Title: Photos in a Frame
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst/General
Pairing(s): 1x2; 3x4; 5xS
Warning(s): a bit of language
Summary: They kept a lot of memories, and he would rather not open them again... because they are still memories, reminders of the past, and would never become reality... or maybe they would, given the sheer luck on his side.
Note: Heero POV, slight 1x2 in the end, post EW. Inspired by a line or two by the song 'Home by the Sea' by Genesis, though overall not a songfic. Just a light fic because my muse wouldn't leave me alone... and doesn't make any sense, really ==" First GW fic ever... review, please? I'm not sure I get them all in character...
Photos in a Frame
Heero stared at the pictures half-hidden by the shadows of the white horse statue, then moving into his waiting duffel bag. His hands were crossed in front of his knees, yet he still didn't move.
It was a hard decision to make, and he stood up, reaching for the photo. Its glass was dusty, but the picture inside itself felt genuinely fresh in his mind, like it was only taken yesterday. The more he stared at it, the more the dull pain inside his chest ached.
He blew the dust off and wiped the glass with his sleeve, returning the shine, albeit just a bit. Plopping back down to sit on his bed, the Japanese ran his finger on the corner of the frame, feeling the still-sharp edge.
There was nothing wrong with the frame... but the picture inside; though old and slightly dog-eared, held so much for him that he'd never say to anyone. It reminded him of the past, which he longed for yet afraid to embrace.
He was afraid of the World, yet he didn't know why.
Now all that was left was his decision to bring this photo with him or not. It was very easy to just place it back to its original place, hidden, and leave Earth into L1, where he could start an entirely new life without being haunted by the past.
But then he was reminded by something he'd once read, 'humans are formed by their past, do the present, and live for the future; so that we do not make the same mistake as the past is there to remind us, present to guide us, and future to look forward.'
Was there any foreseeable future for an ex-Gundam pilot, assassin and terrorist like him, though?
It took him about a minute or two to finally decide to open the clip that held the frames together, pulling out the yellowed paper gingerly. Heero stared at the photo that was sitting in his lap, recalling back how the hell they got this photo.
It was a few months after the Barton uprising, and the five of them had been invited to a dinner by Relena. Of course they all had agreed to come, and the dinner itself had been pleasant and comfortable. Zechs and Noin had been there, too, along with Sally and Dorothy. Hilde hadn't been able to make it though, but it was another story.
Duo, as usual, had thrown in a suggestion to get them all within a picture; and with the help of Quatre, they all managed to get a shot.
Which was this exact photo.
They were all wearing casual clothing, except for Zechs who probably wanted to be the gentleman.
Heero snorted, smirking a bit.
Wufei's expression was as stiff as usual, but there was a small shine of peace inside his black eyes. The slight upturn of his lips showed that even though he didn't like the session, the result was probably one worth keeping. Trapped between Duo and Relena, Heero had to wonder how come he wasn't caught with a scowl.
Duo was grinning and laughing at the same time, hooking an arm around his shoulder. He looked like he had nothing to care about in the World as he expressed it like that, but Heero knew better. With that joker mask and Shinigami side he wore, common people wouldn't be able to see through.
But he himself had never been a 'common', yeah? All those time they'd spent during the war, working together, allowed the Wing pilot to observe what lies behind the mask.
Quatre also joined in the laugh, although not as hard as Duo's. Beside him Trowa towered over the four teens, but still shorter than Une.
Zechs, Noin, Sally, Dorothy and Une all stood behind the five pilots and the former Queen of the World, as the photographer finally managed to click the button.
All in all, they all had the same similarity: there was a hint of peace of mind, even if just a micro-fraction of the whole.
Opening an envelope, Heero slipped the picture inside, and carefully placed it at the bottom of his duffel bag. He would keep it, the last and only reminder of his past.
Then after this he would close this section of life, and start an entirely new one on another new page. What awaited for him, he had no idea; because he sure as hell didn't really think that the five of them would survive the war.
There was no J to ask for another new mission, no friends, families nor acquaintances to guide him through because he'd cut them all off. He wanted to learn to live first, before he did something stupid like last time again, risking the others.
Slinging the duffel bag across one shoulder, Heero began to walk towards his apartment door, pausing just at the doorframe. He swept one last look of his apartment, before flicking the lights off and closed the door; along with that part of his life.
He'd left nothing behind, and he carried all the memories that he needed in that one picture.
Because he knew what he wanted, yet he was far too afraid that he might lose it again. Maybe later he would find true peace, even with these blood-tainted hands of his, and a future to chase.
It was one rainy, Friday evening, when Heero was bemusedly thinking about what to write for his new book that someone knocked on his door.
Frowning, he paused and glanced at the door. Who would visit his place in a weather like this...? Not many people knew of this place, and his neighbors certainly had more interesting things to do than to disturb a writer.
When the knocks still didn't stop, he sighed, stood up and headed for the door. Grabbing the handle and pulling it open, he greeted, "yes, how may I help you?"
