AUTHOR: Ragna (WritingGoddess@aol.com; SpikeGrrl1@aol.com)
RATING: PG
CLASSIFICATION: No pairings as of yet...
SUMMARY: Spike gets kidnapped to LA to change Kate and Lindsey's attitudes and get them to move on with their lives.
SPOILERS: Set closely after end of Buffy S5/Angel S2.
DISTRIBUTION: Any sites with my fic up; you all have unspoken permission. I write it, you can post it. Everyone else just keep my name on it and let me know.
PREVIOUS PARTS/ARCHIVED AT: http://www.envy.nu/allthepain/index.html
DISCLAIMER: If you don't recognize it, chances are it's my own creation. If you do, Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Kazui Sandollar, FOX and the WB own it or them. Various friends of mine are holding characters hostage. You may see them by appointment only.
FEEDBACK: Sorry I'm not home right now I'm walking in the spiderwebs so leave a message and I'll call you back...in other words, I want it. Don't care if it's onlist or not, but I prefer offlist since I have quite a few lists on No Mail.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Answer to Challenge #236 at YGTS? (Collie, don't post this until it's finished).
~*~*~
"Did Nancy boy run out of his precious hair gel?"
"Wesley, I'm telling you, if he doesn't shut up..."
"You'll do what, wanker?"
"William, do stop that."
"Stop what?"
"Being annoying, shithead."
"You're letting the little boy stand up to me, you English freak? I'm surprised."
The car pulled over and Wesley shut the engine off. "Gunn, would you please do me a favor?"
"Yeah?" Gunn answered.
"Could you find some way to get into that vampire body bag and stuff a gag into the pissant's mouth? We have a while to go until we get to Los Angeles, and I think everyone involved would prefer Spike didn't meet his end with a stake wielded by me."
"You, ponce? When'd you get some stones?"
"Gunn..." Wesley said, his patience teetering on the line between lost and ever-so-slighlty there.
"My pleasure," Gunn said, reaching over the front seat and opening the bag, letting some sunlight hit Spike.
"Bugger! That hurts!"
Gunn pulled a bottle out from the back seat and handed it to Spike. "Shut the fuck up."
"What is it?" Spike muttered.
"Tequila."
"Now we're talking..."
***
"Mary hash a wittle lambchop, fleesh ash white ash snow," Spike sang at the top of his lungs as he was hurried into the Hyperion. "And everywhere that Buffer went, the lampchop wash sure to go...hell too. You know hell ish hot, right mate?" he added, throwing his arm around Gunn's shoulder.
"Angel, it was the only way," Wesley said, looking at his former boss and current employee. "I wish you'd warned us what kind of drunk he'd be."
Angel ignored Wesley and took a good, long hard look at his childe. Something was different. And from the drunken rhyme, he knew what it was.
He had fallen for Buffy.
He'd been devastated when she died.
And now, he just didn't care.
"This just gets better and better," Angel muttered, shaking his head. "Gunn, go take him up to the room, hit him on the head and throw him in a cold shower. Remember to take the jacket off first."
"Why hit him?"
"Well, you want to keep your hand when you take that jacket off, right?"
"Good point." Gunn led the less vocal Spike up the stairs.
"Wesley, are you sure..."
"Not anymore. He seems more devastated than you did."
Angel nodded. "We need his help. I just hope he gives enough of a damn to do what Lorne said he had to do."
***
"What the bloody hell?!?"
Cordelia looked up from the desk, glancing at Fred and Wesley. "Apparently, he arises."
Spike stalked down the stairs, water dripping off into small puddles on the floor. "I'm bloody wet, and I'm frickin cold. Tell me why."
"You were drunk," Cordelia said.
"No shit, Sherlock. Whipping boy over there gave me a bottle of tequila," he said, indicating behind him to Gunn.
"Try more like five," Gunn muttered, getting a giggle from Fred.
"And we need you sober," Wesley said, finishing Cordelia's statement.
"Why go to all the trouble of liqouring me up, then? Oh, wait...because you kidnapped me when I was visiting Buffy's grave!" he shouted.
"You didn't say that part," Cordelia said, throwing a glance at Wesley.
"It didn't seem important."
Spike flew at Wesley. "You bugger! You bloody smart bugger! You haven't an ounce of brains between those large ears of yours, haven't you?"
Spike was a few inches away when Angel finally put a stop to the chaos with one word. "William."
The younger vampire turned around to look at his sire. "Yeah?"
