I'll
Be Okay
Based
on the song of the same name by Amanda Marshall
Thanks, as always, to Allie for the super Beta job.
I'll be okay. That's what I told him when Enterprise finished her first mission. He had announced that he wasn't going to be back, having had enough of the space adventure and wanting to try something new, a family. Everybody said the same thing; we'll miss you, you're welcome back any time and have fun, Trip.
We spent our last night together drinking far too much and having far too much fun. T'Pol stopped by a couple of times to try and get Archer to look over some last minute things but gave up when he told her she'd have to drink if she wanted that PADD looked at. We laughed as she raised an eyebrow and turned on her heel before leaving.
"I'll miss ya, Hosh," he told me the next morning, both of us whispering in the dark to try and keep the pounding in our heads to a minimum.
"You don't have to leave. Starfleet's already looking into the fraternization rule, you might find some body on the ship," I said.
"Nah," he said. "I been hangin' 'roud y'all too long. It jest feels kinda weird to think about somethin' like that," he said.
I was surprised to feel like I had swallowed a lead weight when he said that.
"Oh," I said lamely. "Well, I guess all I can say is that I hope you find the right girl, Trip." He smiled as we stopped out side the shuttle bay.
"Maybe you should come down fer a bit, mill around," he suggested. "I'll take ya home and introduce ya to momma, take ya around town. You might find the right guy."
I smiled.
"It's okay," I said. "I, uh, I guess you should go," I said as I saw the last of the pre-flight crews move away from the shuttle.
"Oh. I guess yer right," he said. He dropped his bags and gave me a hug. "I'll really miss ya, I mean it. You gonna be okay?" he asked one last time.
"I'll be okay," I told him. "Go," I shooed him away.
He climbed on the shuttle with one last wave and I wandered off, still feeling like I had swallowed a led weight. I sighed as I wandered, ending up in the mess deck just in time to watch his shuttle fly off and it hit me.
I had fallen in love with him some where along the line and now I had lost him forever. I had a feeling that I wouldn't be okay as I had told him I would, but fate has a way of changing, when you don't want it to and there's not a whole lot you can do about it. Until love comes again, I'll be okay.