Here I am! Back again for another cartoon crossover! This time, 12 teams of 2 will take part in a race around the world as I bring you a toon'd up version of CBS's Emmy Award-winning reality series, 'THE AMAZING RACE'. New Zealander Phil Keoghan will still be the host (wouldn't be 'Amazing Race' without him). ROLL IT!
Episode 1 - "They Don't Call It Amazing Race For Nothin'" (Otto)
Phil Keoghan: It's morning in Gloucester, Massachusetts - the oldest seaport in America, it was carved out of a coastline that is both dangerous...and beautiful. And from here, one of the first towns created in this country, 12 teams will embark on a race around the world for $1,000,000. We're about to begin...THE AMAZING RACE. Lobster boats are now transporting the teams to the starting line at the edge of the Atlantic Ocean. The 12 teams are...
Twister & Clio, cousins from 'Rocket Power'...
Twister: And...ACTION!
We cut to Rocket Beach, where we see a pair of Latinos, about 14 years old. They're both redheads (Note: I got a headcanon for 'Rocket Power' involving Clio and Reggie's natural hair color. (I'm sorry, but no one's hair is naturally purple!)), the boy holds a Sony camcorder, while the girl has a surfboard behind her and is wearing a green two-piece bikini.
Twister: What up? I'm Twister Rodriguez, Ocean Shores' resident videographer...that's my girly cousin, Clio.
Clio: 'Girly'? That's what you're going with?
Twister: Well, I had to think on the fly! Cut me a break, Clio!
Clio: Surprised you'd think at all, Maurice.
Twister: DON'T CALL ME THAT!
Clio: Next time, don't try messing with someone who knows how to push your Beserk Button.
Twister: I've been videotaping extreme sports since I was 7. It was Clio who got me my first video camera.
Clio: I only recently got into skating and surfboarding, thanks to your tomboy girlfriend.
Twister: Hey! Don't go making fun of your best friend, Clio!
Clio: Anyway, this show's been a part of our Sunday nights for years. Going on the race is just the tip of the iceberg.
Twister: We are athletes and we know how to win The Amazing Race.
Candace & Jeremy, dating from 'Phineas & Ferb'
We cut to Danville Park, where we see Candace and Jeremy rollerskating together on a date.
Candace: Hey, Amazing Race! I'm Candace Flynn and I think BUSTED!
Jeremy: Name's Jeremy Johnson and I think cool.
We now see clips of various 'Phineas and Ferb' episodes where Candace tries and fails to bust her brothers.
Candace: My brothers build the most insane things every single day and mom just doesn't see them!
We now see moments between Candace and Jeremy (ie. 'Canderemy', 'The Great Indoors', 'Face Your Fear', 'One Good Scare Ought To Do It!', etc.)
Jeremy: Candace and I have known each other since the 3rd grade. We've been dating 2 years now aside from Stacy, I'm the only one who knows how to keep my girl cool. Candace, some time away from your crazy brothers should do you some good.
Guy & Kelly, brother\sister from 'SheZow'
We see Guy and Maz skating on the half-pipe in front of Guy's house (a la 'SheZow' episode 1 - 'SheZow Happens'), then Kelly intervenes.
Kelly: Guy! GET DOWN HERE!
Guy: Aw, man! I was about to do my signature trick!
Kelly: 'A Guy Thing'?
Guy: Yeah.
Kelly: Guy, you are so self-centered, it's not even funny.
Guy: It's a Guy Thing, Kelly.
Jim & Tim, identical twin brothers from 'Kim Possible'
We see a pair of 13 year old boys working on a new invention in their parents garage.
Jim: Hicka-Bicka-Boo! I'm James Timothy Possible Jr., but you can call me Jim.
Tim: Hoo-sha! I'm Timothy James Possible, but call me Tim. Of course, you probably know our older sister...
Jim: Teen hero Kim Possible!
Tim: At the age of 12, we were certified as geniuses and moved up to high school.
Jim: Kim and Ron didn't like it at first, but they warmed up to it over time.
Tim: Now, we go with them on missions to save the world from evil.
Jim: Our newest mission...WINNING THE AMAZING RACE!
