Red on White
A/N: My first story for Undertale, the only game I will ever write fanfic for. I'm not a gamer in the least, but the world of Undertale won me over completely. The story is wonderful and emotional, and the characters are amazing too. Not to mention it's riddled with the darkness I crave so much – you just need to know where to look.
Because I'm a writer of fanfic, I like to explore and flesh out my plot bunnies and usually torture myself (and my readers) with plenty of feels. I hope you enjoy this one.
Also, Frisk is female here because I interpret the character as such.
Meanwhile, many thanks to the lovely Julie Tulips for all her help with the puns.
For my own reference: 13th fanfiction, 1st story for Undertale.
::
I.
The light crunch of little footsteps on the snow-covered earth. The rustling of movement in the bushes. Papyrus became aware of the child watching him at about the same time it stepped out from its hiding place. It had been watching him for some time; children tend to gravitate towards each other, and once it got over being frightened of him it decided he would make a suitable playmate.
Papyrus stared at the child in disbelief as it emerged, because he had never seen one of its kind before and had always thought he never would. He studied it closely with the blunt curiosity of childhood. The child stood on two legs and was taller than he was. It wore clothes that were pink and frilly and it had a small, smooth face. Its brown eyes studied him with the same curiosity. At last it cocked its head to one side and stated, "You're funny."
Papyrus did not really know how to respond to such a statement until the child added, "And I'm not scared of you, by the way, 'cause I'm big."
"I'm big, too!" Papyrus announced, proudly. "I'm FIVE!"
"Big deal," the child scoffed. "I'm seven."
Papyrus stared in astonishment and respect. "Wowie! I didn't think there was ANYONE bigger than me except Sans. He's 14."
The child scowled in the presence of such ignorance. "There's loads of grown-ups bigger than us, stupid – bigger than me, even. That's why we're kids."
"Oh! My friend Undyne calls me that all the time!" Papyrus brightened at the familiarity. Then he studied the child more closely. "Are you REALLY a human?"
"Uh-huh."
"Then if you're a human, I'm going to capture you!" Papyrus announced, finally remembering what you were supposed to do if you found one.
The child wrinkled its little nose. "You mean like tag?"
Papyrus considered this. "Yeah, I guess!"
"Then… okay." A grin spread over its face. "But I bet you can't catch me!" The next thing the young skeleton knew, it was gone in a twirl and a giggle. Papyrus chased after it, following the sounds of its shrieking laughs. Friendship with Undyne had made him quick on his feet, and it wasn't too long before he found the human, stopping for breath behind a large shrub. He tapped it on the shoulder, beaming victoriously, and it laughed.
They ran and played until the child began to complain of the cold. It hopped lightly from foot to foot and began to pout spectacularly. Papyrus brought it inside his house, where it sat down cross-legged on the floor and warmed up by the small stove, rubbing its hands together. Meanwhile Papyrus sprinted to the small side corridor Sans' room was located in, and promptly pounded on his brother's door. Sans answered, looking down at Papyrus, who was bouncing on his heels.
"'Sup, bro?"
Papyrus tugged impatiently on the cuff of Sans' sleeve. "SANS! Come and see what I found!"
Sans raised his free arm in surrender. "Oh… kay. What is it?"
"Come and SEE!" Papyrus' voice pitched into a whine.
"But what is it?"
"I can't tell you, you have to come see!" Papyrus yanked his brother down the corridor into the front room, where the human child was sitting and waiting. It did not seem upset in the least, and was amusing itself by drawing pictures with its finger in the dust. Papyrus stopped and pointed dramatically. "It's a human!" he announced, rather unnecessarily.
"Oh. Yep. I can see that."
Money's so short. That was the first thought that came to Sans' mind.
The reward must be huge was the second.
It's my duty.
That was his third.
"Papyrus," said Sans slowly, "why don't you and the human sit and talk while I, um, head to Grillby's and bring you a couple of hot chocolates?"
The human seemed to perk up at this idea, while Papyrus tugged again on Sans' sleeve. "But Sans," he whispered – or tried to: Papyrus' whispering voice was similar to the average person's normal speaking tone. "Sans, can we AFFORD it?"
