Barry & Caitlin

Ghosts of Our Pasts

Chapter 1

Savitar watched as Barry started towards Caitlin and Cisco. He couldn't let Barry take away another thing that he loved. He finally got the girl of his dreams. He was about to become the most powerful metahuman in all the multiverse, a god even, but Barry, as always, had made those dreams come to a screeching halt, after he destroyed his suit and saved Iris from dying, which in turn destroyed any hope in Barry becoming him. And as Savitar tried to wrap his head around everything, he became angry, if Barry didn't become him, then he would never have any chance of being with Caitlin. He couldn't lose her a second time. Savitar got up and ran towards Barry, even if he was going to die soon, he couldn't let Barry ruin Caitlin's life again. He was inches away from vibrating through Barry's back when he heard a gunshot and felt his spine give way as the bullet entered through his back and out his stomach.

Barry woke with a gasp and put his hand on his back and felt a phantom pain in his spine. He rubbed his eyes and walked into the kitchen to get some water. He slipped a shirt on and watched the cars drive by, the buildings lit up the night sky. These dreams were becoming more frequent. He wasn't sure why, but with each dream came more pain, whether it be emotional or physical pain. It had been 6 months since he and Caitlin were together, it had been the best 6 months of his life until something changed in her. She decided she needed some time to think and went to live with her mother. Something that would have meant there was a problem with her. He missed her more than he could handle. He remembered her kisses than warmed his heart. He remembered their first official date. They went to Starling City and had a picnic on a cliff that overlooked the ocean. He remembered how perfectly she fit into him and how comforting it was to have her leaning against him. She smelled like vanilla. Just like the night she had gotten drunk and he had to carry her back to her apartment.

"Barry?" She asked so innocently. He turned around to face her.

"Will you stay with me until I fall asleep?" Her eyes pleaded with him.

I think that was the first time he realized that maybe there was something more than friendship between them.

"Sure, yeah." He sat down on the bed and rubbed her leg.

She fell asleep a few minutes after. Caitlin had asked him to stay until she fell asleep, but, he didn't. He stayed long after, just staring at her. She was so innocent when she slept. She had no cares in the world about anything. Whatever she was dreaming about was so content for her that she even smiled. It made him happy to know that she had some rest from the cruel world that she lived in. Suddenly she shot up from her bed and broke Barry from his thoughts.

"What's wrong?" He asked panicked, putting a hand on her arm.

"I'm gonna throw up!" Her face turned pale as she put a hand to her mouth.

He grabbed her and flashed to the bathroom, placing her over the toilet. Caitlin's body convulsed as she wretched. Barry sat behind her while holding up her hair, for the second time that night. She stopped throwing up and leaned her head back against his chest.

"That burned like hell." She whispered.

"In my opinion, Vodka is the worst liquor to throw up. That and Tequila." He wiped her mouth and forehead with a wet washcloth.

"No shit, Sherlock."

He laughed and there was silence. He scooped her up in his arms and tucked her back in bed.

Caitlin closed her eyes and mumbled. "Why did you stay?"

Barry stared at her. "What?"

"Why did you stay? I said you only had to stay until I fell asleep."

"I don't know." He looked at his hands. "I guess I felt an obligation to stay."

Caitlin slowly opened her eyes and looked at him. "You know, you act all rough and tough, but underneath it all, you're like a teddy bear."

Barry laughed loudly. "A… teddy bear?"

"Yeah. You have a button nose…" she poked his nose. "And fluffy hair."

"You're pretty drunk, aren't you?" He touched her shoulder. "Get some sleep." He got up off the bed and started walking towards the door when Caitlin said:

"You are very cute, Barry Allen."

He stopped dead in his tracks and turned around. "You're not too bad yourself, Caitlin Snow."

Barry smiled as he remembered the whole night like it was just yesterday. He hadn't realized how much he depended on her until she was out of his life. He drank the rest of his water and went to bed.

"If we don't act now, neither of us gets what we want." Killer Frost stared at Savitar. "Hello?" She knocked on his helmet. "Anybody home?"

Savitar reached up and slammed her against the wall, her back cracked loudly.

Caitlin sat up straight in her bed, rubbing her back, grunting softly.

"Ow." She whispered. Caitlin looked over at her nightstand to see her phone light up. It was Cisco.

Can you talk?

She looked at the phone again to see it was 2:00 in the morning.

Yeah sure.

The phone rang and she picked it up.

"Hey Cisco."

"Hey! How's it going?"

"Cisco, why did you want to talk at two o'clock in the morning? You do know that's usually the time when you sleep."

"Well obviously you were awake too. Or else you wouldn't have seen my text."

Caitlin sighed. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Are you ok? I haven't heard from you in a few weeks. This is the first time that you've replied to my texts or calls."

"I've been busy." She twisted her hands.

"With what?" Cisco huffed. "You just up and left three months ago and didn't tell us why."

"It's personal."

"So personal you won't even tell your best friend? Did Barry do this to you? I swear if he did something I'll vibe him across….." He didn't get to finish before Caitlin cut him off.

"It's not his fault. Cisco, I'm sick."

His voice dropped from playful to dead serious. "What? With what?"

"Stomach Cancer."

"How long have you known?"

"Three months."

He groaned. "Caitlin, I'm so sorry. Can it be treated?"

"Not so far. I've tried everything. My mom has tried everything. There really isn't much else I can do. It's pretty much a hurry up and wait situation." She chuckled slightly.

"And Killer Frost?"

"Still gone. It's like there isn't an ounce of her still in me."

"Have you talked to Barry at all?"

Caitlin's end of the phone went silent. "I haven't talked to him for 4 months, Cisco."

"You should call him, Caitlin."

"I can't do that. I love him too much. If he doesn't know it'll hurt less when I'm gone."

"Don't talk like that. What if he can fix you?"

"How would he be able to fix me?"

"I don't know, but it's worth a shot."

"I have to go. Thank you for calling."

"Wait, Caitlin!" His voice wavered. "Don't ever forget that I am here for you."

A small tear fell from Caitlin's eye. "I know."