Prologue
Starting Life in Another World with a Useless Goddess
...
When Satou Kazuma had pushed the girl away from the path of an incoming truck, he felt satisfied.
His life could only be summed up in a single word: meaningless. He was a shut-in NEET who only knew how to play games and nothing else. His grades back in school were average at best, and he didn't have any kind of talent worth bragging or even mentioning about. Everyday was exclusively spent on gaming, never doing anything remotely productive except to restock his food cache by going to the nearby store; it was a total waste of his parent's money, and he could rightfully be considered as a useless individual.
So when he saw a girl was about to be hit by a speeding truck as he was walking home after buying a newly released online game, he didn't think twice about saving her life even if it would take his own.
At least, he did something worthwhile for once in his 17 years of his existence, dying heroically to preserve the future of another person. Of course, he would have wished to have survive given how badly he wanted to play that brand new MMORPG game he had bought before seeing the girl was in danger, but he guessed that's not possible anymore; the last thing he had seen was a large shadow coming for him. And he could only smile sadly at his approaching death.
Perhaps, people would think differently of him once they learned how he sacrificed his own life to save another. His family would be weeping at his grave in grief, and the girl would cry as she recounted the tale of his heroic deed. His friends, few as they were, would remember him as someone who was selfless, probably even convincing their school to create a memorial plaque for him to set as an example to the students. It was a heartwarming thought, and as death slowly took him in her cold embrace, his soul was surprisingly at peace.
...and then this stupid, useless self-proclaimed goddess had to ruin everything.
He couldn't believe at first when he suddenly appeared in a space blanketed in darkness with an office desk and a chair in front of him. He couldn't also believe when a girl seemingly his age arrived to announce that she was a goddess and he was in the boundary of life and death, which was her domain. He definitely did not believe her when she told him what happened and how he actually died.
The truck, which was really just a farm tractor, stopped in its tracks before it could even make contact. The girl was okay, albeit with a fractured leg from hitting the ground hard after he had pushed(read: saved) her. While he, on the other hand, had suffered what was probably the most embarassing death in the history of mankind.
His heart had stopped due to absolute fear, and he died... by shock.
...no.
Just no.
HELL NO!
"I don't believe you!" he all but screamed at the now laughing goddess. It was not possible! She was simply lying to make fun of him. There's just no way his death was something like that!
"Oh, but it's true!" The goddess, named Aqua probably for her obsession with anything blue as could be seen on her hair, eyes and clothes, nodded. "You died of shock! In fact, when your parents saw your face... your expression... it's..."
And then she finally doubled over on her desk, erupting in never-ending fits of glee. Her shoulders shook as she cackled, and Satou Kazuma was forced to watch in despair while a goddess made fun of his death without an inch of remorse and compassion.
Seriously, she was supposed to be a goddess?!
She was beautiful, he had to admit. With long silky smooth blue hair flowing behind her and a face much more glamorous than the pop idols on television. Aqua was certainly a goddess as she had said, there was no doubt about that.
Except that she didn't behave like one at all.
"Oh, I'm sorry!" she lifted her head and wiped a tear, still giggling. "It's just that I've been doing this job for more than a century now, and you are the first one I've met whose death was not only pointless but funny as well!"
Then she threw her head back and burst into laughter once more, pounding the table with both of her fists like an immature child.
There was a rule that says a man must never hurt a woman, but Kazuma was starting to have the urge to break that. It took all of his control not to strangle the girl right there and then, barely managing to hold himself. It seemed his emotions were still in him despite being a spirit, though he didn't know for how long he could rein them before he finally snap and lunge at the stupid goddess.
"Could you please stop laughing already?"
His voice must have carried enough harshness to affect Aqua, and her giggling fits gradually subsided. Regaining her composure, which was not much considering her previous state, she straightened up in her seat and regarded Kazuma with an amused expression.
"So, Satou Kazuma," she steepled her fingers in a professional manner and smirked. "What should I do with you?"
Kazuma scowled slightly at her different demeanor. Now Aqua was acting all high and mighty, gazing at him as if he were nothing. Sure, he was just a human and she was a goddess. But he had this feeling that he was much better than a goddess who makes fun of people's death.
