A/N- Hey pilot, I mean, readers! How ya doin'? (Zim will liquefy your organs if you don't get that joke. :D)
So...what's an Avatar: The Last Airbender writer doing here? Well, I got this idea after watching all the episodes of Invader Zim OBSESSIVELY and reading fanfics OBSESSIVELY. Might suck, might become a work of LITERARY GENIUS (LOL JK)…but, I'm just kinda going with the flow. I feel compelled by the Mighty Zim to write this so uh…to prevent being destroyed, I'm gonna write the story. Hope you like it! 8DDD
Disclaimer- …Really? Do you really think I own anything? I'm the kind of person who causes JV to go insane with their totally-not-part-of-his-vision-for-Invader-Zim fanfiction. :D
Chapter One- It Ends Now
It was a clear day on Earth, not a cloud ruining the blue expanse of sky curving over the surface of the planet.
A perfect day for Zim to destroy the Earth…, Dib thought as he watched said alien strut up to the doors of Skool through narrowed eyes. He had a right to be suspicious, given that Zim had a large, self-assured grin on his face, practically glowing with pride. Determined fists formed at Dib's sides.
Whatever that alien scum is planning, I'm going to make sure he doesn't get away with it, he vowed mentally, though he must have said it out loud (he had a habit of doing that) because Gaz, dark-clothed and as absorbed in her Game Slave as ever, growled, "Be quiet, Dib! You're annoying voice is interfering with my concentration."
Dib ignored his sister's comment, continuing to keep a careful eye on Zim. The determination was filling him now, like lava rises into the stone veins of a volcano.
"Look at him, Gaz," he muttered, oblivious to enraged growls his sister was emitting from behind as she was increasingly angered by his inability to shut up, "He's up to something. I don't know what it is, but it's up to me to find out an-YAAHHGG!"
Dib's face was met by the harsh sidewalk and he gingerly picked himself off the ground, rubbing the small of his back where Gaz had kicked him with incredible force for a girl in the sixth grade. He frowned at her retreating form, adjusting his glasses that had been knocked slightly askew, indignant he'd been so rudely interrupted. He could hear Gaz grumbling about something as she made her way to Skool's entrance along the lines of "annoying brother" and "stupid voice".
Eventually, Dib dusted off his trench coat and shuffled towards the green double doors that led into his least favorite place on Earth. It was bad enough his father and sister didn't believe him about any of his paranormal findings, but his whole class thought he was crazy AND a freak. They'd all be sorry in the end though, when he finally proved Zim was an alien. He'd be a hero, and no one would mock him then. Gaz and dad would be shocked and awed that he'd been right all along. He'd become famous! Surely the city would nominate him for the Nobel Peace prize. Was there even a category for saving the Earth from evil aliens?
Dib smirked to himself.
Perhaps that day would be today. He had to stay optimistic; if he gave in to defeat now, he'd certainly be defeated in the end.
His shuffling walk transformed into a confident stride, ready to face anything Zim hurled his way.
~****~
"And so, if you ever spontaneously combust, it's because our society is headed straight for impending DOOM!" Ms. Bitters lectured, putting unnecessary emphasis on the 'DOOM' part.
All the kids in the front row flinched, pressing their backs flat against their chairs except Zim who was too busy doodling to notice and Dib who was concentrating only on what thoughts ran through his head to hear. Ms. Bitters saw this, emitting a venomous hiss of disapproval, and slithered over to Zim, who was feverishly moving his pencil over his paper, grinning maliciously to himself.
"Zim! Are you paying attention?" she growled, towering above him with her spine curved so her neck was craned menacingly over him, resembling a vulture with glasses and a snowy bun tightly wrapped atop its head.
"Yes, yes. Exploding Earth-monkeys and doom," he replied absently, never taking his eyes off his paper.
This seemed to satisfy Ms. Bitters who materialized in front of Dib next.
"Dib! Care to repeat what I just said?" she spat. It wasn't a question; hardly anything Ms. Bitters said was.
The boy jumped when his pensive state was shattered and he looked up at his scowling teacher, insides curling and clenching when he remembered he hadn't been paying attention to most of the lesson. He'd been too busy wondering what Zim was up to and how to stop him.
