A/N+Disclaimer: I WILL KILL YOU MATSUI
Shiota Nagisa hates Kayano Kaede.
He doesn't think he's ever hated someone so fiercely before. The hate flares up inside him and licks him clean, gives him scars, burns him from inside out. He's so weary and so tired and it's all her fault, hers hers hers and nobody else's. It hurts him so much to even look at her because he hates her so much he wishes she would just stop, stop making him hate her and please, please just become another passing face in his fifteen years of life.
He hates how her hair bounces in the wind and how, when the wind blows he can smell her shampoo and her scent that is uniquely hers and how he wishes in that instant to keep her close to him and rest his nose in her neck and feel her pulse forever.
He hates how her eyes are so fixed on her goals and only her goals because he know she's just going to get hurt from this, get so hurt that even he can't do anything but watch, get so goddamn hurt that he only hates her even more, and who likes a self-deprecating person?
He hates how she flashes Korosensei a smile and some reassurance, as if it's completely her fault that things ended up this way (even though it is and he hates her more because he knows it is, he knows it is completely her fault that she ended up like this and no one else's fault, not even his), as if she can shoulder everything with her fragile petite body that is so easily destructible.
(He's reminded of how easily a person can fade before his eyes)
He hates her, so much that he wishes she never existed in the beginning, even as he lifts her up from the red grass and screams for everyone to leave.
He wouldn't hate her so much, and maybe, she wouldn't need to see how her blood dyes the ground red.