The following is a script I created a few years ago about a Death Battle someone once proposed to me and I only posted this once or twice elsewhere without much editing or discussion about a few other things. Please enjoy this edited version. I don't own any mentioned franchises. I'd be more rich otherwise.
-Wiz:Gods. Beings of great power capable of creating entire worlds...
-Boomstick:Like Arceus the Poke-God.
-Wiz:Or destroying them...
-Boomstick:Like Exodia the Forbidden One.
-Wiz:I'm Wiz,and he's Boomstick. And it's our job to determine who would win in a Death Battle.
Exodia Analysis
-Wiz:Long ago,a massive being of incredible power was split into 5 pieces and sealed away to keep it locked away from the world...
-Boomstick:And thanks to Kanami,it's easy to summon by buying cards at your local Wal-Mart.
-Wiz:Well,not that easy. The head piece of Exodia is harder to find then it's limbs. And then there is the low chance of getting all 5 cards into your hand in a game.
-Boomstick:It's worth thirty dollars or whatever to completely school your opponent in a card game with an instant victory though.
-Wiz:That's right Boomstick. When a player gets all 5 pieces in their hand,they unleash Exodia and instantly gain victory through its power.
-Boomstick:And this happens no matter what. Got three badass blue dragons fighting for you? Or maybe 3 Gods at your side? They can't save you from Exodia.
-Wiz:Yes. It seems that no matter the situation,once a player summons Exodia,they win instantly.
-Boomstick:And believe us when we say it's powerful. It even matched an evil monster named Zorc in power...until he lost that is.
-Wiz:Actually Boomstick, it wasn't all his fault. At the time of the battle,Exodia was being powered by an old man's soul. And when that man ran out of energy,Exodia was defeated.
-Boomstick:(murmurs) He should've carried some Viagra to help him out like Wiz.
-Wiz:What was that?
-Boomstick:I said,"Zorc is so powerful it took a fusion of 3 Gods to defeat him."
-Wiz:Exodia has shown he is capable of controlling his immense power and firing it in waves,focusing it into his fists,and even firing a deadly blast of energy that goes by a simple name...
-Boomstick: Obliterate. One of the most badass names ever!
-Wiz:And it's widely known as that is his method of ending every duel he is summoned into.
-Boomstick:Which is fun to see,not to receive.
-Wiz:Another thing about Exodia though,is that he doesn't have any serious weaknesses except he's very bulky and slow. Apparent from his only drawn out battle which was with Zorc.
-Boomstick:His Obliterate is powerful, but it only seems to work if your opponent is as big and slow as you are,or they are sitting across the table sitting still.
-Wiz:And despite being from the oldest card set in Yugioh, he is still used today in many decks.
-Boomstick:You don't want to stand in Exodia's way for sure! Even I'm not that stupid.
-Wiz:Now what did you say earlier about Viagra Boomstick?
-Boomstick: Oh look at that! The next fighter!
Arceus Analysis
-Wiz:A long time ago...
-Boomstick:In a galaxy far,far away...
-Wiz:Not that origin Boomstick.
-Boomstick:Sorry. Couldn't resist.
-Wiz:Anyway,long ago,before the world of Pokemon existed,there was Arceus.
-Boomstick:A god from unknown origins who got lonely one day and thought,"Why don't I make myself a universe where people train creatures to fight each other. That will be fun."
-Wiz:Actually his reasons for making the Pokemon Universe are still unknown,but we do have an idea how he did it. Legends say Arceus used his 1000 arms to literally create the universe.
-Boomstick:But Wiz,all I see are 4 legs on that thing. What happened to the rest? Is he a war vet?
-Wiz:Well Boomstick,it's believed his 1000 arms are actually just a description of his power,but then again,no one was actually there at the time Arceus created the universe.
-Boomstick:So wait,does that mean...
-Wiz:Yes,Arceus either told a human about this feat...
-Boomstick:Which is unlikely since he only trusted one guy many,many years after those stories were told...oh wait. There's Ash too.
-Wiz:Or it was pure superstition. We can only assume this legend was made by people who witnessed Arceus's incredible powers that surpassed other Pokemon. Over time rumors would become facts,and the truth would be forgotten.
-Boomstick: (mocking tone) But Wiz,what about the Poke-dexter? Doesn't it say Arceus did those things?
