Hello all! Brand new story! ^^ My muses just came back. I started writing this story because I wanted to do something dark, but already it's progressed from that, and I'm not quite sure where it's going to go. However, I have an inkling, and a few ideas, but I know it'll all write itself out. I hope you guys enjoy it!

The Gods Would Laugh Chapter I

Their target was a drug lord who lived in the mountains. According to their information, he in the head one of the largest rings currently in Japan. Made sure his cocaine was where it needed to be all by computer. It'd made him hard to trace and harder to blame because he was so good at covering his tracks. It was actually fairly far from their head quarters in Tokyo, but hey, you had to do what you had to do. That's what they said, anyway.

Yohji was pissed. They were going to have to march through some damn woods and a mountain just to take out some guy who did evil things by hacking through his computer. Jesus Christ! Who decided who they had to kill, anyway? Yohji supposed there was some guy in Kritiker who liked to pretend he was God. Or maybe there was a whole circle of bastards who were in charge. More then once, Yohji had wondered if they weren't all evil sadistic bastards themselves. Now wouldn't that just be perfectly ironic?

But at least he was getting paid. Just making a living, you know. He really couldn't be blamed. It's not like he decided who should be killed or not. He was just the messenger.

That's what the Nazi's had said after World War II when faced with war crimes.

But what the hell. It was sort of humorous, all things considered. It was such a perfect façade. Who'd come up with it? Assassins in a fuckin' flower shop. You could make a movie or something about it.

Yohji took a long drag on his cigarette. It always amused him when some lady told him these things were going to kill him. Of course, he always just gave her a grin, but he always imagined just telling her that no, honey, he'd be dead way before some fucking cancer stick ruined his lungs. What was the expected life span of an assassin, anyway? It couldn't be very long. Even though he'd been killing for years, there had always been close missions, and he'd brushed with death often. It was the one thing he'd courted more then once. They were almost going steady.

Well, maybe he wouldn't die. Maybe his luck would run forever. Wouldn't that be horrid? He could make it to the top of Kritiker, one of the heads in charge that ordered a whole new group of kids to kill people who did and were 'evil.'

This whole 'evil' thing was damn ambiguous. He couldn't see how he'd been pulled into this, anyway. He could almost say he'd been tricked in because he was so torn up after the death of Asuka. When Birman had come offering a chance to get back at the world and fight for something he could believe in, he had jumped at the chance. But now where was he? In a job he couldn't get out of, and a soul stained with sin. He was going to burn in hell, and for what?

For nothing.

If that didn't blow all.

Yohji blew the smoke out and admired the ring it made.

When had he become so jaded, anyway?

* * * *

"I don't see why we have to go out so far for this mission," Yohji said aloud. He and Omi were at the kitchen table, eating one of their late night meals. Ken was out for a change, and Aya was.being Aya. He was by himself, reading a book. Or doing whatever he did when he wasn't around them.

Yohji wondered how one went about being so mysterious, anyway. Did he plan out his next moves? Come up with scenarios so that he would know how to act cold and cool, and collected? Or had he just been doing that for so long that it came natural to him now?

"Because, Yohji-kun, this guy is a drug lord. He's one of the heads that operates all the crime on the streets. He just managed to distance himself by living in the mountains."

"We're always killing warlords and drug lords. New ones keep popping up." Yohji trailed off. It was no use, really. Omi had created something that he believe in, and that was that he and his fellow members really were doing good and the people that died deserved it. Yohji wasn't quite sure how he did it, but hell, if it kept him busy.

Besides, what if in the eyes of God or whoever judged them, they were doing the right thing? Wouldn't that be so quaint and perfect?

Anyway, Yohji couldn't believe that that was anything more than just fantasy.

Yohji considered for a moment as he glanced over at the youngest member of Weiss. Of everyone on the team, Omi was the one he didn't understand the most. At first Yohji had thought Omi had some sort of façade he kept up, just like the rest of them, but the more he studied the kid, the more he realized that a lot of his emotions were on the top, and most of the time, his smiles were genuine. Also, the kid always had a way of saying something good about someone. Not something he said because he felt it was the right thing to do, but because he really saw the good side of the person and so expressed it. Yohji was fairly sure that any other seventeen year old would have gone nuts, or at least extremely depressed if his sister had died in his arms. Instead, Omi had rebounded after only a few short days. Apparently he'd worked it out somehow internally, and then he'd gone back to normal. Yohji wondered if there was somewhere deep inside where Omi harbored all the feelings he contained so quickly. Or was he really able to move on so quickly? Yohji sighed, understanding the teenager was extremely difficult.

