The usual non-ownership of any characters disclaimer applies here, too bad of course, but true.
A/N: This is a sequel to "Finding His Future". Thanks for your reviews of that story. Cyd the Squid wondered in a review how Gibbs would react to Kate telling him she was going back to Iraq and this is the result of that question. I hope you enjoy. Reviews are always appreciated and enjoyed.
Working it Out
Kate Todd was feeling anxious and frustrated, happy and nervous and hungry all at the same time. She was anxious to get home and out of her work clothes into something more comfortable. The pace of traffic even at 4:00 in the afternoon was impeding that goal and causing a rising level of frustration. Since last week when she quite unexpectedly ran into Jethro Gibbs at Arlington Cemetery of all places, she had been happier than she had been in over a year. Their chance meeting had led to a quiet dinner, a very heartfelt and revealing conversation and finally some very intense and satisfying lovemaking. Friday night had run over into Saturday morning and before she knew it they had spent the weekend together. It wasn't all sex and carrying on; most of it was, but there was some talking too. And eating and laughing and crying and holding each other while laughing and crying. Overall it had been a really good weekend.
Monday brought with it a big dose of reality because they both had to go back to work. Right now her work involved going to an office at the Department of Defense, sifting through the photos and films she had taken in Iraq last month and putting them in some kind of order, then writing a narrative to accompany each piece. She had been very busy this past week but next week would be a little quieter as she was preparing to go back to Iraq in five days. Of course Jethro didn't know that which was what she was nervous about. Kate had kept her departure date from him intentionally because she knew it was going to be a difficult conversation to have and she wanted to avoid it as long as possible. That hadn't been hard to do because Jethro had been wrapped up in a case most of the week and they had barely seen each other from Tuesday morning until very late last night when he finally drug himself to her apartment at almost 2:00 am.
After they had spent the weekend together, Kate had stayed over Monday night at Jethro's house but she had not been back since she left for work on Tuesday morning. With him working and not going home, Kate had stayed at her own place taking some time to catch her breath and make sure she knew what she was getting herself into. It had all happened so fast that she was just a little shell shocked and had needed the few days alone to take stock of her feelings. Being back with Jethro after almost a year apart was not what she had expected for herself but these past few days had shown her that she truly wanted to be with him. Kate knew she loved Jethro and she was determined to do her share to make their relationship successful. He was definitely a different person now that he had told her about his first wife and daughter. He was much more open and trusting and he had made it very clear to her that he wanted her in his life. Now all she had to do was survive telling him that in five days she was going back to a war zone for a month. Just thinking about that all day had her stomach in a knot and kept her from eating anything. No wonder she was so hungry!
Finally, just before 5:00 Kate arrived home and quickly changed her clothes. She packed a bag for the weekend since she was planning to stay with Jethro and was back in her car and on the way to his house by 5:20. On the drive over, Kate reflected on the changes in her life in the last week. Just a week ago she was content with how things were going. She had an interesting, if somewhat dangerous job that she loved and she had friends she could spend time with when she was at home. It had taken several months for her to feel okay about life after she and Jethro stopped seeing each other last year but things were finally going well. Then she ran into HIM and within 12 hours her life had taken another 180 degree turn and she found herself going in an entirely new direction. As scary as that was, Kate was happier than she would have ever thought possible just a few months ago.
She smiled, something she was doing a lot of these days, when she remembered telling her best friend on Tuesday that she was seeing Jethro again. Julie had been furious with her. She reminded Kate of all the nights she had cried over Jethro never calling, she reminded her of all the ugly things she had said about him and the names she had called him when they were drunk together. Eventually, Julie had calmed down and asked her why? Why was she willing to put herself through it all again? Why was she willing to give him another chance after all this time.
It hadn't taken Kate very long to answer those questions because she had been asking them herself that entire day. As the two friends had shared some beers and a pizza Kate explain what had happened last Friday. She told Julie that the reasons were simple; she loved Jethro more than she had ever loved anyone else. She said he was the best man she knew, he was willing to make some changes for them and he wanted to be with her. Kate tried to explain that she felt completely safe when she was with Jethro; safe from anything or anyone who might harm her. She told her how she couldn't stop looking at him when she was with him. She couldn't get enough of him; his touch, his voice, just the way he looked at her made her heart race. Kate tried to explain that his eyes were mesmerizing and his hands were magical but Julie was just laughing at her by now. When she tried to tell Julie that he was the best kisser she had ever kissed, her friend surrendered and told her she understood and hoped they would be very happy for years to come. Kate assured her they would and she believed that with all her heart.
But first she had to tell him she was leaving for a month on Wednesday. And that's why she was on her way to his house right now. She was planning to feed him her homemade spaghetti sauce, ply him with wine, seduce him, and then forget about leaving for the next two days at least. That was the plan anyway.
While Kate was starting her 'spaghetti sauce plan', Special Agent Jethro Gibbs was still at work. Sitting at his desk, he rubbed his eyes and tried to focus on the computer screen in front of him. He was tired and he wanted to go home. It was after 6:00 and he had already sent his team home for the weekend. Just one more paragraph and he would have this damn report finished. The past three days had been crazy and he hadn't had much sleep or food in that time. When he left his house, and Kate, on Tuesday morning he had no idea he wouldn't see her again until very, very early this morning. But, murder and kidnapping cases sometimes worked that way so they did what they had to do and they finally caught the bad guy. Now all he could think about was a hot shower, a stiff drink and Kate, not necessarily in that order.
Being able to knock on her door at 2:00 in the morning and have her welcome him in with no hesitation was an entirely new experience and one that he greatly appreciated. His ex-wives had always been angry and suspicious when he was gone for several days and then came home in the middle of the night. Kate, on the other hand, just opened the door and hugged him and took him to her bed, no questions asked and no pouting about him being gone. If for no other reason, last night had proven it, he had struck gold with Kate Todd. Now if he could just get out of the office and go home they could get started on another weekend together.
Jethro was about to leave the office when Dr. Mallard arrived in the squadroom on his way home. "I was afraid I might find you here, Jethro. Are you about ready to leave?"
"Yeah, Duck I'm just finishing up. You're here kinda late on a Friday." Jethro gathered his belongings and the two men started toward the elevator.
"Well, mother is with some friends tonight so I don't have to hurry. I wanted to get some paperwork done in case next week turns into what we experienced this week. How is Caitlyn by the way?"
Jethro smiled at his old friend and replied, "When I saw her this morning she was fine."
"You saw her before work today?"
"Yes. Actually I went to her apartment when we finished this morning."
"Jethro, that was almost 2:00 am. What were you thinking going there at that time of the night?"
"I was thinking if I didn't see her I was going to lose my mind, or what was left of it anyway. Ducky she was fine with me being there. I admit I was a little worried but I just had to see her and be with her so I took a chance. Maybe I was testing her, I don't know. Anyway, if I was she passed with flying colors. She was actually happy to see me, let me right in, fed me and took me to bed. What more could I ask for?"
"What more indeed!! Just don't screw it up my friend. Any woman that lets you in her house in the condition you were in this morning is a woman you need to hold onto at all costs. When does she go back to Iraq?"
"Next week. She doesn't know I know and she's not talking about it."
"Then how do you know?" They stepped off the elevator and started for their cars.
"I have a friend at DOD who knows Kate. He let it slip a couple of days ago when I ran into him at the coffee shop. I guess Kate told him we were back together and he figured I knew. I haven't told her I know because I don't want to spoil our time together. Plus, I want to see how long she's going to wait to tell me."
