Author's note: I decided to write this thing when I remembered one of my favorite scenes in that 70's show (awesome show guys), soooo here goes:
Soul: Hyde (totally can see why)
Kid: Eric (because he's so organized!)
Crona: Donna (Crona's too sweet to be anyone else ^_^)
Maka: Jackie (they both call all the guys idiots right?)
Ox: Fezz (OH COME ON, I JUST HAD TO MAKE HIM FEZZ! Lol!)
Explanation: Black Star invited Kid, Crona, Maka, Soul, and Ox to eat at a restaurant, and everyone is under the impression that he is buying.
By the way this is a rewrite ok? It's just that last time, it got deleted, so I got rid of the script format and added a whole bunch of 'he said' and 'she said'. Hopefully it won't be taken down this time. Anyways sorry! I should really be updating 'kisses' but I just had to rewrite this! A new chapter for 'Kisses' will be up soon don't worry.
IMPORTANT INFO: Crona's a girl in this story! So no arguments!
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"H-hey, Black Star, t-thanks for dinner. It was g-g-great." Crona said looking around at the fancy looking restaurant. Black Star had invited them all to go eat here after he messed up Kid's house (again) by accident, burned Maka and Ox's favorite copy of Harry Potter, and dumped water on Soul and Crona. So this was kind of pay back, which was weird because Black Star didn't usually try to make up anything for anyone.
"Yes, it was delicious." Said Kid, pushing his plate away and smiling at Black Star approvingly, Crona gave a tiny smile at this, she was just glad he wasn't spazzing out anymore.
"Hey, guys, no need to thank me. I'm happy to do it." He looks around and picks up his stuff, "alright, everybody ready?" He whispered leaning against the table suspiciously, giving everyone a weird look. "...Uh, don't you have to pay first?" Kid said back in disbelief, looking at Black Star with a WTF look on his face. He turned to Crona a little as if asking her 'what is going on'. But Crona just nervously shrugged in return. She actually had no idea what was going on.
"Psh! I'm not paying!" Black Star laughed slamming his left palm on the table. Everyone sat completley shocked at this, WHAT THE HELL DID HE MEAN HE WASN'T PAYING!?
"H-huh?" Crona said startled, a little calmer than everyone else.
"What, did you think your god was paying?" Black Star said laughing.
"Of course. Black Star. They don't have any money" Kid said motioning over to everyone else at the table, "and Liz and Patty have custody of my credit cards at this time…" He said again as he slumped in his seat kinda sad.
"Why do Liz and Patty have your credit cards?" Soul asked, forgetting about how pissed he was at Black Star for an instant.
"I was just purchasing a couple of new portraits to hide the paint stains and repair the symmetry of my home….seeing as Liz and Patty completely obliterated the order by playing with their stupid paint ball guns, GAH UTTERLY RUINED! HOW COULD THEY!-"
"Ok calm down, having mental breakdowns isn't cool….how many portraits did your buy anyways?" Soul said trying to keep Kid from having a mental break down.
"300."
The table went completley silent as they all just stared at Kid, save for Crona who didn't want to make him feel awkward.
"…HEY! PAY ATTENTION TO ME! Ok you don't need any money. People, we are on a "dine and dash" here. Oh, yeah. Because the only thing better than eating lobster is eating lobster and hauling ass. Let's haul ass!" Black Star encouraged, he then tried to get up but was imediatly dragged down by Kid.
Kid glared at Black Star, hell's fire is in his eyes. "Black Star, what the hell were you thinking? You said you'd take care of it." Kid said in a deathly quite voice, doing a total 180 from his earlier distressed state.
" And I took care of it!… by planning the dine and dash!" Black Star said, stupidly brushing aside Kid's earlier scary tone.
"Black Star, we can't do t-this…." Crona said doing her best to get Black Star to stay and not upset Kid and Maka more than he already had. She didn't like confrontations.
"Why not? Guys, we're making memories here!" Black Star anounced ruffling Crona's hair, still oblivious to Maka's, Soul's, and more importantly, Kid's rage (Kid was a good friend, but when angered he was...everyone's worst nightmare).