-Wiz:The Pokedex, which is an encyclopedia of information about Pokemon, has been proven to provide false information before. Like that the pokemon Larvitar has to eat an entire mountain before it could evolve,yet it really only needs to reach Level 30.
-Boomstick:Don't believe us about the weird "facts" in there? Go look it up on Youtube why don't ya?
-Wiz:It's weird why such a device that is instrumental to the science and analysis of Pokemon is filled with nonsense. The Pokemon Magcargo is supposedly 18,000 °F. That is hotter than the sun which is 9,941°F!
-Boomstick:Anyway, he didn't make the universe?
-Wiz:It's most probable. Many trainers can have their own Arceus that have their own moveset, personality, and stats. The Poke-God is also capable of being caught by a simple pokeball. Not to mention any Pokemon can knock him out in battle. These things show us that Arceus is not a god in terms of powers or abilities. He is just a Pokemon.
-Boomstick:Well even if he's not a god,he's still a kickass Legendary.
-Wiz:Arceus is known for possessing immense power and the Elemental Plates.
-Boomstick:With these plates,he can not only change types at will,but he can shrug off any attack if he has a plate of the same type.
-Wiz:His plates serve as a perfect shield and sword, allowing him to defeat any Pokemon he comes across by utilizing his Plates to negate all attacks and changing his type to an advantage over the opposing Pokemon. Effectively this makes him stronger than any other Pokemon in combat. With this great power he has defeated numerous opponent Pokemon.
-Boomstick:Like the Dragon Trio,whom he soloed with ease. And those things are badass! One of them had power over fucking time!
-Wiz:For his moveset,we are giving Arceus four moves that are natural and most suited for any battle...
-Boomstick:Recover is a simple move that heals Arceus. Could've used that last week when I tested my new invention, the rocket sword...
-Wiz:I won't even ask. Extreme Speed allows Arceus to move at incredible speeds and with it,he hits the target once or many times.
-Boomstick:And then there's Hyper Beam,a destructive beam of energy. But sadly,after using it,ya need to recharge your energy. It's basically like reloading a shotgun after using up all the ammo. Takes some time to refill it,but very much worth it.
-Wiz:Then there's Judgement. Arceus's ultimate attack.
-Boomstick:With an explosion of pure power,Arceus wipes out the competition. It's like the 4th of July.
-Wiz:Interesting enough,Judgement's typing is based off the Plate currently being used.
-Boomstick:Oh,and the god thing can fly. Neat right?
-Wiz:Another thing to note is that Arceus seems to possess an aura of pride and strong sense of justice. If you betray this Pokemon,best prepare for extinction.
-Boomstick:Arceus may not be a god,but he sure does pack a punch.
Conclusion
-Wiz:Now that the combatants are set,it's time to settle this debate once and for all.
-Boomstick:IT'S TIME FOR A DEATHBATTTTTLLLLLLEEEE!
Somewhere,on top of Mt. Coronet in the Sinnoh Region...
Arceus,the white dog-looking thing of a Poke-God,appeared suddenly through a golden portal. He then whispered to himself.
"I wonder how this world is fairing..."
Suddenly a massive neon pentagram appeared in the air nearby.
"What is this?!"
5 cards seemed to be at the points of the star.
"Are those cards?"
Two massive,golden arms broke through the pentagram. Soon followed a body .As soon as it came through, the pentagram faded away. Arceus turned to face the golden and Egyptian-like creature as it landed on the ground. Exodia The Forbidden One stared down Arceus with determination. Arceus chuckled to himself. It was time to battle.
"Let me show you the power of Justice!"
FIGHT!
Arceus instantly used Extreme Speed and kicked Exodia in the face in a literal blur of unreal speed that most Pokemon would have no chance of understanding. The result was surprising! Exodia didn't budge at all from the hit. Arceus gaped in awe of his opponent's strength. This was all Exodia needed to rear back his right fist and punch Arceus. The power behind the simple attack was so powerful,Arceus was sent flying into another mountain top several miles away.
Arceus used Recover to heal his wounds before he roared with power to escape the rubble of the destroyed mountain top he had found himself in. He glared at his foe in rage from afar. The fact that his plates were not activating and defending him did not cross his mind.
"You will bow before me!",the Pokemon cried out in rage.
