"Who's Tom?" Kurt asked venomously as he looked at the screen of his boyfriend's phone.
"What?" Blaine called from the bathroom.
Kurt raised his voice and yelled, "Who the hell is Tom?"
Blaine froze when he walked back into the room to see Kurt holding his phone. As he balled his hands into tight fists he could feel the anger rising inside him like a volcano waiting to erupt.
He took a deep breath and walked over to where Kurt was sitting on his bed and said calmly, "Kurt, give me my phone."
Blaine then attempted to take the phone out of Kurt's hands only to have him jerk away from him. "Kurt, I'm going to say it again, give me my phone."
Kurt moved around Blaine to stand on the other side of the room. "No, not until you tell me who this Tom guy is who is texting you saying he misses you."
Blaine let out an exasperated sigh and looked up to the ceiling as if there was something there that could stop him from letting his frustration getting the best of him. He took another breath and walked right up to Kurt and roughly snatched it from his hand. Kurt's eyes widened and he took an instinctive step backwards, surprised at Blaine's reaction.
"I'm going to tell you this one more time Kurt, I am NOT cheating on you at school. I love you. There is no one else that I want. I've been at college for almost a year and still nothing has happened. How many times do we have to do this before you trust me?"
Blaine looked at Kurt expectantly, waiting on him to reply. As much as Kurt knew this was probably the worst thing to say right now he had to know. "Then who is Tom?" Blaine let out a rather loud aggravated grunt and moved to sit on Kurt's bed, letting his elbows rest on knees and head to fall into his hands.
As he ran his hands through his hair still with his head down he replied, "Tom is my twelve year old cousin that I went to visit last week." When Kurt didn't move or say anything Blaine looked up to see Kurt with his head turned slightly down in shame. Blaine released a humorless laugh and shook his head. "Are you satisfied now?"
Kurt didn't reply and still didn't make a move towards his boyfriend. "Kurt, come here."
Kurt still didn't make a move. Blaine looked at him to see a look of almost fright on the younger boy's face. He sighed again and walked over to where Kurt was standing, he placed a finger gently under Kurt's chin forcing him to look at him. He moved to cup Kurt's face in his hands and gently leaned his forehead to Kurt's.
Blaine closed his eyes and just stood there for a moment. After so long he looked up and released Kurt's face and reached down and took his hand and whispered softly, "Come on, I think we need to talk."
Kurt felt his heart drop. The words Blaine had just uttered were causing him to feel very nervous and he let Blaine lead him to sit down on the bed.
Blaine held onto Kurt's hand as he shook his head and began, "Kurt, what are we doing?"
Kurt felt the sting of tears come his eyes as he stuttered out, "What? What do you mean Blaine? I…I'm sorry I assumed...I just…I'm so scared of losing you, of you finding someone better." It felt like he was speaking a mile a minute and he couldn't seem to bring himself to look at his boyfriend.
Blaine squeezed Kurt's hand and said, "We've been over this so many times. In fact we went over it about a minute ago. You clearly don't trust me. You are so jealous Kurt. It's really hard to take sometimes. I know the distance is hard, but it is so much worse because you are always questioning me about who I'm with and what I'm doing. Do you even remember the last time we had a normal conversation that wasn't laced with you accusing me of something?"
Kurt remained silent looking at his hand that was intertwined with Blaine's. How could he have let himself make Blaine think he didn't believe in him, in them? Kurt let out a sigh of his own and pulled his hand away from Blaine's. Blaine looked hurt and moved to try to take Kurt's hand back. Kurt then put his hands together in his lap and Blaine backed off.
"I guess all I can say is that I'm sorry." Kurt shrugged his shoulders and continued, "What are you trying to say Blaine? If you don't want to be with me anymore just say it and get it over with."
As silent tears started to stream from Kurt's eyes, Blaine felt like someone had punched him right in the gut. He hated to see Kurt cry, and he felt terrible that it was because of him.
Blaine felt his own tears brewing and stood up and walked around the room with his fingers laced on the back of his head. He was pacing as if movement would help him figure out what he wanted to do. He turned to face Kurt and let his hands fall to his sides, "I don't know what I want Kurt."
