Author's Note: Written for the "Little!Bang" challenge at stargatelandLJ. Spoilers for Episode 1x02/1x05.
Prompt: Chloe/Memorial
Summary: He is gone but she is still here. The questions is what is she going to do now? Surprisingly it is Greer who gives her the final nudge.
Disclaimer: I own neither the show nor the characters. I don t earn any money with this piece. I just do it for fun.
She's standing just outside of the control room, alone in the deserted corridor, pressed against the wall in the shadows and listens intently to the hushed conversation that takes place.
The words "body" and "dispose" echo in the air and Chloe flattens her palm against the bulkhead, closing her eyes tightly. She knows without a doubt who they are talking about. Her father. Her dead father. The man who sacrificed himself to save them and who's stiff and cold body has to be removed from the damaged shuttle so they can start on the repairs.
I miss you, Dad, I miss you so much...
Leaning her forehead against the back of her hand, Chloe suppresses a sob and bites down on her lips but she cannot keep the tears at bay. They burn her soul as they slide down her cheeks and drop silently, one by one, on the cold floor.
"She has a right to know!"
Matt's raised voice startles her back to reality and Chloe's eyes fly open. Barely daring to breathe, she strains her ears to hear the answer.
"Lieutenant Scott!" That's Young. "Calm down."
"I am just saying she has a right to know."
"I don't think that's a go-"
"He's right."
Surprised Chloe turns her head towards the open doorway, her tears and grief forgotten for the moment.
"Rush?" Apparently she is not the only one who's taken back by Doctor Rush's opinion.
There's shuffling as if someone moves around something wide and when Rush speaks again, his voice sounds much closer than before. She guesses he was on the other side of the control station, rather working than taking part in the discussion.
"Miss Armstrong is not a small child, Camile. She won't throw a tantrum and demand to leave her father there until he can be buried in Earth's soil."
Someone snorts and mutters something under their breath. Chloe catches the words "attack you before" and she blushes, her face burning with mortification. Who are they to judge her? They don't know what it's like to lose someone like this, what it does to your mind and soul, how it turns your whole world upside down.
"Mister Brody, unlike you I understand Miss Armstrong's reaction and do not hold it against her. If we hadn't pried that door open, Senator Armstrong wouldn't have felt the need to sacrifice himself."
"He would have died anyway," T.J.'s gentle voice carries through the open doorway and Chloe flinches at the undeniable truth of her words. "Don't you think it would have hurt her just as much? Maybe even more?"
Rush sighs. "Aye, I'm aware of that but even if it sounds harsh, this way his death was not in vain and I am sure Miss Armstrong sees it the same way."
"Ever the rational, hm?" Young's sarcasm is cutting and Camile starts to intervene before another argument can break out but Chloe isn't listening any longer. Mulling over Rush's words, turning them over and around in her mind, she is surprised (and yet not) that she agrees with him.
Her father's stubborn as a mule and no matter what, he still would have decided to save them all, sacrificing himself the way he did. Her anger and fury resulted more from her helplessness and the situation itself than Rush's actions. Her father left her no choice but to accept his decision and since she couldn't take it out at him, she turned to the next available target - Rush. He was the prefect scapegoat and she cringes when she thinks about her loss of control.
Her father would not be proud and probably lecture her about the right behavior of a Senator's daughter and the thought makes Chloe smile, a sad but real one, the first since her father's death. He may be gone (forever) but as long as she remembers him, her won't be forgotten. He gave her the chance to live and she would be a fool not to take it. It's not easy and finding her place among all those geniuses and muscles is the hardest challenge right now but at least she is alive.
"That's my girl," Chloe hears her father's voice and she takes a deep breath, wipes away all traces of her tears and straightens up. Then she pushes away from the wall and turns around.
"Miss Armstrong."
"I was-, I mean, I was not-" Her voice is thick with emotion.
"I know." Sergeant Greer nods towards the room where the others are still debating about whether she should be informed or not. "Preparin' yourself to go in there and tell them to stop makin' decisions for you?"
Greer is someone Chloe can't really put in one box or another. He's pretty much jumping all over the place, one moment all deep and smart, the next throwing people around like they're paper balls. And yet she doesn't feel threaten by him.
Chloe smiles ruefully. "Yeah, something like that." Slumping back against the wall, she stares at the floor. She feels Greer watching, studying her, and after a few seconds he steps closer and leans against the bulkhead next to her.
"You know, your dad was resolved to go in that shuttle. He had the gun pointed at me and yet I could have taken him out." He pauses, gauges her reaction. "But I didn't."
For a moment Chloe is confused, doesn't know why he's telling her that. Greer glances at the doorway before he turns back to her. "Why did you blame him and not me?"
Ah, that's what it is all about. Chloe groans, presses her face into her hands and her voice is muffled as she answers him. "Because Rush is Rush. It was easier. He had the idea to open that door, he decided that someone had to be sacrificed and when I saw Dad missing, I knew what he was going to do. Dad left me...and in that moment I just couldn't...I lost control."
Her hands fall down and she pushes herself off the wall again, a tiny smile stealing its way over her face. "Looking back, I know that Dad would have done it anyway. You wouldn't have been able to stop him."
The look on Greer's face says it all. "Believe me, if he wanted something done, he got it done. And he knew he would die. He was the most logical choice."
"Now you sound like Rush. Much prettier lookin' but still."
Chloe glares at Greer but the upturned corners of her mouth belie her action. "My father saved us, saved us all, and instead of honoring his sacrifice I went crazy. Not the best way to deal with it, huh?"
Raising both hands, palms facing outward, Greer shakes his head. "Don't look at me, Miss Armstrong, I am the last person you should ask about craziness."
His admission makes her laugh and she tries unsuccessfully to turn it into a cough. She sees the satisfied gleam in Greer's eyes and knows what he's doing. And it's working. The loss of her father will always be a black mark on her soul but...
"I can't change the past and it does me no good playing the blame-game. Dad wanted me to live and that's what I am going to do."
Filled with a new sense of determination, Chloe moves closer to the doorway, Greer right behind her, his presence strong and yet calming. Just before she steps into the room, she feels a light breeze ghosting across her head.
"I love you, kiddo..."
Goodbye, Dad.
"Colonel Young." Surprised faces greet her, a few turn away while others send her looks of pity. But not Matt and Rush. Both are surrounded by a certain air of satisfaction and Chloe swears she sees Rush nodding at Greer. Before she can think further about the implication of this, Young raises up from the chair to meet her halfway.
"Miss Armstrong?"
Her unflinching gaze meets Young's questioning one.
"When you remove my father's body from the shuttle, I want to be there."
- The End -