Arceus used Extreme Speed to cross the distance between them within moments,and then he began a barrage against Exodia all over the giant's body with a multitude of near-invisible blows. Exodia could only swing at the air where Arceues had been after each consecutive strike. Arceus easily dodged another thrown fist before finally rearing back his head. Golden energy collected in his mouth before discharging it at Exodia point blank. The Hyper Beam hit Exodia right in the face. Exodia's head was then covered in smoke as the attack dissipated.
"Justice has been served.", Arceus muttered as he started to fly away slowly. Victory was his. Nothing could survive that.
Suddenly,golden energy formed around Exodia's left fist. As fast as he could,Exodia raised his left arm and fired a wave of golden energy directly at Arceus. Arceus turned around in surprise. The Poke-God then gasped and tried to fly away. Arceus was still recovering from using Hyper Beam however,so he couldn't dodge the incoming wave of energy well enough. It hit both of his right legs below the knees.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!",Arceus screamed in pain as his hit legs were completely incinerated instantly. The beam of energy continued to travel into the distance and vanished out of sight within moments.
Arceus felt to the earth far below in utter pain,too unfocused to maintain his flight. A large crater formed on the impact. The smoke soon faded away from Exodia's head to reveal a slight burn on his right cheek. Arceus looked up in agony as he used Recover to in hope regenerate his lost limbs and stop the bleeding. The golden giant then leaped from atop the mountain and landed with the grace of a stone nearby to Arceus. A more massive crater appeared under his feet, but Exodia calmly walked out of it with ease. Exodia now towered over the downed Legendary. Exodia put both his hands out in front of him,palms facing each other. Between the palms formed a ball of golden energy. Exodia reared back his right hand holding the energy ball,aiming at Arceus. Arceus having enough flew as fast as he could at Exodia,surrounded in black energy. The Pokemon completely ignored his still missing legs and let his rage consume him.
"JUSTICE!", Arceus cried out as he used Judgment.
Exodia then chucked the energy at Arceus point blank. It was Obliterate vs Judgement! The respective energies collided with incredible force,but one was obviously much stronger from the get-go.
"NOT POSSIBLE!", Arceus cried out in outrage before Obliterate overcame him.
BOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM!
The resulting explosion covered everything in dust. Then shortly after,one figure was visible in a void where a mountain system once existed. A large figure. Exodia stared at the spot where Arceus once existed. There wasn't even ash left.
KO!
Exodia is seen getting hit by a pokeball. He turns to see a startled Pokemon Trainer. Exodia then proceeds to use Obliterate on the unfortunate Trainer.
The beam of energy from Exodia earlier crashes into a boy with spiky brown hair and his little yellow dinosaur friend. They were promptly erased just after they noticed it.
-Boomstick:Holy shit! That Poke-God got Obliterated!
-Wiz:Yes. You see Arceus may be more agile,faster,and can fly,but...
-Boomstick:It's nowhere near enough.
-Wiz:The difference in power and durability is immense.
-Boomstick:Exodia destroys everything as soon as he's played. Nothing can literally stop him. He breaks all of the rules, wipes the board, and brings victory.
-Wiz:While a simple Magikarp can defeat Arceus in battle.
-Boomstick:And we ain't kidding! A freaking Magikarp can kill the Poke-God! How does that even happen?
-Wiz:When it comes down to it,Arceus is like any other Pokemon. He can be caught, trained,beaten,and nicknamed by a trainer.
-Boomstick:So I could name him Boomstick Jr?
-Wiz:I think so.
-Boomstick:Awesome. I'm so going to do that later.
-Wiz:And then there's the fact Exodia is about 10 times as tall as Arceus based on simple scaling with the egyptian buildings at Exodia's feet when he's fighting Zarc.
-Boomstick:And he weighs more too of course. Oh,and by the way,you know those plate thingies Arceus has. Those only kinda work on Pokemon, so they're kinda useless in this fight.
-Wiz:What's even more incredible is that Exodia has other forms,but Exodia would win in any form excluding Incarnate,which actually is used to bring out the original Exodia. Two of his other forms start out weaker than Exodia,but get stronger over time to no defined limit.
-Boomstick:And one form is literally immortal!
-Wiz:We could've given Arceus every virtual move he could possibly learn and it wouldn't change the outcome. Exodia's power literally supersedes anything Arceus could do in the end.
-Boomstick:You could say Arceus received his Judgement.
-Wiz:The winner is Exodia.
You wanna see a Death Battle? Leave a comment below on your idea!