"Uh…" He faltered.
Ms. Bitters's eyes, which had been narrowed at him before, shrunk to slits, burning into his face with intensity so great it almost caused him physical pain.
"DETENTION!" she shrieked, slinking back over to her desk leaving Dib to take in the news.
Detention? No, that couldn't be right! He had a plan! How was he going to stop Zim if he was stuck here after Skool was over?
He glanced over at Zim to find he was throwing a smug look his way, gloved hands twirling his pencil in a small gesture of victory. Anger filled Dib, but also a sense of hopelessness. Whatever this great plan of his was could end up destroying the Earth if he wasn't there to stop it--even if Zim was an idiot. After all, the Irken's incompetence was only to an extent. The invader may have stood a chance at wiping out the human race before if he'd lowered his pride and thought things through more carefully in the past.
He turned back to Ms. Bitters who was settling herself in her seat behind her desk.
"Ms. Bitters! I-I can't have a detention! I've never had one in my life and I have things to do after Skool!" he stammered, but Ms. Bitters interrupted.
"SILENCE! No arguments, Dib!" she snapped.
"But…"
Ms. Bitters hissed at him and the words died in his throat before they could reach his tongue. He slid down in his seat, defeated and disheartened, wondering how he was going to save mankind this time.
He looked around helplessly at all the students who might very well be facing their doom soon, only to see they were all stifling snickers behind their hands.
"Sometimes I wonder why I even care…"he muttered under his breath to himself, reluctantly tuning in to what Ms. Bitters was saying.
~****~
When the bell rang forty agonizingly-long minutes later, Dib remained in his seat while the rest of the class rushed to the door, bursting into the hallway with screeches of joy. Zim, however, lagged behind and took a detour over to Dib's desk. The Irken had his hands clasped behind him, chest sticking out in that prideful way of his. Magenta eyes, covered with violet-iris contacts, narrowed as he smirked at the human.
Dib's hands, which were resting on the edge of the desk facing him, clutched tighter at the pressed wood in fury until his knuckles and nail beds burned white.
"You won't get away with it Zim!" he hissed through clenched teeth, amber eyes glaring hatefully at the green boy.
Zim just laughed loudly at this, moving his arms to cross over his chest.
"Foolish human! I'm already getting away with it," he stated, grinning so his zipper-tooth smile was on full display.
"AH HA! You admit it! You are plotting something!" Dib cried, rising from his seat so he was level with the green boy and pointing an accusing finger in his face. He waited for the fear or annoyance of being discovered to slip into the Irken's expression, but he was sorely disappointed as Zim went on grinning. He swatted Dib's hand away dismissively, far too pleased with himself to care about whatever Dib had to say on the matter.
"Yes, and I must say I've truly outdone myself this time. And with you here in this…detention…I will be free to destroy the Earth without interference. Your pi-ti-ful planet will soon face the wrath of ZIM!" he shouted as he clenched his gloved hands into fists and raised them above his head, leaping onto Dib's desk. His words dissolved into maniacal laughter.
When he finally calmed down, his laughter reduced to a smug smirk, he stepped down to the ground and strutted towards the door, turning to give Dib one last evil grin. "Have fun in detention, Dib-worm."
Dib growled angrily, and grudgingly plopped back into his chair. He knew now that there was no way he could just sit here and let that meddlesome annihilate the Earth. He had to get out of here, and fast.
I've got to do it so I don't get in trouble though; can't afford another detention…he thought to himself, frowning thoughtfully, and then grinning when an idea came to him. All he had to do was get to his locker.
"Alright, Dib," Ms. Bitters said in her rough, gravelly voice as she reentered the room (Dib didn't even realize she'd left), putting a distasteful inflection on his name, "Sit there for an hour doing nothing until your brain melts inside your enormous head."
There was a twinge of annoyance at the insult, but Dib shook it off and raised his hand instead. He watched as Ms. Bitters raised a thin eyebrow and barked, "What, Dib?"
"Can I go to the bathroom? My intestines feel like they're going to explode," he asked, clutching at his abdomen, doubling over in fake agony.