"You could stop this stupidity and let me on my way to wherever you wished to send me," he crossed his arms and stared defiantly at her. He was not going to bow down to this obnoxious bitch!
The blue-haired girl hummed as if considering his words. "Do you know that we have a rule?" she smiled. "If a useless person dies in a heroic fashion, he or she will get two choices on how to continue in the afterlife."
Kazuma immediately perked up at that despite the fact that she just called him useless.
"What choices?" he said slowly, narrowing his eyes in suspicion. He didn't want to believe her, really. But his desire to live once again was seemingly greater than his urge to strangle Aqua for her insults on him. There were a lot of things he still wished to do in life, and everything about his untimely death was starting to become a bother - especially this goddess.
"Well," Aqua began, "supposedly you would have been sent to Hell for being a useless, shut-in NEET. But..." Kazuma's eyebrows twitched in annoyance, but he let the insult passed.
"But?" he questioned when the goddess briefly stopped.
"Well, you died heroically," Aqua said simply with a hint of disappointment.
Kazuma blinked. "So?"
"A person who died that way are automatically sent to Heaven," she answered.
He tried to processed what she said. So he was going to Heaven? He had heard a few things about that place where people who had done good deeds were supposed to end up in death, but he didn't payed much attention to it. Now that he was actually dead, he could finally discover what was so great abo-
"But I would advise against heading there," Aqua suddenly added.
Kazuma did a double take at that. A goddess was telling him not to go to Heaven? The hell?!
"W-Why?"
"Well, it's simple. Really," the goddess sighed and leaned back on her seat, placing both of her legs on top of the desk in a lazy fashion. "For one, there's nothing in there except an endless field of grass."
Kazuma gaped. "A-An endless field of grass?" he stuttered in disbelief. Dying heroically would just land him in that kind of place?!
"Mmmm," the blue-haired goddess nodded. "All you can do is spend eternity with your dead ancestors basking in sunlight under an oak tree."
No way, he thought. Everyone that dies were supposed to experience such a boring life? But they said Heaven was a paradise! His whole life was a fucking lie!
"There's no television, no internet," Aqua continued, a smile slowly forming on her lips. "Not even a radio or any appliances."
Then her voice dropped into a low whisper as her hand slowly caressed her right thigh. "And since you don't have a physical body, you can't do something... sexual."
She said this with a large smirk while briefly sliding her hand up along with the skirt, giving him a teasing view of what lay underneath.
It was honestly a very horrible attempt at seduction, and he couldn't help but feel sorry for the goddess. Her job must've been that hard to prevent her from doing anything lewd even to her body. Then again, who would want to bang a bitch like her? He doubt if a brothel would accept such an employee.
"So what's the other option?" he crossed his arms and stared at her impassively.
Aqua frowned, a hint of disappointment crossing her face. "The second choice would be to have you reborn in a new life on another world, complete with your body and memories intact."
"A new life... on another world?" his eyes widened. The implication of what that entailed was not lost on him. It was every person's dream... no, their wish to have a second shot at everything. All the regrets they had, the unfinished business and unfulfilled goals, anyone would want to undo those things. Thus, to be granted another chance was a great boon.
And if he was fortunate enough to be blessed with that...
"What's the catch?"
There had to be one, of course. There's always one. An exchange, a price. It may seemed too cliché and predictable, but he had read enough manga and watched a lot of animes to know where this was heading. No doubt, Aqua would give him an impossible task in exchange of another life. Perhaps to slay the Demon King? Or maybe save a kingdom from a terrifying monster?
Sure enough, Aqua replied in an instant.
"You have to defeat the Witch."
"The 'Witch'?" Kazuma repeated slowly.
"Yes," the blue haired goddess nodded. "The Witch. That world is terrorized by a powerful one, and all those who died refused to be reborn. Naturally, we have to do something before it starts losing a lot of people and become a dead place. And what better way to do it than have someone from another world be reincarnated in there?"
Despite the rather sloppy immigration policy, it actually made a lot of sense. If that world's population was on the verge of declining since no one wanted to live there anymore, choosing a person from another world to replace those who had departed for the afterlife seemed like a good idea. Plus, with their memories and current body intact, they could provide a readily available defense against the Witch.
In all honest, it sounded similar to the narrative of most video games he had played. And he knew without a doubt that that world was the right one for someone like him.
