What Might Have Been
By Spencer x Reid x 143
AN: Hello, everyone, this is the first chapter of my first story :D
this hasnt been beta-ed so if there are any mistakes, please let me know
Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds or any of it's characters, I only own my Original Character :D
""For of all sad words of tongue or pen The saddest are these 'it might have been'"
A line from the poem "Maud Muller" by John Greenleaf Whittier."
My name is Azrael-Freya Tristessa, and this is a story about what might have been if I had followed my heart instead of my head. As most love stories start, once upon a time, mine does not. Mine starts with a boy and girl. Now, this isn't your classic love story, where the boy finds the girl and falls hopelessly in love with her and they all live happily ever after, no. Mine is a much more tragic tale.
It was May 7th, 1986. I had just been born on this stormy day, when my father decided that he did not want me, due to the fact that my mother gave her life to give me mine. I was lucky. He opted not to send me to an orphanage, but give me to my grandmother on my mother's side, so he would no longer have to see me. When he took me to her, it was almost as if the angels came down from heaven and began to sing. She took me into her house, correction, mansion, like I was her own daughter. Now, she was a little different from your normal elderly folk. She was, what my friend would like to call, a Lifestyle Lolita, which was a person, usually a female, who lived like the people in the Victorian ages. Yes, that meant that she dressed in Victorian clothes, which means I did as well, had manners of a noble Victorian woman, which she taught me, and lived in a huge Victorian mansion, which I would now call my home. I still dress in intricate Lolita dresses and treat others like I am a noble lady, despite my current job.
He grew up in a completely different life style from mine. He was from Los Vegas, which meant, he didn't live in the luxuries I had growing up. His mother, a genius literature professor at an university, who read to him almost every book that was ever published, was diagnosed with schizophrenia, when he was still young, which caused his father to abandon his only son and wife. When he was 18, he sent his mother away to a sanitarium. He still writes to his mother every day, telling her stories about the dangerous job he does, for he is afraid to go and visit her. He joined the FBI as the youngest profiler ever.
Of course, I don't want to sound like a snob in saying that I grew up better than him, because, in a sense, I didn't. After all, I didn't know how to work a TV or an iPod before I met him, heck; I was still listening to the record player my grandmother got me for my 12th birthday. Of course, he had never been to Madame Butterfly, so we taught each other about the good things that each of our lives were missing.
Anyway, this story takes place in the past, but not too far back.
It was June, 17th, 2009, when I first met him. It wasn't one of those romantic moments when as soon as you see him, you immediately fall in love with him, and he falls in love with you. In fact, the first time I met him, we knocked each other over. I was walking down the hall ways, looking for the office of Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner; he was running down the same hall, looking for the same person I was. I looked down to the piece of strawberry scented paper, which I had written an office number on, then I looked up, and I was on the floor. He was laying on top of me, in a compete daze, repeating 'I'm sorry', his voice squeaking. He was tall and skinny, with the deepest chocolate brown eyes I had ever seen. He helped me to get up, then we shook hands, and he told me his name. He then continued to run-walk down the hall, no doubt being more careful than he was before.
I watched as he continued to run down the hall, bumping into a few more people before he escaped my sight range. "Excuse me, can I help you?" a deeper, male voice, asked from behind me, I spun around to face the voice, and to my luck, there stood Agent Hotchner. "Hello, Agent Hotchner, I'm Freya Tristessa, nice to meet you." I said, extending my hand, which he shook, then he showed me to his office, where we sat and talked about what I would be doing, now that I was a consult for the FBI Behavioral Analysis Unit.
Recently, there had been an uptake in forms of sexual sadism in serial killers, and that is why I had been called in. You see, I just happen to be an expert in Anthropophagy, which is cannibalism, Thanatophilia, which is necrophilia, and Sadomasochism, which is both sadism and masochism. I'm not a profiler, I don't have any special titles, and I don't get a gun or badge. I'm simply one of those smart people you call in to help you with something no one else is qualified to do. Sorry if that was a little too much to take in. Basically, I help catch people like Ted Bundy, but I don't go out and chase people like Ted Bundy, I just help the people who do.
As you can probably tell by now, this isn't your average love story, and it gets better.
My first day on the job, I was shocked to see the man who had knocked me over in the hall, was apart of the team I was joining! Sure, I figured that he worked for the BAU, but he looked far too young to be an agent! I guess I shouldn't be talking, seeing as I look like I'm 14, even though I'm 24.
