The Dead Man's What?
Author's Note: I'm back! I know you're excited for the sequel! Ok I lied, I don't know if you are or not, but I am! I suppose I should place a disclaimer up here should I not? Well here you go.
I own absolutely nothing except the figments of my imagination, i.e. Esmeralda. There, happy now?
Chapter One: Soldier say what?
Esme POV
"Esme, land ho." Not this again. Bart, I'm going to murder him slowly, and painfully. He really has to get it into his head, I"m captain, I know what I'm doing!
"Hannon lle." (Thank you.) I could feel my eye twitching. I need a vacation away from the rat.
"Breathe, we'll hit land soon, and then you can throttle him, not now though, not yet." I smiled when I felt Legolas' arms snake around my waist, I bet it was more to keep me from chasing Bart around the deck than anything.
"How surprised do you think Aragorn's going to be to see us?" Its been almost ten years since we last saw our Kingly Ranger, and a lot has changed. Actually I lied, not from this end, maybe his. "I wonder how many children he had Arwen pop out?" I heard Legolas make a strange noise and I turned and stuck my tongue out at him.
"Funny how I should be used to such speech coming from you, but I'm not." I winked. He didn't know the half of it. 'What I'm really curious about, is whether William and Elizabeth got married." I snorted, leave it to him to care about that kinda stuff.
"Ah who cares, I never really liked her a lot. Ok, not at all." Legolas continued to stare at me with his eyebrow raised. 'Ok I hated her, happy now?" He nodded before walking over to Edward who was washing the deck. Stupid blighter, always making me feel like an idiot. By the time we had reached the wharf it was dark, and I had already succeed in tripping over Edward's pail. Just my luck really.
"Walk much?"Edward snarled, trying to fix the mess I had made of his cleaning, I smirked at him, and shook my boot spraying water in his face.
"No, I usually hitch a ride, but since none were available, I had to take the second choice." I patted him on the head and walked over the the rail. "Well here goes nothing, coming Legolas?"
'Already on solid ground." He waved at me, wow I really wasn't paying attention.
"Thanks for telling me you were leaving butt face." I quickly joined him and linked arms, before waltzing up the levels of Minas tirith to reach the Citadel. "Boy, I can't wait to see Aragorn's face when we show up!" Legolas chuckled and mumbled something about me being a little kid, I stuck my tongue out at him in reply. So what if I proved his point. 'TO THE CITADEL!" I pointed ahead and marched with my head arched back, I heard Legolas warn me of something, but I didn't listen. I ran right into some woman carrying a tray of the nastiest things I'd ever seen, they were like human toes but not really. I think one just went down my dress ,excuse me while I go die won't you?
"Calm down!" He grabbed me and stopped me from my current state of running in circle screaming obscenities of how disgusting that was. It took me a minute to gather my breathe back, the woman was still trying to gather her fallen toes. Yuck. 'Better?" I nodded, he shook his head and grabbed my hand again. What would I do with out him? Ok don't answer that, it would probably be something very bad.
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"ARAGORN! Did you miss me!" I smiled as large as I could at the poor man looking startled, for lack of better word. Legolas was standing, docile as a rock beside me, smiling at his long time friend. Poor Aragorn's chest was heaving up and down in surprise, I love that feeling.
"Where did you come from?" He was still trying to catch his breath.
'That's all your going to say after not seeing me for ten years? I feel unloved Aragorn." I pouted until he stood laughing to give me a hug. Yeah, I'm a sap for that. 'Well to answer you're question, we just sailed in from Barbados, a couple hundred leagues south of Tortuga." He nodded at me and turned to Legolas.
"You're tan." I couldn't' help but start laughing, honestly, who says that? Legolas laughed as well before embracing him in hug. "So, how is the sea life treating you, more precisely, Esme treating you?" I glared at him and crossed my arms, Legolas smiled at me.
"Well, I hate the ship, I hate the people on the ship, I hate the ocean, but most of all, I hate Esme bossing me around all the time." I opened my mouth in protest before Legolas kissed me on the temple. "I'm only joking Esme, don't get angry." Thats what I though fat head.