"Well, have you decided then?" Aqua inquired in a bored tone. "I'm quite busy so choose quickly."
Drawing a deep breathe, Kazuma quickly nodded and without hesitation answered.
"I've decided. I'll choose the second option!"
The goddess sighed, muttering to herself. "Finally." Then with an obviously fake smile, she stood up and clapped her hands together.
"Very well, Satou Kazuma. Let us begin."
Their surroundings suddenly changed. Rows upon rows of racks and shelves dominated the area bearing countless weapons and items of all shapes and sizes. In front of Kazuma a table appeared, and sitting on it were stacks of papers with pictures and strange names printed.
"What's this?" he looked around in bewilderment. He had the nagging feeling that he knew where this was heading; almost all the games he had played had this exact scene happening to the playable character.
As if reading his thoughts, Aqua answered. "Why, these are the weapons, items and skills you have been granted the privelege to choose from before you get reborn, of course!"
Kazuma's jaw almost connected to the non-existent floor. A weapon and skill selection sequence? They do this kind of thing here?
"You mean I could take these with me?" he croaked, voice thick with emotion.
The blue-haired goddess frowned. "Well, not all of them. You can only take one skill and one weapon or item of your choosing with you. So pick very carefully."
The shut-in NEET looked around once more. There were so many he didn't know what to choose. He knew he should be an expert given the hundreds of RPGs he had finished, but he didn't realized how difficult it would be in reality.
He slowly aporoached a nearby rack laden with an assortment of blades and swords. They seemed good and exceptional, from what he was seeing at least, crafted with perfection and elegance in mind, some more than others. On each of their hilt a large price tag hung, but instead of displaying an actual sum, it showed the name of the weapon and a short description for it.
Kazuma picked a random one, hefting it and testing the weight and feel on his hands. It was a long sword with a golden crossguard and blue hilt, a line of strange runes running down on the blade's gleaming surface.
'Excalibur, The Sword of Promised Victory' it says on the tag. A holy sword created by Faeries for the 'Once and Future King' of Britain.
He placed it back on the rack. Apparently, it releases a powerful blast capable of destroying a city. But the charge time was somewhat slow, and he would need both hands to wield it. Not to mention, he was not a king the last time he checked.
He moved on to the next, a blade shaped in the form of a key with a gold handle.
'Keyblade, The Key To Unlock Hearts'.
Kazuma blinked once. Then twice. Then thrice before immediately rejecting it. Never mind the absurd design, he would look ridiculous brandishing that kind of weapon. It didn't even looked like it could defeat a wolf!
The third one made him paused: it was a huge sword. And when he said huge, he meant a huge ass single-edge gigantic weapon at least a foot longer than him. The color was grey, a bit lighter on the bladed edge, with two holes bored on the cross-guard and a leather-wrapped red hilt.
He tried to pull it. Really hard. But soon gave up after a few seconds. It was obvious he wouldn't be able to make it budge an inch, much less properly use it. It would take a strong warrior to do that. Maybe even a soldier or some kind of enhanced human.
The next few minutes went by quickly. He checked each weapon, testing their usefulness and reading what they were supposed to do and the ability they possessed. None of them matched his standards. Most were either too large to carry, or too light, or too long. And a lot were outright useless in a fight.
The same could be said for the non-combat items: potions, accessories and random trinkets. He couldn't find any use for them, not even in a general application. It suddenly made him wonder why the gods would bother giving dead people something like this when it was all basically useless.
The 17-year-old finally sighed and glanced around. What should he do? This was supposed to be where he would choose how his character growth would play out, but he couldn't decide how. Or maybe he was doing this the wrong way?
Kazuma looked back at the table filled with papers, skills that he could take with him on another world. Perhaps he should start there? He probably needed some kind of ability that would allow him to use the weapons and items in here. Weapon Proficiency or Item Mastery or something like that.
He approached and picked a skill sheet. 'Supersonic Speed: Mach 20' was written on the paper. Useful in many situations, but what was he supposed to do, run around the enemy all the time?
He put it away and chose another one, 'Super Strength: One Punch Knockout'. It would grant him an absurdly near-omnipotent strength, and he could practically defeat any opponent without too much of an effort... no, not possible. The skill was just too damn overpowered.
