Leave Out All The Rest
Disclaimer: I do not own Linkin Park or Supernatural
Artist: Linkin Park
CD: minutes to Midnight
"Dean?" Sam mumbled as he walked along the deserted road. He had turned away for just a second. All he had to do was make a phone call, check up on his friends...and when he turned back...Dean was missing. The Impala was abandoned, his door hung open. There were no signs of struggle, there were no cries for help...he was just gone. Dean was just gone, just missing.
"Sam, where are you going? I'm right here." Dean spoke calmly as he watched his brother walk right past him.
"Dean!!" Sam called again, his face drawn in worry as he ran along the road. His eyes burning with sorrow as he looked around at the black nothingness around them. "Dean!! Where are you?!"
"Sammy? Sam I'm here." Dean ran up to Sam and reached out to touch his shoulder only for Sam to move away.
Sam pulled out his phone, his fingers battling to keep steady as he dialed. Setting the small device to his ear he held back tears. "Ellen!?" Sam's voice was laced with such worry, such fear. "Ellen! Please, tell me that Dean's contacted you!"
"Sam what are you doing I'm right here!" Reaching out Dean grasped Sam's hand...only for his own to flow right through it. He could hear Ellen on the other line, he could hear her speaking.
"Sam, I know you're heartbroken about Dean's death...but please...you have to let this go. You can't keep thinking that Dean is just missing. He's gone Sam, we cremated his remains last week. Please let this go, please." A click came from the phone and then a broken connection. It was so cold...so harsh...
"What? No...no...Sam I'm here, I really am. I'm right in front of you." Dean reached out for Sam only to fall through him as his brother turned and walked through his body. He watched as Sam walked back to the Impala and pulled open the glove compartment. His fingers reaching in as he pulled out a thin piece of paper, folded in half. Dean watched carefully as Sam looked down to the paper and covered his mouth with a fisted hand. His eyes watering as tears fell freely down his pale face. "Sammy..." Dean walked closer in an attempt to comfort his brother. His fingers nearly reaching Sam when he looked to the paper.
On the front was a picture of Dean, a more recent one. Right under it was a small caption. "In memory of Dean Winchester, 1978-2008". As the small book was opened Dean peered in and noticed names of people he all knew...people he loved. There was an actual funeral for him. Sam had pulled together all their money to make it for Dean...and Dean just left him alone...left him to cry out what little heart he had left. "Sammy...I'm not dead...I'm not going to die I'm going to stay here with you Sammy...I'm not leaving until you're ready too." Feeling his heart flutter Dean almost buckled under his own weight when Sam looked up at him.
"Dean...wake up."
XxXxXx
Shooting his eye open Dean looked to Sam who was lying over top of his bed, his hand on Dean's chest as he lightly shook him. "It's about time you woke up, I was worried I'd have to drag you into the Impala still dead asleep. C'mon...get up." Patting Dean lightly on the chest Sam stood from leaning over the bed and grabbed the duffle bag filled with weapons taking it outside to the Impala.
-----
I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared
After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here?
So if you're asking me I want you to know...
-----
The Impala roared down the stretch of highway as Dean stared at the black asphalt before him. Sam sat in the passengers side typing away diligently at his computer, Dean figured he was looking for a way to save him; good luck. "Whatcha doing Sammy?" Dean finally spoke to break the silence.
Sam looked up from his computer and over to Dean. "Just surfing the net for a hunt."
"Uh huh." Dean chewed the corner of his lip. "Stop trying to look for a way to get me out of the deal?"
Sam's fingers suddenly stopped as he looked over to Dean. "Why?"
"Just wonderin'..." Dean could feel Sam's eyes on him as he stared straight ahead.
"No...I'm still going to keep trying."
"...I figured..." Dean mumbled calmly. He could see Sam's eyes widen from the corner of his own. "...what?"
"You're not going to fight with me."
"No."
"But...you always fought with me about this."
"Yeah...I know."
"So what changed?"
"...Listen Sam...I'm not going to tell you what to do. I don't want you to screw around with this deal but no matter what I say you're going to do it anyways...I could yell at you...I could threaten you...hell I could tie you up and throw away any means of resource...but it won't stop you...I know it won't..."
"Why are you saying this?"
"...Sam...when I die."
"IF you die."
"..." Dean turned his eyes to Sam's face. "WHEN I die...I want you to hold on to the memories...don't forget me."
"What? What...what do you mean? You know I won't. Dean...what's going on with you, man?"
"I realized...I don't have anything left behind for you Sam...there's no niece or nephew...no sister-in-law...no parents...there will be no siblings...hell not even a damn pet...I just...I want you to know...that if I had the chance...I would have done something to leave a piece of me behind with you...something for you to remember me by."
-----
When my time comes,
Forget the wrong that I've done,
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memories
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest...
-----
The time between the two brother seemed to fly, month after month slowly started to slip away and Sam grew more frustrated with each second that slipped by. He had pissed around too long and now Dean had a week left...one week...one damn week! Hooking his fingers on the underside of his laptop he stood from the bed he sat on and chucked it as hard as his body would let him. The laptop smashed hard against the wall and broke into tiny pieces. Sam had failed, he had failed his brother and his punishment was losing him.
