Author's Note: Yes, this is the long ass story I worked on for National Novel Writing Month last year :) It's officially finished as of a few weeks ago, but I was busy arguing with myself whether I should post this or not. And since I'm posting it, that means I won! HA! Well anyway, This is a story between Naruto and Sasuke's POV's but Naruto's actually dating Gaara, you'll find that out yourselves anyway, just thought I'd clear the air as to why Gaara isn't a POV in this series.
In this particular novel, we focus more on Naruto, just to clear the air on that a little bit also.
Publishing on this story, will be once a week on Sunday. I have it set in my calendar to make sure I publish the chapters beyond this and not let any of my readers down!
I hope you all enjoy, this took me two and a half months to complete :) R + R + F if you like, criticism and comments are especially welcome because I'm going to do major editing on this and publish it in the future! :D
Chapter 1
Naruto
Hell, that's the exact word I could describe my life I have with my father. Fuck, the drunkard would probably save his money to send me out somewhere to live if he didn't spend it all on booze. Why he hated me so, and why he drank so much, was beyond me. But one things' for sure, he blamed me for something. One time, in his drunken sleep, I heard him mutter how I'm the reason Mom isn't here anymore, how I'm the one that killed her.
That's how I learned that he's blaming me for Mom's untimely death of giving birth to me.
From people around me, I heard that my father was a genius, a prodigy and could have become the leader of our small, but growing village. But also, from what I heard, he gave up once Mom died. It was like all his ambition and his will died when she did. Now, from experience, all that was left was anger, depression, fear and loneliness.
Once, I tried to talk to my father about it, because I wanted to tell him how alone I was too, but all I got was a death glare and an hour long beating. His slurred speech telling me that I had no right to ask him about Mom. It was the first of many beatings after that, and they've been happening for the last nine years. Beatings were numb to me now since my body can take them.
It's not healthy mourning the death of someone for so long, and if I remember correctly, he's been mourning over Mom for fourteen years.
That's why I've been led to talk to the principal of my high school; Tsunade, who is also a psychologist and works at the hospital when school is let out. She's a world wide known healer, and the best one at that. So that's why I've skipped most of my first period class to talk to her, who seems to have been in her office arguing with her secretary and long friend and student, Shizune, about her drinking habits.
"Tsunade, Naruto is outside in the office waiting for you. He's not leaving for class unless he talks to you. He says it's important." Shizune's soft, caring voice echoed from the room. I'm going to have to get her something for troubling her like this when I see her again.
"Then send the gaki in!" Tsunade's booming voice echoed louder than Shizune's and left my ears ringing. Damn, this woman had a set of lungs on her.
That's when the door opened and Shizune rushed out, heaving for air with her long argument with the woman and sighed when she saw me.
"I swear, we need a sound proof office for her" Shizune teased, "and you can go on in, just don't take too long okay? You have class."
"Yea, thanks a lot Shizune-chan." I smiled, standing up and slung my book bag over my shoulder and walked around the desk and into Tsunade's office, closing the door behind me and taking a seat in one of the two chairs in front of her desk.
"What is it gaki?" Tsunade asked, her blonde hair getting in her flushed face as she hiccupped a few times. Man, baa-chan looked so hilarious when she was drunk.
"Yea … Tsunade-baa-chan … it's about my … my Dad …" I hesitated, at first, wondering if I should have just let the issue go, but then me thinking about getting the help my father really needed, the two of us could be living happier. I want him to be happy.
"So what's wrong with Minato that had you come to me?" Tsunade asked, somehow interested.
"Well, um, you know how he likes drinking. I think he goes to some of the bars with you after hours … but, that's all he does anymore. I don't think he's had a job in the last two years. He's become more depressed and I'm afraid he's going to do something to hurt himself." I said, not making eye contact because I knew that she'd be giving me a worried look.
"Is he beating you, Naruto?" She asked, and she was serious.
"N-No." I said, probably too quickly.
"I'm asking, because you look like you have a sore shoulder. You never carry your backpack on one shoulder." She said. Great.
"No, baa-chan, I got hurt during a work out." I said, which wasn't all a lie. My shoulder had been hurting before Dad decided to take a crowbar to me last night because I decided it was smart for me to hide his booze from him before he got home from one of the many bars he had been to yesterday.
"Okay." She sighed a moment later, her eyes prying into me like daggers until they softened some.
"Will you be able to help my Dad?" I asked, hoping I'd have a good answer.
"I think I will. I'll mention it to him, but ultimately, it is his choice if he wants help or not. And from what you're telling me, he needs AA and some serious down time with a psychologist and some anti-depressants." She said, listing off the things that needed to be done to help my father. And I was glad with the answer I was given. "It will be a long and hard road, but you'll have to be there every step of the way."
"Hai, baa-chan." I smiled widely. "I will."