"Another 'test', Jethro? That may not be a good idea."
"No. At least I don't mean it that way. Mainly I'm still working out how I feel about her going back over there and how I'm going to deal with it. I'm probably just avoiding it like she is. I'm not sure I can do this Duck."
Ducky stopped walking and placed his hand on Jethro's arm stopping him as well. "Hard when the shoe is on the other foot isn't it? If you truly love her Jethro you will find a way to work it out. You will have to put your fears on hold like other people do when their loved ones are deployed. I know how you feel about protecting the people you love but there are limits. This is what she does now and you will have to accept it and support her. Just like Shannon did for you."
"I know. You're right, it is hard when it's the other person leaving me behind. We will work it out though because you are also right about me needing to hang onto Kate. Now, come on, let's get out of here."
Jethro and Ducky made their way across the parking garage and bid each other good night as they got into their cars and started for their respective homes. Jethro hadn't gone far when his phone rang. 'This better not be work related' he thought as he reached for the annoying device.
"Gibbs."
"Hi, are you on your way home by any chance?"
"Hi, yes I just left a few minutes ago. Are you coming to my house? Please, say you're already on your way."
"As a matter of fact I'm in your kitchen fixing us dinner. Could you stop and pick up some wine? I thought we had some but we don't."
"Sure, red or white?"
"We're having spaghetti so get whichever you want. I don't care one bit.
"Okay, I'll be there in twenty." Jethro closed the phone and pushed on the accelerator. Luckily there was good wine place on the way to his house. True to his word, he pulled into the driveway almost exactly twenty minutes later. He took a few minutes in the car to gather his thoughts and remind himself of what Ducky had said. When he stepped into the house he was greeted with the aroma of homemade spaghetti sauce. The real treat however was in kitchen and it wasn't the sauce; it was Kate, wearing shorts and tank top, bent over with her head in fridge. Jethro just stood in the doorway admiring the view with his famous smirk firmly in place.
Too soon Kate stood up and smiled at him, "Are you just going to stand there gawking or are you going to kiss me?"
"I think I'll kiss you." Jethro put the wine on the table, handed Kate the flowers he'd bought her then wrapped her in his arms and proceeded to kiss her senseless while backing her against the pantry door. Only because he needed to breathe did he finally let Kate go and step back to look at her.
"Thank you. For the kiss and the flowers. I sure have missed you these past few days."
Jethro just stood there looking at her for so long she began to get nervous. Finally he reached out and took the flowers from her placing them on the counter. When he spoke his voice was full of emotion. "I've missed you too. You have no idea what it meant to me to be able to just show up at your apartment this morning and be welcome there. I can't put into words how much I appreciate you being there for me. That hasn't happened in a very long time. Thank you Katie."
Kate wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head on his chest. "Oh Jethro, you're welcome. I don't know what else I could have possibly done considering how much I love you and how damn happy I was to see you."
Jethro laughed and said, "Well, someday I might tell you what else you could have done. Not that I think you'd ever do them or that I'd want you to by any means, but trust me, there are other things that have been done in that circumstance. But forget that. I want to concentrate on you and us for the next few days."
Kate tried not to flinch when he said that. She wondered if he had some inkling that she was leaving soon. She looked up at him and tried to read his eyes but all she could see was love and trust and maybe something that would have to wait until after supper. "Why don't you go up and change while I put the pasta in and we can eat in about twenty minutes."
Jethro leaned down and kissed her one more time, "Okay. Let me open the wine first."
He disappeared up the stairs and Kate went back to preparing their meal. When Jethro returned he helped Kate with the salad and the bread and they sat down to enjoy their first meal together in almost a week. Conversation was easy between them and when they finished eating they took a glass of wine and went to sit outside and enjoy the warm evening. No mention was made of Kate leaving or even of her job at all. For the most part they were content just to be together after a hectic week and enjoy each other's company. Kate understood that Jethro often needed a lot of quiet time to decompress from his job and she was happy to give him that time especially after a case like he had dealt with this past week. As the evening began to cool off, Kate snuggled closer to Jethro and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. Pretty soon her hand was snaking under his shirt tracing circles on his chest. Not long after that Jethro stood up and taking her hand he pulled her up as well.
"Why don't we take this in the house?"
"Good idea."
When they got in the house, they both looked at the mess in the kitchen and sighed. Kate refused to leave dirty dishes or a messy kitchen overnight. "I'll clean this up right quick if you want to go on upstairs", she offered.
"No way, I'll help and then I'll race you upstairs." Jethro reached for the plates and silverware and put them in the sink.
"That's a deal." Kate began putting away the leftover sauce and cleaning off the table while Jethro loaded the dishwasher. Somehow she managed to sneak off when he wasn't watching and get upstairs a few minutes ahead of him. At least she thought she was sneaking off. Actually, he knew she was ditching him but he didn't care; he figured it would be worthwhile to let her get upstairs first.
Sure enough, he wasn't disappointed. When he walked into the bedroom a few minutes later Kate was coming out of the adjoining bathroom wearing nothing but a smile and his favorite scent.
"I hope you don't mind that I left you to finish the kitchen." Her voice was seducing him from across the room just as surely as her body was.
Jethro swallowed and gave her his best smile, "Not at all." On his was across the bedroom he lost his shirt and his shorts so by the time he got to where she was standing he was just as unclothed as she was.
"Well if I had known during dinner that you were going commando we might not have finished our meal. We might have gone straight to dessert" Kate was grinning from ear to ear as she took in the sight of him standing just a breath away from her.
"For your future reference, commando is the uniform of the day at home. Now, about that dessert." Jethro closed that little bit of space that had been between them and his hands disappeared in Kate's hair as his mouth claimed hers in a kiss that spoke of need and lust and all the passion he could muster.
Kate had just enough presence of mind during the kiss to take four steps forward which brought them to the edge of the bed. When Jethro felt the bed at the back of his legs he merely fell backwards taking Kate with him. When they finally had to break off the kiss Kate scooted herself to the center of the bed and Jethro followed. His hands seemed to be everywhere at once and Kate was lost in the sensation of him touching her, taking and giving pleasure as he explored her already familiar form. She couldn't get enough of him. Her hands roamed over his back and chest, up and down his arms and finally into his hair as she pulled him down to kiss him with her own dose of passion and lust.
As the kiss was ending Kate opened her eyes and looked up at Jethro. She saw something flash across his face but she couldn't quite put a name to it. He just looked at her, then leaned down and gave her a slow, sweet kiss that seemed to take away her ability to think or speak. When he broke off the kiss, Jethro rolled onto his side and began gently touching her with his fingertips. He stroked her face as he gazed into her eyes and when she started to speak he silenced her with a finger to her lips. "No talking, Katie. I want to show you how much I love you. I want you to feel it all over. Will you let me do that?"
Kate kissed his finger and nodded her head trying to tell him with her eyes how much she wanted his touch. It was the sweetest kind of torture to have his hands caressing every inch of her body, lightly grazing her breasts, down her abdomen and just teasing her center. His hands roamed up and down her legs lingering on her inner thighs just a bit too long. When his hands had completed their inventory of her body his mouth took over and repeated the journey. By this time Kate was moaning softly and her hands were reaching for any part of his body she could touch. Jethro continued to worship her with his mouth and his hands until finally he could wait no longer.
Apparently Kate came to the same conclusion at the same time because she grasped his wrist and directed his hand downward letting him discover that she was more than ready for him. Then Kate rolled over on top of him and kissed him fiercely as he entered her. It wasn't long before Kate called his name as she tightened around him and she began to have trouble getting her breath. Jethro was right there with her and when she bit down on his shoulder he let go and joined her in release.