"But it's w-wrong….I don't think I can deal with doing something wrong…" Crona said tugging at her left arm.
"Ok, Wrong? Or hilarious?" Said Black Star, turning to Crona and grinning from ear to ear. Kid swears that if he weren't such a composed reaper, he would have punched Black Star then and there for getting so close to Crona.
"Wrong, you asymmetrical moron!" Kid yelled, smacking the back of Black Star's head. Symmetrically of course. Ok so maybe he isn't so composed. Soul took the time to speak up then. "Or hilariously wrong? I like it. But then again, I'm from the underbelly of society, so-"
"Uh, yes, excuse me. Um, would you please send your finest imported beer to Kim(1) and tell her that when I said "Hi" when I walked in here, what I meant was, "I'll take you like a stallion." Ox said inturrupting Soul, as he talked to some random waiter. The waiter turned to Ox, his expression clearly saying 'bitch who the hell do you think your talking to!?'
" You got that? Like a stallion?" Ox continued to say, not getting it.
"Ox, stop ordering stuff!" Maka said, ready to throw a hissy fit. She wishes more than anything that she had brought a book.(2) Ox chuckled before turning to Maka, "Okay, you need to chill out little girl. Didn't you hear Black Star? The Deathyard is having a dine-and-dash promotion. Everything is free!"
Maka face palmed. "It's not free, Ox! Dine and dash is when you run out without paying."
" So it's stealing?….This isn't going to help me with Kim, is it?" Ox said as Maka sadly shook her head before slamming it onto the table. "Excuse me" Ox said as he leaned over to whispered something in Crona's ear. Who whispered in Kid's ear, Black Star then leaned from his place next to Kid to hear the secret that was being passed on. And that's when Kid wet both of his fingers and stuffed them in both of Black Star's ears. Even to this day, Kid concluded that victory never felt so sweet.
"HEY!" Black Star screamed.
Ox glares at him from across the table. "That's from me, you son of a bitch."
Maka crossed her arms and glared at Black Star before saying through clenched teeth "Black Star, I have never dined and dashed, and I'm not about to start now!"
"Uh, well… Remember when you Tsubaki and me went to nice restaurants and I told you two to wait in the car while I paid? Did you ever wonder why I was running to the car?" Black Star said sarcastically.
"o_0 ,Oh, my God. I'm a thief." Maka said freaking out and waving her fingers around.
"I think technically you're an accessory. Which should make you happy, because you love accessories, earrings, bracelets, bangles, bows..." Soul said smiling at Maka mockingly.
"Shut up!"
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Meanwhile, Ox walked up to Kim "* So, did you enjoy your pilsner? Did you get the message about the stallion?" He said wiggling an eyebrow.
"Okay, look, okay? You can't send beer to the hostess podium, okay? I almost got fired. So just pretend you don't know me,okay?!" Kim angrily said.
"I don't think I do know you, Kim!" Ox said shocked out of his mind. He then angrily stomped back to his table. "Kim has upset me… I can't wait to dine and dash on her ass- her beautiful ass." Ox said anouncing this to everyone.
"Cool, I'll go first." Soul said smirking.
"Soul, we're not doing this! And especially not you, 'cause you're on probation." Maka said freaking out. She reached out a hand to stop her partner.
"So what?" Said Soul.
"So what? Y-you get caught, you g-go to jail, a-and I've h-heard nothing good about jail! NOTHING!" Crona said twitching in her seat...it seems the poor girl still hasn't forgotten Ragnorak's visit to prison. (3)
"I haven't done one stinkin' illegal thing since I got probation." Soul said frusterated...and still trying to get Maka to let go of his clothes.
"So, what, you're mad because you haven't committed any crimes since your last crime?" Kid said sarcastically.
"Yeah, so I'm going." Soul puts on his jacket and everything suddenly goes in slow motion as he starts to walk towards the exit. Kim walkes up to Soul, talking slow and distorted. " Cccaaaann I heeeeelllpppp yooooouuuu?" The staff all look at Soul and he gets this terrified look on his face before he nods "no" in slow motion and runs back to the table.
