A/N) Hi guys, just an inspired thought because tomorrow is my birthday, yah. I'm one year older. I can't belive I've been on this sight for four years now... wow.
Anyway, sorry if I haven't updated any of my other stories. Been real busy lately and such. Work and school such. But enjoy anyway.
Disclaimer) I don't own Knd. But it would be a nice birthday present ;-)
"Numbah 362, sir! We have a distress call for floor fifteen on moon base, they said it requires our immediate attention."
"Thank you Numbah 59, I'll look into it."
The young operative saluted and marched away from his supreme leader, leaving her to rub her temples.
They 12 year old blond was at her wits end, for two years she'd worked on this organization to ride it of it's depressing encounter with their former Supreme Leader, and now in just four short weeks... she was going to be viewed just like all the other enemies. All her hard work wasted, gone, down the drain.
She sighed again and lifted her usually shining brown eyes to an exit. She slowly made her way to the moon base elevator not paying much attention to the saluting operatives as she passed. She was much more interested in the folders she had in her arms. Files of previously decommissioned operatives, and ones to come. She gulped as she noticed hers was on top.
She hated this, since she came into the Kids Next Door, she'd given it her utmost loyalty and support, but now the dreaded day that all operatives had to face sometime was coming up faster then she'd like it to. The day when she had to have her memory ripped from her and be proclaimed by all the others... an official teenager.
She shook her head, it wasn't that she was afraid of becoming a teen, it was just that she was terrified of what would come from it. Would she turn against the very organization she'd sworn to protect without her memory? Would they all hate her? Or would she disappear all together?
Footsteps shuffling snapped her out of her growing fear, "Numbah 362 sir?"
The petit blonde looked up, "Yes Numbah 93.14?" she looked at the operative with her usual leader stare, calm, firm yet under the level of "grown up".
"Um, well we were decorating the main hall for the party tomorrow night and we ran into some Huge-a-mongous trouble."
The Supreme Leader raised an eye brow, "No kidding, what's the problem?" She asked following the operative into the room.
Seven more operatives were in it, one with long black hair and green eyes flew forward, "Oh Supreme Commander sir! we have a big, big, big, big, biiiig problem!"
"Yes so I have heard, what is it?" She was getting impatient now, she had a lot of other things to do before this event.
Another kids jumped forward his brown hair bouncing with every hyper hop, "The absolute worst trouble we've ever had!"
Numbah 362 opened her mouth to ask one more time when yet another operative came from behind her. He had sandy blond hair and brown eyes that shifted wildly from side to side.
"It's worse then the tolinator, Mr. Boss! Heck it's ten times worse then... then even Father!" He screeched in her ear making her wince.
All the other kids gasped in horror unaware of their Supreme Leaders growing aggravation. They all began shouting over one another neither explaining the problem.
362's temper began to simmer over until she cracked, "WHAT THE CRUD IS THE PROBLEM!"
Everyone shut up instantly. They all looked at their angered leader... it was frightening seeing as it was rare to see her snap like that.
Then a small red headed girl stepped forward, she smiled chirpily, "We can't decide if we should hang up blue or purple streamer. What do you think Supreme Leader sir? Uh, sir?"
She was gone.
X.X.X.X.X.X.X
"Of all the stupid, idiotic, wasting my time for streamer. STREAMER no less. Ugh, kids." 362 plopped down in her office chair no sooner regretting her thoughts. She wasn't even thirteen and she was already thinking like one. But then she was always mentally ahead then most children, if not all.
But still whenever she found a mission objective silly, or an excessive ice cream run ridicules, she felt more and more like a traitor...
Traitor... she mulled over the word.
It was a horrible word that meant pure dishonor to oneself and others. It was a word that stripped people of their dignity and left them in dark misery. She hated that word and everything it stood for. She didn't want to have it associated with her name. She couldn't take the horrid feeling.
That's why she felt guilty whenever she found something in the Kids Next Door meaningless. Guilt, was another word... basically it either paired up with traitor or... was nowhere near it.
Her mind slowly went backwards, to all the previous traitor, Numbah 11, Numbah 12... Numbah 274...
She disliked him the most, the others were operatives, but he, he had been the best, the top kid, the supreme leader, then he'd just thrown it all away, leavening his mess behind for her to clean, leaving her to waste the last two years of her childhood.
She shook her head, his name and Numbah had blackened everything the kids Next Door stood for, He WAS everything the Kids Next Door stood for... Was...
Another terrible word to her...
