Warning: this fanfiction may cause you to rip out your hair/eye balls. WE are not responsible for any damage you do to yourself when you realize how horrible WE are at writing. Emphasis on we there are two of us :P. anyways we don't own anything, well actually I think I own myself wait, no that's my parents WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS WORLD?!
Percy's P.O.V
Banana. Ice cream. Horse. Wait, why am I saying random words? Why am I on the floor? Where am I? Oh wait that's right I passed out on the toilet no wonder my head hurts so much. Wait, I didn't Have that many beers last night did I? oh well. Better go find Annabeth I thought as I lazily lumbered out of the bathroom.
I opened the bathroom door to find a huge audience of gods watching me. Slamming the door I went back into the washroom. What the heck was I doing last night. If only I could remember, im never consuming another drop of any alcoholic beverage again, or until next time there's a party.
"Open up! As leader of the gods I…" "Yeah, yeah I know, I must get my lazy butt out of the washroom right now, I know" I said cutting him off. I looked in the mirror before opening the door again, but instantly regretted it. It would have been much better if I didn't know how horrible I looked. But I couldn't waste anymore time before facing the gods or I would be blasted to pieces for disobeying "all powerful lord Zeus". No matter how bad I looked now a pile of ashes would look a whole lot worse.
I opened the door and walked out "What?"I asked demandingly. "You interrupted my morning poo." "my dear boy is that anyway to address a god? Also you may want to consider cleaning yourself up a bit the next time you are in my presence." Said Zeus, annoyingly I might add. "Any ways we are here to tell you that we need you to run some errands for us" He said. I rolled my eyes. I defeat gea and suddenly I get the 'honor' of doing things for the gods like delivering mail while hermes is away, buying more more perfume for Aphrodite, sharpening Ares's swords etc… gee aren't I special.
"What an honor lord Zeus, have you run out of toilet paper already?" I said with a smirk "Or is it the cream for your rash?" I knew I was pushing my luck but I figured that the gods would be lost without me so I continued. "or maybe you want to send me on quests to defeat your enemies, because you came up with an excuse as to why you couldn't do it yourself"
Zeus glared at me as I resisted the urge to smile. "I need you to go tell Artemis that I'm holding a ball in two days." He said gruffly, handing me an envelope . "Oh I see I get to go grace Artemis with my presence. Very well. Bye!" I said cheerfully walking back into the bathroom and slamming the door in his face. Gods I hate the gods.
I decided that while I was in the washroom I might as well take a shower. I stood in the shower for ages making the water into the shape of a sword then transforming it into a stick figure man who did a back flip before turning into a miniature model of Annabeth. I'd gotten better at controlling the water and now I could pretty much do anything I want with it, though I'm still not that great of an artist (the miniature Annabeth was basically a stick person with long wavy hair). After the shower I felt more relaxed and regretted what I'd said to one of the most powerful gods, I knew he'd get back at me and that was almost worse than it being a surprise.
After my shower I willed the water off my body, got dressed and left the washroom to go look for Annabeth. I found her passed out on the kitchen floor along with Grover. Nice to see I wasn't the only one who drank too much last night, I thought as I filled a bucket of cold water.
Annabeth's P.O.V.
*SPLASH*
I stood behind Percy with my knife at his throat before I even realized what had happened. When it registered that Percy had only dumped water on me I lowered my knife and took a step back. "Dry me off now!" I have never been a morning person and a pounding headache didn't help my mood. Smirking, Percy dried me off then it was Grover's turn to wake up muttering curses in ancient Greek.
"What was that for?" I asked after both Grover and I had been dried off. " I have to go tell Artemis about the ball Zeus is throwing and wondered if you guys wanted to come with" he said. I raised my eyebrows "Seriously? Why can't Zeus do it himself?" I asked. "I don't know. But Zeus gets what Zeus wants" he said with a sigh. "Yeah alright I'll go" I said Grover nodded in agreement and we headed out the door and into Percy's porch.
"So how are we going to find Artemis?" Percy asked, he really doesn't think sometimes. Like always I'm the one with the plan. So I replied "We call Thalia, Seaweed brain." I have to admit Percy's son of Poseidon thing really comes in handy sometimes. It was easy to find a puddle still there from the previous day's rain, then all we needed was for Percy to make it form a rainbow. Tossing my gold drachma into the rainbow I recited, "Iris, Goddess of the rainbow except my offering, show me Thalia." And instantly Thalia appeared on a misty screen. Although it didn't go as well as I had hoped she was in the middle of trying to shoot a deer when I called her so her scream of surprise scared the deer away.
"Gods Annabeth you made me scare the deer away!" she whined "I was going to eat that for dinner." " Yeah… sorry about that. But I need to know where Artemis is" I apologized. "Artemis? Oh well she's um well it's a long story involving cheese." Said Thaila "I'm listening" I replied.
Thalia told us all about what happened, but 3 more gold drachmas later she still hadn't told us where Artemis is. "…then we figured out that it actually wasn't cheese, and Hecate had turned Lady Artemis into the cheese so they had to figure out …" I cut Thalia off. "Thalia I already used up all my gold drachmas , we really only want to know where Artemis is right now." Thalia didn't seem to care that I hadn't let her finish her story. "Oh that's easy, she's with the hunters near Ottawa I'll email you the exact location." replied Thalia. Satisfied with that answer I said goodbye and waved my hand through the mist, disconnecting the signal.
