How to annoy a very dangerous(and crazy)VAMPIRE
Mission 1. You're GAY!
Emmett walked into the room, whistling a merry tune to himself. And when Emmett is whistling a merry tune, you know something bad is going to happen. Or at least the smart people do.
Unfortunately, poor Edward was too caught up in trying to decipher Emmett's thoughts to notice.
"Hey, Edward!" Emmett said cheerily. He sat down next to Edward on the sofa. Edward eyed Emmett's cheerful expression suspiciously.
"Hello, Emmett. Since when were you so cheerful? And since when did you start thinking in Japanese?"
Emmett grinned. "Since now. Listen, bro, I got a little question for you…"
"What were you doing on Friday night?"
Edward studied Emmett's expression, but found no trace of guilt--not that Emmett was ever guilty anyway. Deciding that it was a honest question, he answered.
"I was at Bella's house."
Emmett grinned a grin of Infinite Evil.
"Really?"
Edward arched an eyebrow. "Meaning?"
"I was under the impression that you went to Mike's house…"
"WHAT!?!??"
"I never knew you were gay, you know…"
"Wha…I mean, NO I AM NOT GAY!!!" Edward yelled.
Emmett sighed. "Still in the denial stage, I guess. Don't worry, Eddie, you'll come around quickly enough. I'm still your brother, I just thought Bella ought to know…"
A look of horror came over Edward's face as he read Emmett's mind.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
He leaped for Emmett, but the other vampire was already out the door, phone in hand. The door slammed shut right in Edward's face, forcefully enough so that it broke in two, sending splinters of wood scattering all over the place. By the time Edward had got clear of the rubble, Emmett had already vanished.
Edward groaned. It was going to be a looooooooong day…