All For A Kiss
A tear trickled down Zelgadis' cheek, as Amelia lay helpless and bleeding before him. He hesitated.
How did I get here? He thought. I . . .I only wanted to be. . .
. . .Normal. . .
Amelia wept freely, awaiting death from his outreached sword. Her eyes were wide, pupils contracted; her mouth was dry, tongue thick; on her face sweat mixed with blood to a light pink liquid. Nightmares became reality as he stood before her, her castle crumbling before and around her, members of the royal court and her very own father bleeding to death before the limitless power Zelgadis seemed to obtain. "Zelgadis-san. . ." she choked.
Zelgadis took a breath in. He couldn't stop his heart's quick beating, pulsing loudly in his ears. Why did I ever. . .
—Several days earlier—
"Dammit!" Zelgadis growled in exasperation. "Why won't it work?!"
In his hand he held a knife whose blade had shattered as it struck his wrist. The suicide attempt—one of many—had failed. Since he left everyone—Lina, Gourry, Amelia—he found himself in a deep, seething depression. Every morning, he would wake up with the urge to be able to close his eyes again and sleep forever. When he tried to end his life, he found that his stone skin prevented that which he wanted so much.
It prevented him from everything he longed to have—a normal life, contact with other humans, the chance to love. He could have nothing he wanted while he was trapped in that stone shell.
Why couldn't he snap out of it? The depression was getting worse by the day. If he was only human once again, he could join Amelia and. . .
Amelia. Always drifting back to Amelia.
He told himself it wasn't love, that there was nothing between them. She could never love a chimera, and he could never be tied down to the life of a prince.
The futility of his life made him wish to be able to end it once and for all.
"Oh my Zelgadis, are we having problems with our rock skin?" Xelloss had appeared behind Zelgadis in a corner of the secluded room that he had been occupying. The room was dark, desolate, furnished only by a bed and a few belongings thrown across the floor.
Zelgadis turned around, throwing the knife at the sound as he did. "Go to hell!"
The expression on Xelloss' face made Zelgadis sick to his stomach. Every part of him smiled, from his closed eyes to his lips to what seemed to be every part of his being. Zelgadis was a hard contrast to this, with dark eyes filled with melancholy and a scowl that could make a child weep at the sight of it.
The priest caught the knife out of the air still smiling from head to toe. "Tsk, tsk, you could cut someone throwing knives carelessly." He seemed to get pleasure from Zelgadis' anger. Xelloss let his eyes wander the empty room, grinning. "Oi, where's Amelia?"
Zelgadis shouted as his temper flared. "None of your goddamn business!" He rose to his feet. "What do you want, mazoku?"
The purple haired mazoku's smile faded from his face as one eye opened in curiosity. "I'm here to restore you to human form. . ."
Zelgadis eyed him carefully. "And? What's the catch?"
"Rest assured that your power will remain. You will be able to cast the same spells, utilize the same sword techniques—"
"I asked what the catch was," Zelgadis repeated. "What do I have to give you, my eternal soul?"
The fact that Zelgadis was being sarcastic hadn't escaped Xelloss, he smiled at the remark. "But of course!"
Zelgadis was silent for a moment, then broke out into a hideous laughter tainted with sadness. "What, you want my soul in return for being human?"
"Human?" echoed Xelloss. "Why, I only said human form."
The laughter continued. "Then it still stands the same, doesn't it? I look human in return for eternal service to the boogey man? HA!" The cackling went on for several more moments.
"Oh so you're telling me you would give up chance to love, to let down you hood and be around other humans," Xelloss said in a serious tone. "Looking human is all you ever need to achieve your desires." He extended his index finger into the air. "Such as love for Amelia."
"What the hell are you babbling about?" Zelgadis said.
Xelloss continued as if nothing was said. "Think how it would be to be able to kiss her and not have to worry about stone lips that could hurt her. Or being able to hug her and not have to worry about bruising her. To be able to be seen in public with her without disguising yourself. Or possibly, to express deeper physical love with her someday and not worry about certain physical complications."
Zelgadis was left speechless. Was he that easy to read? After a long pause, he said in a soft whisper, "How would I become a monster? A pledge stone? Or would you take my soul away?"
The priest grinned to himself. He was starting to capture Zelgadis' attention. "Why no, I wouldn't steal your soul. Souls can't be stolen." Xelloss extended his hand in front of him as a purple pledge stone appeared. "Just touch this rock and repeat what I say and all your desires will be within your grasp. Now, before the stone expires."