"SOUL!….What happened?" Black Star says kinda confused.
Soul was sweatin' bullets as his eyes dart around Crona style. "T-this place is like A-Alcatraz, man. There's no way out. I can't do it. I've gone soft, man. I'm like Maka. It...SICKENS ME!
"MAKA CHOP!" Maka yelled as she slammed a menu onto Soul's head...which didn't really have the same effect cuz well...it's a freakin' menu not a 800 page hardcover.
"Mm. So you can't do it. I wonder why. Why, oh, why?" Kid said again in a sarcastic tone.
Crona shyly raised her hand at this "I-I think I know why Kid-kun…"
Kid's attitude totally changed when he heard Crona and he turned to her smiling brightly (while trying to ignore Soul and Black Star's snickers of course.) "Yes, Crona?"
"B-because it's w-wrong." Crona answered looking down at her hands timidly.
"That's right, Miss Makenshi! It's wrong!" Kid anounced smiling softly at her first before turning to glare at Soul and Black Star. Back to sarcasm.
"Gee, what a surprise. Mom and Dad don't want to do it." Black Star said rolling his eyes.
Crona's face flushed red. "W-we are not Mom and Dad. A-and we're not l-leaving without paying, young man!" she said wagging a finger at Black Star teacher like.
"Fine. The great Black Star will pay for the stupid dinner. Now just give me your stupid keys! so I can get my money out of Ox's stupid car!(A/N: XD I have no idea if Ox has a car or not)" Black Star said annoyed, snatching the keys from Kid's open hand. Ox still totally distracted. " I don't care if you're in the freakin' Olympics about to run the freakin' hundred-yard dash... If someone sends you a beer, you say thank you...AND DRINK THE FREAKIN' BEER!"
(Some time later)
Crona pulls on Kid's sleeve a little worried. "Um, K-kid-kun? Did B-Black Star leave his m-money at h-home? 'Cause he just drove a-away in the c-car."
"What? No. No, he wouldn't ditch us." He said confidently.
"A-are you s-sure? 'Cause as he d-drove past he was doing t-this." Crona makes a face like 'I got ya!'.
Kid shakes his head and smiles at her "No. Crona, he's kidding. He wouldn't ditch us."
Half an hour later...
"He ditched us!" Kid said.
"Ooooh, I d-don't k-kow how t-to deal w-with being d-ditched!" Crona mumbled.
Ox adjusts his weirdo glasses. "I'm sure he's right outside. I'll go get him."
"Ox, I don't know…." Maka said afraid that Ox was going to do the same thing.
"Don't worry. I'll go and get the money and come back. You can trust me." Ox said nicely getting up to go.
Another half hour later ...
"He's not coming back!" Maka said pissed.
"And we trusted him! This isn't cool at all!" Soul said starting to get mad too.
"What a lier. You know what? I'm just gonna call my dad, and he'll come pay for our dinner." Said Maka getting up to leave.
Kid just turned to her a little suspicious. "Okay, but, Maka, if you don't come back..."
Maka makes an you've-got-to-be-kidding-me look, "Kid, please. I'm not immature like those two idiots."
Yet another half hour later...
"She is immature like those idiots!" Said Kid getting angry as Crona placed a hand on his shoulder doing her best to calm him down.
"I can't believe I got stuck here with the squares." Said Soul.
"We are not squares!" Kid yelled almost getting up before Crona tugged at his arm gently.
"Kid, w-wait, s-settle down. You m-might upset your s-stomach…." (A/N Hah! Poor darling Crona...your not helping.)
"This is bad, man. If I'm not fighting against the system, I am the system!" Soul said freaking out a little. "Screw this I'm going!" He said getting up and running as fast as he could to the door.
"BANZAI!"
Kid stared shocked at the entrance, Crona was seated next to him with a blank expression on her face. She had kind of seen that one coming.
(some time later.)
"Okay, I can take the check now. Or whenever... or NOW." An impatient waiter said tapping his foot as he glared at the remaining couple.
"Uh...Two more Bananas Foster, please." Kid said awkwardly.
"K-kid, what are you d-doing?" Crona said.
