Everybody has been seriously hating on Emmett---so I felt it was only fair to give him a chance to speak. Let me know what you think of the asshole after you read his side of the story.

As always---the characters are Stephenie's---I just wish they were mine!

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Banging My Head Against the Door ---Emmett's POV

Ya know. Life is fucked up. Sometimes, when you think you're doin' the right thing--- you end up fuckin' everybody else.

Turns out, I'm a selfish man. I didn't plan to be---but I am. I put myself first when making a decision that I thought would make or break me---and fuck-- it has.

When you meet that one person who has the ability to completely change your life and make it absolutely complete, you know it; even somebody like me.

I knew I was fortunate to have met my soul mate early in my life. Rosalie Hale was a good girl ---innocent---before she took up with me. The chemistry between the two of us was like a force of nature. We couldn't help it---we couldn't control it. It was a yearning more powerful than either one of us. There was no point in resisting. We had to be together---it was like a magnetic energy or a magic spell.

I'd always admired her. The first time I ever saw her was at Football practice her freshman year. She was the hottest thing ever to slip on a junior varsity cheerleading uniform. You didn't go to a game and not notice Rosalie Hale.

I remember the first time I tasted her lips. We were playing "7 Minutes in Heaven" in Eric Yorkie's basement. I was an eager participant---there were lots of hot girls there that night. Most of them I'd already encountered, so when Rosalie's name was picked out of that hat for me, I felt like a lucky man. Little did I know how lucky.

Rosalie was being uncharacteristically shy and nervous while sitting with me on the floor of Eric's dark closet. I may have been a bit of a womanizer in high school, but I was also a gentleman. I offered her my hand and introduced myself. We had spent many evenings together on the same bus to away games or at pep rallies---but we'd never spoken a word. She accepted my hand and a sort of spark ignited in me. It was unlike anything I'd ever known. Somehow, even in that pitch black closet, I knew that this girl was different.

"Everybody out there has a certain expectation of what we're gonna do in here." I said.

Though she giggled, her voice trembled nervously. "I know."

"We don't have to do anything more than you're comfortable with." I assured her.

"Okay."

"Can I kiss you?" I asked, for the first time ever afraid of being rejected by a member of the opposite sex.

"I guess." She replied hesitantly.

I figured she just wasn't interested in me. "Nevermind---you can tell them anything you want." I said as I started to stand up.

Rosalie took my hand and gently pulled me back toward her. "I'd like to ---to---kiss you, but ---I might not----you might---you might be disappointed. Ummm---my mom doesn't let me get out much."

I couldn't believe that the hot head cheerleader with the kick-ass body I'd admired at our many football games, the one that could easily bring me to my knees in her short skirt and her wiggling hips, was offering me her very first kiss.

I placed my fingers on her flawless cheek, stroking gently with my thumb, and leaned toward her. I started out slowly, allowing her to become comfortable with our proximity first, then with the feel of my lips on hers. Before I had the chance to initiate another thing, Rosalie Hale's perfect lips parted against mine. I twisted my fingers in her ponytail trying to control my less gentlemanly parts, and allowed her full command of deepening our kiss. It was as if God himself had hand picked me the most luscious strawberry---ripe, sweet and delicious. I savored her for weeks after until I had the nerve to ask her out.

But Rosalie Hale was not permitted to date. She was far too precious to be man handled by any Forks boy. No, her mother had other plans for her. She was to attend Harvard, meet a nice law student and settle down with a man of an acceptable social status. The only reason Rosalie was at Eric's party at all, was because she'd been spending the night at Jessica Stanley's house---and Jessica's parents had few rules.

Rosalie wanted to be respectful of her mother's wishes, but our feelings knew no bounds. So, we had to see each other, hold one another--- in secret. Over time, the sneakin' around became pretty easy---old hat. We had a routine of sorts. We were pretty free on the land behind my home and we always made good use of the forest behind the gym during the school dances that followed each football game. That's where we first made love, Rose and I. I never wanted to know another woman besides her. I didn't need to. Rosalie Hale had already given me the taste of heaven I knew no other girl could possibly offer

My senior year---right before play-offs--- I sold my soul.

It was late on a Friday. Rose and I had snuck off after the game to spend some "quality time" behind the gym. That's what Rose insisted we call it. Anything else, she'd said, sounded dirty. I'd brought an old blanket this time, and some bottles of rootbeer. Rose brought grapes. She was teasing me with them---pretending to feed me and pulling them away just as I closed my mouth. I retaliated by tickling her and our playfulness, combined with carnal lust, led us to making good use of that blanket. Wrapped up in our moment, we didn't notice when the music stopped and the gym parking lot had emptied. Rose ran ahead home, terrified, knowing that her mother would be up waiting. I stayed behind to collect our belongings, erasing any sign that we'd ever been there. I didn't care what people thought of me, but I couldn't have them sullying Rose's character.

Just as I'd grabbed the blanket and folded it under my arm, I heard footsteps from within the bushes. "Who's there?" I shouted.

All I could hear was the unnerving sound of someone sucking their breath through their teeth.

I sorted through the bundle in my arms for one of the root beer bottles, unsure of what I was up against. "Come any closer and I'll fucking knock your head right off your shoulders." I warned.

"Oh---I don't think so. You will do no such thing." Said the woman whose face I could not yet make out. "Emmett Cullen, isn't it?"

"Yea---what's it to you?" I asked.

"I'll tell you ---what's it to me. It is everything to me." Her words were clipped and I could tell she was angry.