"Sounds like you're getting along fairly well." Aragorn smirked at Legolas before turning back to his throne. Don't think I didn't catch that little display of testosterone they shared just then.
"Enough about us, you tell us what's happening here on the mainland?" I'm going to at least act like I'm interested.
"Not much actually. I have two sons, one of which is turning ten tomorrow, the other is two." So we had missed something. 'I should hope you can stay that long, I deem he would find it quite an honor to have the two of you there, especially after all the tales he's heard." Aragorn smiled, I started to blush.
'I should only hope that he only hear the good ones." Aragorn laughed and nodded, then looked over my shoulder, I followed his direction and turned to see two little kids poking their heads out from around the column. Speak of the devil. Literally, I hate children. "Aren't you two supposed to be out in the gardens with your mother?" He was practically cooing at them, I looked at Legolas and it took all my restraint not to start laughing. Aragorn, one of the Dunadains, the king of Minas Tirith, was cooing.
"They were, we though we heard voices and decided to come see who it was, isn't that right Thain?" The youngest one walked forward nodding at Arwen, sucking his thumb. Remind me not to come near him, I really don't want his slobber all over me. I smiled at Arwen as she picked him up and walked towards me. 'To what do we owe this spontaneous visit?"
'We missed you all so much!" I grinned like a mad man, succeeding in making the little brat giggle. I stuck my hand out at him, he just stared from it to me."I'm Esme, and you are?" He made some gurgling noises and didn't reply.
'This is Thain, and the one hiding over there is Eladrion. 'Aragorn walked forward and placed his hand on Thain's head and kissed Arwen. They were really cute for an old couple.
'Well Thain, I better start you're training early.' he gurgled some more, I smiled and pointed at Legolas. 'You see that pointed eared nancing elf over there, he's Legolas. He's really lame." I heard Eladrion laugh while Legolas scoffed before walking over to us, I winked at Eladrion who had yet to come from the column.
'You know, insults are not very nice, especially if the person in question is right behind you." he grabbed me and started tickling me until I was crying from laughing. 'Yield?"
'NEVER!" I continued to try to get him to stop, he finally did but I don't think it was because of my merciful pleading. I sat up to see Eladrion laughing and sitting atop the Prince of Mirkwood, who was sprawled on the floor in the most ungraceful manner I've ever seen. I could hear Aragorn and Arwen laughing as well, the little blighter liked me already, I feel loved.
"I got him now! Papa! Did you see it! I took out the Prince of Mirkwood! He's not that tough!" Eladrion stood and ran to his father as Legolas shared a look with me, I couldn't help, that little tyke was quite the comedian.
"So it would seen Eladrion." Aragorn smirked at the elf still sitting on the floor moping.
"Yeah, the prince is quite soft to be sure." I received a punch in the arm, it just made me laugh harder.
'I'm Eladrion, nice to meet you finally!" I stepped back when said ten year old walked up as calm as could be and stuck his hand in my face to shake, I looked at Legolas who shrugged, and then clasped his hand in mine.
"And you too mate." That was slightly weird.
"Are you going to come to my birthday? That would make every body jealous!" He was acting quite young to be ten years already.
'I don't believe you want her there, she might break something." Legolas was bending over to whisper this in Eladrion's ear, so I naturally kicked his butt and knocked him over. "Why must I be on the floor so much?"
"Because you obviously like it there." I said acting like he was stupid, I tsked and turned to Aragorn. "So, where do we stay?"
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"Well today is Eladrion's tenth birthday, I wonder how big Aragorn is gonna make the celebration?" I looked over my shoulder at Legolas who was pulling his boot on. I woke up later than Legolas, and still got faster than him. Oops, guess I said that out loud, he threw his boot at me but missed. 'Well, someone's grumpy when they first wake up.