TJ & Vince, best friends from 'Recess'
(cue 'Recess' theme)
We are now at 3rd Street School, where a game of kickball is in progress between the 4th graders and the 5th graders. Erwin Lawson, TJ's rival, is pitching for the 5th graders against Vince Lasalle for the 4th graders. The pitch is a fastball down the middle of the plate...IT IS NO MATCH FOR THE RIGHT FOOT OF VINCE LASALLE! That ball is gone!
TJ: The name is Detwieler...TJ Detwieler. I am the man with the plan for Team Recess.
Vince: Vince Lasalle here! I'm what you might call the brawn of Team Recess.
TJ: Our school is run just like a federal prison. The only time we get any free time is...
TJ and Vince: RECESS.
Vince: But our prison guard of a playground patrolman and that snitch of an assistant are out to get us. More often than not, it's up to TJ to come up with the plan...
TJ: ...and Vince to be the raw muscle that makes that plan work so we can overthrow Ms. Finster and win our freedom.
Vince: But if we win the race, we'll have the capital to get Ms. Finster to retire at last!
TJ: This race is gonna be epic!
Randy & Heidi, dating from 'Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja'
We transition to Norrisville High, where Randy is getting off a monster battle and Heidi is about to start her webshow.
Randy: SMOKE BOMB! (smokebombs in)
Heidi: Cutting it kinda close, are we?
Randy: Maybe, Heidi. We ready to announce our 'Amazing Race' run?
Heidi: We're on! What up? It's your girl, Heidi! MAJOR STATUS UPDATE! Most of you already know me and my boy ANDY.
Randy: Name's Randy, always been Randy.
Heidi: Just like to mess with you, babe. Anyway, most of you know me and Randy. Well, you're about to be seeing us on your TV sets...
Randy: ...because we're gonna be on THE AMAZING RACE!
Heidi: Which begs the question...why didn't you want to take Howard on the show?
Randy: Wasn't quite sure if he was up for it, Heidi. Now let's win us $1,000,000.
Abby & Cree, sisters from 'Codename: Kids Next Door'
In suburban Richmond, Virginia (Note: I always thought the 'V' in Sector V stood for the state in which the sector represented.), we see Abigail Lincoln catching her sister Cree sneaking in still wearing her Teen Ninja outfit.
Abby: Busted, Cree!
Cree: Abby, I can hide it no longer...I'm a Teen Ninja.
Abby: I'm Abigail Lincoln, over there is my big sister Cree.
Cree: Hey.
Abby: Cree and I have been at each other's throats since she turned 13. I just want the fighting to stop.
Cree: I never told you this, Abby...but I want the fighting to stop, too.
Abby: Cree, you were someone I looked up to. Someone I could always count on...someone who could always lend a guiding hand.
Cree: I know, Abby. I just hope this race gives us the opportunity to end our senseless fighting and go back to the way things were between us.
Dipper & Mabel, brother\sister from 'Gravity Falls'
GRAVITY FALLS, OREGON...
Dipper: I'm Dipper Pines, that's my sister Mabel...
Mabel: YAY! GRASS! (rolls on the grass)
Dipper: And my whole world changed one day when I found this journal. Now, everywhere I go in Gravity Falls, a new mystery follows.
Mabel: We are...THE MYSTERY TWINS!
Dipper: Our next mystery to solve...HOW TO WIN AMAZING RACE.
Otto & Reggie, brother\sister from 'Rocket Power'
We cut to Madtown skate park, where we see a pair of 14 year old kids skating on the Blader Bowl.
Otto: What's up, bros? Otto Rocket here, you've probably heard of me.
Reggie: Hey there! I'm Reggie Rocket. My brother's the competitive one, while I work on my own magazine that highlights extreme sports.
Otto: I am Ocean Shores' #1 practitioner of extreme sports. Skateboarding, snowboarding, skiing, surfing...you name it, I can handle it. Rocket Girl, on the other hand...she's more down to earth.
Reggie: What I hope this race will do is get my brother to stop thinking about himself. He's just too overcompetitive!
Otto: That's my thing, Reg! I am, after all, ME!
Reggie: See what I have to deal with?