Everything was in order, the decorations, the food, the music, this Kids Next Door 7th generation anniversary was ready to go... well almost ready.
She, herself wasn't ready. She still had to go pick up her dress from earth for this formal yet kids styled occasion. She took one more look at the decorated room, not bad for a bunch of kids.
The poor commander shook her head mentally cursing herself for thinking such thoughts, for a bunch of kids? What the crud was she thinking to herself?
Slowly she turned around and headed for the moon base pods.
"Numbah 362, sir!" Someone called behind her, she turned with a refined look on her face.
"Yes Numbah 42?"
"Um, we have a teeny tiny problem." He said uncomfortably rubbing his neck.
The blond girl sighed, "Get on with it."
"Um, Numbah 38 has... um, eaten all the Ice cream for the party, sir." He said quietly.
Numbah 362 sighed again ,"Again? How does he do that? Oh, never mind," She waved her hand dismissively, "Just get some extra cake and nobody will notice."
The operative saluted and turned away.
"Ugh, one of these days..."
She turned and headed for the space pods to earth.
The wind was cool and crisp, she'd forgotten it was autumn on earth. The supreme leader spent do much time on the moon base it was on rare occasions when she came back down to the real world.
True, she could have gotten someone else to get her dress for her, but the truth was she just wanted to get a breath of fresh air, she'd been feeling suffocated lately. If it was by her thoughts or the others, the young girl wasn't sure.
Here we are, Bradford and Mime. She thought as she looked at the neat little dry cleaners. It was on a more posh side of town, small but elegant. She pulled open the door and was greeted by a strong sweet smell of detergent and perfumes.
The cream colored marble floor shone and showed her entire reflection, the desk was rounded polished dark wood and the clerk was tall, skinny, and not friendly looking. More like snobbish if you asked her.
She walked confidently up to the desk and looked straight up at the man, he glared down his nose at her with a look of distaste.
"I'm here to pick up my garment, blue strapless trumpet please." She said in her most grown up voice, which she noticed sounded even more grown up then she remembered.
"Number please?" He said, sounding like a snob with a stuffy nose.
The blond girl was caught off guard for a moment, then realized, oh, he doesn't want my number... the dresses number. Phew. She handed him the number card, "Here you go sir." She said politely.
He took it with two fingers, glanced at it then disappeared in the back.
The supreme leader tapped her finger tips on the polished table top, waiting.
Two minutes, three, four, five... ten, where the crud was this guy?
She leaned her face on her hand and continued to tap impatiently.
Suddenly she felt a chill run up her spine, someone was behind her.
"Long time no see 362."
The voice sunk into her mind, her entire body stiffened as her muscles became tense ready for any sort of attack. She turned around rigid, her eyes narrowing...
"Chad Dixon." She spat his name out as if it were poison.
"The one and only," he smirked throwing his arms out as if to display himself.
She gritted her teeth, calm, keep calm, Don't let him get to you. She told herself maturely.
"What are you doing here teenager?" She questioned suspiciously.
"I'm planning world domination, what does anyone do at a DRY CLEANERS? Yeesh, some kids, so dense," He retorted sarcastically.
"Yah, well... you can't blame me now can you." She bit back, no way was she going to let him win this one.
He looked back at her, his eyes glittering, "No need to bite Rach, after all I'm a supreme leader, your a supreme leader, we should both be discussing world peace over tea." He shot a toothy grin at her.
"One: don't call me Rach, My name is Rachel, thank you very much and I am a supreme leader of the kids next door so I will be addressed to by my number, 362, or sir, especially by you. and Two: You WERE a supreme leader, were, as in, your not anymore." She folded her arms with a triumphant smirk of her own.
Chad shook his head while clicking his tongue, "You still go by that, what are you 12 years old now, wow your practically all grown up... speaking of which, when IS the big day." He questioned knowing the answer to that question very well.
Rachel stiffened, she didn't like this, she was talking to a traitor, forget that he was a teenager.
"None of your business." She pouted like a child.
He chuckled, "Cute Rachy, real cute, but I already know, so you here to pick up a birthday dress?" He emphasized "birthday" for her wincing benefit.
It worked, sure any kid would love the mention of their birthday, but not this certain birthday, a Kids Next Door operative thirteenth birthday was practically a death sentence.
"No, leave me alone, teenager." She snapped turning back to the desk, again. Where the crud was that snob?! She was getting irritated.
"Thirteen, pffft I remember that age," The boy continued, "Worst year of my life."
Rachel's interest was piqued. He hated turning thirteen? Maybe there was some remorse in him after all.