The smash was enough to startle Dean awake as he nearly flipped out of bed, the blade stowed safely under his pillow was grasped tightly in hand as he looked about for an intruder...but he only found Sam. Relaxing he walked towards Sam and looked to the smashed up laptop. His eyes going to Sam's face as his brother glared at the pieces as if their demise would be his reward. "Sam...what the hell!?" Dean barked, the cold gaze turning at him. Dean felt his spine shiver at Sam's hard gaze, though his tough act suddenly took a nose dive as Sam's scowl turned into a whimpering fest. His arm immediately slipped around his brother. "It's okay Sammy...it'll be fine...don't be scared..."
"Don't be scared! Dean! I'm going to lose you...in a week! That's seven days!! You're going to disappear...you're going to die! There's no bringing you back!!"
"I know Sam. I know you're upset and I'm sure if things were reversed I would be just as pissed...but they're not...so you need to snap out of this and be strong!"
"How can you tell me to be strong Dean!?"
"Because I can't..." Sam fell silent as he looked to Dean's face. "I put on this face...I put it on for you Sam...I don't want you to know that I'm weak...that I'm afraid...of everything. I'm afraid of waking up to another hideous face, I'm afraid that you'll leave in the night, I'm afraid that I'll lose you or Ellen or Bobby or Jo...I'm afraid of so many things but I never want to show them...but this time Sam...I need you to be strong for me...because when I die...you will need all the strength you can get. The last thing I want to see is you coming into hell right behind me..."
-----
Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shared what I made
I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you
So if you're asking me I want you to know...
-----
What more could Sam do for Dean? They were down to the last hour, they stood just outside the graveyard in which their mother and father's headstones sat. Dean...he wouldn't step anywhere near the gravestone...and now...now he planning on spending his last few minutes there. The Impala's engine still rumbled beneath them as they were both a top it's hood. Dean's head was down as he stared at the hood between his legs. Sam's eyes never left the road ahead of him. "It's almost time..." Dean finally spoke as he slipped from the hood of the Impala.
"I know..." Sam breathed softly, he was trying to be strong, he hadn't shed a tear since Dean and his talk a week ago.
"Sam...thanks." This caught Sam's attention as he looked towards Dean. "...thanks...for trying to save me...for being there and fighting with me to keep on living...and I know time and time again I said I was tired...but if I had to...I'd do this all over again...when the gin granted that wish for me...I couldn't believe how much you hated me...we didn't talk outside holidays...we didn't do anything that brothers should have...and...Sammy...I would watch mom burn up all over again if it meant we'd be close like this." Grasping Sam's shoulder Dean's clenched his hands no him. "I love you Sammy..."
-----
When my time comes,
Forget the wrong that I've done,
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memories
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest...
-----
There was no blood...there was no screaming...there was no pain for Dean...he just closed his eyes...and fell asleep, Sam right there at his side, his own head resting on Dean's. He remembered when they were kids...how he always did this with Dean...how this was his protection from the bad dreams. Thump...Dean's heart had started to slow...Sam stayed glued to his side. Thump...it grew faint, his breathing slowing. Thump...the last beat...that last indication that Dean was anywhere near consciousness...and then it fell silent...his warm body slowly growing cold as he became limp. There was no life...there was no more essence...Dean was gone...he was dead...and Sam was alone...He was left alone.
He couldn't leave, he couldn't let go of Dean...he tried so hard not to cry. He couldn't hold it in anymore, his tears continued to flow. They stained Dean's shirt and wet the ground beneath him, Sam felt so alone, so lost. His mom was gone, his dad was gone, jess was gone, Madison...and now Dean...he was the sole surviving Winchester...but he couldn't stand to be alone. He could feel it aching at his chest. He could feel a pull of deep regret and sorrow.
Dean said he wasn't strong, he said he wasn't able to hold on. That Sam was better than him and will always be better and that he wished he could be Sam but he just couldn't open up...he couldn't show who he really was.
-----
Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well
Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
-----
"I'm not strong either Dean..." Sam whispered as he slammed his foot onto the accelerator of the Impala. "I can't live without my family!! I just can't do it and I need you to know that...I'm coming after you Dean...I'd rather spend hell knowing you were near then here without you!" The Impala zoomed to a full 150 km/h as Sam raced into the nearest town...Lawrence. he could see the flashing lights of the cops behind him, he could hear the sirens as he clenched his eyes and only went faster, they came up close on his tail. "No, I can't stop I can't I can't..." Sam shook his head as tears continuously flowed from his eyes.
He could see it...it was coming in sight. The house...the house where everything started. The Impala crashed through the front window.
-----
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
-----
"Today, we mourn the loss of two young men...Dean and Samuel Winchester. The last surviving blood line. They were loved by all around them and had done many great deeds. We bid farewell to these young men as they ascend into heaven. They will surely be missed.
-----
Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well
Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are
The End