My first fanfiction! Yay! Okay, so let's get down to business. This little ficcy of mine is based off of the Vocaloid song "I'm Sorry, I'm Sorry" by Hatsune Miku. Warnings for dark themes, character death, and mild descriptions of murder. Don't worry, they're not that explicit. The main pairing is Len/Miku. Don't like, don't read.
Disclaimer: I do not own Vocaloid.
. . . .
Miku couldn't think. She couldn't think through the thick, overwhelming haze of pain, flashing, on and off, the bright colors of red blocking her vision. The red of her own blood. Softly splattering, staining her violated body with loud squelches. She refused to cry out. To cry out in agony. Instead, she bit down on her lip, not caring if she drew even the tiniest bit of scarlet blood. It was nothing compared to this. Nothing. At times like this, Miku would vaguely wonder why she continued to live. After all, if life was all about pain, failures, and misery, why bother to continue at all? It was pointless, a twisted mind game. You would think that you were in control, but just when you think you can win, that invisible force pulls you back down again. Down into the deep, dark depths of Hell. Would Miku go to Heaven if she didn't survive? Her mother had always said that Heaven had a place for you, somewhere among the beautiful golden streets and dazzling stars. But where was her place?
"Why...?"
That voice. That sinisterly deep, vibrating voice. It sent shivers down her spine, made her want to curl up and run away from this horrid scene. She wanted Mommy back. Mommy would have stopped this, and she would have taken her someplace safe and protected her.
But Mommy wasn't here now.
And she would never return, that much Miku knew.
"Why do you continue to live? Why don't you just... Just go away? Just go away like your mother did...?" the voice spoke, still shaky, as if anguished. Miku's blue eyes squeezed shut, twitching in pain and sadness. Why wouldn't she go away? She wasn't welcome here. So why... Why did she continue to live if nobody wanted her? If nobody appreciated her?
"You just can't be killed, can't you? I've ridden this world of your mother, so why can't I do the same to you? Why... Can't you go... Away?" The voice took on a more psychotic, crazed tone. A tone that made Miku shudder uncontrollably. "Why can't you go away?"
Pain, sharp and cutting like the blade of a knife. More blood. Falling, streaming down her abused body like trickling rain on a windowpane. She remembered when her mommy would watch the rain with her. It was a pretty sight. One that would always make her giggle and laugh. The water would swirl around in fun and unique patterns. And Miku would trace them with the tip of one of her petite fingers. Mommy would merely chuckle, and hold her closer. She would sing to her, her warm voice comforting and sweet. That voice. It brought tears to her eyes as she realized she would never enjoy the rain with her mother ever again. The taste of salty, fat teardrops mixed with the sharp tang of blood, causing Miku to wince at the terrible cocktail.
"Mommy..." she managed to whimper, crying out a bit as the tip of her father's sharpened kitchen knife dug deep into her stomach, puncturing her insides. But physical pain would never scar her as much as the loss of the woman she loved the most. And it was all his fault. She glared up at the man, trying to force as much stinging venom into her gaze as possible. But it wasn't much. It only managed to make her seem more pathetic.
"Your mother isn't here to save you now, my love," the man crooned, false sweetness dripping from his low voice. "But don't worry. You'll be joining her soon enough. And won't that be nice...?" Another plunge, the blade digging deeper. Miku let out a shrill scream, only to be instantly cut off as blood bubbled at her lips, tainting her open mouth and dribbling down her chin and finally rolling down her neck. She didn't have enough strength to spit it out.
Daddy was wrong though. Mommy would always be there for her. She was watching her in Heaven now, wasn't she? The soft rhythm of her mother's lullabies drifted across her hearing. Was she here now...? Maybe, if she strained enough, Mommy would come into view and tell her everything was alright. But that wouldn't happen, no matter how much Miku wished it were true. Mommy would never come back. And it was all Daddy's fault. What had possessed her once kind, charming father to mutate into the horrible being that stood over her, knife in hand, with a manic grin plastered onto his face, which had now contorted into a twisted, ugly expression?
"Miku...?"
That voice. That soft, kind voice. It had brought her comfort too. And an unfamiliar, warm feeling that Miku didn't recognize. What was that feeling? It made her fuzzy on the insides, but turned her into a frazzled, stuttering mess at the same time when she was near that boy. Kagamine Len.
"Miku-chan, are you feeling alright?"
She shook her head, quite rapidly.
"Are you cold, Miku-chan?"
Despite the hot, sticky blood which was quickly drying on her torn and ragged outfit, she did feel cold.
"Do you want my coat, Miku-chan?"
Len-kun had known Miku for a long time. He knew her well enough to realize when she was feeling uncomfortable, or if she was uneasy or confused. When the cold, harsh storms of winter came, Miku would get cold. And Len-kun would always hand her his coat. And he would hug her. He would wrap his arms around her, and Miku would instantly feel better.
"I'll share my warmth with you, then," his sweet voice said, airy and light like the beautiful song that was created when Miku's neighbor's wind chimes clinked against each other. That fuzzy feeling started churning in her bleeding stomach again, as Len-kun's arms consumed her frail body. Her heart, it felt carefree, strong. As long as she was with Len-kun, Miku could forget about everything else. All of the pain and stress of life. Of her pointless, little life. A cruel world where nobody cared for her. Except for that one boy.
"Miku-chan... Hatsune... It's okay. I'm here now." Len whispered, an eerily hollow sound. Miku tensed in his arms. Hatsune. It had been awhile since anyone had addressed her by that name. Hatsune Miku. The sharp pain of reality brought Miku out of her delusional trance. The knife ripped upward, gouging a gory, bleeding scar in its wake.
"My daughter."
Miku could feel Len's presence, ever close.
"My child."
Was Mommy still in Heaven, waiting?
"Miku."
It didn't matter. Nothing mattered.
As long as Daddy was happy.