"Hurry up, will you?" Aqua stomped her foot while he browsed through the rest of the selection. "I still have a lot of souls to guide through!"
"If you're not going to help me then just shut up," Kazuma snapped and glanced briefly in the goddess' direction to see her munching on a bag of chips and glaring at him.
With a sigh, he returned his attention on the table. Despite the fact that the abilities were interesting, they were too damn broken for practical use. He didn't want to be some kind of Gary Stu overpowered character that could plow his way through any trials. He may be a NEET, but he wanted himself to grow naturally too like every human being.
He suddenly frowned, having forgotten one important aspect that could influence his decision on what weapon or item and a skill to bring. And he berated himself for not asking sooner.
"Hey, you. Could you tell me more about the world you would send me into?"
It was a simple question, but one that was essential. Depending on the answer he would have to choose something that would enable him to adapt easily to the environment as well as slay the Witch.
"It's Lady Aqua," the blue-haired girl corrected with another fake smile. "And to answer your question, it is a fantasy world very much like the ones you shut-in virgin otakus always love."
"So there is magic?" he asked with a hint of excitement.
"Obviously," Aqua rolled her azure eyes. "It got demihumans, bloodthirsty monsters and other typical fantasy elements you can find in most video games and mangas."
Kazuma mulled over the information. If what she said was true, then he should have a skill that would increase his chance of survival. He didn't know what kind of other enemies he would face, and it's better that he was well-prepared for any situations.
He browsed through the selection once again, not bothering to hide his displeasure over the choices. Learning magic was a mandatory objective for anyone in his position, so he definitely needed to pick an appropriate skill for that. But then so was weapons handling; a hero would not survive in a hostile environment without the knowledge to fight.
So which one would it be? A Warrior-class or a Mage? Sword or Staff? Weapon or Magic?
He thought for a moment. It was hard to pick one over the other. If he neglect magic he would be vulnerable to wizards and mystical creatures. Likewise, he would not stand long against a powerful knight if he chose the path of the arcane arts.
Suddenly, Aqua spoke.
"Oh, come on!" she drawled from her seating, watching with a bored expression while eating potato chips. "Just choose any skill in there! They are all the same, anyway."
The teenager ignored her, focusing instead on the papers in front of him. He was just about to select that Arcane Mastery skill allowing him to channel all kinds of elements effectively when something caught his attention.
'Return By Death: allows the user to revive on a save point after dying'.
His eyebrows rose as he picked up the sheet. A Respawning spell? Something that would ressurect him when he died. He could see a lot of usefulness for this ability, but the general idea seemed not so good. For one, he was not expecting to die anytime soon.
For another, he didn't want to entertain the notion of dying repeatedly.
He set it aside, leaving it for later. He might choose it when all other options were exhauated, but not for now. Besides, there's bound to be some skill much better than that.
"You know, that power would certainly fit you."
At that comment, Kazuma quickly glanced up.
"Why?"
'Well," the goddess' lips twitched. "you're practically useless and dumb. You'll just die over and over given how you wouldn't know how to survive being a NEET and all that. Plus, that skill is technically for a cheater. And we all know that cheaters are always stupid."
There was a moment of utter silence. And then Aqua burst into laughter. A never-ending hysterical fits of mirth that left Kazuma staring at her with half-lidded eyes.
For the second time since he died, he wanted to strangle the bitch, ethics be damned.
"Say that again?" his voice was unusually quiet.
Aqua immediately stopped, blinking like an owl. Then she smiled.
"I said you're practically useless and dumb. You'll just die over and over given how you wouldn't know how to survive being a NEET and all that. Plus, that skill is technically for a cheater. And we all know that cheaters are always stupid."
Word for word she repeated her previous insult, almost as if she was intentionally mocking him. And indeed she was from the way her lips quirked. A goddess was mocking him. Really bad. Acting cocky just because she was a little bit cute.
Needless to say, that finally sent him over the edge.
"You pathetic, obnoxious, lazy goddess! I'm not a NEET! I died outside my house so I'm not a shut-in NEET!" he yelled. Then his voice dropped into a low growl.