Dudley & Kitty, best friends and co-workers from 'TUFF Puppy'
Petropolis, a wretched hive of scum and villainy...this is where we find Dudley Puppy and Kitty Katswell - a pair of ordinary animals with a secret.
Dudley: HAI-KEE-GEE!
Kitty: In the name of the Turbo Undercover Fighting Force, you are under arrest, Snaptrap!
Dudley: Name - Dudley Puppy. I am the perfect mix of every breed of dog.
Kitty: I'm Kitty Katswell, I speak 120 different dialects fluently and my claws are registered as lethal weapons.
Dudley: I was a plain old dog, but when bad guys got rough in Petropolis, I started going to work for a super secret agency, where I met my best friend Kitty.
Kitty: I went through 6 years of CIA training and ended up getting paired up with this goofball right here. He may be a total klutz, but Dudley's a cool guy.
Dudley: She's got a good head on her shoulders, never trusts my instincts.
Linus & Lucy, brother\sister from 'Peanuts'
(cue 'Peanuts' theme)
Charlie Brown, the loser we've come to know and love for over 60 years, is about to go in and try and kick the football, when...
Charlie: AAAAAH! (THUD!)
Lucy takes it away from him again!
Linus: Lucy, didn't you have a signed document saying that you'd never yank that ball away from Charlie Brown?
Lucy: I did, Linus.
Linus: What happened, Lucy?
Lucy: Funny thing about that document...it was never notarized!
Charlie Brown: Good grief.
Duke & Tristan, best friends from 'Yu-Gi-Oh!'
Domino High School is our setting this time. Here is where we'll find dice game guru Duke Devlin and former school bully Tristan Taylor.
Tristan: Hey, Tristan Taylor here...
Duke: And I'm Duke Devlin, the inventor of a little game called 'Dungeon Dice Monsters'.
Tristan: You may have heard of our friend, Yugi Moto...
Duke: The King of Games himself! As for why we're on this race...Tristan may say that it's for the noble cause of anti-bullying.
Tristan: Which it is for me. I was part of the problem, I want to be part of the solution. Whatever cash prize we win will be donated to anti-bullying efforts.
Duke: See? A noble cause and I applaud Tristan for that. But I'm saying that we're on this race for a different reason...to impress Joey's sister, Serenity.
Tristan: Duke, I know you and I both have a crush on Serenity, but Joey's gonna kill us if he finds out!
Duke: Let it go, Tristan. He already knows you're in love with his sister. Let's just race around the world, man.
Phil Keoghan: Which team will figure out how to get from here to the Finish Line first? Who has what it takes to win...THE AMAZING RACE?
9 AM - Eastern Point Yacht Club
The 12 teams jumped off their lobster boats and ran to the grounds of the Eastern Point Yacht Club. There, New Zealander Phil Keoghan, the host of 'Amazing Race', was waiting for them.
Phil Keoghan: Welcome, everyone!
(the 12 teams clap and cheer loudly)
Phil: In just a few minutes, you'll begin the adventure of your lives! If you win this first leg of the race, you'll win an Express Pass. You'll also win a 2nd Express Pass that you must give to another team before the end of the 5th leg. By the way, there's another reason to bring your A-game to the start of the race. Even though there are 2 flights waiting for you at Logan Airport, the first flight only has room for 4 TEAMS and arrives 30 minutes EARLIER! At the end of each leg, there's a Pit Stop. 9 of these Pit Stops are elimination points, so you need to race as fast as you can because if you're last...you'll be eliminated. Everybody understands that, right? Okay. Your first clue is waiting inside the envelope attached to the luggage you brought with you. When I give you the word, you can run to your bags, read the clue, make your way to one of the 2014 Ford Mustangs parked out front and make your way to the airport. As always, the first team to cross the Finish Line at the end of 13 legs will win...$1,000,000! Is everybody ready?
(the 12 teams cheer)
Phil Keoghan: The world is waiting. Good luck...Travel safe...
Phil raised his right arm and arched his eyebrow to try and toy with the teams. Then...
Phil: GO!
Let the race begin!
Twister: Let's go, Clio!