"When do we leave?"

"Tomorrow morning. We're supposed to carry hiking gear. Manx brought the backpacks we'd need. Aya's packing his now."

Ah. So that's where he was.

"How long is this going to take?"

"He's actually really remote, so it's at least a two day hike."

"Jesus! We're assassins, not hikers!"

"Make sure you wear the right stuff! Anyway, you should pack too, Yohji!"

"What about you?"

"I'm done."

"And Ken?"

"He's finished, too," Omi grinned.

"Gahhhh." Yohji groaned. Nonetheless, he pushed away from the table and climbed the stairs, grumbling about having to hike the whole way.

* * * *

"We're going to take this route through the mountains," Omi pointed to an imaginary line on the aerial shots of the mountains they'd be going through or around. As far as Ken was concerned, Omi could be making it all up. Or they could go anyway they wanted. It just looked like a bunch of trees with some rocks. But, as long as his young friend didn't lead them off a cliff, it'd all be good.

"I'm not sure of it's the quickest route, but it seems to be the safest. Anyway, Kritiker has given us all GPS units, so if we get lost, just use those. There's an emergency button on it, just in case something happens. Okay guys! Let's go! Make sure to bring lots of water, too. Of course we need food, and tents and sleep bags.but that's why this backpack is so big!" Omi finished cheerfully, motioning to the large bag of his.

"Do we get a guide?"

"No, I've done hiking before and I know the basic rules, and from what Manx said, Ken was a boy scout, and Aya's family took hikes a long time ago. Looks like you're the only one who's going to have a problem," Omi smiled apologetically.

"This is a lot of work for one guy. Why don't we just get him when he comes out?"

"Because he doesn't. He stays in there all the time. He has his supplies air dropped for him."

".He must be one strange ranger, all alone in those mountains like that."

Omi shrugged.

"Let's go," Aya ordered.

* * * *

Aya was driving his car. Yohji was next to him, and Omi and Ken were in the back. To say they were a bit cramped was an understatement, but it would have been even worse in Yohji's car. Ah, the sacrifices they made for the job. Still, what could one do?

Omi sighed. It was boring riding in the car. His legs were cramping up, he'd finished his book, and there was no one to talk to. Ken was leaned back against his seat, his mouth dropped open. Even though Omi had turned his CD player up as loud as it would go, Ken's snores managed to drown it out. It'd gotten to the point where the normally patient boy was going to do something. He considered elbowing him in the stomach. It'd wake him up and it'd probably be humorous.

But.that wasn't very nice.

Hell. He was OK with killing people, but he couldn't wake his friend up with an elbow to the stomach? What had happened to his priorities?

"Omi, do something," Yohji ordered, startling Omi out of his thoughts.

"What?"

"Ken is making a huge racket. I can't sleep and I can't even concentrate on thinking about the girls I'm going to take out when we get back. Besides, Aya is developing a nervous twitch. Wake him up."

"But he's so peaceful." Alright, so he was a bit of a hypocrite there.

"Right now, he's anything BUT peaceful. Wake him up, Omi."

"Ne, Ken-kun," Omi shook Ken's shoulder. However, the brown haired boy slept on, oblivious. "Ken-kun."

Ken snorted especially loud.

"Alright! I've had enough!" Yohji turned around in his seat, and with his especially long reach, grabbed onto Ken's shirt and began shaking him roughly.

"Gyaaaaagh," Ken rattled as he was jerked back and forth. "Yohji!"

The playboy promptly stopped. "You were snoring."

"You didn't have to do that! You could've woken me up nicely!"

"We tried," Yohji shrugged as he turned back to look out the window. Ken glared over at Omi, whom should've tried to do something.

"We did," Omi smiled then, and Ken responded with his own. No use getting pissed off. Besides, he'd get his revenge on Yohji eventually.

"Just gotta love these family trips," Aya said suddenly, breaking the silence. The three other members of Weiss suddenly stopped what they were doing and stared at the red head, their mouths agape.

* * * *

"Here we are," Aya said, pulling the car into a remote lot designed especially for hikers. From here the team could see several paths leading into the trees.