The words died in his throat as the drenched figure looked up from behind his cap, and Heero found himself unable to say anything as Duo fidgeted slightly.
"Duo? What are you doing here?" The words launched automatically from his mouth before he had any chance to prevent them, and it startled his long-time comrade. This was the last thing he expected on a rainy evening, several years after he left.
"Uh," he stuttered, "was here on a Preventers business, yanno, when I accidentally spotted you - not that I intended to stalk you! - and curiosity got the better of me... so yeah, er," he grinned sheepishly, waving a hand. "I kinda followed you here."
The Japanese was still frozen in place, couldn't quite believe what his eyes was saying.
Duo frowned, and waved a hand in front of the other man's face. "Hey, Heero? You okay, man? It's - fine, if you don't want me here, I could just return back and pretend this never happened-" He stopped short when a hand clamped over his mouth.
"Stop rambling, Duo," Heero growled softly, pushing the door open a bit wider. "Get in, you're probably soaked to the bone. I'll get you some new clothes while you dry up."
When the braided man made no move, he hesitantly asked, "something wrong?"
Duo glanced up to meet Heero's blue eyes, and he could see the conflicting emotions behind clearly. "It's - you just disappeared without a trace several years ago and we were running like confused headless ducks, and now that I've found you, you act like nothing happened?"
The Japanese leaned into the wall, and intoned dryly, "I've disappeared to learn, Duo, so I wouldn't make the same mistake twice. Now," he gestured at his apartment, "would you like to come in? Or are you content enough standing there like a wet puppy?"
Slowly, that famous Maxwell grin found its place back as he followed his friend inside. "Heero Yuy, joking?" He laughed as he saw the other man smile a bit, "either I missed something as big as the galaxy or someone knocked the hell outta me that I didn't get any information."
Opening the fridge door, Heero searched for an canned coffee - Duo's favorite, he always remembered - and smiled, mostly to himself. When he brought the two drinks and set them at the table, he watched as Duo pick it up and gulped one big mouthful.
He opened his coffee, but didn't drink it yet. There was a lot that he wanted to say, but nothing was appropriate except for one.
And when Duo was finished and looked him squarely at the eyes, Heero whispered quietly with a barely visible smile, "I've missed you."
"Yeah, well," Duo wiped his nose, "we've all missed you too, you asshole. Disappeared like the Earth swallowed you - how do you think we all felt?"
"Worried as hell, I suppose," the Wing pilot answered, still with that smile, "but now that you've found me, I guess it's time that I find you guys as well."
"Uh-huh," the American agreed whole-heartedly, chucking the empty can with perfect accuracy into the trash can. "But tell me, Yuy, just why did you do that?"
Heero's smile grew a bit, and he walked around, standing directly in front of Duo. He gazed into those expectant, wide eyes, and said honestly, "because I can't stand the thought of losing you all - especially you, Duo. Figured that if I disappeared things would calm down, and our life would all be better." He paused, "and it did."
"For you and those goddamn people targeting you, yes," he grumbled, leaning closer into the Asian, "but not for us, because we almost had a panic frenzy - and definitely not me—hit the nail right on the spot, 'Ro." And he closed the distance between them as he claimed Heero's lips.
Heero smiled into the kiss, and opened his hands to embrace Duo. Yes, he'd started on a new life, a life that none of his friends knew about. With only a picture that stored all his past, he hadn't really thought that it was possible for memories to change into reality...
But between the increasingly-heated kiss of the two former pilots, really, he couldn't care less.
As they lay there, side by side, Heero stared at the ceiling for a moment, before climbing down his bed, careful not to wake his lover up. He went down and rummaged through the space below his bed, and dragged out an old duffel bag.
His hand immediately went down to the bottom, and he pulled out the same envelope that he had never touched again ever since that day.
The picture slipped out, and as he held it towards the crackling fire, he noticed something different in the eyes of his young self.
Love.
It took him an ungodly amount of time to realize what it had been, and when he had, he was overwhelmed by it. Initially he was afraid, because he received no such training to handle feelings like love.
He was scowling, yes, but if looked more closely then there were lots of subtle details that were in the picture.
Then he felt an arm circling around his neck, and Duo's sleepy voice greeted him. "You still keepin' that photo, 'Ro?" It was husky and croaked out, and Heero smiled.
"The only reminder of my past that I took along with me." He said nothing more as he followed the braided man back into the bed. "They're the past, I'm here in the present now, and I'd like to think that there's a tomorrow worth chasing."
"Corny talk for the Perfect Soldier, yanno," Duo joked, and fell asleep again not long after.
Heero himself was content enough to let Maxwell slip back to Morpheus' realms first, because right now, he could join him as easily as pulling a trigger back when they were still Gundam pilots.
How a simple, old photo could retain so many memories, he didn't know. But he was certainly glad that he'd decided to bring it along; as it helped him get through his new life sometimes.
And the fact that those memories would become a reality? Now that was something he could be looking forward to.