The closer she drew, the more I could make out her features. Mrs. Hale. Rosalie's mother. I had never even spoken to that woman before, but I'd heard my mother, Esme, reference her more than once. Mom worked with her on many projects as part of the Mother's booster organization at school. It was hard to get to my calm and peaceful mother, but Mrs. Hale had inspired even my mother to refer to her as a bitch on more than one occasion.

Her words slithered from her lips. "You see Emmett Cullen; I understand that you are a big deal here at Fork's High. What girl wouldn't be dazzled by the star football player? And though my Rosalie is beautiful and intelligent, she is very innocent and naive. Or at least she was before you tainted her."

I stood with my jaw open, unable to speak, my mind too preoccupied with thoughts of how long she'd actually been watching us to how the hell I was going to get out of there.

Her voice was sugary---but too much so---like Cruella DeVille luring the puppies. "So Emmett, what are your plans for the future?"

I thought this was good. Perhaps if I could impress her---if I gave her the right answer---Rosalie and I might have her blessing. "I'm hoping to get a football scholarship to State and study sports education. I'd like to be a coach someday." I was pleased with my response.

"Education. Hmmm---a very noble profession---for someone willing to spend their days living a blue collar life. No, that simply won't do for my Rosalie." She spoke as if hers was the only say that mattered.

"I mean no disrespect, Mrs. Hale. But I believe who Rosalie dates or doesn't date should be her decision."

"Is that so? I bet your mother's dream is for you to get that football scholarship, isn't it? And your father---I've watched the pride on his face at each game. How do you think they would feel if you somehow got blackballed from State? I've heard such horrible things CAN happen if you make poor decisions. In real life Emmett, who you know can and will make or break you."

I didn't answer. I got what she was saying. She was trying to bully me into believing she could prevent my scholarship, as well as, ask for a favor to benefit me. Being young and invincible, I chose to call her bluff. I continued seeing Rosalie.

The following Friday, Coach announced before the game that the scout from State would be in the stands that night. I recognized him immediately, having spotted him each year as he came to scope out the current seniors.

Just before kick-off, I noticed the scout approach Mrs. Hale. He hugged her like a long lost relative and shook Mr. Hale's hand. More than once, I noticed their heads huddled together as Rosalie's mother pointed in my direction. I was so distracted, I had trouble focusing. That night was not my best game.

At the dance that followed, when Rosalie hinted for us to escape for "quality time", I told her I wasn't in the mood. When I asked her who the man was sitting with her parents, she said it was her "Uncle Peter"---even though there was no blood-relation. He was an old and close family friend.

I received a letter from the scout from State that week. Coach gave it to me. It said that State was interested in offering me a full ride but it was contingent on my behavior for the remainder of the school year. I knew exactly what that meant.

I tried to dissuade Rosalie without purposely hurting her feelings. I loved her. I pressed that she was too good for me---which she was. But, she wouldn't hear it.

Mrs. Hale came to me with news of a girl who was perfect for me. Bella. Why she chose Bella, I don't know. I assumed that she'd heard somehow that Bella was interested in me. So I resigned myself, out of fear, to the fact that that was just how it was to be. Of course, looking back with adult eyes, I see how gullible and foolish I was---but, of course, I am in far too deep now.

I had already started working on my pursuing of Miss Swan when I learned my brother had a crush on her. Edward had never shown even the slightest interest in a member of the opposite sex his whole life. Remembering my own first crushes, I figured she was probably just the first girl that made his dick hard---and he'd move on.

So, I did what I was told. I broke Rosalie's heart, alienated my brother and dated Bella Swan. And, being the selfish ass that I am, I couldn't just date her---hell, I had to marry her.

My poor wife. Bella was so young and innocent when I first met her. She'd never even dated another guy. She tried to put me off---unsure and intimidated by the whirlwind I had to offer----but I was on a mission. She didn't have a chance.

Once I got to know her, I did love Bella---how could you not. And I was in love with the way my family took to her---well, except Edward. Now I wish he'd have stuck around more---made it harder for me to look at him. But he hid---so me, the selfish bastard, just carried on.

Once Bella and I went away to college, sticking together through ups and downs, learning to live away from home, I truly felt I was in love with her. We got an apartment together senior year and planned a wedding---it was the natural progression of things, I thought.

Then, we moved back to Forks and I ran into Rosalie Hale at the grocery store. She'd majored in business at Harvard, but missed home too much to stay away more than 2 years. She left college without even an Associate's Degree. The moment our eyes met, I could see that I was not alone in the feelings I had running like electrical currents throughout my body. From then on I tried to avoid her, but Bella decided she'd be the perfect assistant for me. And that was the beginning of the end.

I have had a very difficult time working with Rose. It's like tempting an addict with heroin. I guess, in a way, Rose is my own special brand of heroin. I should not have her, but I cannot live with out her.

Rose has never given in to my eagerness in the office. She respects Bella and has always made a point to keep her distance from me. That is --- until tonight.

Who would guess that Satan herself could have given birth to the angel before me? Rose did nothing to deserve the pain I have caused her repeatedly over the years, yet here she is, my head in her chest, stroking my hair, comforting me. She is my first love, my one true love, my Goddess. I continue sobbing, because I'm afraid if I stop, she'll leave.

I cannot allow myself to lose her again. Yet, how do I break a vow to God and purposely cause my wife heartbreak that she also does not deserve?

Who'd have guessed that one scared teenager could make a momentary decision that would cause a lifetime of pain to the people he loves the most and probably doesn't even fucking deserve?