"I can't believe we have to do this," Yohji complained, climbing out of the car. He was dressed in khaki cargo pants with a tight short-sleeved shirt. He had on a pair of Doc Martin hiking boots, and he was currently looking dubiously at the huge backpack.

"We've never had a mission like this before. It might be fun," Omi said, trying to be optimistic. He was in -surprise-cargo shorts with a cargo vest and a dark blue shirt. It was supposed to allow air in and keep the body cool. At least that's what the tag had said.

"Maybe this is Kritiker's idea of a vacation." Ken mused, pulling at his own cargo pants. "Anyway, it's a long hike."

"Too damn long," Yohji grumbled.

"Let's go," Aya said shortly.

* * * *

"Is this place supposed to be booby trapped at all?" Ken finally broke the silence they had maintained for the first hour or so. None of them had been on a mission like this before, and all admitted there was something strange about it. However, if Kritiker had assigned them the mission, then they had to do it. Maybe this was some sort of test on their part? Still, they'd been assassins so long that tests this late in the game seemed ridiculous. Maybe the heads of Kritiker were just bored. It was summer, after all.

"No. It's a long walk, the guy has excellent security on his computer, so it's virtually impossible to find him-"

"You did."

"Well, yeah.Anyway, since there's almost no real path to his house, it'd be hard to booby trap anything anyway."

"What about in close proximity to his home?"

"I'm not sure," Omi gave a small smile, as if that answered everything.

"It's going to rain," Yohji interrupted Aya and Omi's conversation. The two turned to the playboy.

"What?"

"It's going to rain. Look at those big storm clouds. They're coming our way," Yohji pointed to a huge, menacing thunderhead that did indeed seemed to be blowing in their direction.

"That's going to make thing worse, that's for sure," Ken glared balefully at the clouds moving their way.

"What do we do? Set up camp? Wait here next to the cars until it passes? Go home?" Yohji asked hopefully.

"No. We'll hike through the rain. We need to get there as quickly as possible," Aya explained shortly.

"Aa. Besides, we don't know how long this rain is going to last, Yohji-kun! It IS still rainy season, after all."

"Aya.."

"We're going to hike," Aya said in his 'end-of-discussion' voice.

* * * *

They were wet, miserable, couldn't see through the pounding rain, and had a hard time keeping their footing. Yohji was pissed because he couldn't light a cigarette, and when he'd tried to before the storm, Omi had glared at him and told him he would carelessly throw the butt away and then where would they be?

In a huge raging forest fire. That's where.

At least, that's how it was going to be, according to Omi. Yohji never had the chance to find out because Omi had plucked the cigarette from his hand and poured water from his canteen over it before putting it away in a little pocket of his vest.

"Damnit, I needed that!"

"No you don't. Besides, it's going to give you cancer and you're going to die."

"Omi, I'm pretty damn sure cancer isn't going to be the death of me."

Omi hadn't said anything in reply.

But here they were now, trying to climb up the fucking mountain. The rain had been coming down hard for the last hour or so, and there seemed to be no signs of letting up. Did all assassins have to put up with this sort of crap? He could see why it wasn't a very popular job if they did.

Besides that whole killing thing and damning your soul to hell for eternity thing.

"Whup!" Ken exclaimed suddenly as he lost his footing and fell hard on the unforgiving stones. They were currently making their way up a small deer path they had found, but it was very rocky and slippery and it was a wonder none of them had fallen worst and considerably hurt themselves.

"Ken-kun! Are you okay?" Omi turned around from where he was climbing behind Aya, his face one of concern.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Ken said, rubbing his shin as he pushed himself up.

"I think it's time we set up camp," Aya said suddenly, turning around. They had finally reached somewhat of a clear area, with little outcroppings of rocks around, and just enough space to put down the two tents. Aya himself had begun to grow absolutely miserable, and the sooner he got dry, the happier he'd be. Also, they needed to set up before nightfall, and because of the heavy clouds, night was falling sooner than usual. Besides, it looked like the rest of the team was well past ready to set up to rest. As Aya felt he had responsibility over them, he felt he couldn't push them too hard this early in the trip. They didn't know what they were going to run into later.

* * * *



"Look, Yohji! I'm absolutely sure this piece goes into this part!"

"No! It's supposed to cross over!"

"No! I've put up tents before! You connect it together at the top by pushing it through straight."

