Don't own them, have no affiliation with them whatsoever, although I sure wish I was Gibbs' 4th and current wife!

Title: Couchemar

Classification: A/U, Drama, H/C, Angst

Spoilers: Bete Noire, Minor spoilers for My Other Left Foot, The Immortals, and Marine Down.
Rating: PG

Warnings: Character Death

Summary: Set immediately after SWAT team comes into Autopsy on Bete Noire. The aftermath of the hostage situation is worse than anyone could have anticipated.

"He's coming around. Agent Gibbs, can you hear me?"

The silver-haired man on the stretcher stirred again, then opened his eyes. The face of the dark-haired EMT leaning over him broke into a smile. "Welcome back."

Gibbs tried to sit up, but the sharp pain in his shoulder made him cry out.

"Easy." The young paramedic put a hand on his arm. "Don't try and move too much. That bullet did a number on your shoulder. You've also got a nice gash on your head from where you hit the floor. Just relax." Gibbs tried to say something, but the oxygen mask blocked that idea. "My name is Dominique – I'm an EMT."

Gibbs pulled off the mask. "The hostages," he gasped out. Quickly Dominique pushed the mask back on.

"Don't try and talk."

Gibbs reached to pull the mask off again. "Are they okay?"

"Agent Gibbs," Dominique started to say. Gibbs moved his gaze past her shoulder, trying to see the rest of the room. People were milling around, making it hard to tell what was going on. Then someone moved and Gibbs caught sight of Gerald lying on the autopsy table, his body covered by a sheet.

Gibbs turned disbelieving eyes back to Dominique. "I'm sorry," she whispered. He bit his lip.

"Kate? Ducky?" The squeeze on his arm was answer enough. Gibbs closed his eyes, fighting back tears as Dominique gently replaced the oxygen mask.

"You got the terrorist though," Dominique said softly. "And he's going to live to stand trial."

Gibbs found himself unable to breathe, despite the oxygen going through his system. The bitter memory of his words to the terrorist flashed through his mind. "You failed."

No, Gibbs thought. I failed.

The first thing Gibbs saw when he woke up in the recovery room was Abby, sitting in a chair next to his bed, leaning against the pillow. From the look on her face, she'd cried herself to sleep.

Gibbs attempted to touch her arm in a gesture of comfort, but his arm was immobilized in a sling against his body. She'd been unable to sit on his other side because of the medical equipment.

Just then Abby jerked awake. Immediately, her eyes went to Gibbs' face and promptly filled with tears. "You're awake," she whispered. Gibbs tried to smile at her, hs mouth to dry to try and talk.

"Here." Abby grabbed a cup of ice chips from the table and gently placed one on his tongue. The cold felt good against the ache in his throat left by the anaesthetic.

"What happened?" Gibbs asked softly after the ice chip had melted.

"He shot them all in the head, probably after the second phone call," Abby answered, tears trickling down her cheeks.

Gibbs closed his eyes in frustration. "Bastard."

"That's not all." Abby's voice was barely audible. "He had an accomplice in Receiving.

Gibbs felt sick. "Tony?" he whispered.

Abby shook her head, her eyes shut tightly. "In surgery – a few hours ago." Her shoulders shook with sobs. "I never took the evidence down, Gibbs!"

"Oh, Abby." Gibbs held his good arm out. "Come here." Abby came forward and he wrapped her in a one-handed hug, letting her cry on his good shoulder.

It was about ten minutes later when a gentle voice said, "Agent Gibbs?"

Abby stood up, startled. The doctor, a young woman with short brown hair and hazel eyes stood at the foot of the bed.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but you've got a phone call, from Germany."

She placed the phone on the bed and handed Gibbs the receiver. "Hello?"

"Jethro!" the heavily accented voice came through the receiver. "I just got the news a few minutes ago. How are you doing?"

"I-I'm okay, Mirela," Gibbs answered.

"All flights are grounded right now because of a blizzard, but as soon as it lifts I'll be on my way back to the States."

"Mirela, no – it's your team's first international."

"Alexandru is here. I want to be there for you – like you were for me."

Gibbs' eyes moistened. "Thank you," he managed to say. He clapped his good hand to his forehead. "Erin. I'll…um…"

"It is okay. I have taken care of it – the pastor and his wife." She paused. "Listen, I have to go – but I'll be there soon. You-you take care. Love you."