"Here," he said, offering him a mug of warm blood. "You haven't fed lately, have you?"
Spike softened a little at the not of concern in his sire's voice. "Haven't had the heart, or the will." He took the mug but just looked at it. "Been busy with Dawn."
"Who's Dawn?" Cordelia asked. Apparently the spell had never been administered to Angel, Cordelia and Wesley.
"She was the Key. She was made to be Buffy's sister. She...Buffy died to save her." He swallowed a bit of the blood. "Why did I get kidnapped here, Liam?"
Angel nodded, taking the use of his real name in stride. "We need your help. A friend, a former detective in the LAPD...she's had a rough time of things. On top of that, a former bad guy has returned, and he wants to help us. But he's also had it a bit rough. I didn't exactly give him the best send off from LA."
"What did you do?"
"Put a sign on the back of his truck that said 'Cops Suck' and didn't say anything about it."
"Surprised he made it out of town alive," Spike muttered. "And why should they matter to me?"
"One of them...one of them has to go to Sunnydale, and the other one has to stay here. We don't know who. And neither of them are really in any condition to help right now; they're both on pity and guilt trips. Snap them out of it. Figure out who you need more in Sunnydale. Fill them in on everything you can."
"Why couldn't you just have asked me?"
"Would you have come?"
"No."
"That's why you got kidnapped."
***
Spike sat in his room, nursing his mug of blood. He didn't care about anything, but when Angel called him William, a name he hadn't heard in so long...
Taking a sip, he looked out the window at the Los Angeles skyline. He had to do something. Dawn was his lil' niblett, and even she was pulling away because he was self destructing. He had to stop, at least for her.
Turning to the door where he knew Angel was standing, he nodded. "Bring them here tomorrow. I'll talk to them."
***
Kate glared at Lindsey.
Lindsey glared at Kate.
"Perfect," Spike muttered, rolling his eyes. "I take it you two don't like each other.
"He's a corrupt lawyer who gets criminals out when they should be in jail."
"I was. She's a cop who even treats the vampire that helped her solve some cases like shit."
"Well, I'm here helping him now, aren't I?"
"Oh, wow, should I give you a cookie?"
"Enough!" Spike shook his head. "You two don't like each other. You two won't be in the same bloody city much longer. But you have to work together. Look at me and the great poof here," he said, indicating Angel, who stood at the doorway.
"Well," Angel began, but Spike glared at him and he shut up.
"You had to get kidnapped to come here," Lindsey said.
"It's because I was in mourning. I didn't really want to do anything. You two, you're the rope I'm using to pull myself out of the hole I dug for myself." He looked at them. "One of you'll be staying here and the other will be accompanying me to Sunnydale. Who wants to stay here?"
Both of them raised their hands, glowering at each other.
"Won't work that way. I'd let you stay here, but I'd end up playing peacekeeper and there's no way I'd leave the lil' niblett alone like that."
"Who?" Kate asked.
"Dawn. Buffy's sister."
"She didn't have a sister, really," Angel said for Kate and Lindsey's benefit. "She was a Key, but she was real, so real that Buffy died for her."
Spike nodded. "She lost her mum and then her sis and now Buffy's Watcher's leaving, too. She's living with Xander and Anya. Xander's been a chum of Buffy's since high school, and Anya's a former vengeance demon. They're getting married later."
"Interesting," Lindsey said.
"Anyway, you two have one week to come to a decision. If you haven't, I'll decide for you."
***
The days ticked by. Spike kept busy, looking at employment opportunities in the lawyer and cop fields in Sunnydale, talking to Angel about Buffy, calling Dawn.
Dawn was surprised at the small but profound changes in Spike. He seemed more alive and no longer in the strange stupor Buffy's death had thrust him into.
"I can't wait for you to get back," she had told him. "I miss you."
"Miss you too," he'd said quietly. He'd meant it.
***
"Made a decision?"
Lindsey looked at Kate. They held their grudge in check, but the strain showed. The sooner they separated, the better.
"We'll go with your decision."
Spike had figured something like that would happen. "Lawyer-boy, pack your things. You're moving."
"Why didn't you pick me?" Kate asked.
"Because the cops in Sunnydale are stupid." He stood up. "Besides, Angel needs a feminine point of view that doesn't come from the harpy," he said, pointing to Cordelia. "And you're more well liked here then Lindsey is."
Kate nodded while Cordelia glowered. "Get back to Sunnydale, you stupid vamp."
Thinking of Dawn, his only remaining friend in Sunnydale, he replied, "Gladly."