Okay, so this is my first official FanFic. It's not very good, but I tried. This is kinda like the Ishbal massacre, all the State Alchemists had to go out and eliminate this group of people who were planning a rebellion against the government. Even the kids were being trained, so even the kids had to be killed. Ed has never killed kids, or anyone, in cold blood before. It breaks him, thus the name. Warning: lots of angst. Words in italics are Ed thinking. 'words in italics and surrounded by apostrophes' are conscience voices things. Enjoy!

Oh, yeah, I almost forgot about this. Disclaimer: No, I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or any of the characters. Well, duh, of course I don't own it. Happy now?

Broken

Chapter One: Dinner Disaster

"So, do you and your brother want to come over for dinner at our house tonight?" asked Maes Hughes, nodding his head at the small blond boy that had his back to them. Edward was laying on his side on the couch in their room and he hadn't moved in over a half an hour. Alphonse shrugged his metal shoulders.

"No," grunted Ed, not even turning to look at them.

"But Nii-san, why not?" asked Al.

" 'cause I don't feel like it. I'm tired. Now go away." Al sighed and bobbed his metal helmet apologetically.

"I'm sorry, sir. My brother hasn't been himself since…" Al broke off, glancing over at Edward.

"I understand. But if you want to come over, I'm sure Gracia would welcome you both," said Hughes, bowing slightly as he backed towards the door.

"We'll be there, sir," said Al. Hughes chuckled slightly.

"Call me Maes, Alphonse." With a soft click, the door shut, leaving the Elric brothers alone. The silence stretched uncomfortably for a few moments before Al stalked over to where his brother was resting.

"Why were you so rude, Nii-san?" he asked, his hands on his hips. Ed didn't answer. "Answer me, brother! Why have you been acting so strange lately?" Ed curled up into a ball and shivered slightly.

"I don't want to talk."

"You never want to talk! You don't want to do anything anymore."

"Don't you have something better to do then pester me with questions?" asked Ed harshly. "Why won't you just leave me alone?" Al didn't answer, stung by his older brother's words.

"Do you really want me to go away?" he asked in a small, hurt voice. Ed paused.

"For a little while, Al. I just need to be alone. Please." Ed's tone had changed and it sounded as if he was on the verge of tears. Al walked over to the door and opened it quietly.

"I'll be back soon, Nii-san," he said softly as he stepped outside. With each clanking step he took, Al became more and more absorbed in his thoughts. Edward had been acting strange for at least the past week, maybe longer. He hardly ever talked to anyone anymore and almost never left their room. He only ate when Al brought him food and insisted that he eat. And as far as Al knew, Ed never slept anymore either. Suddenly Al felt something collide with the midriff of his armor. He looked down and saw Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye on the floor in front of him, a few papers and folders scattered around her.

"I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying attention—" began Al but Hawkeye shook her head. She stood up and smiled at Al.

"No apology needed," she said. "How is Edowasu-kun? I haven't seen him around lately." Al's pure white eyes flashed as he looked down at the floor.

"He's been up in our room. He doesn't talk to anyone. If you want to go try to talk to him, you can. He probably won't answer though." The yellow-haired Lieutenant bent down and gathered up her scattered papers.

"How long has he acted like this?" she asked when she straightened up again.

"Ever since…since…" Al couldn't finish the sentence. The Lieutenant's amber eyes darkened.

"Colonel Mustang hasn't been the same either. He isn't as sarcastic as normal," she said and smiled slightly. "Although, I don't know if that is a bad thing…"

Al walked back down the hall towards the room he shared with his brother, thinking he had given Ed enough time to be alone with his thoughts. He stopped before he opened the door. From inside he heard…what? It sounded like Ed was saying something, but not loud enough for him to hear. He opened the door just a crack and saw Ed huddled on the couch with his arms wrapped around his chest.

Al heard Ed an unintelligible phrase over and over again. His breath was coming in sobbing gasps. Al knocked lightly on the door to let his brother know he was there. Ed stopped whispering and covered his face with his arms.

"What do you want?" he asked, his voice muffled.

"Brother, it's me," said Al quietly. "What's wrong?" Ed wiped his eyes on his black sleeve and looked up at Al. His eerie golden eyes had dark shadows under them and they were full of tears.

"Nothing. Just a…just a bad dream," he said. Al could see in his eyes that he was lying.

"Brother, we should probably get ready to go to dinner," Al suggested softly.

"Ha, you mean I should get ready for dinner," said Ed. "What if I'm not hungry?"

"You're coming anyway." Al walked up to the still slightly tearful Edward and picked him up by the back collar of his shirt. He lifted Ed up off the couch and set him down on his feet.

"What did you do that for?" asked Ed indignantly. Al shrugged.

"We have to leave in ten minutes and I know that you wouldn't get up unless I forced you to." Al picked up Ed's long red cloak and tossed it to him. Ed blinked and looked down at the red cloak in his hands. Al crossed his metal arms across his empty chest and stood waiting. With a sigh, the blond alchemist slipped his arms into the sleeves of his cloak and let it settle across his shoulders.