When I stepped into the bullpen, where everyone on the team was currently working on paperwork of some sort, I immediately headed for Agent Hotchner's office. He assembled the team in the conference room, with me standing at the head of the room with him, and the rest of the team sitting around the large round table in the middle of the room. He was the last one to walk in and take a seat, but as soon as he recognized me as the girl he had knocked down, his face turned beet red, and he turned away, hoping that no one noticed that his face had turned 6 shades redder than its usual tone. No one seemed to notice, or if they did, they didn't point it out.
Everyone was staring at me. I don't have a fear of crowds, I have a fear of the blonde with blue eyes, who was glaring daggers at me for no reason that I could think of...other than making the man who ran me over blush.
"Can I please have everyone's attention?" Agent Hotchner said, causing everyone in the room to look at him and me. "I would like to introduce you to the newest addition to our team, Miss. Azrael-Freya Tristessa."
"Hello, everyone. You can call me Freya if you like." I said, smiling at the man who knocked me over, he smiled back, causing the blonde to glare at him. He sunk back into his chair. "Freya, this is Emily Prentiss, David Rossi, Derek Morgan, Jennifer Jareau, and Dr. Spencer Reid." Agent Hotchner said, each person waving to me as their name was called out. Everyone, that is, except the blonde who I know is Jennifer Jareau. "Reid. You will be in charge of her. Show her around, introduce her to some people, oh, and she isn't a FBI agent, so she doesn't have a gun."
The man who knocked me over, Dr. Spencer Reid, stood up and walked over to me, as everybody else left the room, including Jennifer, who shot me another glare before leaving me and Dr. Reid in the room.
"Hello, my name is Dr. Spencer Reid." He said, shaking my hand and smiling at me. "You can call me Spencer if you like."
"Hello, Spencer. Nice to meet you again."
He let out a nervous laugh "Yeah, sorry for knocking you down in the hall."
"It's ok."
"If you don't mind me asking, did you grow up in Japan?" He asked, pulling out a chair for me to sit down in. I looked at him, shocked. Not because he asked if I grew up in Japan, but because he pulled my chair out, it was almost as if...
"I only ask, because the Lolita fashion subculture is usually found in Japan." He said, almost as if he was reading it.
"I didn't grow up in Japan, my grandmother did, how- where did you learn about Lolita?"
"I read it in a book." Dr. Reid said, as if the answer was obvious. "And based on the color of your Lolita, you're a casual Ama-Loli, but you follow the Lolita lifestyle based on how you sit straight up, and I've never seen you slouch."
I stared at him for a moment before asking, "I've never worked with profilers before, are all profilers this good?"
"Usually yes, but most wouldn't be able to figure out that you are a Lolita."
"Spencer?" I timidly asked, trying not to turn around and have to look at Jennifer who glared at me through the glass door of the conference room as she walked by. "Is Jennifer Jareau always seem so mean, or is it just me?" I ask timidly, trying not to seem too worried by her razor-sharp glares.
"She is glaring at you?" He asked, his voice raising an octave or two. "I've never seen her do that before." Spencer said, looking at me, shock evident in his eyes. "It's ok." I said, then he stood up, and reached his hand out to me, which I took and he helped me out of my chair. "Chivalry is something that should never die." Spencer said, holding the door open for me as we walked out of the conference room, him showing me around.
After the 'tour' was over, he showed me to my desk, which was right across from his desk. "Hey, I was looking for you." Jennifer said, walking over to my desk, carrying a rather large stack of paper work. I stood up and held out my hand so she could shake it, but she ignored my hand, instead plopping the large stack of papers on my desk. "You need to fill these out. We have to file them by tomorrow, so you should stop playing around and start on the work." She said, turning around and walking back into a room, which I assume to be her office. Spencer starred at Jennifer with an open mouth, no doubt surprised by her behavior towards me. I looked at the paperwork and sighed. This was going to be a long night.
Dear Diary,
June, 17th, 2010
It was my first day on the job, and I was so excited. I got ran into in the hall by Dr. Spencer Reid. He seems nice, but I think that Jennifer Jareau likes him. He seems to be around my age, but I don't want to be rude and ask him how old he is. I have to go now, Diary, Jennifer gave me a bunch of papers for me to fill out. It was nice of her to give them to me, so I wouldn't have to go looking for them. Bye!
AN: Well, thats my first chapter. Please review my story, I do not mind flames, they help me to get better :D