"It took forever to figure out how to wear my hair." He finished with the worst smirk she'd seen yet.
"Ugh, you are despicable!" The blond girl growled, "How could you think that's what ruined your thirteenth year!? Don't you have some guilt and sadness for what you've thrown away that year?" She was livid now, but something inside said she wasn't entirely mad at him.
"You know... your pretty cute."
Her mouth fell open, what was wrong with this idiot?
"You are unbelievable, I still can't believe you could live with your self knowing how much you tarnished the supreme leader name."
"Ahem, your dress miss."
Rachel turned around, well it's about time, "Thank you." She said shortly and took the plastic covered garment.
She glared at the teenaged boy behind her, "You are right about one thing though, I AM growing up, and even though it's a hated thought... at least I know I'll grow up with dignity."
Chad actually winced this time, her words cut deep, but he wasn't done yet, "That may be, but even though I've lost my honor, I'll still have my memories, and you'll be walking around with holes in your head, with nothing." He spat back, then, jamming his fists in his jean pockets, he sauntered away and out the door.
Rachel shook her head in pity for the stupid teenaged boy, but then a more grown up side to her was telling her:
He's right.
The Supreme Leader looked at herself in her mirror, I guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be. She thought to herself.
She had the dress on with a hint of glitter on it, she'd tried to make her hair up but it didn't come out right, so she just decided to pull on a head band. She looked half decent.
Now she had to go and make her grand Supreme Leader appearance.
Oh joy, what she really wanted to do was go home. This was a waste of time, she didn't like to waste time. The more she thought about it the more she thought like a teenager.
"Oh forget it!" She shouted to the dark corners of her office. She ripped the headband off her head and tossed it in some direction then she plopped down on her swivel chair, exasperated.
She was tired, tired of waiting for her upcoming doom, tired of wasting her life, tired of fighting with herself, tired of trying to find different ways to justify her warring thoughts.
"I give up, there's nothing left, no way around it." She buried her face with her hands to hide her misery and shame, "Better operatives have fallen... I will too. That's all there is to it." She sniffed.
"Yah, that's what I tried to tell myself too. But we all know it's not true."
The rough voice in the still dark of her office scared her into an actual squeak of surprise. She looked around wide eyed and frightened.
"Who... whose there?" She quivered to the dark.
"Doesn't really matter, does it?" The voice came again and he stepped out of the shadow.
Rachel gasped, "How did you get in here?! How did you pass our security?"
He chuckled at her bewildered expression, as he stepped forward slowly towards her desk, "Have you forgotten who set up those security systems? Tsk, tsk, tsk, not even decommissioned yet and your already forgetting." He laughed a short laugh as he leaned forward on his palms which were resting on the edge of her desk.
Numbuh 362 began to feel an unfamiliar uneasiness grow in her, "I... shut up, just leave before I call the entire moon base on you, or better yet, let me just do it without giving you the option." She raised her finger over the threatening red button on her desk.
Just as she place her finger on it Chads larger hand fell on hers and lifted it away.
She snapped her eyes up to meet his glittering blue orbs, "Now, now Rach, you wouldn't want to do that." He said smoothly.
Rachel grimaced as she tried, unsuccessfully, to withdraw her hand from his grasp, "Let. Go. Dixon!" She snapped her voice raising.
"Shhhh, I don't think anyone wants to find their Supreme Leader like this... with a traitor. In her office, in the dark..." His smirk looked dark in the shadows, almost alluring, "Alone." He chuckled as her face fell to pieces.
"You're revolting... I can't believe you'd think that I, that I could, that... UGH!" She tried to yank her hand out of his again but he held fast, being stronger then her had it's advantages.
"I said quiet." He hissed at her while pulling her over her desk, turning her around and securing her arms behind her back.
"What do you want?" She said out of breath now, just tell me and leave me alone." She hated herself so much at that pathetic moment, but she was already in an emotional disarray, she just wanted him to go away.
Chad's body tensed behind her, "What do I want... hum, well that IS an interesting question."
Rachel felt a sick to her stomach feeling like he had a double meaning to those words. She was right.
"Well I wanted a lot of things, I wanted to stay the best KND operative, I wanted to have a normal life at some point, I wanted to be accepted, I wanted to be happy... ah, so many things... and guess what."
He leaned closer to her ear, his warm breath tickling her ear and making the small hairs there move. She bit her lip to keep her maturing side down.
"I didn't get any of it." He hissed, sending shivers down her spine.