Dudley: Come on, Kitty!
Randy: Pace it down, Heidi. Pace it down.
Otto: First clue, Reggie. Here it is.
ROUTE INFO:
Fly to London, England! Once there, drive yourselves to Stonehenge. You may only travel on one of 2 flights:
American #229, departing at 7:45 PM
United #1567, departing at 8:15 PM
You have $100 for this leg of the race.
Duke: Let's go, Tristan!
Tristan: I can't believe this! We are on 'The Amazing Race'!
Heidi: Go, go, go! This is so exciting! We're on Amazing Race!
Otto: They don't call this The Amazing Race for nothin'!
Twister: Saddle up, Clio! It's gonna be a wild ride!
Dudley: Let's roll, Kitty! We're gonna win ourselves $1,000,000!
(The Amazing Race season 14-22 theme)
TWISTER & CLIO...
DUDLEY & KITTY...
OTTO & REGGIE...
DUKE & TRISTAN...
LINUS & LUCY...
TJ & VINCE...
JIM & TIM...
RANDY & HEIDI...
CANDACE & JEREMY...
DIPPER & MABEL...
GUY & KELLY...
ABBY & CREE...
THE AMAZING RACE
GUY & KELLY - Brother\Sister
Guy: This is so awesome! We're on THE AMAZING RACE!
Kelly: SHE-YEAH! Okay, it tells us how to get there. What do we do?
Guy: I'll ask someone. Pardon me but do you know how to get to Logan Airport?
Local: You need Route 128.
Guy: Thanks. Bump me, Kelly! (they fist bump)
DUDLEY & KITTY - Best Friends\Co-Workers
Dudley: (reading clue) Remember, only 4 teams are allowed on the first flight.
Kitty: So get your compass out, Dudley. Your navigation skills are key here.
Kitty: (confessional) Neither of us are familiar with the Boston area, but Dudley had his compass with him and this is going to be one of our strong suits...our ability to navigate.
Kitty: (reading sign) Route 128 South - Beverly\Boston
Dudley: Right here, Kitty!
TWISTER & CLIO - Cousins
Clio: So we need to find Route 128.
Twister: I think I made the right call to let you drive here, Clio.
Clio: You'd probably wreck us out of the race if you drove, Twister.
Twister: Seems logical, Clio.
Clio: Stonehenge, So I've seen that place before.
Twister: On TV?
Clio: Yeah, because I've never been there!
LINUS & LUCY - Brother\Sister
Lucy: Hi, we're looking for Eastern Ave.
Local: That's on the other side of the city.
Linus: I told you! We were heading the wrong way!
Lucy: Should've listened to you, Linus. I just hope we get out of America here!
(LOGAN AIRPORT)
Otto: Pre-Flight Parking...right here, Rocket Girl!
Twister: Looking for Pre-Flight Parking. I think we may have missed the turn here.
Clio: Twister, I got this. Pre-Flight Parking right here. I already see a car. We're 2nd.
Duke: There's the Pre-Flight Parking, Tristan.
Tristan: 1, 2...SWEET! We're 3rd!
Randy: Glad I'm not driving here. 1, 2, 3...YES! We're on the first flight!
Otto: So, we're all looking for American Airlines. That's scheduled to get in a half hour earlier than United.
Heidi: So we're gonna have a 30 minute lead on the other 8 teams.
Randy: Appears so, Heidi.
(Ticket Counter)
Reggie: We're going to London, England. Just to confirm, no other crazy people like us have come through here?
Ticket Rep.: No, not at all.
Otto: AWESOME!
Otto & Reggie - 1st on AMERICAN AIRLINES
Twister & Clio - 2nd on AMERICAN AIRLINES
Randy & Heidi - 3rd on AMERICAN AIRLINES
Duke & Tristan - Last on AMERICAN AIRLINES
(United Airlines counter)
Dudley: We need to go to London, England. Any tickets for that flight?
Ticket Clerk: Yes, sir.