"Where to?" asked percy. "Ottawa. Thalias going to email us the exact location later, but for now just go to Ottawa." I said.
Percy's P.O.V. (10 excruciating hours later)
"Are we almost there. It's like 8:00, I've wasted my whole day on a godly errand." I said for what must be the 20th time. I knew I was whining but I think at this point I had the right to be miserable. Grover was still asleep (he'd been asleep for the last 5 hours) and was starting to mumble something about peanut butter and pickles. Annabeth was driving the car that they had "borrowed" and she looked like she was regretting coming on this trip.
Finally the GPS had told us that we had "arrived at our destination" and I jumped out of the car before Annabeth had finished parking at the Tim Horton's (Eh?). Grover seemed to notice that we had stopped and woke up. We all went in and ordered donuts and coffee.
I hated to ask it but I had to " So is this just another pit stop or are we actually here?" Annabeth shook her head no we're actually here. I think we should just leave the car here and hike the rest of the way into the forest it's not that far but there aren't any roads, though I'd feel safer with a car." I automatically looked around for monsters, I was actually surprised we hadn't run into any monsters yet. I mean we saw some Pegasus on the car ride and I thought I saw some bright red cows mixed in with some of the normal ones on a farm, but that was pretty much it. Something about that made me uneasy.
Unfortunately I was right about half way to the forest we came across a Cyclops.
At first I thought it might be a good Cyclops like Tyson, but when I got closer I could tell that this was no peanut butter loving, little brother. I uncapped riptide as the Cyclops turned around and stared at us with its eye. The three of us had been fighting together for so long that we immediately knew what to do. Annabeth and I snuck around the sides of the monster as Grover distracted it by playing magical songs on his reed (he had gotten much better over the last year). Annabeth struck the monster first, which caught its attention, though it did seem to be hurt. I jumped on its back and started climbing and the monster stopped focusing on Annabeth and instead on the person tugging on his greasy back hair. Just as I was about to stick my sword through the monsters head I heard Annabeth yell "Percy!" I ducked before realizing that it hadn't been Annabeth who had spoken. The Cyclops had just spoken with her voice. He felt the Cyclops hand close around him and he tried to break free but in the confusion he had dropped riptide, and even if it returned to his pocket he couldn't get to it. All he could do was watch as Annabeth slashed at the monster's leg and struggled to help him. Grover was playing a song meant to make the Cyclops fall asleep but he could see Annabeth trying to keep her eyes open. All in all it wasn't going well.
Suddenly clusters of arrows sprouted from the Cyclops's eye, forehead and chest. He howled in pain and dropped me. I fell to the ground winded and unable to move. "Percy!" screamed Annabeth as she rushed to my side, to drag me out of the way of the falling Cyclops. But she was too late.
Annabeth's P.O.V
I watched in horror as 4000 pounds of wounded Cyclops came crashing down towards Percy. "Percy!" I screamed again. I tried to move, to save Percy, but horror rooted me to the ground and all I could do was watch. But to my surprise the Cyclops didn't crush Percy instead at the very last second it dissolved into sand. I said a silent thank you to the gods and rushed over.
When I got to Percy his face was pale and a section of his forehead seemed unusually flat. "are you all right I asked gulping back the acid rising from my stomach. "mmmph hmmmummmph" he said through a mouthful of sand. Quickly I rolled him on his side so he could spit it out. And pawed through my bag for ambrosia and some water.
I helped him raise the water to his lips so he could rinse out all the sand, and fed him a piece of ambrosia squared. I watched with relief as his forehead mended itself and the colour came back to his face. "Thanks" he said and I helped him up.
Only then did I think of where the arrows had come from. As soon as I thought about it I realized how stupid I was being, duh we're looking for the hunters. Confirming my suspicion Thalia appeared followed by a large group of girls between the ages of 10 and 14.
I hadn't seen Thalia in ages , I ran up to her and gave her a hug. Thalia gave Percy and Grover a hug too, and I saw that it made the rest of the hunters uneasy. But it's a bit rude to shoot your leader's best friends so I figured they wouldn't shoot them, for now at least.
Percy's P.O.V.
"Now do you see why I hate the gods so much? And all their little 'honour quests'? I swear ever time they ask me to do something for them I always end up almost dying. I'm beginning to think they are trying to murder me." I explain to Thalia on our way to Artemis. "Ya..." She replied. A few minutes of running we arrive at camp from the outside it looks like a regular camp but on the inside its very luxurious with decorations, pillows and blankets. Thalia leads us into one of the three white tents. Sitting on a blanket surrounded by pillows sits Artemis. She looks up from sharpening arrows. She looks confused at first, but quickly her expression changes to a warm smile. "Annabeth, Percy, Grover. It's nice to see you" she says "What brings you here?" "Percy has an invitation for you from zeus" replies Annabeth and I hand Artemis the envelop from Zeus.
She opens the envelope and a look of shock spreads across her face. "Percy... This isn't an invitation to a ball." She said sadly. "These are orders to kill you." And with that she raised her now and shot me.
THE END! Yes we know you probably hate us now but it's way better then her going to a ball. That would be wayyyyy to boring so ya we ended it this way please review :).