Several minutes later as they lay together all sweaty and tangled in the sheets Jethro said, "I love you Katie. It scares me but I can't help myself, I love you."
"Don't be scared, Jethro. I love you too and I'm not going to leave you."
Jethro propped himself up on one elbow and brushed some hair away from her eyes. He looked at her and hated himself for what he was going to say next. "We both know that's not true. You're leaving next week. I didn't want to talk about this tonight but there it is."
Kate sat up and took his hand in hers. She wondered only briefly how he knew when she was leaving. Then she remembered who she was looking at; Gibbs always knew everything she reminded herself. "I'm just going back to work Jethro. I'm not leaving you specifically. I think you know there's a difference. For the record, it is going to be very difficult for me to leave this time. I don't want to go but I have a job. An important job that I'm very good at and that needs to be done. I know you understand that."
"I do understand. I just don't like it and I don't want you to go. We'll work it out." He held out his hands and Kate went happily into his embrace. She laid her head on his chest where she could feel his heartbeat. One arm rested across his waist and one leg was tangled with his. Jethro held her firmly against himself and kissed her hair. He said softly, "We'll work it out." He reached down and pulled the sheet over them and soon they were both sound asleep.
Sometime after 3 am Kate woke up and found Jethro's space in the bed empty. She laid there for a few minutes trying to decide what to do. Should she go find him and try to talk about it, whatever it was, or should she just leave him alone and let him work it out? She was pretty sure IT was her leaving so she got up and pulled on some shorts and a tee shirt and went in search of her favorite person. She suspected he was in the basement and she was right. Quietly she made her way down the stairs and stood watching him sanding on the boat. He was a very appealing sight, wearing only a pair of old, baggy shorts, his hair all mussed up and a fine layer of sanding dust coating his chest. Few men could pull of that look and have her almost drooling but Jethro sure could.
"Hey, I missed you. Are you okay down here?"
"I'm fine. I didn't want to wake you up by tossing and turning so when I couldn't go back to sleep I decided to get a little work done. She's been neglected the last week or so between work and my new favorite girl."
Kate closed the distance between them and stood behind him, scraping her nails up his back. "I can hardly believe I have replaced your boat in your affections."
Jethro put down his sanding block and turned around to face her, "Believe it." Then he kissed her in a way that left no doubt in her mind where his affections lay.
"Do we need to talk about my leaving?"
"Probably but it doesn't have to be now if you want to wait."
"Well, I'm here and you're here so maybe if we can get it out of the way the rest of weekend will be okay." Kate was worried but she didn't really know why. After all what could happen? 'Better not ask that' she thought to herself.
Jethro framed her face with is hands and kissed her forehead. "Come upstairs with me. Let me take a quick shower and then we can talk."
As they walked upstairs, Kate tried to change his mind. "Jethro, it's 3:30 in the morning. We can wait until later."
"Listen, I have been thinking about this for the past hour and a half. What I have to say won't take very long and then we can go back to bed and the whole thing will be over. You just relax for five minutes and I'll be back."
Kate sat on the couch and fidgeted. She was about as far from relaxed as she could get. Luckily, Jethro was quick in the shower and in just over five minutes he walked into the living room and sat on the low coffee table facing Kate on the couch. He took her hands in his and while his thumbs were caressing the backs of her hands he looked at her and smiled.
"Tell me what you need to tell me Katie."
"I have to leave on Wednesday and I will be gone for a month."
"Okay. I'll be here waiting when you get back."
"What, is that it? Aren't you going to try and talk me out of going? Aren't you going to say it's too dangerous and you don't want me going?" Kate looked at Jethro like he had suddenly grown another head or turned purple. She was shocked and not just a little bit worried that he had finally inhaled too much sawdust and lost his mind. When he just looked at her and smiled she said, "Who are you and where is Jethro Gibbs?"
"I'm him and I'm right here. Listen Katie, you know talking is not my strong suit so bear with me. I have given this a lot of thought especially in the past several hours. Last week my initial reaction would have been to do all those things you just asked about. I would have made it my business to tell you what you could and could not do. Not anymore."
Kate freed one of her hands and laid it on his forehead. "Just checking to see if you have a fever. Continue."
"Very funny. The bottom line is something Ducky reminded me of tonight. It's my turn to stay home and wait for someone, just like Shannon waited for me all the times I was away. Believing as I do, there is no way on earth I could, in good conscience, ask you to stay here when you are needed in your job. I love you Katie, more than I ever imagined I would love anyone again. I will miss you every single day you are gone and I will ask God every day to keep you safe and bring you back to me. I will not ask you to give up what you do because I'm afraid of losing you. I want to, believe me I do. But when I think of all the mothers and father, wives and husbands and children who are waiting for their loved ones to come home I know I can't ask you to stay. I will wait for you."
Kate tried to keep her tears from falling but she couldn't. She opened her arms and Jethro went to her, sitting beside her on the couch and holding her in his arms while she cried. He hated it when she cried but since he had tears of his own to deal with he just held onto her until she stopped. Kate sat up and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. Then she reached up and wiped Jethro's away with her thumb. She kissed him and wrapped her arms around him and held on as tightly as she could. There was so much she wanted to say but she didn't know where to start.
She decided to start with the most important thing. "I love you Jethro Gibbs. I love you with all my heart and soul and can't imagine anything better than being loved by you. Thank you for making it easier for me to go. I know it will be hard on both of us, but you're right, there are thousands of others in the same situation and we will deal with it. I will be careful and I will come home to you."
Jethro flashed back to the last time he had left Shannon and Kelly. He had said almost the same thing to Shannon. And he had come home; but she was gone. Now he had a new appreciation for what Shannon had gone through each time he was deployed. Ducky was right, it was a whole different ballgame now that he was going to be the one waiting at home. He already knew it would be much harder on him to wait than it had been going off to the war.
Jethro ran his hands into her hair and pulled her face up to look at him. "Okay, it's settled. You're going, I'm waiting and that's that. Now, let's go back to bed. The clock is ticking and I don't want to waste anymore time talking."
Very little time that weekend was wasted with talking. Both Jethro and Kate were determined to make the most of what time they had left together. Kate tried to memorize the feel of Jethro's hands on her skin, the scent of sawdust and sound of his voice as he whispered her name. Jethro stored away all the smiles and laughter and the way Kate felt in his arms. For most of the weekend they were never out of each other's sight or range of touch. In the past this much togetherness would have driven Jethro crazy but with Kate he couldn't get enough. They talked about how they would stay connected while she was gone and Jethro promised to really learn how to use his email. By the time Sunday night rolled around they had convinced themselves and each other that everything would be fine.
On Monday Kate had to go into the office for some briefings and to organize schedules and plans with the rest of the team leaving that week. Fortunately Jethro didn't catch a case and they were able to have the evening together. After they finished dinner and were relaxing on the couch Kate realized they would have only one more night together.
She had been snuggled into Jethro's side but now she sat up and looked at him.
"How did you feel when you had to leave Shannon and Kelly and go off to the war?" This was something they had never talked about and Kate was unsure how he would react but she really wanted to gauge how she was feeling as compared to what Jethro had gone through.
