts aside when he noticed that Kyoko-chan had an armful of papers in hand that seemed a little too heavy for her. "Here, let me help," Tsuna offered reflexively, scooping roughly half of the papers into his own arms and returning the grateful smile she sent his way. Ah, just being in Kyoko-chan's presence was already setting his mind at ease. She really was wonderful. Perfect. A goddess…

"Thank you, Tsuna-kun," she said as they started off down the hall. "You're such a good friend!" That little nail dug into Tsuna's heart, but he bore with it because at least this way he was able to spend time with Kyoko-chan. He laughed a little bit, following her blindly. "Why weren't you in homeroom today?" Kyoko-chan asked. "You aren't sick, are you?"

"I'm fine now," Tsuna said awkwardly, not really sure how to explain his existential crisis in words that wouldn't make him sound like a little girl. "It was… I was just…" He shuffled after the girl, chewing his lip now. "OK, what do you think of Gokudera-kun?"

"Gokudera-kun?" Kyoko-chan echoed adorably. "Oh… I think he's a good person, probably. He's a little scary, but he's always there for you and Onii-chan. And he's always so nice to you, Tsuna-kun! He really seems to like you!" Kyoko-chan winked at Tsuna, who was momentarily blinded by her beauty, and snapped out of it in time to come crashing down with the words, "It's like he has a crush on you! It's so cute!"

The love of Tsuna's life had just said that the possibility of Tsuna having romantic relations with another man was cute.

…This day could not possibly get any worse.

But by the time Tsuna was in fourth period he was feeling a little less suicidal. His mother still believed that Reborn and his friends were normal people, after all. And Yamamoto-kun thought that the life or death situations they regularly plunged into were some sort of elaborate and incredibly unlikely game. Their opinions definitely couldn't be relied upon. As for Kyoko-chan… Well, she must have misconstrued something. One or two people were bound to misconstrue every relationship. It wasn't that unusual. And Gokudera-kun was awfully nice to Tsuna. He could see how she might think that. Even if it was completely and totally N-O-T not at all true.

Reborn read Tsuna's mind and contemplated shooting him just for being stupid.

The obsession had carved a new path for itself. No longer did Tsuna want to know if he understood Gokudera-kun; now he wanted to prove that he already did understand his friend. Specifically, he wanted to prove that the alarming number of people who seemed determined to slander Gokudera-kun as having a crush on Tsuna were dead wrong. Gokudera-kun was a nice, normal, totally insane mafia hitman. He was Tsuna's friend. There was nothing weird about it!

"Ah, Gokudera-kun?" Ryohei-san, after having overcome his initial burst of enthusiasm due to Tsuna's appearance at boxing club. Tsuna had spent the past three or four minutes trying very hard to explain and repeatedly dodging Ryohei's punches because he didn't want to die. "Ahahaha! Yes, your friend, Gokudera-kun! Always there to offer you his extreme support! His extreme affection! Be a man, Sawada, and take responsibility!"

Gokudera-kun saw Tsuna stumbling out of the club room, nearly in tears. Having the crap beaten out of you whilst simultaneously listening to your hopes and dreams get crushed tended to suck the life right out of you. Gokudera-kun brightened, not noticing the fact that Tsuna's was a hair's breadth from total insanity. "Hey, Jyuudaime!" He called, waving furiously. "Want to walk home together?"

Tsuna froze at his voice, stared at him with huge eyes, let out a sob, and then turned tail and ran. Gokudera-kun stood where he was left behind, hand slowly sinking back to his side.

"It's not my place to say," Chrome said softly, having bumped into a deeply upset Tsuna outside of the convenience store and decided that he probably needed to talk to someone very badly before he did something he would regret later. "But, ah, Gokudera-san cares for Tsuna-san very much." She stared into his eyes, trying to get the point across. "Very much," she repeated. "Very, veeery much. It would be nice if Tsuna-san could see how much, exactly."

