Hi! Welcome to Promstuck. I wrote this several months ago. Yes, it's a rom-com, and yes, it involves shipping. Just as a warning, pretty much all of my ships are disgustingly rare. Seriously. They're so non-canon they're nikon. So if you don't like the ships in this fanfic, please don't make any attempts to sink them. I know the full extent of their unpopularity and accept it wholeheartedly.

Thanks for bothering to read my horrible story. Enjoy yourselves, you sad sad little weaboos.

Tonight is prom night.

You have no idea what the fuck you were thinking when you agreed to this. You tug at the stupid, stiff jacket of the all-black tuxedo Kanaya managed to force you into wearing. Gog, this thing is uncomfortable. You're still sitting in Dirk's car in the parking lot of the Rosewood Hilton, where the high school had paid to set up this entire clusterfuck. Everyone else is outside. You still wish you hadn't come. If only she hadn't asked...

Your name is Karkat Vantas, and your life, as of tonight, is over.

You honestly don't know what the big idea behind this whole prom thing is. Apparently it's some right of passage in human teenage society or something. Everyone obsesses over one night for the first sixteen-to-eighteen years of their lives, seventeen in your case, then they get all dressed up and go to an expensive-as-hell, four-hour-long party where they make idiots out of themselves, dance, get drunk and, if they're lucky, laid. And frankly, you couldn't give less of a shit about it if you tried. You haven't even been going to your human friends' high school for the whole year. Rose and Kanaya were probably smarter than most of you, since they're not even taking part in all this human bullshit.

The only reason you're here is her.

Suddenly a noise breaks the silence. You jump in your seat. Someone is tapping at the window. You look up and see your idiot best friend standing outside, his dichromatic glasses peering in at you from the darkness. You growl under your breath.

"Fuck off, Captor. I'm not ready yet."

"Still?" He smiles at you like this is some kind of a joke. His lisp makes it sound like more of a "thtill" than anything elthe- you mean else.

"Yes. Now go away. I'll come out eventually."

"Everybody's headed inside. You're gonna miss them."

"Fine," you groan in defeat. Sollux pulls the door open for you. You almost throw yourself out of the car. Might as well get this over with.

Your friend catches you before you hit the ground and helps straighten you back up. "Okay, don't hurt yourself."

You shake him off. "Where are they?"

"Karkat!"

Someone's shouting your name. You know that voice. It's straight ahead.

Jade Harley.

Gog, she looks beautiful tonight. Too bad she's not your date.

"Hey, short stuff. Took you long enough."

And there's Dave Strider, right on cue. He's wearing his midnight crew tux. You have to admit, it goes pretty well with Jade's glittering black dress. You have no idea where she found it. She looks like she's wearing something made of pure galaxy. It's strapless, falling in a smooth cascade to the ground, sparkling strands of silver thread spun into the fabric and reflecting the millions of other colors that surround her. Her fluffy white dog ears stick out from her midnight-black hair, which Kanaya had styled to fall over her shoulders like a dark, silky waterfall...

Okay, now you're blushing. You really need to shut up.

You can't believe you were fantasizing again. Strider and Harley are not splitting up just because you, in some massive lapse of intelligence, fell for her. They've been dating for almost as long as you've known them, which was... screw it. You know you don't have a chance with her. Besides, you're here with someone else. You hear her loud, grating voice long before you see her. "Hi there, Karkles! You finally decided to show up!"

Terezi Pyrope is running toward you, her silky red chinese-style dress trailing around her ankles. Her hair's been pulled back and pinned with gold chopsticks to match the embroidery on her dress. You wonder if she picked the color just to make fun of you.

Gog, you hate her so much. It's one thing to go to prom with your ex, but this is ridiculous.

"Hey,Terezi," you mumble as she leans in for a hug. "Nice dress."

"Thanks. I picked it to match you," she giggles. So it was supposed to be a joke. Nice.

"Well, I'm here. Let's just get this over with, okay?"

Terezi grins and drags you over to the rest of your friends. You link arms, ignoring the angry words shrieking in your head that you wish you could let out and throw at her. Your friends gather around, talking, laughing, everyone humming with excitement. The heavily decorated entrance looms just ahead, sprinkled with tiny stars and model moons and planets to match this year's theme, "across the universe."

Yeah. Seriously.

Real funny, Avalon High School. You're fucking hilarious.

You've just stepped out of your car and into the cool, damp night air. It seems a little misty out tonight. It would be a bit of a spoiler if it rained on prom night.

