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Sliding Doors

From the ground to the top floor—that's the only time you have to make your case. If you're lucky, there will just be two of you inside and you have all of 60 seconds to say all that you've rehearsed in your mind. If you're a little out of luck, then it will stop at every floor and pick up noisy people who will chatter away whatever time you have in that small confined space, walls plastered with flyers and posters of things you'd never even remember. But if it's one of those days, you'll catch the doors before they slide and make you wish you took the stairs just this once.

Inhale.

She watched as his hand automatically shot out to block the elevators but he was too late. They were already trapped. The words rushed to her lips but her voice never found its way because she could only concentrate on breathing, getting out and wanting every second to stretch out a bit longer until she could finally face him.

Exhale.

He wanted to smash his phone to little pieces for distracting him from seeing she was in the elevator before getting in. He looked at her a second too long before deciding to turn around and abate whatever encounter they were about to have. And so the doors closed in his face.

Inhale.

She couldn't see very well anymore. Her lower lip trembled and biting it was not effective. It wouldn't be long now before the tears fell. They were silent but she recalled their conversation outside the hospital like it was on speakers at full blast. She could see the shock, the anger and the resentment all over again like a movie in her mind on a loop. But she never found the courage to turn around and see him look at her hesitantly, quietly clutching his phone as he leaned against the wall behind them.

Exhale.

He tried to look at all the posters and floor numbers light up as they passed each one. But his eyes were just drawn to her struggle and he couldn't look away. e wathe He watched her struggle against the tears and he didn't want her to lose that fight. His body wanted a reason to reach out and comfort her and his heart needed him to understand he still loved her in spite of everything.

Inhale.

With on heaving sob, she stepped out of the temporary prison the moment it opened. It wasn't even her floor. It didn't matter. It was suffocating to be around him. She couldn't breathe with her guilt and his disgust weighing in on her. She couldn't breathe feeling like he never cared at all, at least not enough to fight and get past what she did—what they did. She couldn't think about anything other than knowing for sure that she loved him—finally and only when it was too late.

Exhale.

For the second time, he reacted too late. His hands were reaching out but she practically flew out of the elevator. His hand closed into a fist as he stared after her, deliberating whether to run after her and call out her name. He wanted to love her again but he couldn't and the doors closed on him again.

It only lasted 20 seconds but everything that needed to be said was never spoken yet it was heard loud and clear.

It won't work out.

I hate you.

I need you.

I'm here for you.

I'm not going to hurt you.

I'm sorry.

I love you.

I love you too.

It's over.

It's over.