Gokudera-kun trudged home alone, trying not to feel hurt by the fact that the Jyuudaime had run away from him. The Jyuudaime probably just had something important he had to do. Anyway, Gokudera should have checked with him before waiting for him after school, to see if he was free. So basically it was all Gokudera's fault and he really had no reason to feel sorry for himself. Or to snap his head up when he saw the Jyuudaime running towards him and to think that somehow, Tsuna had come back for him.

He also had no reason to be hurt when he barely got out the word "Jyuudaime" before Tsuna ran past him without even looking back.

None at all.

"Gokudera-kun?" Haru-chan seemed thrown for a moment, and then leaned forward until she and Tsuna were almost nose to nose. "He… is a deceiver," she said in a low voice. "Tsuna-sama must not be fooled! Haru loves you best anyway!"

Tsuna sank to the sidewalk in despair, and thus avoided Haru-chan's Super Sneaky Surprise Kiss Attack. Did everyone in the world have the wrong idea about Gokudera-kun? It seemed like every person he knew—except Dino-san, who was in Italy at the moment—had drawn completely untrue conclusions. The more Tsuna thought about it, the stranger he felt. The wobbling had escaped his gut and moved into his entire body, including his brain. Everything wavered indecisively.

Out of the corner of his eye Tsuna thought he saw Gokudera-kun, but he was gone when he turned his head. That was great. Tsuna's obsession had him hallucinating now. Perfect.

He took a very dispirited leave of Haru-chan and trudged home as though the weight of the world was upon him. In its own way, it really felt like it was. It was tough not to rely on Gokudera-kun when he was always there and willing to help. But if Tsuna kept relying on him, what other rumors would be spread? And…

And.

Tsuna swallowed hard, not really wanting to think about it. His hands were actually shaking and he clenched them into fists to stop. He wished everything could just stop. He wished he'd never heard Yamamoto-kun mention his opinion. He wished Reborn hadn't muttered that offhand comment about Tsuna's understanding in the first place. And he really, really wished he could quit thinking about it and all of the things that people said that actually rang true.

"It's you."

Tsuna looked up from where he was standing and struggling for some measure of self-control and blanched instantly. Before him stood Bianchi-san, staring at him dreamily on an empty road… Just the two of them… With no one nearby to stop her if she tried to kill him… again…

Then again, death didn't seem so horrible anymore.

"Bianchi-san," he greeted weakly, and she inclined her head slowly. "I, ah, have to be getting home… Mom will be wondering where I am… She'll worry if I never come home because I—hypothetically—died of food poisoning…"

"Yes," Bianchi-san said solemnly, and made no move to stop Tsuna when he darted past her, bowing and mumbling an apology as towards his general existence. She also, however, made no effort to hide the fact that the minute Tsuna passed her, she turned around and started to stalk after him like a tiger hunts its prey. After ten minutes of walking silently with Bianchi-san gliding slowly after him, Tsuna had mustered up the courage to choke out,

"Are you following me?"

"Yes," Bianchi-san replied, unconcerned with the way that a lot more of Tsuna than just his hands was shaking now. "So, I hear that my younger brother is giving you trouble…"

"Ah," Tsuna choked out. "Yes. I don't really want to talk about it…"

Bianchi-san took a menacing step forward. "Talking is healthy."

Tsuna blanched again. "Um… Well, it's more like I'm causing trouble for him…"

"You cause trouble for many people," Bianchi-san said darkly, and when Tsuna's mouth sealed itself shut out of pure, instinctual fear she simply looked at him. "…Weren't you talking?"

"Yes!" Whimpered Tsuna, not quite ready to give up on life. "Just—people keep thinking that because he tries so hard to protect me that he's in… er…" Here Tsuna's voice dwindled to a whisper. "That he's in… in l-l-l—" Geez, even saying this felt so wrong. "In lo-love with me!"

"Is that all?" Bianchi-san muttered, flicking her hair over one shoulder. It seemed to pulsate with evil energy. Could Bianchi-san poison the air? Oh please, let her not be able to poison the air. "Well, let me tell you something, No Good Tsuna… For you, Hayato can even overcome the shyness he feels around his beloved elder sister…"

Shyness? What shyness? Tsuna thought irritably. He's as terrified of you as I am! As he still held his life as something precious, though, he only meekly protested. "…Gokudera-kun can overcome fea—shyness if he focuses on it. He can do it on his own."