"Are you happy now?" he demanded, glaring at his younger brother. Al nodded.

"Come on, we're going to be late," he said and walked out the door without a backwards glance at Edward. The small alchemist wiped the remaining tears from his eyes with his hand and followed Alphonse.

"Wonderful," said Edward dryly, looking up at the sky as a few drops of water hit the ground beside him. "It's raining." With a growl of disgust he pulled his hood up over his head. As the two brothers quickly trotted across a street, Ed tripped on an uneven spot on the road and fell face first into a puddle at the side of the road.

"Brother, are you—" began Al.

"Damn it!" exclaimed Ed, picking himself up. The front of his shirt and pants was soaked through. His hair was dripping and hung down in front of his face. The rain came down even harder, soaking the back of Ed's cloak and making him more rankled.

"Come on, let's go," snarled Ed, not even trying to brush the water out of his eyes. Al hesitated, then plodded after his older brother.

When they reached the Hughes' house, Ed banged angrily on the door. The door was opened by a smiling Gracia Hughes.

"Come in, you're soaking," she said, opening the door wider to let them both through.

"Really? I had no idea," growled Ed, peeling his dripping red cloak off. As soon as she shut the door, Gracia took the cloak from Ed's hands.

"Follow me, please." She lead them down a hall to the kitchen where she showed them where they could sit down. Ed flopped down into a chair and folded his arms on the table. Resting his chin on his folded arms, Ed closed his eyes. Gracia came back into the room, two towels in her arms.

"Gracia! Can you come here a minute?" called Maes Hughes' voice from another room.

"I'll be right back," said Gracia, setting the towels on the table and hurrying from the room. Al picked up one of the towels and held it out to his brother.

"Nii-san, you should dry off before you get sick," he said. Ed didn't move.

"You should dry off before you rust," he said, his eyes still closed. Al unfolded the towel and draped it across Edward's back and shoulders. Then he unfolded the second towel and started drying his armor off before it did rust. A few moments later, Gracia and Maes Hughes walked into the kitchen.

"Elysia is sleeping," said Maes. "But we'll start dinner now and giver her some food when she wakes up." Without waiting for an answer from the two brothers, he and Gracia went about setting dishes on the table. Gracia set some dishes of food on the table and asked, (do the Hughes' know that Al is empty??)

"Now, how hungry are you both?"

"I'm not that hungry," said Edward. Al laughed nervously and shrugged.

"I guess that I'm not very hungry either…"

"Well, that's more for us!" laughed Maes, sitting down at the table and motioning for Gracia to do the same. Gracia smiled. Maes scooped up some potatoes and dumped them on his plate.

"Well, aren't you going to eat?" he asked through a mouthful of potatoes and vegetables. Ed reached forward and picked up a small bread roll and took a bite out of it. Grudgingly he put more food on his plate and picked at it for a while. Occasionally he took a bite of food or a sip water, but not much. After shifting his food around on his plate for a few minutes, he looked down and to his surprise he saw that he had accidentally spelled out the word 'Nina' by moving his potatoes around. He hurriedly scraped his fork through it before anyone saw. Gracia looked up at the sound of his fork across his plate.

"Are you feeling well, Edward?" she asked. He shrugged and stared down at his plate. He felt the towel Al had draped across his shoulders slide of him and fall to the floor. Gracia continued to stare at him. Ed turned his head and let his deep golden bangs fall protectively in front of his eyes.

"You look cold," she said. "You cloak should be dry by now, if you want it. It's in the second room on the right side of the hall." Ed stood up, still not looking at her. He hated the look in her eyes. It reminded him of his mother. He wished she would look somewhere else.

"I'll be right back," he murmured as he left the room. He heard Al sigh in the kitchen as he walked down the hall. Second door on the right… Coming to the correct door, he pushed the door open. His now dry cloak was draped across a small wooden dresser against the opposite wall from the door.

"Why did Al make me come here anyway?" he grumbled. "I didn't even want to come…"

"Big brother, why are you here?" asked a sleepy voice from the doorway. Ed picked up his cloak and turned around. In the doorway stood little Elysia, a teddy bear under one arm. She rubbed her eyes with one small hand and blinked at him. Ed could feet his heart thudding painfully in his chest. An image flashed before his eyes. It was Nina, standing where Elysia should have been. Behind her was her huge, white, shaggy dog, Alexander. She had tears in her eyes and streaking down her innocent face. Then Nina and Alexander merged together and became the a creamy furred chimera with a shaggy overcoat of long brown hair that hung in front of it's confused and lost looking eyes.

"Bro-ther?" it asked in am echoing, halting voice that didn't sound like Nina at all. "Why didn't you—help me, big bro-ther?" Ed dropped to his knees and tried to cover his eyes with his hands but they wouldn't move.

