Prologue: Goodbye
Ichigo. Because I love you I will make you the last one I see. Because I love you I wont wake you. Because I love you I wont let you know.
Ichigo.
Ichigo.
...Ichigo.
I want to touch you. Do you have any idea what kind of thoughts run through my mind when I see you? I am more passionate than I look. I almost cant help but want to lean down and...
But I wont. I dont want to wake you. It wont fit that character I show everyone If I just did whatever I wanted. The character of a little sister. A sweet girl. You prefer a good girl. Everyone does.
My brother did.
It wont be long now though.
Ill toss my love away when I go. We will never see each other again. Its only right, you shouldn't be burdened with someone like me.
Goodbye Ichigo.
Chapter 1: Ulquiorra
This man, Ulquiorra, is terrible. I would describe him as a doll. Fallowing him down the halls of this white expanse of a palace isn't fun. But he is somewhat interesting to watch. Ahh... I have never been able to control my thoughts have I? A natural pervert. His eyes chill me in a strange way. His hair looks soft, I like to imagine what its like to pull it.
But I wont. That would be sick. That would make me look less like the "little girl" he thinks I am. I dont really care what he thinks to be honest but, I am used to acting a certain way. Ill shiver in 'fear' when he reaches out to touch me. Ill flush in 'rage' when he try's to control me. Ill submit because that is the easy path.
Still, I dont feel anything for this man really. Not like ichigo. I am just a pervert.
He sure is nice to look at. I bring my hand up to my mouth and bite my nails. The longer I watch him the harder I bite.
I am such a monster.
As he turns he says in that sultry monotone voice, "We are here." Inwardly I sigh and wonder what it would be like to hear his voice shake. Outwardly I look resolute, barely containing fear.
Chapter 2: Aizen
So this is Aizen. What a terrifying man. I would describe him as devilish. Sexy. His eyes dont run up and down my body like I want them to. To bad. It would be better for me to be afraid. Its easy to look afraid though because I am. He would kill me. I can see it. He also wants to use me. Which turns me on in a way but also disgusts me. He looks at me like he knows what I am thinking.
I doubt that. His tone says that he knows I am a afraid. That is all he knows. Good.
Oh how I would like a way to tie him to a bed and force him down.
...did I just seriously think that?
Sick.
I wonder what type of girl he prefers. Probably a good girl.
Actually, maybe a man like this is a pervert like me. He got pretty close, smelling my hair, touching my skin.
It would be bad to indulge but I want to inhale him.
He tells me all my friends are dead.
I don't believe him. So I may as well pretend I do.
I cry.
He seems to be entertained by this. What a sadist. I want to...
I better stop thinking that train of thought.
Actually... now that I think about it... why am I holding back anymore? Who am I trying to impress? What do I care if these people think I am innocent? I watch as he turns around. I mean really watch. His hair his looks like it would be fun to twirl around. His skin looks like it would mark nicely. So perfect.
Not that I would know. I am in a way 'innocent'. I just happen to be imaginative in all the wrong ways.
I felt my face relax into an expression I never showed in public. I know this face. I never seen it personally but I know its dirty. The smile creeping up on my tear stained cheeks must be unnatural.
Hah. Its kinda comical really. I wonder if I should try it...
Doing what I want.
I walk a few steps forward toward Aizen.
I wonder if I should do it.
Touch him.
Just a little.
Nothing dirty.
I reach my hand forward a bit. You know I feel kinda mystified I think? But before I can reach him I am stopped by a set of eyes.
Ulquiorra.
He is watching me in a curious way. A dangerous way. A way that says "Take another step and you will die". Instantly the spell breaks and I fall back into the act. My face clenches up in mock fear. I hold my hands together and bring them to the center of my chest like a prayer.
I guess old habits die hard.
Aizen leaves through the hole he made. I am alone with those eyes now. I inwardly sigh. I guess I better say something.
"Y-your not going to fallow him?"
He is so fast in an instant Ulquiorra is in front of me leveling his face with my own.
"What were you thinking of doing.", He asks carefully.
"I... I was just going to ask where he was going."
He tilts his head a bit and examines my eyes. We stand like this for several moments before he pulls away.
"You are lying." he concludes.
Well... he isn't wrong.
"No.. I really..."
He grabs my dress and tosses me into a pillar. Ow. When I look up and see him standing above me.
"You have been lying this whole time. Fooling everyone. What are you really thinking?"
I have to think of something.
"I was thinking that... I was..."
He hits me hard in the stomach, I start hacking up . Looking up at his eyes I began to feel enraged. Fine. I give him my bright and innocent smile and say in the sweetest voice I had...
"I was thinking about touching him. Just a little."
Ulquiorra doesn't react. He doesn't say anything. He just gets really still. I let out a harsh laugh and let my face rest into a more comfortable expression.
"Whats the matter Ulquiorra? Did I say something weird?"
He blinks then says, "What do you mean 'touching him'? Did you try to attack him?"
I felt my sweet expression twist. Its so weird acting this way.
"No, did I look that stupid to you? I wanted to run my hand up his back or maybe I wanted to trace the muscles on his arms. I don't know, I didn't get to try."
The silence afterward is awkward. But frankly I feel relieved. So I get up and examine Ulquiorra.
He doesn't move. I don't think he understands; that's ok. I wonder... heheh. This question I am about to ask is pretty bold I think so... Why not?
"Ulquiorra... can I experiment with you?"
He goes stiff again and backs away from me. Oh did he find that disgusting? Heheh.. HAHAHA.
"What do you mean by that..." He asks.
Tch. Maybe he is a virgin... so am I but... Oh I get it. He probably actually a good boy. The real deal.
"I mean that I want to try out different ways of touching you."
"You mean like how you were going to touch Aizen..."
I get close and smell him. Oh he smells wonderful, clean...
"Yea... like that."
He thinks about it then says "Ok?"
He really doesn't get it? I wonder if he will get it after I run my fingers up his stomach. He doesn't react.
"That's it?" he says.
Shit. Ok... You know what? I am going to lick him. I gently push him into a near by wall and lean over to whisper in his ear like I am telling him a dirty little secret.
"You have no idea what I mean by 'touching' do you?"
Gently I began to trace his one of his ears with the tip of my tongue before nibbling its lobe. I wonder if they are sensitive? I wait for him to react. He doesn't move, his breathing doesn't change. Nothing. I look at his face and it appears unchanged.
There must be something wrong with him. Maybe I am not his type? Or maybe...
"Are you gay?"
His lips tip into a small smile before he leans forward. Close enough that our noses touch. The air feels like its changed somehow after that. He looks me in the eyes and whispers "No." then he leans a bit more in and gets close to my ear, in way mimicking my motions before and says, "But I think I understand now what you meant when you said you wanted to experiment with me."
He then harshly pushes me away.
"I see my initial assessment of your personality was wrong Inoue. I have some advice, Lord Aizen is not someone you want to play with. So don't try to "touch" him. I wont stop you, but I doubt you want to become useless. If you become useless you will die."
I look at him a bit processing what he said before asking "So I can use you then?"
And for the first time he really smiled. I mean really smiled. It was kinda creepy.
"No." he said delicately before walking away and dispersing into nothing.
Well there goes my confidence as a woman. Son of a bitch. I am going to rape him.
Oh god I am so fucked up.