"Yeah," said Sans, grinning and stuffing his hands into pockets. "Yeah, sure we can."
"Wowie! Okay, then!" Papyrus tugged the human over to the sofa and settled down. "Come on, human! My brother Sans is going to get us hot chocolates!" Both children jumped then – the door had slammed shut with Sans' leaving.
Papyrus crossed his legs and played with his toes. Then he looked sidelong at the human. "I did a GREAT job of catching you, huh?"
The human shrugged. "You're fast," it admitted.
Papyrus beamed. "I AM, aren't I? That's 'cause I'M going to be in the Royal Guard with Undyne when I grow up!"
"I'm going to a barrelina when I grow up."
Papyrus didn't know what a barrelina was. "Human," he asked suddenly, as the thought struck him, "are you my FRIEND?"
The child shrugged again. "I guess, yeah."
"Wowie! I only have one of those!" Sans came in the door then, holding two hot chocolates in disposable cups. Papyrus stood up on the sofa. "SANS! Sans, guess what! The human is my FRIEND!"
"Yeah? That's great, bro," the older monster muttered. He seemed impatient. "OK, drink these up and then it's time for bed."
The protest was immediate. "But SANS – "
"Bed."
Papyrus crossed his arms over his ribs and scowled. "I don't want to."
"Come on. I'll read you your favourite bedtime story." Sans sort of thrust the cup at his brother.
Papyrus relented, taking his hot chocolate. "But – where will the human sleep?"
"Um." Sans looked over at the child. It wasn't paying attention to them in the least, but was instead now busying itself by counting the marshmallows in its cup. He wondered if he would have enough to pay the rent for the next couple of months. "The human can sleep at the inn, can't they? I'll show them the way. Go on, finish up so you can put your PJs on."
::
Later, Sans leaned over the icy water of the river, scrubbing at his hands and the cuffs of his coat, trying to remove the bloodstains. From the corner of his eye he saw the familiar cloaked figure of the River Person, perched on its boat. From the shadowy, faceless form Sans could feel a pair of eyes, piercing him judgmentally. He hunched his shoulders, trying to avoid the gaze and scrubbed harder. Somehow he could feel the icy bite of the half-frozen river despite his inability to sense the cold.
A voice carried over to him, light, airy, nonchalant. "Tra la la. Not as easy as it looks, is it?"
.
II.
"Check it out."
Sans dropped the sachet of gold onto the table. It produced, simultaneously, a satisfying chink and thud.
The younger skeleton looked up at his brother in amazement. "How much is IN there, Sans?"
"5,000G," Sans replied seriously.
"WOWIE!" Papyrus clapped his hands over his cheekbones. "That's - that's enough for… how much, Sans?"
"It's a lot," Sans confirmed.
Papyrus eyed the sack of gold. "But where did you get it?"
"Just did a little, eh, job for the king."
Papyrus pulled himself onto the table, feet swinging. "Sans," he asked suddenly, "where's the human?"
"Oh," said Sans, "they left."
"Left for WHERE, Sans? I want to PLAY with it."
"They went home." Sans scooped his younger brother up and placed him back on the ground. "Why don't you play here on your own for a bit while I go to Grillby's for a pick-up?"
"But I don't LIKE his food."
At Papyrus' scowl, Sans chuckled and rubbed the top of his skull. "Don't worry, bonehead; Grillbz will make you some spaghetti. He always does."
Papyrus sulked but nodded his assent.
Sans had thought this was to be the end of it, but he was wrong. The questions persisted, and Sans hadn't the heart to tell Papyrus the fate his little human friend had met, not even the important purpose she'd served. He was relieved that he'd had the mind to dump the human's extra things – its tutu and its shoes – in a hiding place in Waterfall, where he hoped Papyrus would never find them. In hindsight, Waterfall hadn't been the best place to hide the human's stuff, seeing as Papyrus played around there with that Undyne girl. Little fireball, that one. But he'd been lazy. Rushing through the task to bring home the gold.
But Sans had time on his side. His brother was young still, young enough to forget. A few weeks and Papyrus would remember nothing. Children's minds were so malleable.
In the meantime, though, Sans dealt with his brother's questions with ever-thinning patience. He snapped at him one time, which made Papyrus cry, which made Sans feel guilty, and subsequently led to his buying Papyrus a heaping bowl of compensation spaghetti.
