Hey, so I don't own any of the loverly characters that Meg Cabot thought up of, and the backround storyline.
But, this story is mine - - hope you enjoy, -Loves It-... Callie.
Visions
"Go back to him." He said angrily. I looked up into his deep brown eyes with pain but stood still,
"It's a wonder," he said scoffing, realizing I wasn't going to leave, "You said you didn't cheat yet you ran back to him so fast when we were done. So ready to meet his welcoming arms, as if we never existed together." I wanted to cry, I looked down at the ground.
"Go back to him." He said with anger, "Go fuck him, you're his whore." I looked up at him in shock.
"Jesse" I breathed, with tears in my eyes.
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It had all started with a new breeze. A strong wind, the Santa Ana perhaps. The Santa Ana is a wind that blows from the desert, local myths attached. But what it truly meant was; anything could happen.
I had walked out of my house early in the morning, late September, and a breeze blew making the fallen leaves dance in the air. The leaves weren't the oranges and yellows that one would see in New York, where I had previously lived a few years ago. No, these were green like the rest of California, but fall was still chillier than the warm summer that had just passed – and fall had finally come.
I wasn't expecting anything out of the ordinary that day, it was still pretty early but soon my step-brothers would be wakening up and we would go off to school, and then me and my best friends Ceecee and Adam would probably go hang out at the Coffee Clutch or by the beach.
But, unexpectedly a fierce wind hit me as I stepped out the front door, taking Max for an early walk. I was caught off balance and let go of the leash.
Bad move.
Max ran, like any curious dog free from restraint.
"Max!" I yelled after him but something had caught his eye and he ran down our gravel driveway off into the dirt road. "Shit" I muttered under my breathe. I quickly ran after Max, hoping he wasn't going to go very far.
Why had I taken the dog with me? I always got up and jogged in the morning; it was relaxing and kept me in good shape. I usually never took the dog but Andy thought it would be a good idea to give him some exercise. Good idea? Not.
I heard barking and ran quicker, seeing Max with another dog.
"Max!" I said harshly, "Bad boy… making me come after you like this…" I grumbled irritably. The other dog was a big dog too, looked like a German Shepherd mix of some sort.
"Tobey!" I heard a male voice call. The wind picked up again, making my dark hair cover my face. I brushed it away with my hand and saw one of the most gorgeous boys I have ever seen. He jogged up to me and the dogs, a smile on his handsome face.
"Sorry about this," he said, "I let go of the leash accidentally." I took in his features once he got close. He was tall, had dark crisp hair and deep brown eyes that would melt anyone's heart. He was tanned and by the look of him, definitely in shape. He looked like he might have had some sort of Mexican or Latin descent even…
"Hello?" he asked bringing me back to reality. Oh God, why am I even thinking about this, I have a boyfriend – but that doesn't mean I can't find other guys attractive I mean I'm sure he does find other girls-
"Hey," I said with a bit of embarrassment, "Yeah, I let go of the leash too… wind caught me off guard and I stumbled…" I said with a pathetic smile. I looked down at my running shoes, jogging shorts and old t-shirt. I felt like such an idiot,
"Yes, it is pretty strong." He said smiling warmly. "I come from southern California and though there is a nice breeze, it's usually pretty calm."
"Oh, you're new to this area?" I asked.
"Yes, my family and I just moved here only two weeks ago. I'm going to start school later today, senior year."
"Me too." I said, "Well, I mean, not start school because it already started, but I'll be there….. today." I was sounding lamer and lamer every second.
"Do you go to the Junipero Serra Mission"?
"Yeah," I said, "It's a pain in the ass sometimes but the principle is pretty cool and I guess the school it's self is nice." He laughed,
"Well, I'll be going there so I hope everyone is as charming as you are." I blushed in spite of myself, "I'm Jesse. Jesse de Silva." He said putting out a hand to shake. I shook his hand, smiling,
"Suze Simon."
"Short for Susannah?" he asked.
"Yes. But everyone calls me Suze." We stood smiling at each other until suddenly Max lurched out of my hands and I stumbled forward, but I grabbed the leash before he could run off.
"Jesus…" I said embarrassed. But Jesse laughed warmly, "Um, I should be going back… I need to get ready for school."