"'Hurry up and decide', huh? If that's how you want to play then I'll play along. I could bring an item of my choosing to this parallel world, right? Well then," Kazuma pointed at her and shouted with all his might.
"I pick you!"
There was a moment of silence while Aqua had a stupid expression on her face, munching on a chip. It was enough to convince Kazuma that the goddess had the IQ of a bird, and he couldn't believe she was supposed to guide the dead to Heaven, Hell, or give them a second chance to live.
"Very well," she stood up and sighed, "don't move away from the magic cir—"
Seven seconds, give or take a few. That's how long it took her to realized what had just happened. And it slowly reflected on her face as her eyes widened in shock.
"W-What did you just say?!"
As if on cue, two glowing circles materialized, one for each them, and Aqua squealed in terror at the sight of her own. At the same time another one appeared above their head, and a voice spoke clearly.
"We have heard your request. Well then, I will be taking over from here."
A figure descened, clad in a pink dress with pure white wings spread wide on her back—an angel. And one that was a little less beautiful than Aqua, but still gorgeous nonetheless. She has short blonde hair, and her face was like that of a supermodel.
"Mister Satou Kazuma's wish complies with the regulations and has been accepted," she said in a melodious tone.
"W-Wait! This has to be some sort of mistake!" Aqua shrieked in horror even as the magic circle glowed brighter. "Taking a goddess with you is against the rules!"
"Have a safe trip, Lady Aqua," the angel bowed seemingly ignoring her desperate plea. To the side, Kazuma broke into a diabolic grin.
"So how does it feel to be dragged along with someone you treated like a total idiot?"
"No! Wait! This must be illegal! It has to be illegal!" she pounded her fists at the barrier that had already enclosed the circle.
As if not hearing her, the other girl continued. "Should you defeat the Witch, we will send someone to pick you up. In the meantime, I will handle the tasks you will leave behind."
"But that's my problem!" Aqua paled and yelled in panic. "I may be a goddess but I can only do healing magic! I don't possess the appropriate combat skills to defeat the Witch!"
Ignoring her completely now, the angel turned to Kazuma with a warm smile.
"Satou Kazuma, you will shortly be transported into another world and begin your second chance at life as a candidate to defeat the Witch. Should you successfully do so, a reward from the gods will be waiting for you."
He gulped and repeated what she said. "A reward?"
"Yes," the angel nodded and beamed. "A just reward for a savior of the world. You shall be given a wish that will grant anything you want."
"That's my line!" Aqua wailed as she began to levitate in the air.
"A wish..."
Kazuma could barely control his emotions. If that was true then he could ask for practically anything! Perhaps if he got tired of that world, he could wish to be sent back to Japan as a billionaire surrounded by sexy girls and playing games all day. Even such an impossible dream could be finally turned into reality!
And as an added bonus, he would get to order around a goddess who had humiliated him so much.
"Hey, you!" the NEET faced her, his grin widening. "I chose to bring you along with me. So use your powers as a goddess to make my life easy!"
He burst into a mad cackle like a deranged person, watching Aqua screamed in horror. Ah, revenge was indeed totally sweet!
"No! I don't want to be with a man like this!"
The two were soon lifted in the air as a swirling multicolered portal appeared behind them. A strong wind began to suck everything in the room, pulling inward any objects within reach, including the stack of papers possessing the skills everyone was required to bring one.
"Brave hero!" the angel spread her arms and wings wide. "I pray that among the other prospective heroes, you will be the one to defeat the evil Witch!"
"Now, go forth on your journey!"
With that last declaration, a screaming goddess and a laughing human were finally whisked away toward the blinding light.
Not for the first time in his life did Satou Kazuma noticed that his life sucked.
First, he was not born with any talent at all, preventing him from pursuing a career he would like. Thus, his teenaged years were spent on nothing but gaming alone, essentially making him a parasite to the community and his whole family.
Second, he had died thinking he had saved someone, a girl at that, only to learn that he had actually did more harm than good. Not to mention, his death was embarassing as hell.
Third, he was mocked and humiliated by a goddess in the afterlife, something he had never imagined in all his years to happen. Now, his view and opinion on deities and Heaven in general were at an all-time low.
And lastly, he realized how awful of a choice he made when he picked the aforementioned goddess as the item to bring, who did nothing remotely productive except to cry and wallow in self-pity ever since they had arrived in that place.