Jethro shut his eyes and laid his head back on the cushion. For a long time he didn't say anything but finally he took a deep breath and began to answer. "Every time was the same. I would promise to be careful and come home safely. For days before I would leave we did just about what you and I have been doing. We tried to spend as much time together as possible. I always worried about how she would handle the everyday things like taking care of the house and the car; simple stuff like that. Shannon was very organized and very capable and I really had no reason to worry. But of course I did anyway. I used to worry when Kelly was really little that she would forget who I was if I was gone too long. The thing was, it was normal for me to leave for weeks or months at a time; I was doing that from the very beginning. It was just a way of life for us. I loved being a Marine and I didn't mind the sacrifices I had to make. It got harder the longer we were together and especially after Kelly came along. I don't know if any of that answers your question or helps you."
"It does help me. Jethro, I want you to know that I appreciate how accepting and supportive you are being. I realized today that this whole situation must be causing you a lot of anxiety and bringing up a lot of painful memories."
"I want you to just concentrate on what you're doing, the job you're doing and things will be fine. Don't worry about me. I have dealt with my past for a long time and I will be okay. The memories are not as hard to handle now that I have you so don't you worry about all that. Why don't you let me do the worrying in this relationship; I'm very good at it you know."
"Well, you know I do worry about you. The people you deal with every day can be dangerous and I worry."
"You mean DiNozzo and McGee? They're only dangerous to each other."
"Very funny. You know what I mean. How many times have you been shot at in the past month?"
"What difference does it make as long as I didn't get hit?"
"Again, very funny. You know what I'm talking about. I do worry about you every day when you go to work. I know you will worry about me; I just wanted to make sure you understand it goes both ways."
"I understand. Now you have used up your daily time allotted for talking. Let's do something else." Before she could ask what he had in mind, Jethro began kissing her and undressing her and then there was no need to ask.
Eventually the couch proved too small and uncomfortable for further activity so they moved to the bedroom. Kate had been right about Jethro dealing with painful memories of his partings from Shannon. He had realized over the weekend that he and Kate were virtually duplicating what he and Shannon had done that last weekend before he left for Desert Storm; and in the same room as a matter of fact. That realization had weighed on him during he weekend but he thought he had hidden it from Kate. Obviously, based on her earlier comment, he wasn't as good at hiding things from her as he thought he was. Whatever all that meant and what he was supposed to do about it eluded Jethro. He decided he would have plenty of time to sort all that out in the next month. For right now, he had other things he wanted to concentrate on; for instance, the beautiful brunette that was currently unbuttoning his shirt.
Their lovemaking that night was slow and sensual and filled with the desire to please each other. They fell asleep wrapped in each other arms. When Jethro woke up about 3:30 he found Kate had rolled off of him and was asleep on her back. He couldn't resist touching her. He began lightly running a hand up and down her arm and when she didn't move he progressed to her stomach and then her hip. Kate began to stir as he leaned down and placed a series of kisses from her abdomen to her breasts. He couldn't help himself and when he began kissing the corners of her mouth he slid over on top of her. Kate's hands immediately reached up to run through his hair and she wrapped her legs around him pulling him even closer.
With her eyes still closed she mumbled sleepily, "Is it time to get up already?"
"No, but I couldn't sleep and I couldn't keep my hands off of you."
"Well then let's get busy." With that Kate slid her feet down his legs and rolled them over. This time there would be no slow, sensual dance. This time was hot and busy and a lot more like wrestling than dancing. By the time Kate collapsed on his chest, Jethro was beyond rational thought but he knew he had never had sex quite that satisfying or exhausting before. He sincerely doubted he would wake up again without his alarm sounding. Kate fell asleep on his chest and he wrapped his arms around her and drifted off to the feeling of her breath puffing out on his skin.
On Tuesday Kate spent the day packing and making sure all her documents, cameras and film were ready. She had been through this routine seven times in the past year so it was not difficult to get everything organized. She met with the team one more time for lunch and then she was off until they met to fly out early Wednesday morning. After lunch she went to an electronics store to get some things for Jethro.
Jethro made sure he wasn't going to be tied up on Tuesday afternoon so when 3:00 rolled around he told Tony he was in charge and left for the day. He knew Kate was going to be off this afternoon and would probably be at his house. When he got home he found her in the living room knee deep in boxes and packing material.
Leaning down he kissed her and said, "Hey beautiful. What's all this?"
Kate got up from the floor and sat next to him on the couch. She put a new laptop on the coffee table and handed Jethro a new phone. "Some going away presents from me to you. Maybe I should say staying behind presents. Anyway, the phone is just for calls from me. It's all set up with my cell number and your voice mail is set up too. This way I can call you when I have some time and even if you can't answer I can leave you a message. I won't bug you but I wanted you to have this so I won't tie up your work phone. And you can call me too."
"Thank you." Jethro gave her a long, deep kiss that had serious need attached to it.
"You're welcome. Let's get on with this before I have to have another kiss like that one." Kate then showed Jethro the new laptop. He cringed, she laughed and then she began her instructions and demonstration. It would have taken about fifteen minutes if he was paying attention but he kept rubbing her back, playing with her hair and kissing the side of her neck.
"Jethro, pay attention. I want you to know how to use this thing while I'm gone so we can communicate."
"Katie, believe it or not, I do know how to use email. I know how to use a computer. Here I'll demonstrate so we can move on." Jethro proceeded to log onto the email account she had set up for him and send a message to Abby in her lab. While they were waiting for Abby to respond Jethro managed to steal several more kisses. Abby emailed back and he said proudly, "See I can email."
"That's wonderful. Can you instant message? Do you know what instant messaging is?"
"Is this something Abby can show me when you're gone?" Jethro had his hand up the back of her shirt and was deftly unhooking her bra as he asked that question.
"Yes." Kate laughed because she knew her tutorial on the computer was over. Abby would have the pleasure of teaching Jethro to IM. This was actually a very good deal for Kate because now she could spend the rest of the day enjoying skills Jethro had already mastered.
As Tuesday afternoon turned to evening and then to night there was finally nothing more to say. They had spent most of their last day together in bed, loving one another and trying to make time slow down. They shared a quiet supper together and conversation was at a minimum. Around 11:00 they headed upstairs to bed for what would be the last time for at least a month. Kate was doing her best not to be emotional but it was getting harder and harder as the hours ticked by. She knew she had said everything she wanted and needed to say and now all she wanted to do was lie in Jethro's arms and feel his love surrounding her.
Jethro was struggling to keep up the positive and supportive front he had been practicing for the past several days. What he really wanted to do was take Kate and run away someplace where no one could find them. He hated the fact that she was leaving, he was scared for her to be going back into harms way and he knew he wouldn't feel right again until she came home. He was determined however to keep all that to himself and continue to do whatever he could to make it easier for Kate to go do her job. That is exactly what he knew Shannon had done for him so many times. He was hoping he could do it as well as she had done all those years ago.
As they lay wrapped in each others arms, Jethro quietly said, "If you see that soldier again, the one who asked for the drawings from the Tomb of the Unknown, I want you to tell him thank you for me. Tell him he helped save my life."
"I'm going to try and find him. I'm taking my drawings with me so I can give them to him. Don't worry, I'll tell him. He helped save us both, Jethro but you have done an awful lot to make it work for us. I love you." Finally Kate could not hold back her tears any longer. "Oh god, I don't want to leave you. What if something happens to you and I can't be here. I just found you again and I don't want to lose you. Please promise me you will be careful and nothing will happen to you." She clung to Jethro and cried the tears she had been storing up for the past two days.
Jethro smoothed her hair and rubbed her back until she could stop crying. "I'm sorry, I guess I just couldn't hold those in any longer."