Zelgadis hesitated for a moment, then reached a cerulean hand out and touched the stone with his fingertips.
Xelloss began. "I pledge my being to the mazoku race. To serve and obey under me."
"I pledge my being to the mazoku race. To serve and obey under you."
"With this stone I bind my essence with the souls of the demons."
"With this stone I bind my essence with the souls of the demons," Zelgadis echoed back.
"A contract everlasting."
"A contract everlasting." As the last words escaped his lips, Zelgadis could feel a strange energy from his body. He looked down at his hand, which felt like it was on fire, cerulean no more—now it had changed into a delicate peach. The fire turned to pain, and the pain shot through his entire body. He stumbled back and clutched his arms to his chest. The feeling of his clothing upon his skin changed. They felt cooler, with more texture, as the pain returned to burning, then left completely as quickly as it came.
He stood still for a moment, as if waiting for something else to happen, then upon realizing that the process was complete he stood tall. He examined his arms, both were peach, then pinched his skin. "Itaa!" he yelped. "That hurt. That. . .hurt!" In a flurry of emotion, he ran over to his sword, unsheathed it, and ran his finger lightly across it. It bled crimson. "It hurts. I feel pain. I'm bleeding! I'm bleeding!" Contrary to the context of his speech, his tone was joyous. It almost sent him to tears. "I'm human again!" He laughed in ecstatic happiness.
With a flick of the wrist, Xelloss removed the stone from all human eyesight. With a grin, he said, "I'll come back when I need you. Use your time wisely." With that, he disappeared.
Zelgadis stared blankly where Xelloss had been. Despite his natural instincts, he wished he could hug the mazoku for the blessing he had given. He had many things to do. . .
Several days later, he found himself in Seiruun's castle. His persistence in nagging the guards to let him see her was the only thing that made them check his identity. After a long quarrel through the chain of command, he finally managed to get a hold of someone who recognized his face, and he was allowed to proceed through the gates of the castle. Zelgadis found it quite irritating that anyone could possibly forget his face, but then again, he no longer looked like he used to.
His mind raced with thoughts as he ventured the palace grounds in search for her. So much to say, so much to do! He wanted to hold her, kiss her, tell her how much he loved her. But a move made too quickly and he would blow the whole thing. No, to move slow would be a better start.
Then, there she was, dressed in a beautiful princess gown, a jeweled necklace on her neck illuminating her same colored eyes. He had not been here in years, and she had grown quite a bit in that time. Her aura of boundless energy seemed to cool down into a more focused disposition, her face had matured from the childish one he had known, and she had grown several inches in height. Her hair was still cropped short, but one other thing remained the same—she was beautiful.
He approached her slowly, carefully, then called out her name. "Amelia. . ?"
She turned to the sound of his familiar voice with a bright grin. "Zelgadis-san?!" The grin faded as confusion swept in. "Is. . .that you?"
He smiled. "Yes, it's me. I've changed. I'm normal again. Look at me! I can finally be human again, with other humans, and. . ." He paused. Suddenly, he felt as if his tongue was tied into knots.
She stepped over to him gracefully and inspected him closely. "It is you. Zelgadis, I don't know how you did it, but I'm happy for you. It's what you've always wanted, isn't it? So I'm happy for you."
His spirit was brought down slightly by her reaction, but his smile remained just the same. "Yes, it is something I have longed for. But it's not everything. Amelia, I—"
From the sky, Xelloss made an appearance. "Zelgadis, I have a job for you. Come with me." He disappeared in the same way he came.
Amelia's inquisitive stare sent Zelgadis' stomach into knots. "I'll. . .I'll explain later." He bowed to her, walked several steps away, then vanished from sight.
She was left standing alone, eyes wide and mouth gaping. "Zelgadis-san, did you. . ?"
In the heart of Wolf Pack Island, Xelloss and Zelgadis faced each other in a soft, velvet dark room.
"It has come to the attention of the mazoku race that the destruction of Seiruun must be carried out immediately." The priest/general of Zelas said.
"Seiruun?" he echoed. "Why Seiruun?"
"The Holy Kingdom's white magic abundance poses as a threat to us." Xelloss explained.
"I can't do that!" pleaded Zelgadis. "I can't destroy everything Amelia lives on and believes in!"
Xelloss eyed Zelgadis for a moment. "Remember your place!"