"It crosses over!"

"Damnit, NO!"

"Listen to me, Ken!"

"Jesus, Yohji. Let me do this. Just.hammer the stakes in or something."

"You're putting it together wrong. We're going to get rained on."

"Look, who was a boy scout? Who's never been hiking? Me or you?"

"Alright! We're done!" Omi's voice suddenly interrupted Yohij's and Ken's fighting, and the two temporary enemies looked over at Aya and Omi's tent, which indeed, seemed to be a model of perfection.

"What? How?"

"The ribs simply go through those holes at the top. It was easy after that."

Ken glared at Yohji, who glared back evenly. "I told you."



Aya looked over the small camp they had constructed. The tent Ken had put up was looking to be in pretty bad shape, and he wondered if either of them would fix it. The two were pretty pissed off at each other, though. He wondered how well it would go with them sleeping in the same tent.

Blood was so hard to clean.

As for his and Omi's tent.well, Aya felt a bit proud of how smoothly that had gone. They hadn't had any problems. It wasn't a great accomplishment, but in a world where life was difficult and doing things exactly right was hard, putting together a tent the right way was something one should be proud of.

After all, they could've had a tent that ended up like Yohji's.

Aya wondered why it was their luck that made it always rain. This would make the mission harder.

While Aya was NOT a religious person, he wondered if somewhere, there wasn't someone or something that hated them and enjoyed making life hell.

As if they wouldn't spend enough time there later.

Hell. Aya wasn't religious, his faith had been broken when his sister had been thrown into a coma and his parents murdered. His life had been totally and utterly destroyed in a matter of seconds. He had despised himself for so long after, 'what ifs' plaguing his thoughts and moments. And through it all, he wondered how God, or whoever, had allowed this to happen. He hadn't been big into religion before, but this has shattered everything.

So he'd left God, and religion, and he'd become an assassin to pay for his sister's medical bills. God had left him, too, and since Aya felt the situation was mutual, it was okay. However, he had a sneaking suspicion that the Devil existed and would be glad to drink the souls of the members of Weiss, Aya included.

How could he believe in one, but not the other? After all, weren't they supposed to be great enemies? One really wouldn't be able to exist without the other, right?

Strange, he usually didn't dwell in this sort of thing for so long. It wasn't worth the effort. It was too late to change back, anyway. Dwelling over his fate now would be like crying over spilt milk.

So in the meantime?

He could be proud of his tent.

* * * *

"Damn this rain!" Ken expressed vehemently. He and Yohji were crammed into the same tent. It was slanted where it shouldn't be, the roof hung down where water had begun to collect because they hadn't put the ribs in right, and to top it all off, they seemed to have chosen the rockiest place. Also, they were damp, and since they hadn't been able to dry off before getting in, their tent was also now damp. They had a little place for an electric lantern, and their sleeping bags were side by side. Beyond that, there wasn't much room except for their bags in the corner.

Both he and Yohji were in very foul moods.

"Damn this mission!" Yohji said sourly.

"How can Kritiker just send us up into the mountains like this? We're not hikers! We don't need to be discreet. They should've just send a helicopter up here and 'accidentally' dropped a bomb on his house," Ken paused as Yohji sent him a look. "Or something. Okay, maybe not a bomb. That would draw a little too much attention. But something!" Ken finished lamely.

"We're getting paid," Yohji said simply.

"Wonderful. When I'm standing at the pearly gates, I can just say, 'Yeah, I killed a lot of people, but I was getting paid.'"

"Don't forget to mention the flower shop."

"What?"

"The flower shop. Maybe you can bribe the angels with some flowers. Especially if the angels are women, then just give them a few flowers, and voila! They'll let you in."

Ken gave Yohji a glare.

"I wonder how Omi and Aya are doing right now? I bet they're dry," Ken said sourly, changing the subject.

"Why Ken, don't you know that being damp makes you appreciate being dry better?"

"Shutup."

Yohji gasped, making himself look offended, "Ken, that was simply uncalled for."

Ken gave Yohji another glare.

* * * *

While things were heating up in the other tent, Omi and Aya had already fallen asleep. They hadn't talked much.or really at all, except for the customary 'good nights' and so forth, and then a run through of the mission and what they had to do. The whole conversation had been cold and distant, which was surprising considering how long they'd known each other. But, there hadn't been much to say, anyway, and Aya didn't feel like he needed to waste his breath on small talk.