"Don't apologize. If you need to cry just do it. I understand. You know I can't promise nothing will happen but I will be careful. I'll make DiNozzo go first into every room how's that?"
Kate laughed a small laugh. "I know better than that. Just remember, I'll be really mad if you get hurt and I don't get to be here to take care of you."
"I'll remember. You are the one who needs to promise to be careful. I know you want that one perfect picture but I want you home in a month, safe and sound so don't take any stupid chances. And Kate, don't try and hide stuff from me. I know you see some bad stuff and I want you to talk about it, if not with me then with someone. Promise me."
"I will. We do that for each other on the team and it's been good so far. I'll be okay."
They laid awake for a long time after that just holding one another, touching and kissing and whispering to each other. When the alarm went off at 5:30 Jethro didn't think he had been asleep for more than an hour or two at the most. He kissed Kate awake and they made love one more time before they had to get ready and leave. Sharing the shower saved a little time and extended the togetherness just a little bit longer. Inevitably though 7:00 rolled around and as they were about to leave the house Jethro's phone rang.
"Sorry Boss, we've got a dead sailor. Fornell called and said he's got something on it too."
"Alright, I'll be there in twenty minutes. Tell Fornell to wait for me."
Kate looked at him and smiled. "You need to go. I have to meet my group at the office and then we're going to the airport. It's better that we say our goodbyes here anyway."
Jethro pulled her into a fierce hug and kissed her hard, his hands tangled in her hair holding her tightly against him. "Dammit! I love you and will be right here when you come home. You mean everything to me Katie, remember that and come home safely."
"I love you, Jethro. I will be back in a month. You get busy with Abby and learn to IM so we can talk, okay. I'll call you later, before we leave. Please take care of yourself. Give my love to Ducky." Kate wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him quickly goodbye, fearing that if she took too much more time she wouldn't be able to go. Then she got in her car, blew him a kiss and was gone.
Jethro stood in the driveway until her car was out of sight but he knew he was needed at the office so he finally got in his own car and went to work. His stomach was already in a knot and he hoped this case they had been handed was going to be complicated and require all his attention for several days. He figured that was the only way he would survive the first few days of Kate being gone.
The case was complicated with multiple victims and even more suspects. The FBI's entanglement led to other issues and he and Fornell had multiple 'conferences' over the next week. Jethro didn't even go home for the rest of the week so missing Kate at home at least, was not an issue. She called before she left that afternoon and again when they landed. The conversations were short of course but at least he got to hear her voice. When he finally went home on Saturday morning he was too tired to do anything but shower and fall into bed where he slept for the next ten hours.
On Sunday, Abby showed up at his house with pizza and taught him the ins and outs of instant messaging. They actually managed to get Kate online and Abby disappeared into the kitchen for a while so they could "talk privately". It wasn't perfect but it was sure better than nothing. Abby and Kate talked about setting up a video call for the next Sunday and Abby said she would help Jethro with that too. The feed was cut off soon after that and Abby went home.
Jethro was home alone for the first time in a week. For someone who has spent so much of his life alone that shouldn't have been a problem but now it was. Determined not too sit around and worry, Jethro got busy on the boat and as usual that was just what he needed. As he settled into the routine of sanding the boat his anxiety was quieted and he let the rhythm of the work occupy his mind. He consoled himself with the knowledge that the first few days were probably the worst and those were behind him. In just twenty six days, Kate would be home.
Jethro and his team stayed busy for the next few weeks and the time passed fairly quickly for him. He managed to get quite a bit of work done on the boat and drank only one bottle of bourbon in the process. Kate emailed regularly and called when she could. Jethro was becoming very adept at instant messaging and it was almost like talking to Kate in person. Unfortunately, the date for Kate's return kept getting pushed back every few days until she had been gone for six weeks instead of four. She assured him this was not out of the ordinary and she was fine if a bit anxious to get home.
Finally, on day forty-four, while Jethro was up to his neck in a drug case, Kate arrived home. She had stopped giving him arrival dates a week prior because they just kept changing. This meant he had no idea she was coming home and certainly no idea she was about to make an appearance at the Navy Yard. Knowing how much he prized his privacy Kate decided to go straight to autopsy and have Ducky call him down there so she could surprise him. She didn't think he would be quite as happy to see her if she showed up in the squad room. When she got off the elevator and walked into autopsy Ducky was alone, just as she had hoped.
When the automatic doors whooshed open Ducky looked up to see who was coming. "Oh my goodness, Caitlyn. You are a sight for sore eyes. Welcome home. What are you doing down here though?"
Kate gave Ducky a hug and said, "I wanted to surprise Jethro but not in front of the whole team. I was hoping you could call him down here for me."
"Of course. Good decision by the way. Does he even know you are back in the States?"
"No, travel was so iffy that I just stopped saying when I was coming. Is he in the middle of a case?"
"Yes, they are but it's been going on for a few days now. He could undoubtedly use a night off. Let me call him."
Ducky put his phone on speaker and grinned at Kate. "Jethro, could you come down here please. Just you. I have something I need to discuss with you."
"Kinda busy here Duck. Can it wait?"
"I'm afraid not. Won't take a minute but I do need to see you."
"On my way."
Kate was almost to jump out of her skin with anticipation. "Thank you Ducky."
"You're welcome my dear. Now I do believe Abby needs me in her lab. Take Jethro home and don't take no for an answer." Ducky kissed her and quickly left to go hide out in Abby's lab and give her the good news that Kate was home.
Kate was nervously pacing in front of the elevator when it finally arrived and the doors slid open. Jethro didn't get two steps out of the car before he was practically tackled by a very enthusiastic brunette. He instinctively wrapped his arms around her as she plastered herself to him and they stumbled back into the elevator car.
"Damn Kate, when did you get here? What are you doing down here? Never mind that." Without waiting for the answers to his questions he kissed her and kept on kissing her as the doors of the elevator kept closing and opening, waiting for direction from the occupants.
When Jethro took a moment to catch his breath Kate took over the control of the kissing and backed him into the corner of their little cube. "Ducky says you need to go home and I'm here to get you and take you there. Any objections?"
"None." Jethro pushed the button for the squad room floor and the doors finally closed. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her once more. "When did you get back?"
Kate looked at her watch and said, "About forty-five minutes ago. I took a cab here instead of going home. I wanted to surprise you and since I didn't know when you might get home I figured this was the place to find you. Is that okay?"
"Absolutely."
The elevator arrived and they stepped off. Jethro went to his desk and announced to the team they could go home for the night and report back at 0900 tomorrow. Tony looked up and saw Kate and understood why the Boss was suddenly smiling and sending them home.
"Oh, Kate, thank you for coming home. You have no idea how happy I am that you are back." He braced himself for the expected head slap but none was forthcoming.
As Jethro walked past his desk Tony was sure he heard him say, "You and me both, DiNozzo."
Kate was home for three weeks this time. Those twenty-one days were mixture of work, stolen afternoons at home and long nights spent catching up on sleep and sex. Apparently neither one of them slept well alone anymore so weekends were spent mostly in the bedroom. Jethro and his team finished the drug case and fortunately nothing overwhelming came in during the time Kate was at home. She went into work every day but often managed to get away by 3:00 and Jethro made every effort to be home by 6:00. They enjoyed quiet dinners together followed by lots of time on the couch talking about what Kate had witnessed in Iraq. Jethro encouraged her to talk about all of it and then he held her until she fell asleep in his arms.