"You lie!" She growled, a sudden charge of anger bursting forward strengthening every muscle in her body. She wiggled fiercely and kicked the older boy in his shin, making him let go with a yelp and fall back wards from a round house kick she generously supplied him with.
He rubbed his chest, propping himself on his elbow as she glared down at him.
"You were the best KND operative, you could of had a normal life if you let them decommission you, you could have been happy if you'd just stuck with all the code and honor that you represented. But no, you became selfish, putting yourself before the KND, almost destroying the entire moon base, but successfully demolishing your reputation and name. You, Teenager, are to blame for everything that's happened to yourself, or... to everyone else. Now leave my office." She growled pointing a straight finger towards the door, her eyes burning with anger.
She felt proud of herself, her Supreme Leader side had won over her teen side and was applauding. Up until a dark chuckle came from the now standing teen. Her face shattered, what was he so happy about? Whatever it was, it couldn't be good.
"You really think that... your really smart, but sometimes you confuse reality with dreams." His voice was low, and rough, it was still maturing but it was mature enough to freak the young girl out.
"No Dixon, that's your problem, I know what I believe in and what I am going to do." She felt so sure, so confident. But the look he sent to her suddenly weakened her standpoint.
He had that smile on his face. It was a smile she would have whenever Harvey asked if she knew what was in his birthday presents. Revealing all yet nothing, like he knew so much more then she did.
"Listen to your self 362. You're so close to being finished your delusional. But, I, as a previous Supreme Leader, will have some pity on you and give you a piece of advice. Once they decommission you, you'll be forgotten just like everyone else that's been a good operative. On that day you're realize, all your hard work was for absolutely nothing. You're better off leaving now." He let out a sharp dry laugh, a mocking laugh, a laugh that pitied her and angered her horribly.
She wasn't one to lose her cool, but this teenager knew just what buttons hurt to push. She let out a hiss and threw her leg at him, he dodged it of course, as she flew at him in every battle move she had learned during her life.
"Your wrong! They won't forget! The KND is worth all the work! Your just bitter about it because they remember you for the wrong reasons!" She yelled throwing everything she had at him. Her face turning red as her mind battled with itself.
He dodged each move with a smirk, smoothly, calmly, enjoying how she was losing her temper. It only meant he was right.
"Am I? Am I really... or are you the bitter one?" He took her by surprise and yanked her arm, twisting it around to her back, pinning her to the wall.
She let out a slight squeak of pain, but refused to show anything else, "You're pathetic." She hissed refusing to give up.
He bent over, pressing against her until his mouth was aligned with her ear, "No Rachel. You are. Pathetic because you still believe all you've done is for nothing. You're bitter because deep down inside you know, that even though I was a traitor to these kids, I would still have my memories. And you would have nothing. You know you want those memroies, you know you wish you had the guts to keep them like me..."
He was probing into her mind, trying to brainwash her. Telling her what she wanted when she really didn't... Her mind was fighting as his words seeped in... the Suprem leader was fighting with her teenager self. To the horror of her mind... the teenager side was winning. She wanted to keep her memories... she really did, but at such a price. What was a few opinions of a couple of kids hat wouldn't even remember you afterwards. But she would remember, her loyalty would be scard... no, she didn't know what she wanted any more.
She let out a broken yell and kicked the boy on his shins making him let go for a second giving her the opportunity to escape his grasp.
She turned to face him, fist ready, her heart speeding up from the near loss she almost had with her loyalty. She glared at the traitor in front of her. She didn't know how he could handle the burden of being a traitor even if he did have his memories. She couldn't imagine throwing her very character away... it hurt to much to even consider, but she had considered it.
In the deepest darkest corner of her mind she had considered it, was considering it... she even dared hope she could do it. That only proved what a traitor she was. The strong leader suddenly felt overweighed.
He was Right.
She knew it, not even her child side could deny it. He found the cost of his loyalty and name minimal compared to his memories he had kept.
She caved. Her whole spirit caved. A sob wretched itself from her throat as she finally broke through that last picture of illusion. She was finally breathing in reality. And it couldn't have been more painful. She couldn't keep fighting it, there was just no way to fight it. Growing up, turning into a teenager it was what everyone did, what everyone had to do. There was no way to stop it, fighting it only caused hurt and suffering.
She fell to her knees, hugging herself tightly, her blond hair falling over like a curtain covering her face from view. Her tears fell in large drops, rolling down her face onto the floor of her office.
Chad watched. He wasn't happy at this turn of development. He'd seen this kind of sadness. He was subject to it himself. It hurt, bad. When you realized you couldn't stay a kid forever... it was pretty harsh.