'You would be too, if you'd found a spider in your leggings you were about to put on." He glared at me and went to retrieve the other boot, as he bent over I couldn't resist adding insult to injury and smacked him, he bolted upright and raised his eyebrow.
'There was a spider." He rolled his eye and walked through the door, boot still in hand. Maybe I should tell him, nah...
'Were you going to tell me I hadn't put my shoe on, or were you going to let me step in horse crap first?" He said raising his perfectly plucked eyebrow. Don't tell him I spilled his secret, he still doesn't know I know. But, it's ok, I love him no matter how much better his eyebrows look than mine.
"Well, I was actually gonna let you step in the crap first, but since you asked, you forgot your shoe." He rolled his eyes, and started jumping trying to get his shoe on, it took a good ten minutes before he was successful. "So much for warrior elven speed Speedy Gonzales." He grabbed my hand and pulled me into his chest. "Would you like to dance?" I wiggled my eyebrows but he just rolled his eyes and kissed my forehead before letting me go. So much for anger.
'You will inevitably be the death of me Esme."
"But you wouldn't have it any other way!" I smiled when he turned to scoff at me before walking into the throne room to find Aragorn. Eladrion was sitting said throne wearing Aragorn's little winged crown and shouting orders like a mad man. "Legolas, maybe you should go sure you 'toughness' and shut that thing up?"
"That's more likely your job, I'd rather the little heathen liked me." I snorted at him and placed a big smile on my face, might as well make it look like I'm enjoying it.
"Happy birthday Eladrion!" I ran forward with my arms out for a hug, he giggled and ran into me, I grunted with breath he knocked out of me. I could practically hear Legolas smirking, so naturally I smirked. 'Say hello to Legolas won't you?" I threw Eladrion into Legolas, poor nancing elf almost fell over, I made a tutting noise and turned to talk with Aragorn.
'Well, we'll be leaving in about a minute, so are you ready to deal with all those little kids?" He smirked at the revolted face I made and turned to look where Legolas was playing with Eladrion. I swear he's more of the motherly type than I am, but I won't tell him that.
"Hey Mother Hen!" Legolas stopped to glare at me, I smiled sweetly, 'Time to go!" Eladrion smiled huge and ran to Aragorn to be picked up. Now he is way old enough to be walking on his own, but if they want to baby him, I'm not going to say anything.
We had walked halfway to the Citadel when we all noticed a huge change in Eladrion's demeanor. He had wriggled out of Aragorn's hold on him, and stood straight and didn't talk to any of us unless we asked him an important question. I looked a Aragorn who just shrugged, now that little kid was trying to run all over us. So I smiled at Legolas before we both tiptoed up behind him, and grabbed his arms and started to swing him as we stepped. We thought he was gonna get the guards of the city to kill us he was screaming so loud. Then we found out he was laughing. Now my ears are bleeding, and it's only ten in the morning.
"Well, this is a nice turn out huh?" Aragorn stood facing the citadel that was full of people. You couldn't walk through it without knocking at least five people off the sides.
'Did you mean for this party to be this big?" Arwen whispered through a perfectly plastered smile.
"Not originally." Aragorn had the same face looked at Arwen and began to walk down to start greeting people. I felt something jerking my hand and found that I had forgotten to release Eladrion who was trying to run over to his friends waiting for him, I smiled at him and released him, he almost fell. Oops. Legolas snorted and rolled his eyes at me before following Aragorn. I wonder if he knows how much he looks like a mad horse when he does that?
'I do now." Shit. That always happens, I smiled hugely and gave him a hug.
'But I love you?" He patted my head and continued to walk towards the King who was now surrounded on all sides by his people. "Maybe we shouldn't interrupt...I'm thinking.." Then I saw them, soldiers piling in from all sides, everywhere I looked they were knocking people over and heading towards were Aragorn and Arwen were. 'Shit, Legolas, we might not want to be seen."
"What? Why-oh." I grabbed his hand and ran towards Aragorn and Arwen.
"Sorry to cut our visit so short but, we might have to leave early."
'What ever for?"