Dudley & Kitty - 1st on UNITED AIRLINES
Jim & Tim - 2nd on UNITED AIRLINES
Candace & Jeremy - 3rd on UNITED ARILINES
Linus & Lucy - 4th on UNITED AIRLINES
Abby & Cree - 5th on UNITED AIRLINES
Dipper & Mabel - 6th on UNITED AIRLINES
Guy & Kelly - 7th on UNITED AIRLINES
TJ & Vince - Last on UNITED AIRLINES
Phil Keoghan (voiceover): All teams are now on their way to London, England. Otto & Reggie, Twister & Clio, Randy & Heidi and Duke & Tristan are on the first flight which arrives 30 minutes earlier than the 2nd flight which carries Dudley & Kitty, Jim & Tim, Candace & Jeremy, Linus & Lucy, Abby & Cree, Dipper & Mabel, Guy & Kelly and TJ & Vince.
11 AM: London, England - Day 2
All teams landed in London by high noon London time. Otto and Reggie got a running start and found their Ford Focus almost instantly, as did the rest of the American Airlines group. As for the United Airlines group...Dudley and Kitty had better luck than the rest of the teams as both Jim and Tim and Dipper and Mabel couldn't find their bearings and quickly slipped to the back. However, teams like Candace and Jeremy and Guy and Kelly asked for directions from locals and surged ahead.
(Stonehenge)
DUKE & TRISTAN
Currently in 1st Place
Duke: Those are some big rocks, Tristan!
Tristan: No doubt about it, Duke! There's the cluebox!
ROUTE INFO:
Find the castle that's the opposite of nor'easter.
Phil Keoghan: Teams must now figure out that they're looking for Eastnor Castle, where they'll find their next clue.
Duke: We'll have to ask someone.
Local: It could be Eastnor Castle.
Tristan: That's the opposite of nor'easter. Why didn't I think of that?
Duke: Can you tell us where it is?
Local: It's over near Tewkesbury, I think.
Tristan: Thanks.
RANDY & HEIDI
Currently in 2nd Place
Randy: Clue time! Find the castle that's the opposite of nor'easter.
Heidi: We should try and catch up with Duke & Tristan, maybe they know.
OTTO & REGGIE
Currently in 3rd Place
Reggie: Opposite of nor'easter...
TWISTER & CLIO
Currently in 4th Place
Twister: EASTNOR CASTLE! It's Eastnor Castle!
Heidi: It's Eastnor Castle? That's the opposite? That's where we're going?
Twister: Yeah!
Heidi: Thanks, Twister!
Otto: Thanks, dude!
GUY & KELLY
Currently in 5th Place
Guy: Route Info...
ABBY & CREE
Currently in 6th Place
Cree: Find the castle...
TJ & VINCE
Currently in 7th Place
Vince: ...That's the opposite...
DUDLEY & KITTY
Currently in 8th Place
Dudley: The opposite of nor'easter.
CANDACE & JEREMY
Currently in 9th Place
Jeremy: I should know this, my family comes from England. It's Eastnor Castle.
JIM & TIM
Currently in 10th Place
Tim: Hicka-bicka-boo! I know this one! It's Eastnor Castle!
LINUS & LUCY
Currently in 11th Place
Lucy: The opposite of nor'easter?
Linus: Tim, a little help here?
Tim: It's Eastnor Castle, Linus.
Linus: Lucy, we're going to Eastnor Castle.
DIPPER & MABEL
Currently in Last Place
Dipper: Looks like we're off to Eastnor Castle, Mabel.
The road to Eastnor Castle was treacherous. Dipper and Mabel continued to struggle, while Otto and Reggie found a way around Duke and Tristan to take over the top slot and get one step closer to the Double Express Pass.
(Eastnor Castle)
Otto: There it is!
Reggie: Let's get the clue.
ROUTE INFO: Time to storm the castle!
Phil Keoghan: Teams must now try to cimb a wall at Eastnor Castle, guarded by a mob of peasants, and grab a mideval flag. Then, using one of these ancient boats, they must carefully travel across the moat to a knight in shining armor who'll give them their next clue.
This task was a serious throwback to the time of Donatello, King Arthur and Merlin. Teams had to lead a mideval army into battle and storm Eastnor Castle, then travel across the moat to one of Arthur's knights of the roundtable. Nearly everyone fell into the moat, but the positions held steady after the Active Route Marker.