He wasn't here to watch this girl cry. But that didn't mean he wasn't going to help calm her.
Rachel wasn't aware of anything, she'd almost forgotten the boy was in the room. Until she heard his soft footsteps make their way towards her. She expected a sneak attack. The soft rub she received on her back shocked her to actually stop crying.
She looked up, her eyes brimming with tears, wide open. She searched his face as he stared back calmly as if he wasn't violating her space.
She saw a look of understanding, not pity, not smugness. Just true understanding. He knew what it was like, he had already experienced it. But what she didn't understand was why? Why did he feel anything, wasn't becoming a traitor his choice in the first place.
He could read her thoughts in her eyes. One look and she suddenly knew.
It hadn't been his choice.
He was as much a prisoner of loyalty and mind battles as she was.
She felt a sudden sense of relief, she wasn't alone after all.
He saw the lightness come over her. She let a small smile of gratitude cross her face before she shocked him by turning and wrapping her arms around his torso, leaning her head on his chest. It took him a minute to shake off his surprise before he felt his body swell with longing and hugged her back tightly.
He'd kept the same thing she was showing down so long he didn't realize how much he really was holding down. Just a soft hug from this girl brought all that hidden despair and misery up and out.
Two young people in the dark.
Both suffering in the war of growing up.
Both so loyal to childhood it was tearing them apart.
But up until now each was by themselves. Now two togeather seemed to lighten the load a little.
Rachel wasn't sure how long they stayed like that. But she vaguely became aware of the time and a slight though passed her mind of what was going on at the party? Did anyone even notice she wasn't there? Probably not.
She didn't want to go anyway. She felt nice and warm right there before that pesky small voice in her head told her that someone was bound to notice if she didn't go before the end of the party. She grudgingly pulled away looking up at the older boy. He seemed different somehow. His eyes weren't lined with bitter resentment at the moment. They looked serene and lighter.
She smiled unexpectedly. Her heart suddenly became lighter when he smiled back, the first real smile she'd seen on his face since forever.
"Thanks Chad." Neither needed an explanation to what she meant.
He nodded and ran a hand through her short silky blonde hair making her shiver pleasantly for once.
Aware of the time Chad got up and headed for her office window. Rachel watched with a sudden feeling of guilt.
Her teenager side was growing stronger, and hugging a teenaged boy only helped it win even more.
"Chad wait." It felt slightly weird to say his name without malice laced into it.
He stopped turning towars her, one leg out the window, "Yah?"
She bit her lip not meeting his eyes for a second, "I... what did you come here for anyway?" She hadn't meant to ask that but somehow she couldn't bring her true thoughts to light yet.
A slight flash of mischief passed his eyes, "To recruit you for the Teen Ninjas." He said simply, enjoying the reaction she gave him.
"You... what? But you knew I wouldn't..."
He sighed and came back into the room straight up to her. Crossing right over her personal space, placing a hand on her shoulder, "Yah I knew... but they won't like it."
She tilted her head to one side, "Chad, if your not really a traitor then... what are you?" She couldn't help it if she never let any details pass her.
He bent over and kissed her lightly on the cheek making her gasp in surprise as a tingly sensation flew through her. He smiled back, "Undercover. That's it you can know. And don't worry," He placed his forehead on hers, "if you do get decommissioned, I won't let anything happen to you."
Her heart skipped a beat, he wouldn't let anything happen to her... he was willing to risk her not knowing him and everything he had just so nothing would happen to her. She felt a tint of embarrassment at this. He liked her. He really liked her. It felt funny but she suddenly felt like giggling.
"See you on the other side Rach." And with that he was gone.
She smiled to herself, maybe, just maybe, becoming a teenager wasn't so bad after all.
At least there was someone that was willing to wait for her.
Rachel suddenly felt brave. She could take on decommissioning. True she'd forget all her friends and what she stood for but... decommissioning took away your childhood memories, it didn't take away who you were.
She would still be Rachel McKenzie. Just short of her title 'Supreme Leader'. But that was ok, she knew that somehow, someway, she would redeem herself in the eyes of kids.
But she hadn't crossed that bridge yet.
A/N) So there you go. My last fic being the age I am now. It's kind of sad, growing up. Much of this fic is based off of my thought of growing up, which sucks. I hope it was ok. For some reason it seems like it should be more then a one shot huh... I don't know, if you guys want me too, I just might expanded this one.
TTFN
Cobwebbs