Surprises
By: The Equal Opportunity Fangirls
Summary: Life is full of ups and downs, twists and turns. Whether it's getting promoted or getting kissed for the very first time, life always has a little surprise in store for those who wait. (EdxWinry, RoyxRiza)
Hi there! We are the EOF, an organization of fangirls who only share love on canon pairings. This fanfiction is actually a role-play, between the following fangirls--
Chiiko- Edward Elric and Winry Rockbell. (If you can figure out my original screen name, cookies for you! XD It's not that hard, especially if you follow my stuff at LiveJournal.)
Ai- Roy Mustang
Chiharu- Riza Hawkeye ((and kudos to her 'cause Chiiko can't write Riza AT ALL!))
Natsushi- Alphonse Elric
Kiya- Envy
Story notes: This chapter was written by Chiiko, Ai, Chiharu and Kiya.
Thoughts
START STORY
With a long-suffering sigh, a certain frenetic blonde pipsqueak opened the door to the office of his commander, Colonel Roy Mustang.
"Hel-lo Col-onel Shit," he drawled, emphasizing each syllable loudly and clearly, "So nice to see you again"
"I knew I'd be getting a headache on in FullMetal." The onyx haired man inside the room groaned, dropping his head onto his hands.
"What do you want from me anyway? I'm in the middle of some research--"
"In which you're doing nothing but running headfirst into brick walls." Roy interrupted gleefully, "And that's why you, Edward Elric, are taking a vacation."
"Wait. What?"
"You heard me. Go back to your hometown. I'm sure there are people there who would love to see you!"
Ed blushed, "My relationship with Winry is none of your business!"
"Oh? I never said anything about that…what's this relationship I'm hearing about?"
"Sir…that's really none of your concern…" Hawkeye put a hand on Roy's shoulder, "Leave him al--"
"Shh, Riza. It's fine." He smirked, looking back at Ed, "So tell me your story, FullMetal. Your kind boss can help you get laid."
Long silence.
Edward stared at Roy, slack-jawed and bug-eyed, his complexion the color of a ripe tomato, "W-w-w-wha--?! No! It's nothing like that!"
"Don't lie to me! You're a teenage boy and all teenage boys have--"
"GAH! GO TO HELL!" Ed shouted, running out of the office and slamming the door. Said pipsqueak stomped down the stairs furiously and out the door. He needed a bit of time to cool his head before he could properly talk to Winry…
THIS STATEMENT MEANS WE ARE SWITCHING POV'S
"Sir…that really wasn't any of your concern." Riza said sternly, looking directly at Roy, who was laughing hysterically, "Leave Edward alone about his…er…love life"
"Nonsense. I care about the boy. I would never do anything to make him feel uncomfortable." Roy grinned, looking for all the world like an incredibly pleased five-year-old, "Ahh, the look on his face was absolutely priceless!"
"Sir?"
"Yeah?"
"Grow up." She fixated him with an icy stare. Roy gulped and nodded, looking back down at his paperwork.
"Hey, Falman. Looks like the sexual tension has already started today." Havoc smirked. Falman snorted and put a hand over his mouth, trying to hold back the laughter.
Click. Click.
Not even five seconds later, the muzzles of two handguns were stuck firmly to both of their heads. Riza Hawkeye, looking more menacing than a ravenous bear, was standing over them, fingers gripping the triggers, "Don't ever talk like that about the Colonel and me again."
"Y-y-yes ma'am!" Both men stuttered, turning back to their work with cold chills crawling down their spines.
"Besides," said Roy quietly, "There could never be any sexual tension between us."
Roy had no idea those simple words tore Riza up inside.
"The Colonel is absolutely right." Hawkeye nodded.
And Hawkeye never knew how badly she just hurt him.
THIS STATEMENT MEANS WE ARE SWITCHING POV'S
Edward stood outside, the breeze blowing his golden bangs into his face. It sure has been a while since I've been home…Al probably misses me a lot. He started to walk into the woods behind the office before reaching a shady tree. Ed lay down and closed his eyes, leaning against the tree's hefty trunk. I've missed her too… Even in thinking, a soft blush crossed his face as his mind's eye produced a picture of Winry, close friend and mechanic. Hell, I've missed her a lot. Bastard he may be, but Mustang's right about that.
With that last thought, he blinked a few times, ready to fall asleep. That last time, however, something stood in his line of vision.
It was bony.
It was pale.
It was…wearing a skirt?