"Ah, but it is when he sees your face, Vongola Jyuudaime, that's when he stands again," Bianchi-san said dismissively, thankfully making no move to kill Tsuna for his insolence. "When he sees you, he does not overcome… He recovers completely." She chuckled softly, the voice sending chills down Tsuna's spine as much as her words. "The power of LOVE… can heal anything."

For a moment Tsuna could think of nothing to say, and when he finally did open his mouth, all that came out was a long, tired sigh. He was exhausted. Why did his life have to be this complicated anyway? "Why is everyone trying to convince me to get together with Gokudera-kun?" He grumbled, not particularly at Bianchi-san, but at the world in general. The older woman shrugged.

"Because, knowing how long Hayato has managed to keep his pet goldfish alive, if you became his, that would be the fastest way to returning to my wonderful life with Reborn-san in Italy," Bianchi-san crooned.

Ah, Bianchi-san. Always with Tsuna's best interests at heart.

Tsuna liked to think he was slightly more durable than a goldfish.

"Maybe I should just put it out of my mind," Tsuna thought aloud, winced, and braced himself for Bianchi-san's inevitable retort about the supreme might of love and the fact that Tsuna was the scum of the earth if he even thought to waste it. He expected poison cooking to get involved. He did not expect a brief silence and then for Bianchi-san to reply in a perfectly reasonable tone of voice,

"Maybe you should." Tsuna turned around slowly, avoiding making any sudden moves, and stared at Bianchi-san. She shrugged at him again, looking no less irritated with Tsuna than the usual. "Hayato is my little brother," she pointed out quietly. "However I may feel about you, I do not wish to see his heart get broken."

Tsuna's head reeled at the thought. In fact, the entire street reeled at the thought, wobbling sickeningly under Tsuna's feet. The nauseous, undulating feeling in his stomach got about ten times worse, and Tsuna was sure that if he looked up, he would see Bianchi-san smirking and enjoying his pain very much. That little comment hurt worse than anything else she could have thrown at him. Part of the pain was just derived from the fact that Tsuna hated seeing one of his best friends get hurt and part of it was just the thought that Tsuna had the power to do it which was… Really, really not good. Or something. Tsuna wasn't thinking clearly anymore.

He was actually getting a little too dizzy to keep standing upright, in fact. He reached out his hands, stumbling in the direction of someone's fence, and crashed into it harder than necessary, feeling the world spinning out from under his feet. He shut his eyes, trying to calm the spinning down, and the first thing he saw was indeed, Bianchi-san's smirking face.

Her smug, pleased smirking face.

Tsuna's mouth went dry.

"W…what did you…?"

A very pissed and very familiar voice cut him off. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO THE JYUUDAIME?" And as they both—meaning Tsuna AND BIANCHI turned, there was indeed Gokudera-kun; yes, leaning against the wall and looking pale as a sheet, but Gokudera-kun. He had one hand pressed into his stomach like he could somehow keep it from exploding, and the other clenched in a fist that was probably supposed to convey a threat, but mostly just conveyed the fact that it was clenched so hard that his knuckles were white and it was pretty amazing that Gokudera-kun was on his feet at all. Tsuna also wasn't sure how he himself was on his feet. At Gokudera-kun's appearance, the world spun around faster and faster, and his body had apparently decided that shaking itself apart from the inside out would be very amusing.

"I haven't done anything to your little friend, Hayato," Bianchi-san declared mildly, giving no outward indication that she noticed the divine miracle that had taken place to inspire Gokudera-kun to retain consciousness. She did throw a meaningful look at Tsuna out of the corner of her eye, glancing back from the steadily greener Gokudera-kun to the person who she seemed to believe had inspired all of this. Tsuna, who had been rooted in place since Gokudera-kun appeared, considered running away again. His body, his mind, every messed up part of him pleaded for him to do it.

"If you hurt the Jyuudaime, I'll never forgive you," Gokudera-kun was warning Bianchi-san with a little less venom and a little more childish petulance.