"Good, now go see Shizune for a note and get to class, you're way past the first bell." Tsunade smiled as I stood up.
"Thanks baa-chan." I said, happily leaving her office for once and Shizune had a note prepared already and I grabbed it from her as I walked by. "Thanks Shizune-chan."
"No problem Naruto." She smiled as I left the main office and rushed towards my first period English class with Iruka. All the pain in my left shoulder somehow dissipating, but I knew if I did anything, I'd regret it.
"Okay, class, I hope you all did your homework. Each of you had to find a book and read at least the first five chapters and write two to three paragraphs about what you read so far." I heard Iruka say voice said over the chat of the class. He had probably noticed I wasn't there and for some odd reason, it sounds like he waited to start class as long as he could. Probably waiting for me, I hope not.
But as I opened the door, everyone's eyes fell on me and they were all daggers. What the hell did I do now?
"Naruto, why are you late?" Iruka asked, his eyes daggers, but not in the bad way.
"I was talking to Tsunade-baa-chan about something." I said, handing him the slip Shizune gave me and went and took my seat in the back next to a pair of tired looking Shikamaru and Kiba.
"Don't call the principal that, and thank you for the slip." Iruka sighed as he threw the white piece of paper away into the trash and went back to what he was saying.
"What took you so long dork?" Kiba's tired voice yawned in my direction as he sat up a bit and rested his elbows on the desk, using his hand to prop up his head.
"I was getting advice about something, nothing you two need to know." I huffed and crossed my arms.
"I hope, again, that you all picked a book for your book report that's due at the end of the quarter." Iruka's voice said, and that's when I tensed in my chair … I forgot to get a book last night before going home.
"What's wrong?" Shikamaru asked.
"I forgot to get a book last night." I whispered, and apparently, I wasn't whispering low enough because somehow, Iruka heard me.
"Naruto, front of the class." He sighed heavily. I could tell he was disappointed already.
Sighing, I got up and went to the front of the class with my head down.
"Go to the library and get a book, quickly, here's a pass. You're far behind and I expect you to have that assignment first thing in the morning. This is the only time I'm letting you get a pass at this. Next time, I won't be so forgiving." Iruka said, handing me a pass and I couldn't help but smile.
"Yes, sure thing Iruka-sensei." I nodded quickly and left. To be honest, I had no idea what book I was going to choose at all.
When I got to the library, there was already a class in here. I'm guessing it's most likely the Psychology class. I have it too, so now that I know I'm going to be in here later, I can come back if I don't find a book now. But knowing Iruka, he'd want me to do what I came here to do; find a book and get back to class. And looking at the clock, I didn't have much time before the bell rang, and I left my stuff in Iruka's classroom.
So, I hurriedly went to the shelves, ignoring the other students as I went through and decided hell with it and chose a book called Impulse, by Ellen Hopkins.
The book looked thick, but when I looked through the pages, they didn't have much on them, then I realized that the entire thing was written in something like poetry … and second guessed reading it, but reading the summary, made me want to read it. So, I shrugged my shoulders and put my heart into this book and decided to get it. What harm will it be if I read it? Right?
Feeling like I accomplished something, I left the row of books whilst reading it at the same time and bumped into someone.
"Sorry, I didn't realize you were there." I said, picking up the book I dropped and looked up to see that it was none other than Ibiki-sensei, and I wanted to go and hide.
"I hope you have a pass to be here, Uzumaki." Ibiki said, though from my own experience, he wasn't as threatening as he really was, unless he was in a bad mood.
"Yes, I have a pass." I said, pulling it out of my pocket and showed him, my hands shaky a little bit.
"Thanks, now hurry up, the bell rings in five minutes." Ibiki said, handing it back to me and I nodded, quickly going up to the desk and signed the book out before rushing back to class. Praying that Ibiki wasn't going to be in a bad mood when I had him in four periods.
Realizing that I was running, I slowed my steps into a fast walking pace so I wouldn't get in trouble for running indoors, and finally made it into the classroom just before the bell rang and rushed over to my desk to get my backpack. I had art class next, so it was just upstairs. I could take my time a little bit to get there.
"Hey, Naruto, did you chose a book?" Iruka asked from his desk. It seems he had the classroom reading the entire time I was gone. He looked bored out of his mind.
"Yea, Iruka-sensei." I nodded as I walked up to him, backpack slung over my right shoulder and book in my free arm.
"Impulse? I never heard of that book. And it looks thick. Do you think you'll have it read in time?" Iruka asked.
"Yea, I think I will." I nodded.
"Okay, now get to class." Iruka smiled, the next class' students already filing into the room, so I had at most two minutes to get to class out of the four we were already given.