"No."
"But it was mayonnaise and corn day in the cafeteria!" (It really was too easy to lie about intestinal problems with food like that.)
Ms. Bitters seemed to consider this for a minute, probably imagining what would happen if she just let his organs burst inside him, before she waved her hand, signaling he could go.
"Make it quick, though!" she shouted at his back as he bolted from the room.
Of course, Dib didn't have any intention to actually stop at the bathroom. He ran straight for his locker, twirling in the combination, 12-24-22. He pushed up on the button above the dial and swung the door open so hard it slammed into the lockers juxtaposing it on the right side. Without having to think, he grabbed a handful of glossy black beads and his goggles with the cloaking technology from inside, stuffed them in his pocket, and made his way back to Ms. Bitters' room.
He stopped just outside the door.
Alright, Dib, time to test your acting skills…he thought to himself with a sigh as he dug his fingernail into one bead, making a small incision on the surface. Immediately, tendrils of grey smoke bloomed from the crack, filling the air around him. He took a moment to gather all the panic regarding to Zim's latest plan to destroy mankind together before ripping the door open, leaping inside, and shouting,
"AAGGHH!!! Ms. Bitters, it's worse than I thought! I'm going to spontaneously combust!"
Ms. Bitters, looking up from her task of grading papers, seemed vaguely interested by this instead of horrified, but he'd expected that much. There was an air of smugness about her too as she watched him flail around and wail in a convincing I'm-about-to-explode act.
"You see, Dib? You should have paid attention to today's lesson!" she growled in her shrill voice. She went back to grading the stack of papers on her desk. "Go explode outside. I don't want your guts staining my classroom. It smells bad enough in here already from the collective child stench."
Dib didn't have to be told twice, though he'd have some explaining to do when he showed up perfectly healthy at school the next day.
Once he was outside, he took three beads in his palm, including the already-smoking one, and threw them a good distance away where they detonated. As the smoke from the explosion rose into the atmosphere, acting as a screen, Dib slipped on the goggles and flicked on the cloaking device.
"Time to see what Zim's up to," he muttered to himself.
He had to remember that he didn't have to act stealthy; he was invisible, so no one could see him. Still, he snuck his way to Zim's crooked green house, sticking out awkwardly between the dull colors of the homes on either side of it. Cautiously, Dib approached the front walkway, guarded by three-foot wall-eyed gnomes. His cloaking device allowed him to slip past, but he could tell the gnomes had sensed a disturbance. One slip up and he'd be eating lasers for dinner.
Slowly, and oh, so carefully, he twisted the doorknob, which was open, thanks to GIR, and slipped inside.
The human wrenched the goggles off his face dramatically, allowing him to become visible again, and took a heroic stance as he yelled,
"PREPARE TO FACE DEFEAT, ALIEN SCUM!"
He was met with deafening silence.
Dib scanned the house, highly suspicious and alert, waiting for something, anything, to pop out and attack him…but nothing came. The computer made no attempts to shoot at him, throw him out or even say anything. Even GIR wasn't sitting in front of the large television or making waffles in the kitchen.
He listened to see if Zim's laugh would bubble up from the depths of his base, but the place was eerily and unnaturally quiet.
Of course, Dib didn't buy it; not for one second. He knew there was something horribly wrong here, and he was going to find out what.
He slipped into the kitchen, still on his toes and ready for anything, making his way over to the oddly-placed toilet against the opposite wall. The eyes of the strange-looking people on the posters around the room seemed to follow him as he edged closer. However, he reached his destination unharmed and unnoticed.
He looked down the pipe, eyes narrowed behind his thick glasses.
"It ends now, Zim," he said to no one in particular before jumping inside the bowl and plunging into the bowls of his enemy's headquarters.
A/N- WHOO! That was fun!
I feel so evil for leaving you all hanging. xDDDD WHERE IS ZIM!? :O
For those who were looking forward to reading this, mentioned in my author's note in my other story, Destructive Information, I really hope you weren't disappointed. I seriously do, because I hate disappointing my readers.
Comments are very much appreciated. I love feedback. :D
~Flassy