"You didn't save me, bro-ther," whined the Nina-chimera. "I trust-ed you. But you didn't—save me. Why?"

"I'm sorry…" whispered Ed, tears filling his eyes. Then the chimera vanished and in it's place stood his brother. Or, how his brother should have been. A normal boy of thirteen.

"What's wrong, brother?" he asked. The would-be-Al's hand reached out to take hold of Ed's. Then he drew back.

"I said it wasn't a good idea," said the boy in a suddenly cold voice. "But you wouldn't believe me. And now look at me!" The young boy turned into the suit of armor that Ed was used to seeing now. "You said it would be all right! You told me not to be scared! I thought you knew what you were doing! I believed you and look where we ended up!" Then Elysia was back.

"What's wrong?" she asked, looking worried. "Why are you crying?" Ed found that tears were falling silently down his cheeks from his wide, horrified eyes. Now there was a young, black haired boy kneeling on the ground where Elysia should have been.

"I didn't do anything!" the boy cried. Not again…please no… thought Ed desperately. But then he saw a long, very familiar silver blade slash through the boy's stomach. The boy screamed and fell on his side, trying to curl around the open wound that was bleeding all over the ground beneath him. A young girl with curly red hair jumped over the dying boy with a knife in her hand.

"You killed him! You killed my brother, you cur! Die, dog of the Military!" she screamed at him. He watched in horror as the silver blade came up to block her clumsy attack. Then it plunged into her heart and she went limp, falling to the ground with a thud.

"Not again…please not again…I'm sorry…!" He saw a bloody ground littered with the bodies of children, some of them as young as five. Then his brother was back. He looked just like he had before they had tried to Transmute their mother.

"Brother, what are you doing?" he cried backing away, only to trip over the body of a small, brown haired boy. His eyes widened in fear when he saw the blank, staring eyes of the dead boy. Ed saw the silver blade hiss down through the air towards Al. The boy leapt aside.

"What are you doing?" he shouted again. The transmuted auto-mail blade hissed again and sliced Al across the chest. With a short scream Al fell limply across the brown haired child he had just tripped over.

"Daddy, big brother is scaring me!" a high, shrill voice cut through the images that were playing before Ed's eyes. He heard his heart pounding furiously in his ears. The gruesome scene before his eyes dissolved and he found himself still in the room where he had gone to get his cloak. Now he was pressed up against the wall beside the dresser, his cloak sprawled out on the floor. He was shaking and tears were still pouring from his eyes like the fountain of wine in Lior. Like the blood of the children… A hoarse sob escaped his throat. A small voice in his head said 'it's your fault…they're all dead because of you…you killed them…you're brother is as good as dead because of you…' Footsteps pounded in the hall outside the half open door. Ed looked down at his auto-mail arms and to his horror he saw that it really was transformed into the deadly blade that had killed the children. And it looked like it had just changed, too. Fading blue lightning hissed along it's edges and then disappeared. Shaking, blinded by tears, he clapped his hands together and made the blade shrink back into his arm again. He curled his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around his legs as he leaned his forehead against the sanded wood of the dresser in front of him.

"Edward! What happened?" He heard Maes calling to him, but he didn't answer. His bangs shielded his horrified, haunted eyes from the worried man and his wife. He took a deep, shuddering breath, then broke down into loud sobs.

"Edward…?" He felt a gentle hand on his shoulder but he tried to jerk away from it. 'it's your fault…you killed them…'

"Brother? What's wrong? What happened?" Ed looked up with a gasp when he heard his brother's frightened voice. He turned his head to find his brother, but he didn't see him.

"Al? Where are you?" he asked hoarsely. His wide, frightened eyes scanned the room desperately. Al has to be all right…I didn't do anything to him…not really…

"Alphonse, come here! He's calling for you!" said Gracia's voice. Ed saw the large suit of armor crouch down beside him.

"What is it, brother?" Ed tried to speak but only sobs found their way from his throat.

"I'm sorry…I'm sorry for what I did to you, Al…"

"What?"

"I didn't listen to you…I'm sorry…now you're stuck inside that armor…forgive me…" Ed buried his head in his arms. A frightened looking Elysia could be seen behind Al. She was clinging to her father's hand and still had her teddy bear. Her eyes were wide. Ed gasped and tried to draw back even farther away from her. I won't hurt her too…

"What are you talking about, Nii-san?"

"I killed them!" Ed shouted. "I killed all of them! They're all dead!" Elysia gasped and ducked behind her father.

"Honey, would you please take Elysia out of here?" asked Gracia, crouching down beside Al. Maes nodded and led Elysia out of the room.

"Edward, what's wrong? Who did you kill?" asked Gracia in a soothing voice.

"The—the children…"

"What children?"

"The Children of Rebellion…"

Well, how was that for a first try? I hope you liked it. I will be getting Chapter Two: Children of Rebellion, posted soon. R&R! pretty please? email me if you have any corrections about the content of the story.