As the days of her being home began to dwindle they tried to spend as much time together as possible. Again, just like the first time she prepared to leave him, Kate tried to memorize his touch and his scent and the sound of his voice. There was never enough time to get all of him that she wanted. Never enough hours in the night to love him as much as she wanted to or to lie securely in his embrace. Kate silently wondered how many times she would be able to come home and then leave again. It seemed harder this time than last or maybe it was just her imagination. Sometimes Jethro seemed too quiet and she wondered if he was asking himself the same questions she was asking.
Jethro continued to struggle with the idea and the reality of Kate going back to the war. He was proud of her for her courage and her determination to do her job but at the same time he wondered how their relationship would fair if this went on very much longer. He decided not to think about that right now. The days they had left were few and he didn't want to spoil their time together by worrying. Instead he spent his time with Kate soaking up all the things he loved about her. He hadn't been in the basement for any length of time since she came home. He found his comfort these days in holding her, running his hands through her hair as he kissed her and of course making love to her every chance he got. Sometimes all he wanted to do was let his hands and his mouth caress her and watch her as she came alive with desire. When they were together Jethro thought of nothing else. The world outside his house could have floated away and he wouldn't have known or cared. He felt himself being taken over by his need for this beautiful, sensuous woman and that was more than a little bit worrisome in his mind. The thing was, his mind had very little to do with anything for those twenty-one days.
All too soon their three week reprieve was over and they were once again saying goodbye in the driveway. As they hugged and kissed one last time Jethro made a decision.
"When you get back I want you to move in with me for real."
"Are you sure Jethro? That is a pretty serious move. Maybe we should talk about it."
"How much time did you spend at your apartment these last three weeks?"
"About twenty minutes."
"Then why keep paying rent? Unless you don't want to be here." He left it at that; the implication dangling in the air between them.
"That's not it at all. I'm just surprised you didn't bring it up until now. It's a level of commitment we haven't talked about, that's all." Kate was desperate not to let this become an issue especially when she was practically on her way to the airport.
Jethro just shrugged and smiled at her. "We can talk about it when you come back. No big deal." He leaned down and gave her a slow, deep kiss that let her gasping for air. "I still love you Katie. Take care of yourself and keep your head down."
"I love you babe. You do the same and I'll see you in a few weeks. I'll call you before we take off."
This time Kate was scheduled to be gone for almost two months. On day fifty-three—he knew what day it was because he was counting them—the thing that Kate feared finally came to pass. Jethro and Tony had gone to question a suspect in the abduction and rape of a Petty Officer. As they arrived and prepared to get out of the car Jethro warned Tony to be careful because the information they had suggested the guy was pretty volatile. That would prove to be the understatement of the week. Jethro had just stepped out of the car and closed the door, unknowingly losing the only cover he had, when the suspect opened fire on them from the house. Before he could move or even think about moving, Jethro was hit in the shoulder and the thigh and was on the ground completely exposed to the gunman. Tony was protected by the position of the car and immediately began returning fire.
"Boss, you alright?" He didn't hear any gunfire from the other side of the car and knew Gibbs had been hit.
"I'm not dead if that's what you mean."
"Can you move at all?" Tony continued to fire at the house and reached for his cell phone at the same time calling frantically for backup and medical help.
"Not sure yet." Gibbs was able to roll over onto the uninjured shoulder and crawl toward the back of the car. He made it as far as the back tire before he had to stop. He was losing a lot of blood and that was making it very difficult to stay conscious and keep moving at the same time.
"I'm coming over there. Can you fire at all."
"Yeah, come on." Gibbs began covering fire so Tony could move to his side of the car.
Tony sprinted around the back of the car firing while he grabbed Gibbs by the collar of his jacket and dragged him to cover. He pulled off his shirt wrapping it around Gibbs' leg tightly then used his jacket to press against the shoulder wound. It seemed to Tony there was an awful lot of blood everywhere. Gibbs was having a hard time sitting up so Tony carefully laid him down.
"Hang on Boss, help is on the way. I guess you were right, the guy is kinda volatile."
"Ya think, DiNozzo?" Gibbs felt like he was floating and he knew he wouldn't be awake much longer. He wondered why ambulances always seemed to take so long when he was the one bleeding.
The gunfire had stopped and Tony kept an eye on the house in case the suspect decided to come out. Sirens were blaring in the background and finally the paramedics and local police showed up followed moments later by the backup team from NCIS. Tony apprised them of the situation and they deployed their men around the house but no more shots came from the residence. Tony turned his attention from the house back to Gibbs who was being loaded onto a gurney for the trip to Bethesda.
Gibbs motioned for Tony to come to him. He grasped Tony's arm and pulled him down to speak to him. "DiNozzo, you make sure Abby doesn't call Kate. I don't want her to hear about this until I can talk to her. Understand? No one is to call her or email her. Make sure of it."
"I gotcha Boss. No news to Kate. I'll make sure. I'll call Ducky and we'll see you at the hospital."
Fortunately the wounds were not life threatening; very painful and to Jethro, an annoyance, but nothing from which he would not recover. Ducky arrived at the hospital as they were taking Jethro to surgery to deal with both wounds. He assured his friend no one had been in contact with Kate. It was almost two hours later when the surgeon came out to give Ducky and the rest of the team a report.
"Agent Gibbs is in the recovery room and will be moved to a private room in about an hour or so. The shoulder wound was through and through, very little damage fortunately. We cleaned it and sewed him up. The thigh was not so clean but again, he was lucky. The bullet missed the bone and the major blood vessels so he'll be fine there too. Obviously your bad guy was a lousy shot which is very good news for Agent Gibbs. Someone will come let you know when he's settled in his room."
Ducky spoke for the team, "Thank you Dr. Evans. We appreciate you giving us all this information. How long do you suspect he will be here? I only ask because he is a notoriously, shall we say, reluctant patient and he will be asking to go home fairly soon after he wakes up."
Dr. Evans laughed and said, "Yes, I have been warned. One of the surgical nurses knows Agent Gibbs from a previous stay here. I would say a couple of days should do it depending of course on how things go. I'll be back to check on him in a couple of hours."
As doctor Evans walked away, Ducky suggested they all go get something to eat while they waited for Jethro to be moved to his room. As they started for the elevator Ducky's phone beeped. "Go ahead and I will catch up with you" he told the others and they got on the elevator as he opened his phone.
"Dr. Mallard." He answered not recognizing the number.
"Ducky, it's Kate. Is Jethro alright?"
"Caitlyn my dear, what in the world are you doing calling at this hour? Isn't it midnight there?" Ducky was stalling, trying to decide what he was going to tell her.
"Ducky, I know something has happened. A friend from the DOD sent me a text that an NCIS agent was shot and Jethro hasn't answered his phone in hours. Please tell me he's alright."
Ducky knew he couldn't deny her the information now. Obviously she feared the worst and he had to set her mind at ease; even if Jethro had made everyone promise not to tell her. Someone had beaten them to the punch. "Caitlyn, he's fine. Yes, he was shot but he will be fine in no time. He has one gunshot to the thigh and a through and through in the left shoulder. He is still in the recovery room but I assure he will be fine."
"Thank you Ducky. I'm sure he told you not to call me. He forgets I have other sources of information. Unfortunately my friend didn't have details and I have been going crazy trying to call Jethro. Give him my love and tell him I'll be home in five days. At least that's the plan. Gotta go Ducky, the phone is beeping at me. Thanks again. Bye."