"Sans," asked Papyrus one night in an unusually quiet voice, "is the human ever coming back? I hope it's okay."
"I told you," replied Sans tiredly, "they're gone. Drink your milk."
That was the last time Papyrus asked after the human. Perhaps he'd realised that he'd never get a straight answer from Sans, or perhaps he'd assumed his brother just didn't know, but either way the human was never mentioned again.
And Papyrus grew up. He and Undyne played all sorts of games as they grew – Monsters and Humans, Capture the Human, Kill the Human, Kill the Human with a Spear (Papyrus usually got stuck playing the human) – and somewhere along the line Sans supposed his brother must have forgotten.
It was for the better.
.
III.
17 years later
If there was one thing living on the surface proved, it was that human children were just as capable of producing noise as monster children – perhaps more so. And coming from Sans, who had raised Papyrus from toddlerhood, that was saying something.
It was Friday afternoon, and Frisk had wanted to go the park, with her Auntie Alphys to supervise her. As soon as Frisk had expressed her wish, Papyrus had insisted on coming too, which meant that Sans had to come along to supervise him. And that was how Sans found himself, on a day that he really didn't feel up to it, sitting on the park bench of an overly noisy playground with the ex-royal scientist as she read Japanese comics as he supervised his brother and adopted niece. He could see Frisk on the merry-go-round with a small group of other children. Papyrus was pumping, sending it spinning at a slightly concerning speed, but, Sans reasoned, it could have been worse – after all, Undyne could have been pumping the merry-go-round. What counted was that Frisk was plainly enjoying herself, and it seemed the other children were, too. There were seven of them all, and the small group were shrieking and laughing together while clinging on for dear life.
It astonished Sans sometimes. That Frisk, a child of just eight, could have taken almost her entire journey through the Underground, with all those countless near-death experiences, with such a sombre, stoic, collected approach (except for that one time Mettaton made her cry). That a child of eight could have freed the monsters of the Underground, risking her own life so significantly; could have acted so entirely selflessly as to have taken on the responsibility of Human-Monster Ambassador without thinking twice. What was more astonishing still was that that same child could play and behave as others of her kind, and fit in seamlessly, as if there were nothing remarkable or special about her at all.
And, Sans reflected grimly, that same child… that he would have… without a second thought…
He'd been thinking about that a lot lately.
He realised that Alphys had put her manga down and was watching him, questioningly.
He couldn't decide if he cared or not.
Papyrus appeared suddenly, breaking Sans from his reverie. "SANS," the younger skeleton proclaimed loudly, "THE TINY HUMAN HAS REQUESTED AN ICE CREAM. I AM GOING TO TAKE IT TO THE NEAREST SHOP."
Frisk tugged impatiently on his scarf. "Come on, Uncle Papyrus," she said insistently, "before all the chocolate fudge is gone."
"Better hurry, then, before you're too choco-late," said Sans, forcing a grin.
"That one was good; you should tell that one to my mum," Frisk stated matter-of-factly, as Papyrus exclaimed, "SANS! STOP IT WITH THE PUNS!"
"Okay, okay," Sans waved them on. "If you don't find me humerus."
"SANS!"
Frisk tugged on Papyrus' scarf again, and this time succeeded in tugging him away towards the street.
Hollowly, Sans watched them go.
"I could have killed her," he said. He hadn't meant to say it aloud.
"W-what?" Alphys, wide-eyed, turned to face him.
Sans started at the sound of her voice, looking over at her, then returned to staring, half-blankly, out at the ruckus of the playground. "Alphys," said Sans, "tibia honest, pretty much everyone who Frisk now calls family tried to kill her at some point." It was an old pun, one he'd used countless times before.
He gave a snort, a smirk.
Alphys didn't fall for it.
"Y-you didn't mean it like that," she replied, and if Alphys was fighting back, arguing, then Sans knew he'd really screwed up, had really alarmed her. "And besides, you – you're the only one of us who didn't try to hurt her – e-even indirectly."