You walk around the front of the car, open the passenger-side door and flash your copilot a gappy, broken smile. "Milady," you say jokingly.

Nepeta Leijon extends a ballet-slippered foot out of the open door. Her strapless, autumn-gold-and-green dress flounces around her in endless fluffy layers of shimmery tulle. It's a little shorter than what you would have approved of. But it's what Kanaya had picked. And you do have to admit, she does look pretty. Besides, it's her night. You promised.

"You're so formal," she giggles, fixing her glass-bead flower necklace before pulling herself the rest of the way out of the car. "Come on. Everyone's going in already."

You offer her a hand and she accepts. You see the rest of the crowd across the parking lot by the galaxy-themed entrance to the Rosewood Hilton. To be honest, you hadn't really wanted Nepeta to go to prom, despite how much it was stressed by the human students of Avalon High. You'd heard about the things that happen on prom night. Any sensible moirail would never allow their best friend anywhere near the infinite nameless horrors of human social gatherings. But she had insisted. And besides, everyone else was going. Including...

Speak of the she-devil, there she is right now. She's even lovelier tonight than you have ever seen her before. She looks like an angel, with her gothic white dress edged with tattered lace, tousled waves of raven hair tumbling over her shoulders, her twisted horns shining in the light...

Oh gog, she just turned around. Your palms start to sweat. Nepeta squeezes your hand.

Aradia Megido is staring straight at you. And she's standing with Sollux Captor. You should have known he'd be her date. Not you. Never you.

Your name is Equius Zahhak, and you have basically given up.

Aradia smiles and waves at you. She lets go of her date's hand and starts making her way over to you, the hem of her dress fluttering. "Hi, Equius. You actually came," she says with a slight smile. "And you brought Nep. Really didn't think you had it in you."

"Well... she insisted," you say shyly, trying to ignore the royal blue blush burning your face. Sweat beads on the back of your neck. Gog, why is she so beautiful?

"He said I could have the night to myself," Nepeta chimes in, saving the conversation. "I mean, even the dress was a bit of a stretch. But he's purrfectly okay with it. One night. Right?" She nudges your shoulder. It's your turn to speak.

"Um... Yes. Right," you stammer. "But stay out of trouble, okay? Remember what we agreed."

She nods, smiling. "Mhmm." She squeezes your hand again, then lets go and scampers off. You watch as she disappears into the crowd, letting out a worried sigh. You really hope that nothing goes wrong tonight. You wouldn't want to have to bring her home early or anything else drastic. She knows you only act the way you do because you care about her. She's like what the humans would call your little sister. You only want to protect her, keep her safe...

"Equius? Is something wrong?"

You jolt back into focus and turn back to Aradia. Sollux is making his way through the crowd towards her. Feferi is trailing not far behind. "Um... yes, just... thinking about something..." Oh no. You're sweating again.

You can't do anything but watch blankly as your crush turns away and calls her ex-matesprit over. They'd been broken up for a while now. If only they weren't still so close.

You don't know if they'll ever get back together or not. You only know one thing for sure. She'll never be yours.

Before you know it, you're watching her swaying skirt disappear into the crowd after Sollux and his shot-silk dress shirt. Nepeta materializes out from the crowd. "Equius?" she chirps. "Are you okay?"

You shake yourself out of your trance and pretend to be fixing your tie. "Yes, of course. I'm fine," you say, forcing a smile.

To be honest, you didn't really think that sky blue would work so well as a tuxedo color. Kanaya really knows how to make things work. It seems a little weird that she put so much time and energy into helping everyone else out to get ready for an event she wasn't even going to. But that's just what she does, you guess.

Tonight is going to be the best night ever. If that isn't true, then you have no idea what is. You've gotten everything right so far, right down to the bow tie. You honestly don't know the first thing about how prom is supposed to work. But it's okay. Most of your friends don't either. Except Dave. He was on the committee, after all.

Dave is the best friend ever. He was the one who had convinced you to go through with this whole prom shenanigan in the first place. If it weren't for him, you probably wouldn't have had the confidence to show up. You want this to be, if anything, one awesome night between two best bros. And you're sure that's what Dave's plan is too.

That is, if you knew where the hell he is.

Of course, he had to bring a date. Jade's been his girlfriend for pretty much ever, so of course he asked her. He's probably somewhere hanging out with her.