Tsuna wasn't running.

"Gokudera-kun," Tsuna called, was ignored, and then repeated a little louder. "Gokudera-kun!"

Gokudera-kun spun around, reacting automatically to the sound of Tsuna's voice with a huge smile, immaculate posture, and a loud cry of "Yes! Jyuudaime! What can I do for—ARGH." For a moment Tsuna thought that Bianchi-san had finally gotten to him, but instead of passing out on the street, Gokudera-kun bit his lip, turned away from Tsuna and to his complete and utter shock, actually ran away from him.

The world spun some more.

Gokudera-kun was gone. Tsuna stared at the spot he had just been, mouth hanging open. Bianchi-san flicked her hair.

"Well? Are you going to—?" Tsuna, however, was already racing after Gokudera-kun, not even having heard Bianchi-san speak. Bianchi-san didn't notice. She was too busy swooning over the appearance of her one true love in all of his dark, handsome, one foot tall glory. Reborn watched Tsuna run and made a mental note to force him to run faster in the next round of training because Tsuna really was capable of more than his usual snail's pace, no matter how much he preferred that Reborn think otherwise.

Unaware of Reborn's latest sadistic plans, Tsuna ran. He spun around the corner and found Gokudera-kun leaning against a wall there, apparently trying to listen in on him and Bianchi-san. Tsuna frowned.

"Hey, Gokudera—" The minute the words were out of his mouth again, though, Gokudera-kun shot to his feet like he'd been prodded with something sharp, threw Tsuna the all-time weirdest look that he'd ever seen on Gokudera-kun's face, and took off running again. Tsuna chased after him, shouting his name after him with whatever auxiliary air was in his lungs, and still Gokudera-kun ran. He gave no indication that he heard or saw Tsuna other than his ability to reach speeds of, apparently, Mach 5. Tsuna felt considerably less-justified in flunking P.E. with every minute he managed to keep his friend in sight. More than that, though, he was concerned with why Gokudera-kun was running away. Hadn't he promised so, so many times to always be there for Tsuna and to help him through all of the mafia-related crap that they had to slog through together and to protect him, and… And… God, Tsuna's side hurt! It was cramping up like crazy! And his head was still spinning and he still wasn't sure that Bianchi-san hadn't poisoned him and would it kill Gokudera-kun to slow down before Tsuna's lungs exploded?

How Gokudera-kun was able to maintain his speed Tsuna didn't know, but he knew that he simply could not go on much longer. He forced out one last, despairing, "Go…kude…ra…" and predictably, Gokudera-kun didn't turn to him. It hurt. And not only because Tsuna had never run this fast in his life of his own free volition, but because of something more. Because Gokudera-kun was his friend and Tsuna had been relying on him all this time. His eyes stung, his head reeled, and even when he was all but begging Gokudera-kun to turn around, he refused to. Tsuna's legs were suddenly out from under him—he'd probably tripped over something stupid—and he went crashing into concrete.

Holy crap, that hurt.

"Wha—JYUUDAIME?"

Tsuna knew he was imagining things because Gokudera-kun hated him now, and he knew that, because Gokudera-kun had gone running away from him at warp speed, and yet he still wasn't surprised when he found himself picked up and swung around to stare into the worried face of none other than Gokudera-kun. Gokudera-kun was, after all, always there. "Are you alright?" Gokudera-kun demanded, barely intelligible through his panting. "Do you have a concussion? How many fingers? I'm so sorry, I—" He changed gears very quickly, glowering fearsomely at Tsuna, who was still trying to formulate a reply to his first question and wasn't doing too well at it. "How could you be so careless, Jyuudaime? You must take better care of yourself, because I—! OH!" And then Gokudera-kun dropped Tsuna's head back against the concrete—ow—and instead covered his own face with his arms. Tsuna stared. No answer to Gokudera-kun's weirdness was apparent.