'Well, we stole something of impeccable value not to long ago, and I believe that those soldiers running a much around your son's party, may be after us." I smiled and turned to run, but hit one guard right in the chest. No wonder Legolas had been poking my shoulder for the last minute, I turned to smile at him, 'You could have just told me mate."
"Well Well Well, if it isn't just two we were looking for." I smiled, and looked to find who was talking. 'We have arrest warrants for a Mister and Misses Legolas Thrandulion." Both Legolas and I started to laugh, I was on the point of leaning on him.
'Now who said anything about that?" I gasped out, the sentry looked highly miffed so I stopped.
"IF you would have let me finish, you Lady Esmeralda and Sir Legolas are under arrest hence forth." Two more stepped forward to cuff us but Aragorn cut them off.
'Just what are the charges?" the sentry looked startled to be talking to the King he hastily bowed and almost lost his wig, I started to laughing but Aragorn gave me one of his infamous glares.
"For helping a certain pirate escape his hanging. Surely you remember a mister Jack Sparrow."
"Captain." But Legolas and I snarled, making the man step back. I smirked at him and he glared.
"If you say so." I looked around and noticed that only the front of us had sentries, if we turned and ran they couldn't open fire because there were so many civilians, I subtly kicked Legolas in the back of the knee and gestured to that way when the guard insisted on reading off our crimes to Aragorn who was listening and groaning, I bet he just wished he could have thought of that. We slowly started to back up and noticed none of them moved, so I smiled at Arwen, and turned and sprinted off into the crowd with Legolas following. 'AFTER THEM!" I was laughing the whole way, there was no way they could catch us.
"Esme! Up ahead! There's a cliff!" Legolas had started to slow down and turned, I shook my head and continued to run ahead. Not long after I learned he was right, I could practically here him making some smart comment about being stupid pirates and being stupidly stubborn. I ran by him and patted him on the shoulder.
'Esmeralda! Legolas! Where are you going?" We skidded to a stop and saw Eladrion watching us like a hawk.
"Um, we, just remembered we had unfinished business to take care of and that we'll be back later!" Just at that moment one sentry came flying from my right and Legolas practically jumped on the guy. I continued to smile at Eladrion whose mouth was wide open in amazement. Who ever said it was wrong to leave in style?
"Whoa! That's amazing!" I turned to look behind Eladrion and saw all his little buddies smiling as well, I groaned. This is not what we needed.
'Sit!" They did and I lobbed my sword at another guard who was trying to sneak around behind them. I swaggered over and pulled my sword out, wiped it on his chest, and ran back to Legolas. "Time to go?"
'Agreed!" We turned to run up the steps only to be stopped by all the soldiers. Damn Eladrion and his questions.
"Well, you can think of this as the day you almost escaped."
"No thanks, that would make me sound like Jack, and that's never a good thing." The soldier glared and motioned for us to be cuffed. I just continued to smile at him, happy as could be. 'Watch it. Thats my butt your touching mister, I may be cuffed but I still have feet." The sentry who had been hand cuffing me ran back to his station blood red, Legolas was snickering at him.
'Now if you please, Lord Beckett wishes to receive you in port Royal."
"Beckett. That sounds oddly familiar." I shrugged and followed after them to their ship, my only hope is that Aragorn doesn't kill me when I next see him.
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"Well look who it is." I startled awake with a little grunt, and stared around trying to find the voice. I stood and look, still nothing. "Down here Esmeralda." I started and looked down.
'Beckett? What a long time no see!" I smiled and continued to look for Legolas.
"Your friend has been placed in another cell." I looked across to see Legolas raising his eyebrow at me. I shrugged and turned to look back at Beckett.
"Oh come on, why the separation mate?"
'It's Lord now."
"Lord? Ahahahahaha, as if. You could never get a title if you tried!" I stood shaking with laughter as the little angry figure stood fuming. A vein in his forehead was even ticking.
"Well I am now!" His snarl made e sit back down, I blinked a few times, and he continued to fume. "Now, I just thought I would drop by and tell you your charges."