He sighed and inspected their surroundings. It was another world, alright. One that was in a fantasy setting with medieval styled buildings. The avenues were wide enough for lizard-drawn carriages to traverse, though the sheer amount of them caused a lot of traffic, and the brick road extended in both directions as far as the eyes could see. In the distance, the landscape rose into a large hill where a magnificent palace stood overlooking the whole city.
There were plenty of humans and demihumans milling around doing their businesses; common citizens, dragon men, humanoid cats and dogs, and other varieties he could not bother naming of. The streets were lined with an assortment of stalls selling various products, mostly food and vegetables. Meanwhile, local guards patrolled the area armed with swords and halberds.
Beside him, the sobbing goddess known as Aqua continued to sob while sitting on the sidewalk.
"Will you please stop crying already?" Kazuma snapped irritably. "People might think you are crazy or something and I'm related to you. Don't be noisy! Besides, shouldn't you be giving me some kind of starter equipment now that I'm finally in this world? Look at me! I'm wearing a full set of gym clothes! The usual thing to do is-"
He was suddenly cut off when Aqua grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him violently, her wails rivaling a banshee.
"It's your fault! It's all your fault! Because of you I'm stuck in here with no way back! And I can only return after I defeat the Witch! Now what should I do?"
She was in total mess. Her once smooth hair was now in shambles from her constant pulling on them in distress, and her face was streaked with tears.
"Whoa, calm down, okay?" he pried the girl away. "Look, I'm sorry for all this. And I'll do something about our equipment. For now, we should start gathering information in a bar. That's the standard in role-playing games."
Aqua stared at him skeptically. "How can you be so reliable? You're just a shut-in NEET," she sniffed and wiped away her tears with both hands.
"Never underestimate us NEETs," the teenager snorted before standing up. "First things first though, we should ask around where we could find a temporary job."
Of course, that was only natural. They came into this world empty-handed save for the clothes they wore, so it was reasonable enough to find something that could support them. A way to earn money until they could formulate a more solid plan on how to proceed.
The thing was, Kazuma was not totally devoid of items. During the time they were being sucked into the portal, a single sheet of paper flew past and made its way to the other side. He refused to believe it at first when he saw it, but he realized it might be meant for him after seeing the paper sitting beside him.
After all, having a 'Return By Death' skill could be invaluable against the Witch, right?
Aqua stood up as well, dusting herself off and fishing something from her pocket. "Actually, we don't have to worry about money. I got something we could sell."
With a triumphant smirk she pulled a tiny object from her pocket, presenting it to the world so everyone could see. Held between her thumb and index finger, it was a small rock that glinted in the sun, creating a nyriad of hues on its multi-faceted surface.
It was a diamond.
"How did you get that?" Kazuma stared at her in disbelief.
"Oh, nothing too special," the goddess shrugged and admired the stone. "Every goddess always carry one of this in case someone wants a stone to bring with them. Fortunately, I remembered to take one from our storage."
He shook his head. Well, that should make things easier. If they could somehow sell it and get a good sum of money, their quest should begin smoothly. All they had to do was find a prospective buyer and—
Something small, fast, and possessing a yellow hair darted in front of Aqua while she was busy looking at the stone and quickly sprinted away.
The diamond was gone.
The two of them blinked once. Then twice. Then thrice before erupting in an ear-splitting scream that caught the attention of everyone in the vicinity.
"The diamond! Our money! THIEF!"
Aqua shrieked frantically and behaved like a headless chicken, running around in hysteria and calling for help. The thing was, she was not doing anything to catch the culprit. And Kazuma took it upon himself to finally act.
"Kazuma, catch the thief!" the goddess wailed as he burst into a run.
He ignored her demand despite the fact the she was the reason it happened in the first place. Seriously, who would display a diamond in public like that and not expect it to get stolen? In any case, he simply focused on running after the thief.
Kazuma tore through the crowds, navigating the unfamiliar streets with a frantic expression. It happened all too fast for him to get a proper view, but during that brief period he managed to identify the thief as a female. A little girl somewhere around 12 or 13 to be exact.