You start to poke around in the crowd gathered around the still-closed entry doors. There are so many people here. Sadly, none of them seem to be Dave.

You try to figure out exactly where Dave's gotten himself to. You remember he was part of the prom committee. Maybe there was something wrong with the sound system or lights or something. He'd probably have to run in and fix that before the people start flooding in.

Or maybe he found another door that was unlocked and he's somehow gotten in early.

Then there's Jade to consider, too. Maybe they've run off to Lala Land together or something. Oh, wait, there she is. And... there Dave isn't.

Oh, well. It seems that you can't find him. But that's okay. You're sure he'll turn up.

Sometime.

Eventually.

Goddammit.

Your name is John Egbert, and your best friend, Dave Strider, is being a gigantic asshole.

You can't believe you let yourself get dragged into this. No, wait. That's a lie. No one dragged you into this whole prom schtick. You were just stupid enough to decide to come here of your own free will.

Alone.

At first, you honestly had no idea what there was to be stressed about. You knew how parties worked. You've gone to them before. The outfit wasn't too big a deal, either. You're sexy enough to pull off pretty much anything. The black satin tux, purple silk shirt, and silky blue scarf you're wearing are more than perfect for the occasion, especially on you. Prom night itself wouldn't be too much different than any other school dance you've been to, either. So there was absolutely nothing you could think of to stress over.

That is, until you actually showed up.

You should have known she's be here. And that he would be here, too. As her date.

You have never hated Feferi Peixes or Sollux Captor more in your entire life.

You are now honestly questioning why the hell you even bothered coming here in the first place. What the hell had possessed you to make you think, "Oh, hey, you knoww wwhat wwould be fun? Comin to the biggest evvent of your entire high school lifetime all by yourself for the sole purpose of embarrassin yourself in front of your ex!"

And not just her. Everyone else, too.

They're all your exes.

Okay, you might have overreacted just a little after Feferi ripped your still-beating heart out of your chest and threw it into a ceiling fan. Yes, you were upset, and no, you weren't exactly thinking clearly, but now that you look back on it, having a fling with half the people you knew probably wasn't the best way you could have gotten back at her. In fact, it might have been one of the worst. It didn't do a damned thing to upset her. All you really did was make a huge slut out of yourself. Not to mention the fact that all of your friends hate you now. Jegus, you can be such a dumbass sometimes.

Your name is Eridan Ampora, and this is going to be awkward.

You have no idea where your train of thought was going when you decided to go to this huge hormonal teenager function. First of all, you would be alone. As fuckin' always. Secondly, as of now you have been rejected by nearly everyone you know. Not only that, but the reputation you've built yourself has pretty much obliterated every chance you will ever have of finding a relationship ever again. Third...

You had completely forgotten that princess lowwblood-lovver would be here.

Now you're standing alone in the crowd, watching her from a distance. You take in every detail of her. She's beautiful and just as fucking perfect as ever. She's wearing an aquamarine mermaid dress, following suit with Kanaya's rule that no one was allowed to wear a dress the same color as their blood. Something about leaving behind the old regime and accepting the human ways or some shit. Like that's ever going to happen.

The full skirt of her dress sweeps around her like ocean waves. There's some kind of glittery fuschia detailing around the bodice and towards the top of the skirt. Sequins, you think. Maybe beads. Her long obsidian waves of hair have been pulled delicately away from her pretty face, half up and half down. She's wearing the silver-and-pearl shell necklace that you-

Oh shit, she just noticed you staring.

You try to act casual as she waves and flashes you a white pageant-princess smile. "Eridan!" she giggles, taking a few dainty, high-heeled steps toward you.

What the hell is she so fucking happy about?

"Hey, Fef," you shout back to her, forcing a smile.

She prances over to you and gives you one of her tight, heartfelt hugs that everyone loves her for. Gog, you miss the days when she gave them just for you. "I didn't think you were coming," she says, her cloud of silky black hair pressing against your cheek. It's all you can do not to bury your face in it and inhale its sugary floral scent.

"Why were you thinkin' that?" you respond with the most warmth you can manage. "This is the biggest deal of all the deals that humans can make in their young lives. I would never be missin' out on something this huge."

She pulls back from the hug and smiles. "Admit it. Everyone knew all our fronds would be here tonight. You just wanted to swim along with the rest of the school, didn't you?" She playfully taps your nose. "Didn't want to spend the night by yourself, huh?"

