Hello! I don't know how many people actually read this but whatever. Get ready for angst and more angst! Don't you just love angst? And by angst I mean torturing my poor cinnamon roll and then making him happy in the end! ;) This is my Second Miraculous fanfic (my other one is on hiatus snd involves torturing Marinette (and my oneshot make a wish) Aren't I nice?)Hope you enjoy

Trigger Warnings for Self harm, Attempted suicide/ Suicidal thoughts, child abuse, depression, anorexia and bulimia

Disclaimer: I do not own Miraculous Ladybug. All rights belong to Zagtoon, Thomas Astruc and everybody else involved in making the show.

Perfect

Having all the required or desirable elements, qualities or characteristics; as good as it is possible to be.

Eccedentesiat

A person who hides their pain behind a smile

Athazagoraphobia

The fear of being forgotten, ignored or being replaced

Atelophobia

The fear of being imperfect or never being good enough.

The photographer stopped to observe the pictures and for a brief moment Adrien Agreste let the forced smile slip. He fidgeted nervously waiting for the photographer to either tell him he wasn't good enough or he was 'acceptable' and he could be dismissed. Eventually after what seemed like a bloody lifetime he was allowed to go. Sighing he got up and struggled to put the puzzle pieces of the smile back together. With his feet dragging along the ground and his head looking down at the ground he made his way towards his limousine where Gorilla waiting impatiently. It's just today, he reminded himself, you can do it. You have been for years. As he got into his ride he stared out of the window. He wasn't sure when but at sone point during the ride he became subconsciously aware that it was raining. He had never liked the rain. It meant that a thunderstorm might be coming and he had despised thunderstorms ever since he was little. The rain also reminded him of teardrops. It was almost like the rain had feelings to. He was deep in thought when they pulled up the front of his school. Pulling his hoodie up over his head he walked out of the car and practiced his best smile before finally entering the school.

When he opened the door to his classroom his teacher didn't even ask him where he had been. She didn't need to. He had been disappearing to more and more photoshoots as his busy schedule became more and more busy. He sat down in his seat trying to look like he actually had his shit together. It was easier said than done.

"Are you ok dude",Nino asked him while frowning in concern.

Adrien didn't have the strength to reply so he just pulled his smile wider and wider and gave his best friend a thumbs up. This seemed good enough for Nino because he turned his attention back to whatever Madame Bustier was saying. Adrien tugged his hoodie further down to his eyes and tried to listen as well while he was still keeping the smile plastered on to his face.

Marinette's pov

Marinette stared at the gorgeous blond that was sitting in front of her dreamily. She could feel a light blush creeping into her cheeks just by glancing at him. He was so…so perfect. His absolutely stunning hair and his big green eyes. She bet he looked like that when woke up. That black hoodie as well. Normally he wore T-shirts and jeans and although he looked cute in those he looked wildly handsome in the hoodie. Alya caught her starring in awe and nudged her friend in the ribs snickering a little bit.

"Starstruck aren't we",she whispered teasingly.

Marinette poked her tongue out in response and started day-dreaming about a wonderful future with Adrien and their children..

Back to Adrien's pov

Lunch had just started when he heard teachers telling everyone to evacuate because their was an akuma attack. Adrien wasted no time running into the nearest bathroom, checking it was empty and transforming.

Chat Noir dashed across Paris's rooftops. He felt a little bit better, more free but the pain was still there. It was just able to hold off until he detransformed. He landed in the park and practically fell on top of Ladybug.

"Good afternoon Bugaboo. I must say that you are looking pawsitivley delightful", he commented. Ladybug brushed him away with her hand and went back to focusing on the akuma.

The rest of the battle continued without a hitch. It was an easy akuma and they didn't even have to use a lucky charm. Just as he was about to leave Ladybug grabbed his wrist pulling him back.

"Patrol tonight,"she asked him.

He was tempted to say,"no I' drowning in homework can you take patrol tonight?" but the words that came out of his lips were,"of course my lady."

He dashed back school hoping that just this once his bad luck didn't kick in.Please, he begged no-one in particular, don't give my father another reason to beat me.

Please, please, please, please.

He burst into the room just as the teacher called out," Agreste ,Adrien."

"Here," he replied his breath coming out in short pants like a dog on a hot day as his heart thrust itself against his ribcage as though in a desperate attempt to escape.

"You ok bro?" Nino asked at the boy's trembling legs as he heard his best friends name get called out.

"Of course. I'm fine."

That was all he ever was. Fine.

Chapter 1 doooooone! Plz check out my other fics. I BEG OF YOU!

Dies anyone know any more info on season 2 cause im dyyyyyyying

Plz review, fav and follow. It makes my day

Gypsy