The night went without a hitch, and in the morning when they woke up, they found to their dismay that it was still raining. When Ken and Yohji climbed out of their tent, both were sporting bruises. Ken's right eye had become quite dark, and Yohji's lip was swollen. The two occasionally threw glares at one another, and the fact that they'd forgotten to bring coffee didn't lighten the mood at all.

"I'm going to have a cigarette," Yohji declared, glaring at Omi, just asking him dare to defy him, and when Omi didn't say anything, he gave a glare to the sky, making it clear that he was defying Mother Nature. His whole manner seemed to say that no matter what she was willing to throw at them, he was going to have his damn cigarette, and nothing, especially a little bit of rain, was going to stop him.

"What do we have to eat?"

"MRE's," Omi smiled at Ken helpfully.

"Oh no."

"Oh yes."

"Kritiker insisted," Omi said with a shrug, as if that answered everything.

"Kritiker has been acting odd recently. Why would they insist we talk MRE's.? Along with all this other gear, too."

"'Theirs not to reason why, theirs but to do and die,'" Omi quoted suddenly.

"What?"

"From a poem by a British writer by the name of Tennyson. It's called "The Charge of the Light Brigade," Omi explained, "We learned about it in school."

"What's it about?"

"It takes place during the Crimean war. It's about a failed battle where of the 600 men sent in, almost all died."

"That's.just.did you have to make that comparison?"

"Let's get packed," Aya said suddenly, interrupting them.

"We haven't even started eating!" Ken declared in protest. Aya had seemed to be pushing them unusually fast on this trip.

"Hurry up."

Omi hurried over to bring some of the MRE's out of his bag. They were slightly damp, and the whole meal tasted like cardboard. Yohji would not have eaten any if Aya hadn't insisted, and Ken went through it grimly enough. Omi did his best to lighten the situation, but already the moods of his teammates seemed to be as dark as that of the day.

They managed to pack up without any problems, but Yohji and Ken continued glaring at one another.

As the four climbed up the mountain, it seemed to grow even darker. The rain continued down on them as they straggled through a path made by deer or some other natural animal. Huge trees towered on all sides of them, and it was a battle to make it through the brush, which had grown heavy in areas. Aya was using his blade to cut through the heaviest, which made him quite sour as he considered what this might be doing to his blade. In fact, Omi seemed to be the only one who's mood wasn't completely foul, though already his legs sported a lot of scratches from the thorns and other random brush.

The four had to walk in single line, because there was no room for anything else. If they were to be attacked in this place, it would definitely not go well, and the chances of survival in such an ambush would be low. Although Aya was the only one who had given this prospect serious thought, the idea had crossed the minds of the others, and so as they climbed upwards, all were a bit uneasy.

"Get down!" Aya suddenly cried out, simultaneously diving to the ground. After years of quick reflexes and sometimes learning the hard way, the three behind him responded in an instant, each throwing themselves to the floor.

Moments later a large blade swung harmlessly over where they'd been, landing with a dull thunk in a tree behind them.

"A booby trap!" Ken exclaimed. "I thought you said there weren't going to be any!" The soccer player glared accusingly up at the youngest member.

"There weren't supposed to be," Omi said weakly.

"Well, shit!" Yohji cursed from the back of the line. "We almost died from something that wasn't supposed to be there!"

Aya climbed to his feet in the front, "We're going to have to be careful."

It doesn't make any sense for that to have been there. We're on a path that was made by deer. Who would waste time and effort to booby trap all the paths?" Omi said, upset by the fact that his misinformation had almost killed them.

"How paranoid is he?"

"It's just not feasible," Aya said, looking back at the tree that the pendulum had been lodged in. "For this to have been put here would mean he knew we were coming, and would use this path."

There was a moment of silence.

"Maybe he randomly puts traps on all possible trails on these mountains?"

"That's illegal."

"Well yeah, but so is dealing drugs."

"In either case we're going to have to tread carefully. Watch your step, and I'll warn you if I see something."

As the group continued their climb up, Omi looked into the deep woods, wondering if couldn't be something else. The coincidence of having a trap on the same trail they were using was disturbing.

~End Chapter I~

So! Tell me what you think! I have a few ideas for where this story is going. An appearance of Shwartz is a must, and I hope to make them main characters as well, shortly.