"I'm stalling. They'll come back. I mean, joke's over, you know?" Kid said trying his best to be reassuring.
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Back at Soul's and Maka's house, Soul, Black Star, Maka and Oxford are in the circle.
"Best thing about this joke, it just keeps going and going! Hahaha! And not only did we break the law...we screwed our friends while breaking the law!" Said Soul grinning with his sharp teeth.
"How dumb was he to give me the car keys? I mean, who here trusts me?" Black Star said, still laughing at his awsome 'prank.'
"Psh! No way." Said Soul.
Maka shakes her head, "Not me."
"THANK YOU!"
"You know what? Stolen food does taste better. Dinner roll?" Said Ox waving some food around.
"I don't know guys, I feel bad about Crona and Kid. Crona's probably having a mental break down right now… Maybe we should figure out a way to help them." Maka said feeling guilty about leaving her friend alone (she still doesn't trust Kid to be alone with Crona.)
"Sure, we could do that. Or... we could ask ourselves, "How can we make this worse?" Said Soul, an evil smirk on his lips.
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Back at the restaurant a blushing Kid and Crona surrounded by staff.
Everyone, "Happy anniversary! happy anniversary! happy anniversary! Kid and Crona! With best wishes from Soul, Black Star, Oxford and Maka." A waiter said dropping a cake onto the table.
"Damn-it! I can't believe those guys screwed us like this!" Kid yelled furious and kind of embarresed.
"W-well, at l-least we still have e-each other." Crona offered hopfully.
"You know what? You're right Crona. I can't count on much in this crazy world, but I can always count on you." Said Kid turning to Crona.
Crona patts Kid's arm and smiles slightly. "T-that is t-true. I h-have to go to the b-bathroom."
"Okay." Said Kid before he realizes something and draggs her back down. "H-hey! Why don't you just sit your lyin' ass down?"
Crona slightly stunned looks at Kid. " K-kid! don't you t-trust me?"
Kid chuckles darkly. "Not as far as I can throw you, and that ain't far!"
Crona fakes a hurt look on her face at Kid's accusation (which was actually pretty spot on.) "H-how can you s-say t-that? O-okay, so I noticed t-the fire exit was n-next to the bathroom. D-doesn't mean I'd u-use it. I h-happened to notice it, that's all. It's v-very c-convenient!" Crona said.
Kid immediatly feels guilty about yelling at Crona and says in a soft voice only reserved for her. "Crona, don't you see what's happening? They've turned us against each other..."
Crona makes a 'holy crap I get it face'….."Y-you're r-right. I was g-gonna use the fire e-exit. I was!" She says feeling guilty too.
"You know why they do this? Because they know we won't get them back. We're responsible, mature "Mom and Dad." We just... We won't stoop to their level." Says Kid getting frusterated.
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"Well, damn it! let's stoop to their level or an even lower level!" Crona says for once not stuttereing as she gets a pissed off look on her face.
And believe me the only thing scarier than a pissed of Kid is a furious Crona.
Kid looks up at her a little scared and surprised before getting a devious look on his face. "Oh, I'm with you baby, yeah...There's just one problem. We can't do it from in here." Both Kid and Crona look at each other, then after a few seconds nod. Crona's hand reaches out for Kid's and he wraps his fingers around her's. Slowley, they get up.
"If I don't make it... tell Chi-chiu I'm sorry." Kid says, looking around the room dramatically.
"D-don't talk like t-that." Crona say whispering in his ear, a determined expression is on her face as she makes eye contact with Kid, "You'll tell him yourself."
And without a second thought, the odd couple runs out of the restaurant as fast as they can. Hands entertwined and heart's racing as the rest of the staff chases after them.
A/N: So this took me a while to write, I would seriously love reviews guys (don't roast me alive please!). UnTiL NeXt TiMe!
Whew! Lot of akward words here. Not use to using a lot of the words I put in here, but I made the effort to make it sound a little more proper for you peeps!
(1) Kim works at a restaurant in this fic...
(2) Maka forgot her book!? ...look it was bound to happen at least once lol.
Kid and Crona were already together in this fic, don't know if yall got that one.
REVIEW!