Kurt visibly hunched over in an attempt to stifle the sobs that were threatening to break free. "Oh Kurt," Blaine said as he ran over to the beautiful pale boy who was on the brink of a break down. Blaine sat down and wrapped his arms around the boy he loved and let his own tears flow free. After a few minutes of just sitting there holding each other Kurt was the first one to pull away. Blaine only tightened his hold and Kurt had to actually peel Blaine's arms off of him.
"Why are you doing this? You can't tell me that you don't want me anymore and then try and hold me Blaine it doesn't work like that."
"I never said I don't want you. I'll always want you. I just don't know if I can do this anymore. All this angst is killing me. Maybe…maybe we should try to take a break." The last sentence Blaine uttered was barely audible, but Kurt heard it loud and clear. Kurt stood up and walked to the other side of the room and stood with his back to Blaine.
Blaine made his way to Kurt and softly placed his hand on the small of Kurt's back. When Kurt didn't make a move to get away, Blaine leaned his head on the slightly taller boy's shoulder and whispered in is ear, "This doesn't mean I don't love you. It just means I need some time." Kurt sniffled and bit his lip to try and stifle his tears.
Blaine wrapped his arms tightly around Kurt's slim waist and Kurt allowed himself to relax in his arms. At least for a few minutes they could both pretend that Blaine wasn't about to walk out of the door and out of Kurt's life. Blaine nuzzled the side of Kurt's neck and placed a small kiss on it. As he felt warm wetness of Blaine's tears on his neck Kurt couldn't keep back the sob that was waiting to be unleashed since this conversation started.
Blaine only held him tighter and Kurt couldn't help but think that this is the worst possible way to break up with someone. It would have been so much easier if Blaine would have just told him he doesn't love him anymore or that there was just something missing and he wanted to see other people, and then to see him simply walk away. But no, here was Kurt in the corner of his room being held by the boy who just ripped his heart in half while said boy kisses him and softly cries into his neck. This is definitely worse because Kurt knows that Blaine loves him and he knows that Blaine is hurting as much as he is and because of this Kurt can't be angry at Blaine.
But after several minutes Kurt can't take it anymore. He gives one last squeeze to Blaine's arms that are holding him so tight he is having trouble breathing, and hoarsely whispers, "Can you go now?"
Blaine wasn't expecting Kurt to ask him to leave, but he supposed he deserved it. He kissed the side of Kurt's neck one last time lingering for a moment and slowly loosened his grip on his now ex-boyfriend's waist until his arms were at his sides. He instantly felt a wave of complete loss come over him. He suddenly longed for the warmth of Kurt's body against his chest. He wanted to turn him around and see his breathtaking eyes and kiss the tears away.
Just as Blaine had made up his mind and was about to lean back into Kurt what he heard literally made him feel like he had just been run over by a bus. "Please…" Blaine almost choked on a sob at the fact that Kurt was now pleading with him. He was quietly begging Blaine to leave him. Blaine instantly regretted this ludicrous decision. Why was he doing this? He couldn't even seem to remember.
With Blaine still not leaving, Kurt wanted to turn around and push him out, but he knew there was no way he could bring himself to do that. So instead, Kurt silently half turned and walked toward his bathroom closing and locking the door.
Blaine was left stunned, Kurt had now literally closed the door on him and it was his entire fault. All Kurt ever did was love him and make him the happiest man alive and now he didn't have him anymore. Kurt was no longer his. Upon this realization Blaine lunged toward the door but as he lifted his hand up to knock he slowly let it drop. He leaned is forehead on the door and let out a heavy breath. "Goodbye Kurt."
Blaine then turned and walked up the stairs and quickly out of the house in the hopes of avoiding any members of Kurt's family. He succeeded and practically sprinted to his car. Just as he was pulling out of the driveway he caught a glimpse of the curtains pulled back ever so slightly and he locked eyes with Kurt. Kurt held his hand up in a small wave of goodbye and as quickly as he appeared he was gone.
As Blaine drove home he couldn't help but think that he may have just ruined the best thing that had ever happened to him.