"Forgive my impropriety, Jyuudaime!" Gokudera-kun shouted. Tsuna stared some more. Gokudera-kun didn't move. Finally Tsuna sat up, having decided that other than two nice-sized bumps on either side of his head and a few scratches he was fine. He frowned for a second before reaching over to Gokudera-kun and tugging his arms aside. Gokudera-kun tried to hold them in place for only a second before he let them drop, staring ashamedly at the sidewalk as Tsuna tried to figure out what Gokudera-kun had been trying to hide.

"…Are you OK?" He asked after a moment of futility, and watching Gokudera-kun look steadily more pained.

"I'm fine, Jyuudaime," he said in a smaller voice than Tsuna was used to. "I apologize."

"Well, it's fine, but…" Tsuna scratched at his head uncertainly, found the tender spot there, and quickly dropped his hand. Ouch. "Can you tell me why you were running away? Um… Did I do something?"

Gokudera-kun closed his eyes entirely. His voice was steady, but barely a whisper. "The Jyuudaime did not seem to want to see my face. I was simply trying to… comply with your wishes."

"Well, don't," Tsuna said abruptly. Gokudera-kun's head shot up, shocked, as Tsuna burst into relieved, breathless laughter. "Ah, geez, Gokudera-kun, I thought that you… That you hated me or something! Don't scare me like that!" He patted Gokudera-kun's shoulder, pleasantly reassured that his friend really was there—and gaping at him like he'd grown another head—and leaned back to catch his breath. "You're seriously fast. Did you get like that from running away from Bianchi-san?"

"Excuse me, but…" Tsuna frowned at the overly familiar speech, and found that Gokudera-kun was still being weird. He was looking at Tsuna, but he was being… weird. He looked on edge, like he really did expect Tsuna to suddenly grow another head and bite him with it. That would be something Hibari-san would do, though. Definitely out of Tsuna's league. Under Tsuna's frown Gokudera-kun frowned as well, crossing his arms. "Can you tell me why you ran from me, then?"

It took a minute for Tsuna to remember what Gokudera-kun was talking about, and then he laughed again. "Oh, that! Sorry, Gokudera-kun, I was just…"

And then Tsuna promptly remembered all of the things that had apparently fallen out of his head while he was chasing Gokudera-kun.

Tsuna sank back to the concrete with a miserable groan as the world resumed its spinning and his stomach started flopping around again and he became suddenly unable to look Gokudera-kun in the eyes. Gokudera-kun appeared to be caught between fretting over the fact that something was definitely wrong with the Jyuudaime and maintaining the distance he now seemed to believe was unwaveringly necessary. So basically he hovered. Very closely. Tsuna's body was heating up with embarrassment. "S-someone just said something… really… really, REALLY weird to me..."

"What?"

And oh great, now Gokudera-kun was worried, hovering, and pissed off. Tsuna's favorite combination. Could this day get any better?

"How dare they offend the Jyuudaime!" Gokudera-kun roared, fishing around in his jacket for what Tsuna was sure would turn out to be a stick of dynamite. Seriously. No one was going to attack them at school. Why couldn't he leave the dynamite at home? Tsuna had borrowed one of Gokudera-kun's textbooks once and when he found what was concealed in the spine, he was pretty sure he was going to get arrested. "I'll kill them! Who was it, Jyuudaime?"

"Look, there's really no need for that," Tsuna muttered, waving his hand for Gokudera-kun to leave the dynamite alone. "And besides, you can't kill Yamamoto-kun."

Gokudera-kun glared fiercely at Tsuna and actually said, and rather believably too, "Oh yes I can!"

Tsuna sat up at once, horrified. "Gokudera-kun!" Gokudera-kun shrunk a bit under the glare Tsuna was giving him, and at least gave up on the dynamite. He scowled back at Tsuna anyway.

"I can't forgive him if he has acted against the Jyuudaime," Gokudera-kun stated, with a whine ever so slightly present in his voice. "I just can't."

"Look, he didn't 'act against me' and you're definitely overreacting," Tsuna said firmly, unwilling to bend even a little bit on his decision to not let Gokudera-kun try to kill his friend with a stick of dynamite. "You're not going to do anything to Yamamoto-kun." Gokudera-kun glared at him and Tsuna glared right back. "You're not."

