Jane was lying on the couch inside Lisbon's office – stealing sidelong glances at the enigmatic woman that was his boss.
Her body language could get quite contradictory sometimes. Especially as far as he was concerned.
He wondered if she was aware of this. Probably not. Denial was one of her best friends, after all.
One thing was sure though. Their relationship could only be described as weird, to put it mildly.
In their own precarious way, they were friends. She was the single person he trusted completely. On her part, Lisbon mostly chose to give him the benefit of doubt – whether he actually deserved it or not.
However, he knew that their friendship was indeed balancing on the edge of a knife. Were one of them to stray just a little, and it would crumble to pieces.
Or, to be more precise, there were two possible scenarios.
The most unpleasant one was her finally giving him up – and that was for sure the most likely too. What with him still determined to exact his revenge on Red John, and the crazy stunts he had to pull in order to achieve this goal. He wouldn't blame her if she decided to cut her losses.
She should have done it many years before, as a matter of fact.
Then there was the other scenario – both pleasant and frightening at the same time. The one which he wasn't quite ready to acknowledge yet.
Part of him was still desperately in love with his dead wife and child. Add that to his burden of guilt and self-loathing, and his obsession with Red John – well, he'd better not think about this second scenario right now.
For he was now dancing on the edge of a dark precipice, without any confidence that he would come through at all.
He couldn't turn to her yet. Not while he still had to meet his doom.