By the time lunch time rolled around, I was completely exhausted and I could tell my shoulder wasn't doing any better. As of last period, my shoulder wouldn't stop grinding when I tried to move it, and I couldn't help but realize that my shoulder seemed out of place somehow. I guess my shoulder had more damage as I thought, I couldn't even lift an empty lunch tray with it when I went to get my lunch, so I sighed heavily and decided to skip lunch today and went to sit in my usual place; by the window where no one could bother me.
"Hey, Naru, is everything okay?" A familiar voice asked, making my spirits go up, but only a little bit when I saw a familiar flash of red hair before someone sat next to me, thank God, on my good side.
I couldn't help but smile when he sat next to me.
"Hey Gaara." I said and I let him hug me, forcing myself not to wince or tense when he touched my bad shoulder, though I knew I failed when I heard a low growl escape from his throat.
"What happened to your arm?" He asked, and I should have known from the very beginning that I couldn't hide anything from him.
"Well … there's two different stories to how my shoulder got hurt …" I said, not a single lie escaping my lips as I told him. Yes, Gaara knew everything, and how abusive my father could be.
"I have time, and you have to explain why you didn't meet me at your locker this morning anyway." Gaara said, and I gulped, how could I have forgotten!? Oh, that's right, I decided enough was enough with my father last night.
"I'm sorry, I thought I told you … I went to talk to Tsunade-baa-chan about getting my Dad some help." I said, and I could feel him tense even more when I mentioned my Dad.
"I honestly don't see why you think he deserves a second chance with you Naru." He sighed, but relaxed after a moment or so.
"Well, he is my Dad after all." I shrugged, sighing heavily.
"Now, what happened to your arm?" Fuck …
"Well, I did hurt it lifting weights yesterday before going home … after seeing you of course, but … my … Dad, uhm … went after me last night with a crow bar." I said, barely giving voice to the end of my explanation, so half of me prayed he didn't hear it.
"He … did … what?" I heard him growl.
"I hid his booze." I said, looking down at the table and sighed heavily. "I know, he doesn't deserve the second chance I'm giving him … but he's the only family I have."
"I know Naru, but you know Tsunade's going to find out what really happened to your shoulder eventually."
"She even asked me what happened to my shoulder, I obviously told her half the truth and lied to her when she asked if my Dad was abusing me …" I said, now wishing I shouldn't.
"Why did you lie about that!" He wanted to yell, but thank God that he kept his voice low.
"Because I'll be taken away from everything, I'll never see you again if that happens." I said, and now the tears were starting to fall. A second later, I could feel Gaara pulling me closer to him as he hugged me, it felt good knowing I had someone to go to and for someone to comfort me when I needed it. "I don't know what I'd do if you were taken away from me."
"Shh, it's all going to be okay, and no one is going to take you away from me. I'll make sure that never happens, okay?" Gaara whispered into my ear. "You just need to be more careful around your father when he's drunk, okay?"
"I promise." I nodded with a small smile. This was just what I needed to hear.
"Hey, Naruto, what are you doing after school?" A whiny voice asked, that belonged to none other than Kiba, who was all ready to go home so he could play with his huge ass dog and ignore his homework.
"I'm going home to do my homework, that's what I'm doing." I sighed. School might have already been out for the last ten minutes, and waiting for our rides to get here was a pain in the ass. Though I personally knew that my father wasn't going to be here to pick me up. If I was lucky, he wasn't home and at a bar somewhere in town getting his ass drunk. But he could also be home sleeping off yesterday. I prayed it wasn't the latter.
"You're such a dunce, maybe you should hang out with that jerk Sasuke. He thinks he's better than everyone." Kiba snorted. "You'd fit in perfectly with him."
"Take that back Kiba! I'm not a jerk like him!" I hissed. "I just don't want my grades to fall, that's all."
"Yea, sure, since when did you care about your grades?" Kiba asked, and that was a really good question.
When in the hell did I care about my grades?
"I don't know what you're talking about." I huffed, starting my walk home and wished that Kiba didn't follow.
"Whatever dunce!" Kiba yelled behind me.
I knew he was mad at me for not stopping by to see his dog, hell, I haven't seen that mangy mutt since it was still a puppy. Why was he making a huge ass fuss over something as trivial as that? I don't have a single, fucking clue.
But anyway, I wanted to take the long way home. At least if Dad was still home, he might be getting ready to leave and was about to. So if luck was on my side, at least he'd be leaving when I got there.
"So, Dad, will you hate me after this?" I asked to myself, a question that I wanted to ask my father many times when I thought about getting him help for his growing problems. But somehow, I knew the answer wasn't going to be a good one. "How can I be stupid, you already hate me."
I sighed heavily as I walked the streets, turning whichever way I needed to go until they led me home, only to find a car parked in the drive way and a looming doom over my head.
"I hope he hasn't talked to Tsunade-ba-chan already." I sighed, prayed, wished, hoped.