Zelgadis, who knew he had overstepped his boundaries, closed his mouth. After a pause, he said quietly, "I will request one thing, then no more: let me let her live."
The priest smirked as Zelgadis' request. "Go to Amelia, tell her how you became what you are, and how you feel, only then will I consider your request."
Zelgadis, who resented having to take orders like this and was beginning to question his decision, was grateful anyway for the chance he had to save her. He nodded and was on his way.
It was dusk before he had the courage to talk to her again. He appeared before her as she was studying in her room. She seemed frightened of him and this disturbed him greatly.
"Amelia?"
She took a breath in before answering. "Zelgadis-san, what were you doing with the mazoku?"
He was taken aback at her words. Of all the things he wanted to tell her, this was the last of them. He had hoped he could admit his feelings before discussing it. However, he always knew her to be blunt and abrupt, and respected her wishes. "I wanted to be human again so badly. I was tired of life, and—"
"And you made a deal with a MAZOKU!" she snapped. The way it cut into Zelgadis, she may as well have slapped him while she was at it. "Didn't you?! I can feel it's evil inside of you! How COULD you, Zelgadis! I liked you the way you were!"
He scowled. "And you hate me now."
She turned away to hide her oncoming tears. "I cannot hate you, Zelgadis. You can never hate a whole person. I hate what you have done, and what you now represent. In essence, Zelgadis, you have become my enemy."
In the rage fed to him by the steam of the mazoku being, he took her arm and whisked her around. Her flooding of tears was the only thing that made him let go. He stepped back and inspected where he had held her, which was completely black and blue. His breathing became labored as he fought off panic and confusion. With nowhere to turn to, he fled from the scene, back to Wolf Pack Island.
"Koniiiichiiiiwaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!" rang Lina as she burst into Amelia's room. "It's been so long! What have you been—" She stopped when Amelia jumped into her arms, which was quite a feat now that Lina was the smaller of the two. Lina wanted to shout 'Get your breasts out of my face', but instead hugged the girl. "What's wrong, Amelia?"
Amelia, between sobs, told Lina what happened. The story blinded Lina into a speechless rage. As much as she wanted to comfort her, all she could do from smashing the next thing she saw into dust was to leave the room. Amelia sobbed in her solitude.
"XELLOSS!!!" shouted Zelgadis.
Xelloss appeared before him.
"I've lost her," Zelgadis said in a hoarse whisper. "No. . .did I even have her to begin with?"
Xelloss walked upside Zelgadis and placed a hand upon his shoulder. "Your mazoku brethren will never leave you. Amelia hates you, she has always hated you. How could she ever care for a self pitying pessimistic chimera? I wished for you to realize this. Even now in spite that you possess a human form, she still and always will look down upon you. Tell me, what good is it to protect someone that only wishes to have never been? Destroy those that hate you! Destroy those who have never cared!"
Zelgadis thought over Xelloss' words for quite a while. "Seiruun must die."
Xelloss turned on his heel and walked away.
—Present Time—
Explosions sounded from various parts of the castle as towers crumbled and collapsed. Screams from women and children were enough to deafen the ears. The former chimera made his march through the Seiruun castle, demolishing anything and everything he saw. The powers of the holy priests and priestesses were not enough to stop his rampage. He made his way to the throne room, where the royal court and family were assembled. Philionel was struck away by the mazoku like a horse would swat away a fly. Before Zelgadis' hand, every person in the castle lay critically wounded and most were bleeding to death.
He had no one left to face except the princess, Amelia. With a callous heart, he unsheathed his sword and fought her hand-to-hand with little difficulty. He intended to spare no one from his wrath, Amelia included. He raised his sword and prepared to strike when a tear trickled down Zelgadis' cheek. Amelia lay helpless and bleeding before him. He hesitated.
How did I get here? He thought. I . . .I only wanted to be. . .Normal. . .
Amelia wept freely, awaiting death from his outreached sword. Her eyes were wide, pupils contracted; her mouth was dry, tongue thick; on her face sweat mixed with blood to a light pink liquid. "Zelgadis-san. . ." she choked.
Zelgadis took a breath in. He couldn't stop his heart's quick beating, pulsing loudly in his ears. Why did I ever. . .
He dropped his sword to his side. "I can't do this. I can't bring myself to give you this much pain." Metal clanked against the tile flooring as he dropped his sword. He cupped his hands and cast a spell, one forbidden to use on humans but one that could be manipulated to serve his purpose. The gashes of those around him healed. He fell to his knees before Amelia.