"Already know them thanks." I started humming a song and cleaning my fingernails, Beckett started to fume again.
'Yes I know! But I though you might want to know that your punishment is death!"
"WHAT?!" Both Legolas and I screamed, affectively making Beckett jump.
"Yes, now that I have your attention, you five sentenced to death."
"Can you count? Or maybe your drunk? Because there are two of us here right now?"
'Four actually." I jumped on top of the bench and started looking around. "Over here Esme." Will was sitting in the cell beside me, and Elizabeth was frowning at Beckett in the one next to Legolas'.
'Well, isn't this just a little cell block party!" I smiled and wen to talk to Will until Beckett cleared his throat. "Yes?"
"I would like to borrow you and master Will for a moment, can you spare it?" I stared at him like he had ten heads.
"No I'm sorry, you seemed to have caught me at a bad time. I was going to sit in the dark and do nothing. You'll have to come back later." I shook my head and turned back to Will, Beckett grabbed my hand and jerked me out of my cell right as another sentry grabbed Will.
'Nice job Esme. Make him angry, just what we need." I smiled at Will and started to skip until Beckett turned and glared at me.
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When we reached his office it's like he was a different person, he settled behind this huge desk and could barely see over the top. I bet he was sitting on some very thick books to even be that high. Will just told me to shut up. Right happy ol'chap.
"Those won't be necessary." He pointed to our shackles and the soldier took them off.
"I have one question."
"Esme, shut up."
"NO you shut up Will! I'm trying to ask a question!"
"You'll get us in trouble."
"You don't know that!"
'QUITE!" We turned startled to see Beckett breathing heavy and glaring. "Both of you shut up. And no! You can't ask your question!" I poked my lip out and Will smirked at me, so I hit him in the knee. "As I was saying, the East India Trading Company has need of your services. " He made to hand us both drinks, I just stared at mine until he sat it down Will didn't even pay it any head."We wish for you to act as our agent in a business transaction with our mutual friend - Captain Sparrow. "
"More acquaintance than friend. How do you know him? " Will sat eying Beckett while I was eying the gold chest behind him.
"I would realize if you took that Esme." Damn, caught in the act. " We've had dealings in the past. " He picked up the brand that I had become accustomed to on out last confrontation. Beckett smirked at me when I grabbed my wrist and hid it behind my back, Will just stared at me funny. "And we've each left our mark on the other"
"Oh yeah? What did he do to you I wonder?" I snarled knocking the thing out of his hand, he just raised his eyebrow, I resisted the urge to spit at him.
"Calm down Esme." I glared at Will before crossing my arms and gesturing for Beckett to continue.
"By your efforts, Jack Sparrow was set free. I would like you to go to him and recover a certain property in his possession." He bent over to pick up the brand and I had an urge to kick him into the fire, but Will knew what I was thinking and but a hand on my shoulder to tell me to wait.
"And why should we do that?" I snarled shaking Will's shoulder off. "Couldn't you just do what you did to us and get it?" Beckett continued to smile his obnoxious smile. 'You want us to kill him don't you, you foul piece of -"
"Esme! Calm down for Eru's sake. Do you mean by the point of a sword?" Will was shaking his head and glaring at me, I shrugged we could just kill this man know and be done with it.
"Bargain. Letters of Marque. You will offer what amounts to a full pardon - Jack will be free, a privateer in the employ of England. " He waved them in my face, I just stared at him like he was dumb.
"I'm a pirate, I steal things of value, not paper." He shrugged and moved on to Will.
"Somehow I doubt Jack will consider employment the same as being free. "
"Freedom. Jack Sparrow and our dear Esmeralda are a dying breed." I started to follow behind him and mock him, every time he would turn around I would act like I was admiring one of his fancy pieces of art. I could tell it was really irritating that he couldn't catch me. "The world is shrinking. The blank edges of the map filled in. They must find their place in the New World or perish. Not unlike you, Mr. Turner. You and your fiancée face the hangman's noose. " At that I acted like I was hanging myself and Will let out a chuckle and tried to hastily cover it with a cough, Beckett whirled around seething and I placed my hand under my chin as if I was thinking, I smiled when I acted like I caught sight of him.
