I have no idea where this came from...
o.O.o
Orochimaru Has…
"Noooooooo! No this cannot be! Kabutoooooooo!"
The grey-haired ninja burst into Orochimaru's office, running straight into a shelf of surgical instruments and sending them flying. Orochimaru screeched and jumped onto his desk as the sharp tools spun towards his feet.
"Yes my lord?" Kabuto panted, rushing to grab all the tools and shove them in his pockets.
"My hair!" Orochimaru wailed, flapping his hands like a demented bird. "My hair is ruined!"
Kabuto stared at the dark oily strands that wrapped their way around his masters pale face. "I don't see anything wrong with your hair."
Orochimaru swooped down at Kabuto, eyes wide in madness. "It was gum! Gummmmmmm!" He ran around his desk frantically. "Get it out! Get it out! Get it out! It's ruining my beautiful hair!"
Kabuto grabbed a flailing arm and dragged his master closer to examine the tangled locks. His eyes widened as he saw a moist blob tangled in some of the strands. "What the hell happened?"
"Some Genin were talking about how great gum was and I thought it could help me gain Chakra so I tried some!" the pale man cried. "It fell in my hair and I can't get it out!" Orochimaru might be a sadistic killer but his hair was something else.
"Calm down my lord. I'll have to cut it out."
"Cut it out? CUT IT OUT?!" Orochimaru shook Kabuto so his teeth rattled. "I cannot cut my hair! I cannot cut my beautiful long hair… not after spending so much time growing it out!" He slumped on the ground in defeat. "I will simply have gum in my hair for the rest of my life."
"If that is what you wish."
Orochimaru hung his head. "No, but it must be cut out. The gum could rip my skin off if given the chance."
Kabuto stared. "I'm not sure that's how gum works-"
"No! Just CUT IT OUT!" Orochimaru screamed, turning so his back was to the grey-haired boy. "Get it over with…" His shoulders began to shake as Kabuto knelt down and sliced off the offending blob with a kunai.
"It's done, my lord."
Orochimaru spun and stared at his Genin, noting the sharp kunai in one hand and a mass of black hair in the other. He rose slowly and fixed the boy with a death glare. "You cut my hair! How could you?!"
"B-but my lord! You asked me to!"
"You will pay for that!" Orochimaru leapt at the terrified figure and Kabuto scrambled from the office, screaming at the top of his lungs.
Two Genin, lounging against a random wall, jumped so high their heads hit the ceiling when a squawking Kabuto shot past, followed by an enraged Orochimaru shrieking, "DIE HAIR THIEF! DIE!"
o.O.o
Owari