Title: Damned, but Damn You too
By: Sychron
Setting: AU, Modern day. College Fic.
Pairings: Excruciatingly slow SasuNejSasu. Maybe others, mostly M/M.
Summary: When the ability to see the dead jeopardizes his sanity, only one person could help.
"Your medical files report severe hallucinations."
Silence answered him.
"Can you tell me anything about them?"
"Yes, I can," replied Sasuke Uchiha. He watched the phantoms flit over the office walls. Sometimes, they would pause, as if staring back at him.
The doctor, supposedly a specialist from Kumokagure, looked at him, and his bulbous lips curled piggishly into the man's definition of a smile. Yanamato righted his pen, ready to take notes. Sasuke regarded the forty-something, balding psychiatrist with disinterested eyes. His arms weren't crossed, because crossed arms signified defensiveness, and he sprawled back into the chair with a forced carelessness.
"Not that I'm going to," said the Uchiha heir.
"You may think no one will understand," said Yanamato. "But I can understand you."
"I see," said Sasuke.
Yanamato's incredible lack of patience was astonishing for someone of his profession, Sasuke thought.
"Listen Sasuke," said Yanamato. He tried to convey excitement. "Talking gets stuff off your chest. I'm here to listen. I'm here with professional opinions that can change your life. I'm here to help."
Sasuke paused, as if considering, "That's directly quoted from the sixth edition of the Psychiatry: A General Manual by Hugosen, isn't it?"
Not taking the hint, Yanamato continued to treat Sasuke as a child. "If you say it out loud, I'm sure those monsters will leave you alone."
"You speak as if I am bothered by those monsters." Sasuke added 'those' with a small jerk of his head, as if the monsters in question existed. The doctor fell for the trap.
"So you see monsters?" Yanamato asked, mockery barely concealed behind false concern.
"T-bone steak knife," said Sasuke. "How do you think it feels like to stab yourself to death with one?"
Yanamato raised an eyebrow. "What."
"There was a man, a doctor, who was cheating on his wife with a patient. His wife told him she will kill herself if he doesn't stop," said Sasuke. His voice was bland; he could have been reciting a memorized manuscript with that tone. "But he didn't stop, did he? He continued cheating, and one night, he went home to his wife's dead body."
Yanamato stood up, eyes blazing. "Enough!"
Sasuke continued, allowing anger and resentment get better of him. "She stabbed herself to death with a steak knife. At first, the knife was vertical, so she had to twist the knife in her own body to reach her heart. Two years later, the man married the patient. Four years later, he moved to Konoha. Nineteen years later, the man asked me, 'So you see monsters?'"
Items clattered as it fell to the ground, and beefy fists slammed on the desk. The doctor's face was red, swelling with anger, "Get out."
"To answer your question," said Sasuke. The eighteen-year-old stood up. "- Yes, I see monsters."
Sasuke strolled to the door, sliding a hand into his pocket as he opened the door and walked out. Behind him, he heard the sound of paper ripping and glass shattering. The man was probably tearing the framed pictures of flowers and peace from his wall. Security guards, alarmed by the noise, were rushing to the room.
Sasuke smiled hollowly.
Since the day his parents realized their son saw and loved a dead brother for eight years, they sent him to a psychiatrist for a yearly evaluation along with his medical checkup. Every year, Sasuke left a destroyed doctor in his wake. With the technologies granted to him by his father's corporation, it had been easy to find all the hidden skeletons. Itachi, his deceased brother, would have been proud.
He needed a distraction, he thought sourly.
'Where are you?' Sasuke texted Naruto.
'Sunst Lung,' Naruto Uzumaki immediately texted back. Before Sasuke could ask for a clarification, Naruto sent him another text, 'Sunset Lounge*'
Sasuke had no clue where that was. He was still unfamiliar with the Konoha's college district, having only moved here the last week for school. He headed toward the general direction of the library, impervious to the clattering of nurses and doctors.
Ten minutes later, and two wrong turns later, Sasuke was greeted by an enormous circulation desk, and lined book shelves. In the middle, a grand spiral staircase led up to the second floor. He couldn't see a map. He debated texting Naruto for directions when a kind looking girl with long, red hair smiled at him.
Sasuke walked up to her, careful to put a polite smile on his lips, "Would you happen to know the direction to Sunset Lounge?"
To his relief, the girl didn't try to push herself up against him, touch him back or bat her eyelashes at him. She greeted him with a curious tilt of head, and a distant look. "Yes. It's a long way from here, but I can lead the way, since I'm going there myself."
