A/N: just looked this chapter over again and didn't like something in the end, it's in the last paragraph. So I reposted it. But it's the same story. Like I said this isn't a Trory, though there might be some Rory-Tristan scenes, but this is a literati. ENJOY!

Courage.

That's what she needed. She had to walk into the cafeteria. It's just walking, she can do that, she has been walking for 16 years, since she was a year old. Just basic walking, skipping isn't needed, cartweels are out of the question, just walking.

Walk.

A simple word, it means a lot, walking can save lives, but then again, so can breathing, which is simpler. Natural, the most regular thing to do. But walking was different, it wasn't required, some people couldn't do it.

But she could.

Her foot moved. It moved! She took a step forward.

Moving her hand would be a little tougher. She concentrated… she couldn't do it! She was scared, she was never scared, it just wasn't part of her feelings. Yes, she cried sometimes, rarely though, but she was never scared.

They would be talking about her, a little about Him. But mainly, HER.

She hated this.

She took a deep breath, and pushed the door. It wasn't so hard! No one noticed. She walked straight to the breakfast line, waiting to be served.

At first, no one noticed, but suddenly everyone started whispering. She knew it was about her. They were looking at her in a disgusted accusing way. But, she was not going to walk out, show them her weaknesses.

And, the most important thing: she wasn't going to cry.

"hey" she heard the dreaded voice from behind her.

"no, go away" she whisperd.

"Rory, stop" Tristan said.

Why him? HIM? He was going to make this all worse.

FlashBack

She walked down the well lit corridor, enjoying the silence cause by the first period of the school day. When she got to her locker she saw it was in a newer section that was probably built the past year on account of the growing number of students in school.

"Need any help with your locker?" came a deep voice from behind her.

"no Thanks" She turned around to see a blond haired guy, around her age, probably. Very deep blue eyes and about a head taller than her.

"You sure?" he purred, leaning closer to her.

"I'm great" She said, taking a step back into the lockers.

"Why not? I'd love to help you with anything" he said quietly, placing one hand on the locker behind her, getting close, to close.

"I'm fine" she said sternly, suddenly feeling uncomfortable.

"fine, your loss" He said, letting her go.

She let go of a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding.

"What's wrong with you?" she asked angrily.

"nothing's wrong, just interested"

pause

"interested in what?" she asked suspiciously.

"everything" he said, smirking.

"oh, shut up"

"Brave, are you? Fighting with people on your first day"

"I would have fought with you eventually, it doesn't matter when" she said vainly.

"Don't you need help on your first day? It's a big campus" he retorted.

"Oh no, I'm fine. I'll find my way around, I don't need your help" she said.

"Why, am I scaring you?" he mocked.

"nope, your repulsing me, go away" she made a face indicating she found him gross.

"I'm surprised you can hide your love for me so well, you should see the look on your face, it's so twisted. You just can't hide your emotions."

"Please; just go away" she said.

"fine, I shall leave, but thou shall miss me"

And he left

End Flashback

"it's best for you that we won't be seen together" she said, trying to make him go away.

"it doesn't matter what's best for me, what happened isn't your fault or mine, but it happened to us and we will get over it together" he said quietly.

"hey stop! There is no 'us'! there is no 'we will get over it together'! there is me and only me. No you and no one else for that matter. This isn't some small conquest of yours that you can get over quickly, I'm taking this seriously because this isn't a small thing to me, it isn't just about what happened last night, it's about the past weeks in this school. I am going to get over this alone, in my slow, annoying, selfish way and you are not going to get in the way" she said, edging forward in the line, waiting to be served some eggs.

"Please don't do this, you're being extremely stupid"

"you're the one who's a moron here!" she exclaimed, a little louder than she intended to, it didn't matter though people were most likely listening anyway "this isn't your business, this doesn't have anything to do with you, just leave me alone, it's not so hard to underdstand. I know it bounces off your enormous inflating ego, but please try to understand. Bugger off!"

"fine" he said and left her, again.

And it was her doing.

It was her fault people were leaving her all the time, first her dad, she hated him for it, she wasn't even going to think about them. And Dean, and his stupid and meaningless outbursts, which usually are her fault too. Now Tristan, she made a mistake and trusted Dean, she thought and hoped that he wouldn't hurt her, she trusted him. He hurt her, but not in the way that she expected, it was her fault, but it really hurt. She couldn't do that with Tristan.

She had to do this alone.

Alone.

She was used to being alone.

The past weeks here have taught her to be a loner.

Being alone means being free, being alone means that she can decide for herself, she doesn't have to care about anyone else's opinion.

Alone is good.

A/N: hope you liked it. Review! Review! review!