Sans clenched his fists. "Do you know what the reward was for presenting the King with a human, Alphys?" He said it smoothly, enough so that he was frightening himself. When she didn't answer right away, he continued, "5,000G. 4,000 if you didn't kill it yourself, though; if you didn't want to do the dirty work." A beat. "Welp. I didn't mind."
Alphys looked nervous – more so than usual, anyway. "Sans," she said, and her voice was wavering as she spoke, "what – what are you talking about?"
"Toriel. Before I met her properly, face-to-face I mean, Toriel asked me to protect any human that passed through the door to the Ruins. And it wasn't a promise I wanted to make, 'specially not to someone I didn't even know the name of at that point. But I made the promise anyway, because there was something special about her, the woman behind the door. And then, then Frisk went through the door, and if it hadn't been for that promise I made to Toriel, then believe me, Alphys – and we both know Frisk's a tough kid – she wouldn't have made it past the gate into Snowdin." He turned on Alphys then. "And it wouldn't have bothered me in the least."
There was no answer for a very long stretch of time. Alphys was chewing on one claw. "But – you didn't hurt Frisk," she finally said, giggling nervously. "E-even Papyrus attacked her, even if he didn't really know what he was doing. And… " – another nervous little laugh – " … you know Frisk. Forgave everyone in a heartbeat. She's a great kid… "
"Alphys. Listen. One of the kids, one of the first kids that fell down before. I killed them." Alphys' expression was blank, and this frustrated Sans immensely. "Alphys. Do you get it? Don't you get what the hell I'm saying?" She didn't reply and he sighed, exasperated. "Listen, Alphys –"
"I know how you feel," the ex-royal scientist interrupted, her voice scarcely more than a whisper, "but… it's not so bad. Not – not compared to- to what I – " Too late, she caught herself, clapping a hand over her mouth.
"Compared to what you did, you mean?" Sans snorted bitterly. Alphys' eyes widened, frightened. "I know about the Amalgamates. But nobody told me, so don't worry. Nobody betrayed or anything. Don't ask how I know. I just… do. I'm me." He tried to let some reassurance slide into his voice, but to no avail. Every word came out as tired, dull, monotonous.
Alphys chewed at her lip. "I – I don't – "
"Alphys. What I did, I did in cold blood. And I can never atone for it."
Rough scales against the bones of hands. Sans froze, glancing down briefly at his hands in his lap. Alphys' small, yellow-scaled hands had closed around his, their touch more gentle than he deserved. Quickly he looked up again, but it was to meet Alphys' eyes, red-rimmed and shimmering with the start of tears behind her glasses. Before he could register this fully, she had pulled him into embrace. Sans stiffened, then found that, half-against his will, he was returning the hug, and all he could think was how little he deserved it all.
"At least you only hurt one person," she whispered, her nose buried into his shoulder.
Sans grit his teeth. "But it took me all these years to feel guilty for it."
From across the playground, a shout of joy. Frisk was bounding towards them, her round little face alight with a victorious grin. Swiftly, Alphys let go of Sans, and then they just were sitting side-by-side again. Alphys returned to her manga, any signs of the fact that she'd just been crying completely gone, her tears expertly hidden. Sans supposed she must have been good at that by now.
"Look, Dunkle Sans!" crowed Frisk as she reached them. "Uncle Papyrus let me have three scoops!" She stuck her towering ice cream cone in his face, then showed it to Alphys. "Auntie Alphys, look! You're not looking!"
"Chill out, kid," said Sans, spreading his own face into a grin, "it's just an ice cream."
Frisk pulled a face. "That wasn't as good as your last one," she informed him, then frowned. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," said Sans, maintaining his forced grin. "Go enjoy your ice cream. Where's Papyrus?"
"On the swings." Frisk plopped down, of all places, right between her adoptive aunt and uncle. She licked her treat contentedly, feet swinging, her carefree innocence rolling off her like an overwhelming smell.
In these moments, Sans felt he could have choked on it.
He looked back down at his hands. Then he frowned. Covering the phalanges there he thought he could see small, blood-red marks, dry and crusty with time.
"Are you sure you're all right, Dunkle Sans?" Frisk was studying him with suspicion.
Sans glanced down again. The marks were gone. "Nothing, kiddo," he muttered, ruffling her hair. "Just a trick of the light… "
END.