Sasuke nodded gratefully, "Thank you."
"My name is Mei Terumi," said the girl. She smiled again. They started walking.
"Sasuke Uchiha," said Sasuke. He hoped that was the end to their conversation.
It wasn't, or maybe she just had to have the last word. "It's a good name."
They were in a darker part of the library now. Fewer humans walked by. The shadows were more consistent, flickering along with the dimmer light. Sasuke narrowed his eyes. The library was huge.
Mei glanced at him, "You're a good looking guy."
Sasuke looked at her, raising an eyebrow. Why did it always come to this? If she advanced, he would act a little amused, give a curious tilt of head, and reject the advance. He had plenty of practice with the act. At the moment, he gave a bland compliment in reply, a clear brush-off, "I admire your forwardness."
She giggled.
Fifteen meters away, Sasuke could see a door, 'Sunset Lounge' in block letters above the door. Naruto waved from underneath it, his blond hair flying in the air was he ran over.
"Damn, Sasuke-teme, you sure took your time," said Naruto. He glanced at his watch. "You texted me seventeen minutes ago."
"Great room to pick," Sasuke bit out. "It takes ten minutes to get here from the entrance."
Naruto smirked. "Poor Sasuke, you coulda just took those stairs."
Naruto pointed to a large spiral staircase. Sasuke recognized it as the one he saw in the lobby.
With a growl, Sasuke turned to question the girl that led him on the detour. No one was next to him. The fluorescent light reflected from the cracked wall to the empty ground next to him. Sasuke ignored the rising sickness in his stomach. Some part of his mind refused to accept the fact, while another prepared for action.
Naruto blinked in confusion, "You okay, man?"
"Did you see where that girl walking with me went?" Sasuke was tempted to run his hand through the air next to him to confirm the lack of a body.
"You were walking alone the whole time," said Naruto. The man gave him a questioning look, uncertainty in his voice.
Sasuke felt goose bumps rise on his skin. His mind clouded with the need to concoct a quick solution to Naruto's answer and justify his own panic. The more sadistic part of his mind taunted that perhaps Naruto was also fake.
"Of course, dobe," he answered with a smirk, digging his nails into his palm to keep focused. He was good at self-control. "You mean you don't get what I said?"
Naruto took a minute to think. He finally reached the conclusion Sasuke knew he would draw.
"Oh, you bastard. So you took your sweet time with a detour because some cute tail snuggled up."
Sasuke offered a small smile.
"So how was the doctor?" asked Naruto. Any lack of vocal response always drove Naruto to change the topic. The man had a short patience span.
"Unpleasant." Sasuke released the breath he realized he was holding.
"You business people, and the need the psychoanalyze everything," said Naruto. "I still can't believe your parents demand an IQ test every year."
Sasuke told anyone who knew, namely and solely Naruto, that his yearly visits to the doctor was for an IQ report.
As they walked into the Sunset Lounge, Naruto waved to their group of friends. Kiba Inuzuki, Ino Yamanaka, and Sakura Haruno waved back. When they approached the table, the three scooted back and made space. Sasuke sat next to Ino, who was once again absorb in her cell phone.
"You guys would never guess why this loser was so late," said Naruto. Beside him, Sasuke tensed. Sasuke rolled his eyes for the effect, in case anyone was looking at him.
"He got lost," said Kiba. He looked up carelessly from the magazine he was flipping through.
At the same time, Sakura gave Naruto a friendly smack over his head. The movement was enough to shift the center of attention from Sasuke's delayed arrival to Naruto's shenanigans. Sasuke reminded himself to treat Sakura better in the future.
"Ow! Whaddaya do that for?" Naruto gave an exaggerated grin, seizing the opportunity to snatch Sakura's hand and secure it to her waist, accidentally-on-purpose brushing against her stomach in the process. He gave a mischievous grin.
The group fell into its usual bickering. Sakura and Kiba were Naruto's most supportive friends, but they would never let an opportunity to tease the blond slip. Naruto took it good-naturally. Sasuke pretended to smile at normalcy of the activities. He scanned the room. Part of his mind nagged him about the frightening possibility of seeing yet another mirage. He wouldn't be able to handle it. Sasuke reminded himself that as long as he didn't initiate contact or acknowledge them, the dead wouldn't bother him. A flash of black caught his eyes. Turning his vision to the entrance, he saw Neji Hyuuga, entering the room with Hinata Hyuuga beside him.