Too late, Fef. Too fucking late. "Well, Rose and Kanaya would have-"

"Hey, FF! Where'd you go?"

Oh gog. You recognize that voice. You should have known that wherever Feferi went, he wouldn't be far behind. How could you have forgotten?

Before you can even finish your sentence, Sollux Captor materializes out of the crowd. You have to admit, he looks almost as stunning as you, dressed in a black tuxedo, white tie and shot-silk shirt to match his bicolor glasses. It almost makes up for the fact that his shoes are mismatched. Your ex-matesprit turns to smile at her date. Your heart is pounding. Heat starts to build up in your chest. You feel a purple blush starting to burn the skin of your cheeks.

Gog you hate him so much.

Then they start chatting. Then Aradia shows up. Then there's more chatting. Before you know it, you've become all but invisible. They're talking about you as if you're not even there anymore. As if you don't even exist. You should have figured just as much.

You've been with and been rejected by everyone you know. You don't know why you even bothered coming here. You knew you'd only be coming alone. And you're pretty sure that you're going to stay that way for the rest of the night.

It's prom night. It's the night that almost everyone you know has been looking forward to for almost as long as you've been going to this human institution called high school. You have to admit, you've been looking forward to it as well.

But you're not here for the party. You're here for a different reason entirely.

You've come to prom with your lame-ass fairyboy ex, but you don't really care. Even though you broke up over a year ago, he's still good to keep around for things like this. It's not like you could find another date, anyhow. If none of the humans in this awkward little Washington town can't hold your interest long enough to keep up a stable romance of any kind, it's not your fault. You're just too damn amazing for them.

You'd picked your dress well. After what must have been days of searching, you'd finally settled on a red-violet corset gown overlaid with black lace. You'd paired it with a black beaded choker and, much to Kanaya's dismay, at least thirty black rubber bracelets on each wrist. You've gotta say, the corset bodice is hot on you, and the look you've gotten down is edgy as hell. But there's more to this outfit than just looking the part. That huge, billowy skirt of yours isn't just for show. You sweep a hand casually against the layers of fabric covering your thigh. Your hand collides with a small, hard lump with a stifled metallic thunk.

Your flasks are still in place. Perfect. You knew your fishnets could hold them up.

You can't help letting slip a mischievous grin. This plan is just too perfect. The doors will be opening in just a few minutes. No one will notice you walking in. Neither will they notice when you casually stop by the punch bowl, or when you slip a hand through your endless skirts and dump two flasks full of vodka into the mix.

A little inebriation never hurt anybody. Now all you have to do is sit back and watch.

Your name is Vriska Serket, and things are about to get very interesting indeed.

You have no idea why you're here. You're pretty sure it was only because this was the place all your friends would be tonight. Everyone you knew was going to this whole motherfucking "prom" thing, so you figured, why the hell not? It's not like you had anything better to do. Well, other than spend the night stuck at Rose's house all by yourself. Besides, prom did sound pretty fun. Humans seemed to get pretty motherfucking excited over it. So you showed up. The ticket cost you sixty bucks, too. This had better be motherfucking worth it.

Your name is Gamzee Makara, and you don't even know why you're here.

You showed up here on your own. Well, not exactly. All your friends were going, too. So you guess that means you weren't going alone. But then, you're not really sure if saying that you have thirteen prom dates sounds right. So you just decided to stick it out and, if anyone asks, say that you were going with Tavros. You still want to keep him close. It didn't really matter that you broke up over six months ago. You're still friends. At least you hope so. You don't think you could even imagine living without him. Besides, his date doesn't seem too motherfucking keen on staying with him the whole night.

It didn't take too long to realize that you had no idea how proms were supposed to work. At least you look the part. Kanaya sure did a number on you. She'd picked you out a white shirt, gray vest and pants with an indigo skinny tie to match the satin ribbon of your top hat. Gog, that hat is such a nice touch. Kanaya is a motherfucking genius. It definitely took a genius to get your hair in order. She somehow managed to straighten it into a feathery curtain that swept over your eyes and fell almost to your shoulders. She'd told you to skip the clown makeup at least for tonight. You said that you had no idea what she meant. Then she swiped some eyeliner onto your face, told you that you were done, and shoved you out of the bathroom. You guess she had a point.

You have no idea what had convinced you to show up to prom in the first place. You put Kanaya through all that shit to make you look presentable. You're also sixty dollars closer to being totally motherfucking broke. You know for a fact those tickets don't have refunds.