"Zelgadis?!" she said in alarm, and caught him before he hit the ground.
"They're sure to destroy me now," he said meekly. "I was supposed to destroy all of you. I disobeyed their orders, and even healed a human. Xelloss. . .will most surely kill me. But it was worth it, not bringing any more pain to you. . .I love you, Amelia, that's why I wanted to look human again so badly. I wanted to be able to be by your side without my hood and mask, to become a prince for you and live my life with you. I thought if I became a mazoku, and regained this form, it would be okay. But it wasn't. I. . ."
He fainted.
"I love you too, Zelgadis," Amelia said to deaf ears.
Xelloss appeared before the fallen Zelgadis and the pained Amelia. Amelia could find no words as she glared at the demon. The amused priest walked up to the princess and with ease shoved her away. He grabbed Zelgadis by the foot holding him upside down. "Tsk, tsk Zelgadis." Xelloss disappeared.
"XELLOSS!!!"
This time, it was Lina who shouted his name.
"Xelloss, I know you can hear me! Show yourself!!!"
Xelloss popped up behind Lina grinning from ear to ear. "Oh Lina-san, what brings you to my humble home?"
She took him by the collar and pulled him close to growl in his face. "Don't you give me that crap! What the hell kinda stunt did you pull on Zelgadis?!"
"Ita-ta-ta-ta!" The priest tilted his head. "Stunt?"
"You know what I mean, you double-talking no-good trickster!"
"Oh my, you mean Zelgadis and his pledge?" His face was blank, innocent, with both eyes open and curious.
She began to shake him violently. "YES!"
Xelloss extended his hand out in the air to his side as Zelgadis appeared hanging upside down by his foot in Xelloss' hand. "Oh my, you want this brain-fried chimera back?"
The hold loosened just enough for her to inspect Zelgadis. It was quite a sight to see him human-looking. She turned back to him. "Yes, and if you don't give him back to me with the pledge stone in the next fifteen seconds I'll giga slave your ass back to the Sea of Chaos!"
Xelloss dropped Zelgadis on the ground and in it's place appeared his pledge stone. He leaned into Lina's face. "Oh but there's one condition to getting the stone from me. . ." Xelloss placed a mischievous grin on his face. "A kiss."
First her cheeks went red, then her ears, then it seemed like her entire body was blushing. She weighed the two ends of the situation—on the one hand, she would get Zelgadis back to Amelia. On the other, she had to kiss him. Swallowing her pride, she closed her eyes to pretend that she was not there, threw her arms around him and kissed him. Xelloss opened one eye and gazed upon her face as he broke the kiss.
She was completely silent in humiliation. She held out her hand and commanded, "Stone."
The priest placed the stone in her hand. "I'm not completely callous you know. I know what it's like to be a mazoku and love a human." He winked at her and vanished.
For several long moments, Lina stared blankly into the air where Xellos had previously been. She kicked Zelgadis awake. He stirred, looked at Lina's expression, and decided words were not a good idea right now. Upon sight of the pledge stone which Lina held out before him, he took it, dropped it, and smashed it under his heel. The burning-pain-burning feeling returned, then he found himself a chimera once again.
They had a very silent trip back home.
"Is this what you really want?" Lina asked Zelgadis as he prepared to leave.
"Yes," he said plainly. "I can't go back, not now. Not yet."
Lina looked at him sadly. "She loves you, you know."
"I know."
"Then why-"
"Because I cant!" he snapped, interrupting her before she could finish. "I. . .I need time to figure things out. I know now that my appearance doesn't matter, but there are deeper things I need to work out, and I need to do it alone." He paused for a moment. "Could you do me a favor?"
"Yes," she said solemnly.
"Tell her that I won't be long, then I will come for her. Could you tell her that for me?"
"Of course, Zel. Anytime."
"Thanks." He threw his backpack over his shoulder and walked off.
Amelia smiled at the message Lina brought. "Thank you. Lina-san?"
"Yes?" Lina answered.
"How did you manage to find him anyway?"
Lina grinned. "Never doubt the Inverse Information Network!"
Amelia looked at her flatly. "Did you shake down some bandits?"
Lina beamed with pride.
"One more thing, Lina-san," Amelia continued on. "What did you have to do to get the stone back?"
Lina blushed as she thought of it. ". . .FIRE BALL!!!"
Amelia screamed as she flew out the window. Lina did not want to be reminded of that.