Gokudera-kun grimaced, but finally heaved a sigh and the tension leaked out of his shoulders to the point that Tsuna felt he could expect sane and reasonable actions from Gokudera-kun. Or at least, actions from somewhere in that ballpark. It was Gokudera-kun, after all. "If that's what you want, Jyuudaime," Gokudera-kun muttered, looking far more put out than he had any right to. Tsuna smiled weakly, trying to convey the fact that yes, it was exactly what he wanted. Gokudera-kun looked up at him, not returning it, and even though he was there, Tsuna could still feel an uneasy distance between them.

I hate this, Tsuna realized, and let his smile drop. I really and truly hate the way I'm acting. Gokudera-kun has every right to be angry with me. He hasn't done anything wrong and I… I can't even look at him. If I even think about him, I feel so dizzy, so weak, like I'm sick. We can't work together when things are like this. And what if it doesn't go away? What if I can never be normal around Gokudera-kun ever agai—

"Jyuudaime," Gokudera-kun addressed softly, just looking at Tsuna now with a hopelessly forlorn expression on his face. "Can't you tell me what he said?"

"He… didn't really…" Tsuna trailed off, shrugging his shoulders helplessly. He couldn't explain this. He didn't really want to. The world was roaring in his ears.

"Then what's wrong?" Gokudera-kun asked, and he didn't seem to realize it, but he'd reached out to Tsuna a little bit. His hand was just over Tsuna's shoulder, hovering there like some invisible wall kept it off. That weird, sudden distance. Gokudera-kun never touched Tsuna unless it was out of necessity. Tsuna thought it was all about the mafia hierarchy, but with all these weird thoughts in his head it now seemed like something more. The look on Gokudera-kun's face had changed. His voice. Everything. The world had picked up speed and Tsuna was getting pulled apart by it. He really wanted to cry.

"I can't protect you if I don't know what's going on," Gokudera-kun said, frustration evident in his voice and in that hand that never moved, and just stayed there waiting for someone to smack it down. Tsuna pulled in shaky breath after shaky breath, trying to get air into his lungs and failing. His insides fluttered around wildly, practically thrashing, and no matter how hard he clamped his mouth shut the words still pushed their way out.

"Do you like me, Gokudera-kun?"

"Of course, I," Gokudera-kun began, confused and a little annoyed, and then stopped short as he took notice of Tsuna's expression and realized that hell had officially frozen over. His mouth fell open, and he closed it quickly because under no circumstances was drooling on the Jyuudaime a good idea. He tried to think rationally and Tsuna could tell, watching his brow furrow in his search for the appropriate response and, more specifically, how much he should lie to his boss. It also didn't seem to be going well, because Gokudera-kun's face had taken on a lovely pink color and was growing steadily rosier under Tsuna's gaze. "Uh," Gokudera-kun murmured inarticulately.

Tsuna seriously wanted to die. He could not believe he'd just said that. He was also pretty sure that his heart had stopped so he would get his wish.

"Yeah," Gokudera-kun said suddenly, casting his gaze away from Tsuna and to the nearest inanimate object, which happened to be a lamppost. "I do." Wow, was that lamppost fascinating. Gokudera-kun was, in fact, so fascinated that he probably wouldn't be able to tear his gaze away for the next few hours, at the minimum, provided he didn't pass out for any number of reasons, particularly the fact that he'd gone insane. Tsuna foiled his plans by turning his face back to him.

"Look me in the eyes and say it," Tsuna said, voice wobbling all over the place too. Gokudera-kun looked every bit as screwed up as he felt. Tsuna wished that none of this had ever happened.

He wished that Yamamoto-kun had kept his mouth shut.

He wished that Gokudera-kun had never made Tsuna chase him.

He wished that things would just slow down so he could think for two seconds, and then promptly got his wish.

"Fine. I like you," Gokudera-kun said firmly, bright red, and looking like he wanted to start running to Anywhere But Here at full speed, and like he also felt the world shaking itself apart. But he looked Tsuna in the eye, and he said it, and Tsuna knew he meant it. There was not a single lie in those words, no matter what context, and when Tsuna heard them, the world froze in place except for the two of them, staring at each other in a weird mix of horror, resignation, fear, trust, and…

"Oh," Tsuna said, mouth moving entirely without his permission and sounding very far away. "That's good then. Because I like you too, Gokudera-kun."