Oh no…
"Hey there, pipsqueak. Miss me?" Sure enough, leering above him was Edward's worst enemy; the only somewhat-male thing he had seen dressed like that…
Envy, the homunculus was standing directly in front of him, a malicious grin on his face and a knife in his right hand.
Edward jumped up in shock, transmuting his arm into a sharp blade, "What the hell?! Could my day get ANY worse?"
"Aww, Edward, I thought you'd be glad to see me…" Envy feigned hurt and changed into Winry's form, "Do you hate me even as your cute little girlfriend?"
"I'm not happy to see you! AND WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK SHE'S MY GIRLFRIEND?!"
"She isn't? Ohh…that changes everything." Envy-Winry twirled around in a circle, examining the curves of her body before changing into his original form, "Then I should take her for myself. She's very sexy…maybe hold onto her, have my way with her and then break her poor little heart!"
Minutes later, Envy found himself slammed into the tree, Edward's automail fingers wrapped tightly around his throat. The boy growled loudly, a sound to put a tiger to shame, "Don't you ever talk about Winry like that!"
"Oh? I didn't think you cared."
"I…" Ed paused for a moment, his hand shaking slightly, "I…"
"Too slow!" Envy grinned maliciously and punched Edward in the face, sending him careening to the ground. He quickly changed to Ed's form and began to taunt him, "Oh, look, I'm Edward Elric and I hate my life because I lost an arm and a leg and the girl I like hates me!"
"Shut up!" Ed yelled, running to attack the homunculus. Envy back flipped smoothly out of the way and met Ed's blade with his own. Metal against metal clanged loudly when there was a loud "CRACK!" sound Suddenly Ed's left leg sunk into the ground, causing him to be ridiculously off-balance, "Ack! What the…?"
"Ah, FullMetal shrimp, looks like you broke something" Envy taunted, looking at Ed's lopsided form, "It only makes it easier to kill you!"
Ed shook his leg vigorously and his metal kneecap fell from the leg of his pants. He grunted in pain as the nerves were bared to the cold air and gritted his teeth, "Does-it-matter? I won't let you kill me!"
"Why? Cause you haven't gotten together with your girlfriend?" Envy mocked, smirking at the pained look on Ed's face, "Maybe you'll attack me more in this form!"
Sure enough, Envy transformed into Winry again. Edward stopped midstep, cursing under his breath. He couldn't work up the courage…not to kill him in this form…
"What's wrong?" he laughed, kicking Ed hard in the stomach. Ed hit the ground in pain, groaning weakly, "Aww, it was no fun fighting you today! You've become so sloppy and weak…oh well; guess I can kill you now, you and that bastard's blood in your veins."
"You actually think…I'll let you…kill me…?" Ed wheezed, standing up slowly and holding out his hands in a fighting position.
Envy hit him hard again and laughed as he fell back down. He quickly changed back to his homunculus form, "Ha ha ha! Life isn't fair, am I right? I mean, poor you, you have everything and yet you still act like your life is full of pain and suffering. You know nothing, nothing at all! I feel generous, so I'll kindly end your 'pain'. I'll kill you so you'll never have to see this stricken world again and face its 'agony'. Sound good?" Envy crouched next to the apparently weak Ed.
Edward looked him right in the eye, "No. It's YOU who know nothing!" he jutted out his arm blade into the homunculus' stomach.
"Damn you…" Envy gasped before falling to the ground with a splatter of blood.
Ed sighed and stood up slowly, still limping heavily. That didn't kill him…but it would keep him down for a little while. He shambled back to the office, still wheezing with lack of breath. Ed leaned against the doorway and tried to catch his breath.
Almost as if on cue, a certain Colonel entered the room, "Oh! FullMetal? Shouldn't you be gone by now?"
"I don't need your help right now, bastard!" Ed growled, not even bothering to look at him, "Go away!"
"Okay…but the last train to Resembool leaves in twenty minutes…"
"WHAT?!" Ed's head snapped up and stared straight at Roy, "You aren't kidding, are you. Oh…shit…"
"Better run fast! Can't keep that girl waiting any longer!" Roy teased, waving as Ed ran out of the door.
"Shut up!" Ed shouted and ran as fast as his broken auto-mail could carry him.
END
So…did you like it? Hate it? Feel annoyed by minor mistakes? We would like to know!
Chiiko wants you all to know that she thinks she's becoming an ACTION TYPER! XD Apparently she makes faces when she writes. O.o A bit weird…oops…
Please review! Chapter two will be up soon!
Love,
The EOF
PS--Wanna join our ranks? You can tell us that too:D