"So you get both Jack and the Black Pearl."
"The Black Pearl?" I glared at Beckett when I heard him say the same thing I did. How dare he.
"The property you want that he possesses." Eru Will could be an idiot at times. Every one knows what Beckett's after, it's not that hard to figure out.
"A ship? Hardly. The item in question is considerably smaller and far more valuable. Something Sparrow keeps on his person at all times: a compass? " Will made and oh of understanding, and I just rolled my eyes. Land people. "Ah, you know it. Bring back that compass, or there's no deal." He turned to back away but I had him in a headlock in no time, he just started to laugh.
'What if I just killed you know? There would be no need for any of this really?"
'You wouldn't want to do that."
"Oh, I think I would."
"Well, then you and the others would be on the run from the law forever.
"That's it? I'm already always on the run from the law, no problems."
'Don't. Elizabeth will still be killed if you kill him now." Beckett was turning a nasty purple color, but I still hadn't released him.
'Oh that's right. She can't fend for herself, I forgot." I released Beckett who took to gasping for breathe while I patted his wig back down. "Good day Beckett.'
'It's Lord now!" he rasped massaging his neck, I just smiled and waved.
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"You're too rash." Will snarled as we ran back to the prisoners.
'And you're too slow! Like your girlfriend quite actually. Only difference, you know how to fight and she doesn't. We could be running free right now, but no. Because of your no good fiancée we still have to deal with that stupid Beckett." Will stopped and glared at me.
"She is not weak. How do you know it wouldn't be Legolas that kept us back?" I started to laugh.
'Because, he would know how to fight off the guards who came after him, you would have to deal with the ones after her and you, and then I would have to step in and then Legolas would have to step in, and we'd never get away." I patted him on the shoulder and entered the jail. I could hear him mumble about her being strong,I rolled my eyes and walked over to Legolas' cell.
"You're not... you can't be here. " I just raised my eyebrows at the soldier, and walked around he tried to get in front of my again but the governor stopped him.
"Mani marte?" (what happened) I smiled at Legolas and stuck my hand through the cell, he grabbed it and kissed it.
"I'm now in the service of Lord Cutler Beckett, thanks to sir William over there." Will sent a furtive glare when he heard my name. Legolas was staring at me with his mouth open, yes the reaction I knew was coming.
"Mankoi?" (Why?)
"He wants Jack's compass." Legolas raised an eyebrow. "It leads to something very important." I whispered so only Legolas could heard, he nodded and looked at Will and Elizabeth who were staring in our direction.
"Iire lle auta?" (When do you leave?) I smiled at him, I really don't want to cry right now.
"Ale' lye tela sinome" (When we finish here.) He smiled and stroked my face.
"Amin mela lle" (I love you.)
" Amin mela lle ner." (I love you more.) He smiled and looked over my shoulder, Will was waiting, looking determinedly away from the governor and Elizabeth; I shrugged and kissed Legolas' hand before standing to leave.
"Where is our first heading Esme?' I started and turned to look at him.
"Why ask my advice now?" I crossed my arms and pretended to preen my fingernails.
"Because your a pirate and you know where he would go. And I need your help." I smiled at that and whistled. Will looked at me like I was an idiot and I just smiled. At that moment Edward came riding from around a corner with my horse, Wheat Thins, and a horse for Will. Will looked at me like I was a miracle worker.
"How did they know you were here?"
'They saw me be captured and thrown on an East India Trading Company ship and followed us by night to get here." I grabbed my reigns and jumped on before turning to Edward.
"Where to Captain?'
"Where else, Tortuga."
Author's Note: So tell me what you think for a first chapter, and whether I should continue or not? I'm home sick so that's why I got to start the sequel so early. Just let me know what you think!