It was subtle, without all the reeling and spinning and stumbling around, but the world started back up again. Tsuna didn't care all that much. He was too busy staring at Gokudera-kun in vague disbelief, unable to believe what he'd heard, what he said, or what had, in the span of one day, revealed to him a feeling he'd spent two years accumulating underneath everything else he felt for his friend. He was suddenly really, really warm, from top to bottom, and felt Gokudera-kun's hand slowly touch his cheek, cupping it as they looked at each other and waited for something even stranger to happen.

Tsuna stood up abruptly. "I'm not going to think about it," he decided, and gave Gokudera-kun a stern look. "And you're not going to think about it either."

"But…" Gokudera-kun looked instantly crushed. "But you… Just now…"

"I said nothing," Tsuna retorted, pulling Gokudera-kun to his feet as well. "Stop hearing things. It isn't healthy."

"Wha…?" Gokudera-kun spluttered helplessly, and Tsuna kindly nudged him in the right direction to go back the way they'd came and in the general direction of residential neighborhoods. "But… I… But… Jyuudaime!"

"Stop thinking about it!" Tsuna commanded, face as fire-engine red as Gokudera-kun's own at this point. "I'm begging you, just leave it alone!"

"But you like me!" Tsuna found himself spun around to face Gokudera-kun, who still seemed a little bit shell-shocked, to be honest. Tsuna empathized. He might feel a little less traumatized by this moment in ten years. With therapy. And ice cream.

"I do not!" Tsuna growled, batting Gokudera-kun's—remarkably persistent—hands away. The same Gokudera-kun who never touched him was now apparently making up for lost time. If Tsuna wasn't fairly sure it was the fastest way to an early grave, he would have kicked him. "You were mistaken," Tsuna explained. "If I said something, which I most certainly did not, then it was nothing more than a slip of the tongue—not that I did!" He shouted, seeing a slow smile spreading over Gokudera-kun's face that was too… something for his own good. Tsuna was getting the urge to run away again. His voice rose to a whine. "Gokudera-kun!"

"I understand," Gokudera-kun said in a tone of voice that matched his smile and made Tsuna shiver in spite of the fact that his face had heated to the point that it was probably a viable cooking surface. "If this is what the Jyuudaime wishes, I will not pursue the matter any further." Tsuna let his shoulders slump in visible relief before Gokudera-kun, of course, set him on edge all over again. "For now anyway, just those words are more than enough."

…'For now'?

'JUST'?

"Ge-geh," Tsuna choked out, backing away from the crazy person. "You should just…"

"Don't ask me to forget them," Gokudera-kun said suddenly, cutting off Tsuna as he started to suggest just that. For a minute Gokudera-kun was as uncertain and shy as Tsuna, the Gokudera-kun of before who had put everything on the line to be honest with the one he—GYAAH! NO! STOP THINKING ABOUT IT! He looked at Tsuna anxiously. "Please don't ask that of me."

Tsuna crumbled like a wet cookie. "It's not like I can make you do it anyway," he muttered, shoulders practically around his ears (also bright red, by the way), as he started walking once more towards home. "But stop talking about it. I don't want to hear it."

"I'll wait you know," Gokudera-kun promised, and even if Tsuna couldn't see his face, the sincerity of the words was so painfully evident that Tsuna thought he was definitely going to die of embarrassment. "For the Jyuudaime… I can wait forever. And I will."

Tears welled in Tsuna's eyes, and he could resist the urge to run no longer. Gokudera-kun let out a surprised squawk before taking after him, shouting for the Jyuudaime to wait up. Tsuna, for his part, ran faster. Gokudera-kun continued to say embarrassing things in an embarrassingly loud tone of voice to a neighborhood that was pretty much embarrassed for No Good Tsuna.

"Seriously, I'll do anything, I will turn back TIME, just stop talking about it, Gokudera-kun!"