But you're here now. May as well make the most of it.

This is probably the most exciting night of your entire life. You have never felt more excited. The excitement has been building up inside your head for days, and now it's all coming out in one big excitement-splosion.

Yeah, you're pretty freaking excited.

You've been looking forward to prom night for the past few weeks. It's been all you could think about for so long. At first, you'd thought that Equius wouldn't let you go. You know that he's always concerned for you and all that other wonderful moirallegiance stuff, but he can be so overprotective sometimes. Then he came to you after school that fateful day and showed you the tickets he'd bought. He asked you to "accompany him" to prom night. You'd nearly had a heart attack and dropped dead from happiness right then and there.

He'd promised you the night afterwards. On prom night, he would set you free. You'd be allowed to do whatever you wanted, and he promised not to get involved or intervene in any way. As long as things didn't get out of hand, that is. But you knew enough to determine which lines were not to be crossed. Both of you knew that.

You've been fluttering around in the crowd for the past ten minutes or so, talking to all of your friends one after another, physically unable to stop talking. You couldn't be more pumped full of energy if you'd slammed ten cans of Monster. You can't wait for those glittering, galactically-decorated doors to open. You just know that the perfect night is waiting just inside. And it's been all you could think about for-

"Nepeta, um, you're repeating yourself," a stuttery voice says.

You blink and shake your head to clear it. Tavros Nitram is standing next to you, his trademark shy, nervous expression twinged with boredom. He tugs nervously at the chocolate brown jacket of his tuxedo and adjusts his tie for the tenth time in the past two minutes that you've been talking to him. Which you'd completely forgotten you were doing. Just got a little sidetracked, you guess.

"Sorry, Tav," you giggle, offering him an apologetic smile. "I just can't help it. I'm-"

"Excited. Yes. You, uh, told me," he stammers. He looks toward his shoes and slides his hands into his pockets. You've never seen him more nervous in your life.

"Hey. You okay, Tavros?" you chirp, lifting his chin to make him look at you. "You're shaking more than a feathery toy at the end of a string."

You feel his face heating up under your fingers. "Yeah, I'm fine, there's, uh, nothing wrong."

"You pawsitive?"

"Yes, I, uh, I'm sure." He takes a step back and you let go of his face. You know for sure that he's not fine at all. You have no idea why. But you're sure he'll get over it.

"Hey, um, shouldn't you be with Equius?" he says unsteadily, continuing to make tiny adjustments to his outfit as he speaks. "He's your date, right?"

"Well, not really. We're just going as meowrails. Were you thinking that maybe-"

"Yes, Tavros, what were you thinking?"

You see your nervous friend's eyes widen as he looks up at someone behind you and stumbles back a step. You spin around to face the stranger.

"Equius!" you purr. You take your moirail's hand and give his strong fingers a squeeze. His palms are sweating again. He must have been talking to a certain someone again. A certain undead, rust-blooded someone.

"I've been looking for you for ages. The doors are going to be opened soon."

"They are?" Your heart starts pounding. Your head is all in a whirl. This is the moment you've been waiting for. "They are?!" you squeal again, excitement practically spilling out of your ears. Your gaze flicks back and forth between the entrance doors and your distressed role-play buddy. You look to Equius, trying to convey a reminder of his promise with your eyes. He looks back down at you and gives a slight nod. You let go of his hand, prance forward, and sweep Tavros up into a warm, reassuring hug. He shivers. Gog, you knew he was nervous, but not that much.

You don't let go until you're sure that Tavros's nerves are under control again. You pull back and smile brightly at him. "You'll be purrfectly fine. Just have fun tonight, okay?"

He smiles shyly back. "O-okay."

Satisfied with your work, you slip your hand back into your moirail's and let him tow you through the crowd to the entrance. The crowd seems to have gotten thicker since you were last here. The doors must be opening soon. You cling tightly to Equius's fingers. You aren't sure if you can take much more of this suspense.

A single noise rises up above the hum of the crowd. There's a click. Your eyes widen and your gaze locks onto the entrance doors. They're slowly starting to swing open.

"Equius! Equius, look!"

You're jumping up and down in place, giggling and squealing, completely unable to contain yourself. You grip Equius's hand in yours and the crowd starts to sweep forward and flows into the hotel ballroom.

For one whole night, you will finally get to be free. And you are determined to do so for all it's worth.

Your name is Nepeta Leijon, and tonight is going to be the best night ever.