SmashMart
Hello fellow Smash Bros. fans! What happens when some of our beloved Smashers visit a local Walmart? Well…you'll just have to find out yourself! And I don't know why I even have to bother, but I'll say it anyway. I DON'T own Smash Bros. OR Walmart. Both belong to their respective owners bla bla bla…
"Ugh, I hate shopping." Link grumbled to himself as he walked toward the super Walmart. He was accompanied by Olimar with his 100 Pikmin, King Dedede, Peach, Pit, and Kirby.
Walking into the massive building, they got several carts as Peach starting handing out lists "Okay Olimar, here's your part of the list. You and Dedede get all the food." The Mushroom Kingdom princess said as she handed the astronaut the long piece of paper. "And here is yours Link, you and Pit get the toiletries and cleaning supplies. Kirby and I will be at the health & beauty section. We will all meet back here where I'll pay the cashier with Master Hand's credit card."
After each Smasher got their respective lists and went their separate ways, Link and his angel shopping partner made it to the isles with toilet paper, window cleaners, and other such things.
"Alright, let's see here." Pit said as he examined the list in his hand. "We need three packages of toilet paper, two bottles of shower spray, eight rolls of paper towels…" as he droned on while Link gather the items and put them in the cart, neither of them noticed a certain green dinosaur running straight for them.
CRASH. Yoshi ran right into the kart, sending all its contents (and the two people behind it) sailing across the isle. "Ouch! What the heck Yoshi!" the Hylian yelled as he got up rubbing his bottom. Pit was none too pleased either, picking himself off the ground and dusting his wings off. "Yeah, what's the big idea slamming into us? What are you doing here anyway?"
"Oh sorry you guys, me and some of the others at the mansion got bored." The dinosaur said with his head hung low. Brining it back up, he added with a cheerful tone, "So Ness, Lucas, Toon Link, Popo, Nana, and I decided to come over here and hang out with you guys!"
"That still doesn't explain why you ran headlong into us!" Link complained in annoyance.
Yoshi answered him with his high-pitched voice, "Oh, we are all playing tag and I thought someone was behind me. Guess not! Here I'll help you pick this stuff up."
CLEAN UP AT ISLE 4! The store microphone boomed. "Hmm, I wonder what happened over there." Peach pondered. She and Kirby were selecting the specific shampoos, deodorants, soaps, and other body care products that each Smasher preferred. "I don't know why I bother to get Wario toothpaste. The man still has rancid breath even if he uses the whole tube at once!" the princess stated with a stomp of her high-heeled foot.
"Poyo? Poyo." Kirby said with a confused expression on his pink circular face. Shifting the basket filled with various items that balanced on his head, the star warrior followed Peach to the end of the isle.
"Tag, your it!" the two turned their heads to the left out of the shelf line to see a boy with brown hair wearing a red baseball cap and another with blonde hair running around the toy section just a few isles over. "Ness and Lucas? What are they doing here?" a shocked Peach exclaimed.
After the two psychic kids ran past them, Kirby picked up a small piece of paper that one of them left behind. "Poyo! Poyo!" he shouted to grab Peach's attention.
"What is it Kirby?" Removing one of her hands from her shopping cart handle, the princess took the wrapper from her shopping companion, looking at it carefully. "Oh no! They ate Suger Stix!"
Meanwhile, way over at the other end of Walmart at the expansive food section, Olimar with his many Pikmin and King Dedede were almost finished collecting the mountain of various foods. Due to the half plant-half animal creatures' knack for carrying things, they didn't even need a shopping kart.
"I gotta say Olimar, your Pikmin are way more competent then my Waddle Dees could ever be!" the penguin king exclaimed with a big grin as he gave the space traveler a good pat on the back. Returning the smile, Olimar was just about to command his cohorts to carry the goods toward the register when suddenly three kids, two wearing parkas and one wearing a green tunic, burst onto the scene. "Eeekk!" the Pikmin screamed as they scattered every-which-way.
"Ooo, let's play with the little Pikmin!" Popo shouted as he and the others started to chase the frightened creatures around a stall of watermelons.
"Hey, what are you guys doing here!" Dedede hollered as he tried to stop the four sugar charged kids from ruining the assembly of food laden Pikmin. But he and his dwarf companion couldn't stop the chaos unfolding before them.
Within a minute, what was originally an organized caravan of frozen, fresh, and preserved foods was now a scene reminisnt of a cafeteria riot. Fruits and vegetables lay crushed on the floor. Boxes of cereals, chips, and soda cans lay opened up and spilled of their contents. Basically, a total complete mess!
Peach, Kirby, Link, Pit, and Yoshi met up in the middle of the building, wondering why the other two hadn't joined them already.
"I bet they ran into Ness and Lucas!" Peach said in horror.
"We better find out fast. They all downed enough sugar to buzz an elephant!" Yoshi shouted.
At that revelation of information, they all rushed for the food section, but it was too late. By this point Ness and Lucas joined their trouble making cohorts and added to the mayhem. Olimar and King Dedede lay panting on the floor; they couldn't keep up with the young Smashers' relentless antics. The Pikmin themselves were scattered all over the place, either staying still shivering like trees or still being chased by some of the kids.
"Great Palutena…" Pit breathed as he scanned the scene before him.
Link turned to the dinosaur beside him and asked, "Yoshi, when did they eat the sugar?"
"I think it was about an hour ago. That was when they went crazy and headed over here. I thought they just wanted some fun so I joined them." Yoshi answered, "Little did I know that they were charged on pure sweetness!"
"Then it shouldn't take much longer before they crash." Peach announced. As if her words were magic, the mischievous little ones all fell to the floor into a torpid stupor.
"Well that was easy." Link said simply. Turning his attention to the piles of ruined groceries, he added, "Now we just have to clean up this mess!"
First thing the group did was gather the slumbering kids together, then Olimar (after he and Dedede regained their breath) used his whistle to bring his Pikmin back to his side.
"Alright Kirby, you know what to do." Peach stated. With a nod, the Dream Land denizen opened his mouth as wide as he could and sucked up all the smashed and otherwise wasted foodstuffs.
After the throng got another batch of groceries, they all headed to the (rather baffled) cashier. Clearing his throat, the man said "Um, you do realize that you will have to pay for all the extra food you destroyed plus damaged property." "Oh, of-of course." Peach replied nervously as she handed him the credit card. "Master Hand isn't going to be happy about this." She added under her breath.
Standing off from the others, with a sleeping Popo and Nana in his arms, Link let out a long heavy sigh. "Now I REALLY hate shopping."
And that is why the young Smashers should never have any amount of sugar! I think this is going to make up most of my writing, funny little oneshots. Side note: Those of you who are waiting for the next chapter of my main story "A Boy and His Bird", don't worry, I'll get to work on that soon. Anyway, make sure to review!