Tears were threatening to spill over. "You too," Gibbs whispered. "You too."

After Gibbs had been settled into ICU, Dr. Kulikowski asked Abby to excuse them for a minute. When she was gone, the doctor looked at Gibbs.

"Agent Gibbs, I realize this is a difficult time for you, but there are some things we need to go over in regards to your injury."

Gibbs nodded. "I understand."

"First of all, how much do you already know about what happened to you?"

"That I was shot by the same terrorist who killed my friends and colleagues. Gibbs' voice was bitter.

"The bullet tore through your left rotator cuff," Dr. Kulikowski said quietly. "We were able to reattach the muscles and tendons in surgery, and with physiotherapy you'll be able to recover ninety-percent mobility. You'll probably have arthritis there early, but overall you'll be able to live a normal life."

Gibbs drew a deep breath. "You said ninety-percent of mobility."

The doctor nodded. "I'm afraid you won't be able to return to your previous career or any similar position in law enforcement." She sighed. "I'm sorry, Agent Gibbs."

Gibbs drew another deep breath. "So am I."

The memorial service for Kate, Tony, Ducky, and Gerald was held a week later. Gibbs sat with Abby and Stan Burley as various NCIS personnel spoke words about the four deceased. Stan was one of the speakers who got up and said a few words, eyes glistening.

"It seems strange standing up here and telling stories about Ducky, when anyone who met him knew him as a story-teller." There was a murmur of laughter. "I worked my first case with Ducky seven years ago. A JAG lawyer – stabbed to death on a street in Georgetown. I had to go down with Special Agent Gibbs and hear Ducky's report on the Autopsy."

Stan shook his head. "Now I should mention that in school I was one of those students who'd take notes word for word on what my teachers said. Not point form either. Full sentences." He started laughing. "So there I am, taking notes in Autopsy, and Ducky starts off on one of his stories about a case he'd worked in Malaysia I think it was. And the whole time I was trying to figure out the tie-in between his story and our case. Well I wrote down that entire story, word for word. And you know what? There was a link. The murder victim in Malaysia and our JAG lawyer both had the first name 'Neville.'"

Laughter erupted through the Church and even Gibbs found himself chuckling. "That was Ducky for you," Stan said, smiling fondly. "But Ducky's story still helped us find the killer, because it reminded him of another case, where a killer had hid in plain sight at a crime scene, by disguising himself as one of the crime scene investigators. And it turned out our JAG lawyer's killer had done the same thing. If it hadn't been for Ducky, we never would have caught the killer."

Stan spoke for a few more minutes and then it was Gibbs' turn. Shakily, and with his good hand gripping the lectern in front of him, Gibbs faced the NCIS personnel gathered.

"I had the privilege of knowing and working directly with Tony DiNozzo during the last two years of his life," Gibbs said, struggling to keep his voice steady. "We met when we shared a joint investigation in Baltimore. A Naval aviator and his civilian girlfriend were killed in a carjacking; Agent DiNozzo was the homicide cop in charge of the scene."

Gibbs shook his head, tears welling up in his eyes. "Tony could be a skirt-chasing, motormouth pain in the six, but he would never let a friend or coworker down, no matter what. On one case we worked together, his instincts helped us find an accomplice who was hiding in the home of the murderer when we arrested her. At the time we had not been aware of the accomplice's involvement. It's possible the accomplice would have gone free if not for Tony's instincts that there was someone else in the house."

Gibbs took a deep breath. "As most of you know, Agent Kate Todd used to be with the Secret Service. Let me be the first to say that even for the short time I knew her, the Secret Service's loss was NCIS' gain.

"Kate was always able to look at cases with a unique perspective. On one of her first assignments with NCIS, her quick thinking saved the life of the skipper on the USS Foster. She was persistent, hard-working, and one of the bravest agents I've ever had the pleasure to work with."

A sad smile crossed his face. "I worked my first case with Ducky eight years ago. He was a valued coworker and, more importantly, a good friend. I could talk to him about anything. He was there for me during some of the hardest times of my life, like a second father." Gibbs' voice grew husky. "I can't imagine NCIS without him.

To be continued…