I wanted my feet to turn me the other way so I could walk longer, wait until he left, but they betrayed me and led me straight through our front yard that looked neglected and needed a good watering and a mow, but Dad never taught me how to run the mower, if we even had one, and he wouldn't do it himself. Hasn't in the last few years, and straight up the front steps and into the house, braced for whatever object that could and would be thrown at my head the moment I walked in.
But, surprisingly, nothing came, and there was no sign of life in the house at all. Maybe Dad was still sleeping, so I tiptoed inside and quietly closed the door. I'd say that I was home, but knowing me and my big mouth, it'd be too loud and would wake Dad up. And that's the last thing I needed right now.
I quietly made my way to my room and closed that door quietly too before throwing myself onto my bed, wincing when my shoulder throbbed a bit.
A nap was calling for me, but I knew that if I fell asleep now, I'd never get my homework done, and I had a shit load of it to do. English was going to take me forever, there weren't real chapters in this book, and I realized that there's at least three to four different point of views in it, so I decided that at least one point of view per character was a chapter, so I was going to need to read a lot in order to get the so called five chapters in. Psychology was going to be the hardest, I'd use my laptop, but my father doesn't know I own one. The library was five miles away from here, and I don't feel like walking there this late knowing it'd close in four to five hours, so I'd have to get a pass to go there during study hall once again to get it done. Math was the hardest subject for me, but at least I got it done with the help from Sakura. Art class was also done, we only had to do a self portrait of what you'd be in the future, and that was done in class. But if I were to look at it now, I'd want to add some stuff to it.
"Naruto!" Came my Dad's booming voice through the house, and I could tell, he wasn't very happy, and the fact that the front door slammed, meant that he hadn't been home at all. Which reminded me, he had his keys taken from him the other night, so he had been walking to his bars if he didn't get a ride from Tsunade or Shikamaru's and Chouji's dads.
Quickly, I got up off my bed and rushed to my bedroom door and threw it open, standing in the doorway when I saw my Dad standing in front of me. Yea, he looked pissed.
"What in the hell did you tell Tsunade?" He barked in my face, making me step back because the smell of his breath was overpowering with alcohol, and it made me want to get sick.
"I didn't tell her much, just that I thought you could use some help." I squeaked, damn it all, I hated it when my voice squeaked like a girl.
"Help in what? My drinking?" He yelled, his right foot raising as he kicked me hard in the stomach. Making me take a few steps back and fall to the ground on my ass. I wished that I didn't land on the corner of my dresser, that was going to leave a nasty bruise later on.
"Help in everything." I finally screamed, and that's when Dad stopped in his tracks. I didn't have to look up at him to know that he was staring at me with wide eyes. "You're always hurting, and I would have asked for help a long time ago if I could have just had enough courage to do so. I know you hate me, and I don't care, but you're my father and I love you. I just wanted to help you be happy again."
I didn't know I had started crying until I felt the tears fall on my hands that were resting on my knees. But I knew Dad hadn't moved except to lower his arms that I have no doubt were ready to slam me with another one of his precise aims with whatever he was holding.
"Can't I be the inspiration you need, Dad?" I asked, finally looking up to see that Dad had actually fallen to his knees and, for some reason, looked defeated. But I think my words were finally starting to sink in. This wasn't the first time that I told him all of this.
"Naruto …" Dad mumbled, at first I didn't know what was going to happen, but I never expected my Dad could move so fast, especially since he wasn't as sober as I would like him to be.
But, what shocked me the most as I shielded myself for whatever was coming to me, I felt him wrap his arms around me into the first hug I ever got from him, and he was sobbing onto my bad shoulder, but I didn't care.
"I'm sorry." Dad kept repeating and I managed to slide my arms out from between us and hugged him back. I didn't know if I should do anything else, but I let him hug me and cry on my shoulder as long as he wanted. It was sometimes better to let it all out than stop half way.
"It's okay Dad." I mumbled, hoping he heard me.
To be honest, I don't know how long we had been sitting in my room, hugging each other. It might have been a couple of hours, because from where I could see, it was starting to get dark, and Dad had been quiet for the last hour or so. I was starting to think he fell asleep on me when I started moving to get him off my bad shoulder.
"I'm going to go see Tsunade, I'll probably be out until really late …" Dad said as he started taking his weight off of me. I didn't realize until then how much my back hurt. I must have been leaning against the corner and didn't know it.
"Here, I'll help you up." Dad said once he was on his feet, holding out both hands, and I took them happily, letting him pull me to my feet and I winced at the strain on my back. "And maybe you should come with me and have her look at your back."
"Naah, I'm fine otoo-san, you go and talk with her. I'll be okay. It's probably just a bruise." I said, scratching the back of my head like I usually do when I'm nervous.
"Okay, I'll see you later." Dad said, and when he smiled, it was genuine, and I couldn't help but smile back.
Finally, some things around here were going to change.