4:18 PM
OTTO & REGGIE
Currently in 1st Place
Otto: We got a Roadblock, Rocket Girl!
RANDY & HEIDI
Currently in 2nd Place
Randy: ROADBLOCK...
GUY & KELLY
Currently in 3rd Place
Kelly: Who's ready...
DUKE & TRISTAN
Currenty in 4th Place
Duke: To go and battle...
TWISTER & CLIO
Currently in 5th Place
Twister: With a knight in shining armor?
Phil Keoghan: In this land of the mythic Knights of the Roundtable, teams face a Roadblock in which they must join forces with their very own knight in shining armor. Entering the tournament field, teams use a mideval weapon known as a ballista to fire melons at a knight standing 50 feet away. Once they defeat their armored opponent, they must search for a jester who'll hand them their next clue.
Roadblock Count:
Twister: 0, Clio: 1
Otto: 1, Reggie: 0
Randy: 1, Heidi: 0
Duke: 0, Tristan: 1
Dipper: 1, Mabel: 0
Jim: 1, Tim: 0
TJ: 0, Vince: 1
Guy: 1, Kelly: 0
Abigail: 1, Cree:0
Linus: 1, Lucy: 0
Dudley: 0, Kitty: 1
Candace: 0, Jeremy: 1
The Roadblock was a pain in the neck for one team as Clio had a shot ricochet and slam right into her face (a la Brook & Claire from TAR 17)! Even though Otto wasn't an accurate shot, he managed to pull through despite heavy competition from Tristan, setting up a footrace to the mat.
5:50 PM
Otto: YES! Knight...say goodbye! I believe you have a clue for us, Mr. Jester.
Reggie: Thank you very much. I'll read this one since you're a little winded.
ROUTE INFO: Search the castle grounds for the Pit Stop. HURRY! The last team to 'check in' MAY BE ELIMINATED!
Phil Keoghan: Teams must now search the sprawling grounds of Eastnor Castle for this forested meadow, the Pit Stop for this leg of the race. The first team to arrive will win the Express Pass...and a SECOND EXPRESS PASS to give to another team! And the last team to check in here...MAY BE ELIMINATED!
It was indeed a dead heat race for the Double Express Pass. The winner wouldn't be decided until the first footsteps hit the Pit Stop Mat. Then...
Otto: Let's go, Rocket Girl!
Reggie: I see Phil dead ahead! PHIL!
Otto: What's the scoop here, Phil?
Phil Keoghan: Otto & Reggie, YOU ARE TEAM #1! You have won TWO EXPRESS PASSES! One to keep and one that you must give to another team before the end of the 5th leg! Congratulations, guys! Here comes another team.
Duke: Aw, nuts!
Tristan: Just missed those Express Passes.
Phil: Duke & Tristan, you are TEAM #2!
Tristan: So close.
Tristan: (confessional) To miss out on the two Express Passes by just a few minutes...it's devastating. But I know that Duke and I can rebound from this and get first on the next leg.
5:58 PM
Phil: Guy & Kelly, you are TEAM #3!
6:05 PM
Phil: Randy & Heidi, you are TEAM #4!
6:18 PM
Phil: Jim & Tim, you are TEAM #5!
6:23 PM
Phil Keoghan: Twister & Clio, you are TEAM #6!
6:31 PM
Phil: Dudley & Kitty, you are TEAM #7!
6:43 PM
Phil: Abby & Cree, you are TEAM #8!
6:55 PM
Phil: Candace & Jeremy, you are TEAM #9! Linus & Lucy, that makes you TEAM #10!
7:26 PM
Phil: TJ & Vince, you are TEAM #11! STILL IN THE RACE!
8:45 PM
Phil Keoghan: Dipper & Mabel, you're the last team to arrive. I'm sorry to tell you that you have been eliminated from the race.
Dipper: We deserved it. We were terrible today.
(end credits)
NEXT TIME:
- Teams head for Ghana, where they have to do some 'shady deals'.
- One team may 'Tune In' to victory.
- CAUTION: DOUBLE U-TURN AHEAD!
STAY TUNED!