Sasuke felt a familiar defensiveness grip his body, new tension overriding his previous tension. He was extremely wary of the Hyuuga, because he knew of the man's ruthlessness nature. But Naruto insisted on befriending Hinata, and along with her, her cousin. Sasuke warned Naruto that befriending Neji was akin to swallowing honeyed cyanide. Naruto didn't understand the reference.
Sasuke turned back to the table.
Naruto had Kiba in a headlock on the table while Ino watched the exchange. Sakura threw him curious glances. He offered her a small nod, something he would never have offered three years ago, when she pursued him. She smiled back, and they turned to the two scrabbling.
"Dude, I will get you back for that. Just wait—" Naruto broke off, a wide smile spreading over his lips as he looked up and noticed the approaching Hyuugas. He released Kiba. "Your girlfriend's coming over right now."
"She's not my girlfriend," Kiba automatically replied. His fingers twitched slightly and Sasuke noticed a not-so subtle attempt to fix his collar.
Naruto gave an energetic wave as Hinata and Neji walked over. Kiba moved over to make room, and Hinata took a seat after a gentle, reassuring push from her cousin. Neji remained standing, shaking his head slightly at the offered seat.
"You're not staying, Neji?" said Naruto. Neji was one of Naruto's favorite friends, because the Hyuuga prodigy would help him with schoolwork whenever Naruto asked.
"I have some work to do," said Neji. He offered an apologetic smile.
"Dude, you're always busy," said Kiba. Kiba was also overly fond of Neji, possibly because of Hinata. "Kinda forgetting that you're just nineteen, and still got years ahead of ya."
"I have much to learn," Neji ducked his head shyly, allowing a few strands of silky hair to curtain his face, as if to hide a light blush. It was a mendacious performance.
"Uchiha-kun is rather quiet," said Neji, diverting the topic. He gave a small smile at Sasuke's direction. It was slightly unsure, and infinitely kind.
"Hn," Sasuke internally rolled his eyes. It was really impractical of Neji subject him to the same empty politeness, when he could hear the mockery beneath each word.
"He's always like that," said Naruto.
Good excuse, thought Sasuke.
He nearly sighed in relief when Neji's gaze left him, and the long-haired businessman turned to leave the room. Artificial personality aside, Neji's disturbing eyes reminded Sasuke of things no longer alive. It was not a reminder Sasuke needed, especially not right now.
"Excuse me," said Sasuke. The words were half-genuine, half-sarcastic. He had to be alone to gather his thoughts.
"You sure you're alright?" Naruto grabbed his sleeve again. Sasuke could see real concern in Naruto's eyes.
"Of course, you silly dobe," Sasuke smiled. He could easily find reasons to excuse himself, because everyone knew Fugaku was unforgiving about lateness. "I forgot I had to preview a new product blueprint by tonight."
Naruto's deposition suddenly changed, "Oi! Teme, you're going to pull that 'Too busy because I'm a workaholic' on us too?"
Sasuke gave a small shrug. He forced himself to walk casually from the table. In truth, he stung over Naruto's last comment. He was always compared to the Hyuuga. The media often showcased the two together, pitting them as fierce rivals. Neji's white eyes haunted his ambitions, as well as his dreams. It was almost as bad as his hallucinations.
Once he was in the hallway, the Uchiha heir pulled out his cell phone, and opened a classified search engine. A few clicks told him Mei Terumi had been murdered in Konoha Library three months ago, in the public bathroom on the fourth floor. Someone slit her throat with a razor blade, before disfiguring her face. Scrolling down the page, Sasuke found a picture of the dead girl, lying in a pool of her own blood, eyes gazing insidiously at the camera.
Sasuke closed his eyes to block out the image, but he couldn't shake the image of Mei Terumi from his mind. Distantly, his mind went back to the empty ground. He was a mere three meters away from where Mei disappeared into thin air.
Alone in the hallway, Sasuke was afraid that if he opened his eyes, a pair of very dead eyes would stare back at him.
Yanamato's question mocked him, So you see monsters?
A/N: Gosh, the first version of this story was horrific, once I reread it with a critical eye. The plot was all over the place, and the flow was disruptive. There were so much back story, fillers, rushes, drags, and awkward moments. So I reworked it. Believe me, I really want this story to work out. I'm positive this new version is at least 100% better in terms of ...well, everything.
I'm sorry for all the changes on this one story. u_u
What do you think?