As expected Jethro was his usual hard-to-get-along-with self for the next two days he was in the hospital. Kate had called him both days trying to cheer him up but it didn't help much. In fact for some reason it seemed to have the opposite effect, something he couldn't or wouldn't explain when Ducky asked him about it.
"Jethro, what is going on with you? I should think you would welcome Kate's interest and concern for you. Yet, you don't seem very happy when she calls. Are you having problems?"
"It's nothing. I just want to go home. You know I hate hospitals." He avoided looking at his friend, choosing instead to count ceiling tiles. Ducky knew him too well and Jethro wasn't ready to have this conversation just yet. It would have to happen sooner or later but not here and not yet.
"Well you will be home tomorrow morning according to Dr. Evans. When is Kate supposed to be back?"
"Friday or Saturday if the schedule holds up."
Since it was almost 8:00 pm Ducky bid Jethro goodnight and told him he would be back to get him first thing in the morning to take him home. He decided to wait until then to inquire again about his friend's mood. Some of it was definitely due to Jethro's stay in the hospital but that didn't account for all of his surly and somewhat uncooperative manner. Ducky was beginning to see the "old Jethro" rearing his ugly head and he was not going to let that go unchallenged.
As it turned out it was not Ducky who picked Jethro up a the hospital after all. A multiple homicide case was keeping Ducky busy in autopsy so Tony and McGee rescued their boss from the clutches of the medical establishment. Gibbs insisted on going to the office and of course since he was the Boss, that is exactly where they went. With his left arm in sling and his right leg heavily bandaged Gibbs could barely hobble but at least he was in the squad room and at his desk instead of in the hospital or lying on the couch at home. There was plenty of paperwork to catch up with and everyone felt better having him there even if he was growling at them.
By the time Kate got back three days later, Jethro was walking with barely a limp and his arm was out of the sling. Kate showed up at his house on Saturday afternoon having called from the airport to let him know she was coming. They had talked quite often while she was gone this time so there was no catching up of that sort to be done. There was quite a bit of the other kind of catching up to do however and that got underway as soon as the door closed behind Kate. Jethro swept her into his arms and kissed her soundly. She responded in kind and before long clothes were being deposited on the floor as they slowly made their way upstairs to the bedroom.
"By the way, welcome home Katie. I've missed you." Jethro finally spoke as he pulled Kate down on the bed with him and finished undressing her.
"I missed you too. How's the shoulder and your leg?"
"They're fine but you can kiss them if you think it might help."
"I think I might just do that. But first let me look at your handsome face." Kate gently stroked her fingers down his face and pulled him down to kiss her. "Do you know how much I miss touching you and looking at you, Jethro? I lie awake at night thinking about you, aching to feel your hands on me. Trying to remember the sensation of your hands on my skin." The emotion in her voice gave him chills.
He didn't trust himself to speak so Jethro began kissing her and touching her and tasting her until finally that wasn't enough. Kate rolled them over and returned the favor before she took him in hand and helped him enter her. Falling over the edge with him was just about the best thing Kate could imagine doing. No matter how many times they made love, the last time was always the best time. When she collapsed on his chest Kate had to ask herself why she continued to leave this man for weeks at a time. Holding onto her as they settled their breathing and their heart rates Jethro was asking himself how much longer he could accept her being gone for weeks at a time.
During that first weekend, Kate and Jethro both felt like something was just a little bit off between them. Unfortunately, they had not spent enough time together during the last few months to be able to figure out what was going on with the other person. Even though they had been back in a relationship for just over five months they had only spent five weeks of that time together. The time they had together was always like a vacation; not like everyday life. Now they were entering their second two week window of time between her trips and something was definitely "hinky" as Abby would say. They still wanted to be together, they still enjoyed each others company and the sex was still wonderful but…
On Monday when they went back to work, Jethro and his team got called in on a case involving an attack on a female Marine and her child was discovered missing. The crime scene took most of the day to process and they came away with almost nothing to help them find the child. The mother was in critical condition and in a coma so she couldn't tell them anything. Jethro called Kate about 6:00 that evening and told her he didn't know when or if he would be home. She said she understood and she would probably stay at her apartment that night. She told him to call if he did go home and she would come over. He sent his team home at midnight and at 3:00 am he finally decided to go home. He didn't call Kate; it was too late or early depending on your point of view, and he just wanted to collapse in bed for a couple of hours. He was back in the office by 7:00 am but the day produced no solid leads and the mother was still unconscious.
Wednesday afternoon the mother finally woke up but she was very fuzzy and couldn't tell them anything helpful. The doctors said maybe tomorrow. Gibbs was afraid time would run out for the child if they didn't get some useful information pretty soon. They finally got the break they needed when an alert store clerk in North Carolina recognized the child from a missing persons report. The FBI was called in and they managed to apprehend the child's uncle and rescue the little boy without incident late Wednesday night. The uncle had taken the boy intending to return him to the father in Florida. Gibbs was happy to go to the hospital and tell the mother her son was safe and on the way home to her.
By the time he got home it was after midnight. Kate was apparently at her apartment because she wasn't at his house. He couldn't remember what they had talked about regarding where she was staying but he was sure he thought she would be "at home". Was he supposed to call her? Why was she staying at the apartment when she had never done that before when he was working? That little thing that was nagging at him seemed to grow bigger but it still wasn't big enough for him to identify. He wanted her there with him but it pissed him off just a little bit that he had to call and tell her he was home. So, he asked himself, 'do you want to sleep alone or with Kate?' The answer to that was simple so he called her. After all that, she didn't answer. He left a message saying he was at home and went to take a very long, very hot shower.
When he got out of the shower and walked back into the bedroom Kate was snuggled up in his bed fast asleep. She must have been on her way over when he called her he thought. Jethro smiled down at the sleeping Kate and he wasn't even the least bit pissed off anymore. He turned off the light and slipped into bed behind her, spooning her and wrapping his arm around her midsection. Kate murmured and seemed to melt into him pulling his arm even tighter around herself; suddenly all was right in the world of Jethro Gibbs.
They both went into work on Friday morning feeling better after finally having a night together. Plans were made to go out for dinner that night; depending of course on whether or not the team caught a case. Luckily no one; at least no Navy or Marine personnel, were murdered or robbed or kidnapped on Friday and Jethro was actually home at 6:00. They had a very nice dinner out and then an even nicer evening at home. When they arrived back at the house Jethro helped Kate out of her dress and she in turn helped him out of his jacket and shirt. By the time he was stepping out of his shoes and trousers, Kate was already on the bed smiling at him and asking him what was taking him so long.
"I've been busy kissing you remember."
"Oh yeah, I do remember that. Do you think, if you ever get those pants off, that you could do that kissing thing again." She was laughing at him and he was loving every second of it.
"I think we can do that and a whole lot more as a matter of fact." The instant that statement was out of his mouth he tackled Kate and began to show her exactly what he meant by a "whole lot more".
Lying together, enjoying the feel of each other, Kate and Jethro were each lost in their own thoughts. They were both wondering how much longer they could continue with this routine that had taken over their lives. She wanted to talk to him about her fears and he wanted to talk to her about his but neither one of them wanted or knew how to begin.
Kate had convinced herself that Jethro was happy with the arrangement they had and probably didn't want to change it. He had not mentioned her moving in again. He seemed to do fine when she was gone and he was always happy to have her home. In her mind, it was the perfect situation for Jethro because he got to have his alone time and still had her for a couple of weeks of togetherness and sex. It wasn't that she thought he was using her, it was just that she remembered how much he liked to be alone in the basement with his boat and she figured he still felt that way. The problem was that she was quickly becoming less and less interested in being gone for weeks and months at a time. She wanted to be home with Jethro; she wanted to have a normal life, dealing with everyday ups and downs. She wanted a family. They had not talked about that, in fact they rarely talked about anything much past "how was your day?" and "what do you want to eat?" Conversation was not high on their list of priorities when their time together was so limited. That was going to have to change she decided. And pretty damn soon.