The problem? She was too damn nimble and agile that he had lost her a few seconds later. But despite this, he still pressed on. He thought he had seen omeone who looked like darted in a narrow and dark alley up ahead, and he increased his speed to catch up.
Just as he reached it though, he bumped into someone.
Both of them yelped in surprised, crashing into each other and falling backwards on the ground. Groaning, Kazuma clutched his head in pain, before struggling to stand up to resume his chase. In front of him, the stranger was already doing the same thing, hastily gathering his belongings which consisted of a cellphone, several cup noodles, and a bag of potato chips.
...wait, what?
Kazuma stared in shock at the boy he had crashed into who looked just as young as him. A boy wearing an orange tracksuit, cursing as he stood up and hurriedly dusted himself off.
A boy who looked pretty much like a Japanese.
"Sorry about that," he began as way of apology. "But I'm in a hurry so..."
His voice trailed off as he locked gaze with a dumbfounded Kazuma who had momentarily forgotten about the thief, or the money, or even Aqua.
"Um... ah... gah..."
Rough translation: 'Oh my god'. Or something like that. It came out very differently considering how Kazuma struggled to find his voice. It had shocked him to meet someone who seemingly had the same circumstances as him.
Someone who had already died and was sent into another world.
Before the stranger could speak, however, he shook his head. "Sorry, gotta go! I have a thief to catch!"
With that, he turned toward the alley and ran. But no sooner had he taken ten steps that the boy followed him in a hurry.
"Thief? You too?" he shouted and sprinted after him.
Realization dawned on Kazuma immediately. "Yes! Something valuable got stolen from me!" he answered without stopping or glancing back. Technically, it was Aqua's, but whatever.
"Well, you're in luck!" the boy yelled and put up a burst of speed until he was beside Kazuma in less than five seconds. "Little girl with yellow hair?" he asked in a more level tone.
Kazuma glanced at him in surprise. "The same?"
"I'm afraid so," the boy smiled. "Name?"
"Satou Kazuma. Yours?"
As they both rounded a corner and head deeper, the stranger answered with a grin.
"Subaru. Natsuki Subaru."
Dear readers, may I present to you the very first, and quite possibly the only one in the net considering how my searches came up with nothing, Re:Zero and KonoSuba crossover fanfic. :)
Now I know I really have a lot of stories to update, but with my poor health condition during the last month, writer's block struck me big time and I couldn't do something productive. So what better way to get past that block than to write a new story? :D
With that out of the way, let's talk about the fic itself. I published this three days after the finale of Re:Zero's season 1(I refused to believe they won't continue it!), and two days before the official release of volume 9 of the light novel. But as you may have already noticed, this will not focus much on the cast of Re:Zero but on KonoSuba's. Hence, the prologue in Kazuma's POV.
About KonoSuba. Consider this story as a mash-up of both universes. Or to be more specific, most of the primary characters in KS are in the world of Re:Zero. Having said that, expect a load of altering for the backstories of some characters, especially Darkness/Lalatina since it is integral to the overall plot. Of course, this is KS we are talking about, and I plan to include a lot of hilarious scenes, EXPLOSIONS, BOOBS, and other shenanigans. ;)
Then again, this is Re:Zero too. So expect a shitload of gruesome deaths, depressing moments, a great deal of suffering, Felis, Beatrice, Rem, Roswaal's gayness, and an incredible amount of slothfulness in the form of our most beloved villian... BETELGEUSE ROMANEÉ-CONTI! *brain starts trembling in excitement*
Yes, I know they are complete opposites. But opposites attract, right? :)
Regarding Kazuma's RTD skill, I'm still really working on how it would activate in sync with Subaru's. But I already have a general idea, though it still needs polishing. All I could say is that it will further complicate things, especially for our self-proclaimed dumbass-turned-badass knight. (Unseen Hand, anyone?)
By the way, since Re:Zero has no other translations except Yen Press', I will use the web novel and wiki summaries as reference. So if you haven't read any of those yet, be warned that I will include many spoilers not seen on the anime. Same goes for KonoSuba which thankfully has fan translations up to the latest.
Well, sorry for the long author's note. I don't know when I would be able to update this, but I promise I won't leave you all hanging unlike a certain studio out there. With that said, it's really good to be back.
AH! MY BRAIN TREMBLES!
Please Read & Review!
Until next time!