Kate was lying beside him, lazily tracing her fingers up and down his chest while he caressed her back tenderly. Jethro knew he didn't want their relationship to continue in what he thought of as vacation mode. He was pretty sure that Kate was satisfied with their status but he wasn't. It had hurt and surprised him when she balked at moving in with him. She seemed to be okay with being gone so much and the time she was home they were always together as much as possible which seemed to suit her as well. He didn't think she had any idea that he was very much ready for a change. He found it more and more difficult to be positive and supportive when she left. While she was gone he found himself spending too much time in the basement drinking too much bourbon until he knew she was on the way home. Jethro could almost feel the walls going back up and the defenses going back into place. Too much time alone was driving him back to that comfort zone of solitary living that he thought he was leaving behind when he got Kate back in his life. He knew they needed to talk about where they were going and whether or not they were going there together. The same old fear of being left again wasn't just creeping up on him anymore; it was walking boldly in the front door. Something had to change and pretty damn soon as far as he was concerned.
"Jethro?" Kate's voice was sleepy and quiet.
"Uh-huh."
"I love you. You know that right?"
"Yeah, I know. I love you too. Are you okay?"
Kate raised her head and searched his face to see if she could tell what he was thinking. "I'm fine. I just wanted to say that. Sometimes I think I don't say it enough anymore and I don't want you to forget it."
"You can never say it too much but I haven't forgotten. And don't you forget Katie, that I love you every single day."
"I won't." Moments later she was asleep.
Jethro laid there holding her and hoping he would be able to find the words to tell her what he wanted and needed to make her understand. That was going to be Saturday's project.
Saturday was cool and rainy; the perfect day to stay snuggled up inside with your favorite person. That wasn't exactly what Kate and Jethro were doing. He was in the basement giving some long needed attention to his boat. Kate, having finished all her laundry, was curled up on the couch reading. Unbeknownst to each other they had both decided that today was going to be the day they cleared the air and let the other person know what they were feeling. Judging by the fact that they were not only in separate rooms but on separate floors of the house it didn't seem like they were anywhere near having those conversations.
Downstairs, Jethro put down the sanding block and slumped down onto the stool at the workbench. He brushed the sanding dust off his shirt and arms and told himself he needed to go upstairs and talk to Kate. He didn't have the first idea how to start the conversation though which was why he had been down here in the basement for the past two hours. He thought back to all he had told her the first time she left. He was feeling a little hypocritical now because he wanted her to stay home. Somehow he knew that if they continued in this coming and going pattern their relationship would not survive. It was just too new to be able to withstand this much time apart. He also knew her contract at the DOD was up for renewal; the perfect time for her to make a change without shirking her responsibilities.
In the living room Kate sighed and put her book down. She had just read the same page three times and knew she might as well give up. All she could really concentrate on was her need to talk to Jethro. What she was going to say to him was as much as mystery to her as what was on the page she kept rereading. Her true worry though was how he was going to react when she finally got out what she needed him to know. Kate was very much afraid she was about to ruin what could be a wonderful relationship.
In a good illustration of the "great minds think alike" saying, Jethro was halfway up the stairs when Kate started down them.
"Hi, I was just coming up to see you."
Kate laughed a nervous little laugh. "And I was on my down to talk to you. Shall we go up or down?"
"Let's go up. I need to wash off a little and get some coffee. Do you want anything?"
"No thanks."
Kate followed him into the kitchen and watched as he washed his hands and face at the sink. She sat down at the table and immediately began playing with the placemat. Jethro poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down across from her. He took note of her busy hands and her pinched facial expression and knew something was going on in that pretty head. He had interrogated enough suspects and interviewed enough witnesses to recognize a case of nerves when he saw one. Of course Kate knew that too so she was afraid to look at him knowing he would be able to read her eyes and her expression.
When he could stand it no longer Jethro reached across to still her hands. "What is it Katie? Is something wrong?"
Kate felt his warm hands on hers and she wanted so badly to just say forget it and go on the way things were but she knew she couldn't. She had to get this out and then deal with the consequences.
"I don't know if wrong is the term I'd use but I do think we need to talk. We don't do much of that and I am feeling like maybe we are slipping away from each other."
"Okay, why don't you start and I'll jump in as needed. Whatever it is we can work it out. I love you Kate and we can work out whatever is bothering you."
Kate knew he was a "bottom line" kind of person so she decided to just cut to the chase. "I think we need to make some changes. I don't like being away so much and I need to do something different professionally to fix that. I know you're okay with the way things are now but I'm not. I want to be here with you and have a normal life with all the regular up and downs. It seems like we are always on a vacation or honeymoon or something when I'm home and that's not realistic. If we are going to make a relationship work in the long run we need more time together. I know I said we needed to think about it but I want to move in with you, that is if you still want me to. Believe me I understand if that's not what you want but it's what I want and what I need."
Kate had kept her gaze steady on his face while she spoke but his expression remained unreadable. 'Damn he's good' she thought. No trace of what he was thinking was evident in his eyes or on his face. What she couldn't see were the little flip flops his heart was doing and the speed at which his thoughts were racing around in his head. She couldn't tell that relief was rushing through his system at the speed of sound. Kate did feel his grip on her hands tighten just a little but she didn't know what that meant.
After what seemed like an eternity Jethro smiled at her and said, "You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say all that." At that Kate's mouth fell open and her eyes filled with tears. Before she could say anything though he forged ahead. "I was coming up to tell you that I don't think I can go on much longer with you being gone so much. I know I've said it's okay but it's really not. I'm miserable the whole time you're gone. We never seem to take time to really talk to each other or just be together. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining about what we've been doing all this time. That's been great but believe it or not, Katie, I want more for us. I also want us to have a real life together. One of the main reasons I wanted us back together is I don't want to spend my nights alone in the basement anymore. I want to spend my nights with you. And my afternoons and my weekends and all my mornings too. I miss you so much when you're gone and I don't want you to go away anymore."
From his first sentence Kate knew everything was going to be alright with them. She had been so sure that he was happy with her being gone that she almost couldn't believe what she was hearing. The question in her mind about whether or not to renew her contract for her job was answered long before Jethro stopped talking.
"Oh Jethro you have no idea how much I needed to hear you say all that. I was thinking you were fine with me being gone and I didn't know how to tell you I don't want to do it anymore. I was stupidly afraid you wanted your time alone. The time we are apart is killing me and I want to be here with you more than anything in the world. I do love my job but I can't keep leaving you for months at a time. When my contract ends next month I'm not going back."
The smile on his face was enough to light up even the gloomy weather outside. Jethro stood up and Kate met him in the middle of the kitchen. She went happily into his arms and wrapped herself around him, letting him enfold her in a tight embrace. He kissed the top of her head and they stood there holding each other for a long time. It seemed such a long time ago that Kate was wondering how in the world she was going to tell Jethro she was leaving in five days. Now she wouldn't have to tell him that ever again and that realization filled her with a sense of relief and happiness that rivaled anything she'd felt before. She was staying home; home with the man she loved and planned to spend her life with.
There was just one more thing she needed to tell him but that could wait; for a little while anyway. As he kept telling her, they would work it out.
END