"Me too." He answered, "I live about a twenty-five minute walk from here by the way." He added.
"Right." I said, "So, I guess I'll see you later then?" I asked.
"Yes, I'll be touring the school later and signing papers with the principle today." He said, "See you around Susannah." He said walking off. I wanted to tell him not to call me Susannah, only my Mom was allowed, but instead I called back,
"See you, Jesse… and Tobey." I said with a laugh and quickly ran off with Max, silently thanking the wind for helping me meet Jesse de Silva.
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Paul Slater pushed me up against the Misson's back wall. He kissed my neck slowly; my hands were entwined in his dark blonde locks. He touched his lips to mine and my whole world blurred.
Who was that guy I was talking to earlier? And why was I so intrigued by him. Yes, he was very good looking but Paul was just as handsome… and sexy… and-
I pushed him off me a bit, panting in spite of the chilly day.
"Paul…" I said in playful warning. He sighed but with a smile, his piercing blue eyes searching mine.
"Alright Suze but it's hard to resist you, you know?" I laughed and we held hands, walking back to the main courtyard. I had meet Paul at the Pebble Beach resort a little over a year ago. He was gorgeous, charming, and cocky but it only sexed up his appeal more. He moved in with his rich Grandpa and came to my school and in a few weeks we started going out. It seemed strange to me that out of all the Kellys and Debbies there were around that he would pick me. He constantly told me that I was more beautiful than them and had brains too.
But we also connected on a much higher level, on the level that allows you to see ghosts. Yes, both of us were mediators… or even more, shifters. He taught me some amazing things in the past few months even if he was a little pushy and expected things in return. Things he couldn't quite get yet,
"There is a party Friday night, at Holly's house." He said as we walked together towards History class that would start soon.
"Yeah, sounds fun." I said thinking about other things. Paul stopped walking and gently pushed me back into one of the many pillars.
"We could make the night really special." He said smiling, kissing me softly on the lips. I made a noise of pleasure and agreement into his lips. He put his hand on the hem of my denim pants,
"You know?" he said looking into my green eyes. I looked right back into his blue ones… I wanted to completely trust him… I did, didn't I? Then why was it so hard to say yes?
I wanted to, believe me there had been plenty of close calls. But something held me back… I wasn't even sure what, I mean Paul was a great boyfriend, and any girl would cut off their arm to be with him let alone sleep with him. Err, that's extreme but I'm sure Debbie would. I smiled weakly and nodded,
"Yeah." I breathed out nervously. I was a virgin, and Paul was definitely not. I never really wanted to ask him when he first lost it or how many girls he has been with, I really don't, but regardless he was experienced. I didn't feel bad, I was only seventeen, but still, I felt bad for keeping him at bay, I shouldn't but I did. He looked so genuine and we had been going out a pretty long time… I gave in. "Yeah, alright, Friday." I said with a smile. He beamed,
"You make me so happy Suze Simon!" he said lifting me up in the air and twirling me around, I laughed. I touched the ground and he kissed me deeply, I kissed back.
"We, mmmph, and going to, mmmm, be late!" I breathed, laughing.
"Who cares?" He said sexily, deepening the kiss. The bell shattered and I looked towards it, seeing Jesse de Silva walking with Father Dominic only a few feet away. Great… so I'm caught making out in front of an old priest and I'm embarrassed to see Jesse like this, oh, and on top of that; I'm late for class.
"Ahem." Father Dom coughed, his eyebrows raised.
"H-hi." I said embarrassed, shoving Paul away quickly. Paul smiled charmingly,
"Sorry Father D., couldn't help myself." I looked at him and glared, not helping the situation. "We'll be going to class now." He added.
"Good to see you again Susannah." Jesse said with a small smile of amusement on his lips. I was forced to look at him,
"You too." I said quietly, totally embarrassed. Paul looked quizzically at us, Jesse filled him in,
"We live nearby, I met Susannah this morning."
"Yes, well, Suze is quite the friendly gal." Paul said kissing my cheek.
"When you said getting to class 'now', I assumed you would be getting to class now?" Father Dominic asked sternly but with a smile.
"Okay, okay." I said putting my hands up in surrender. "We're going; just don't tell the big guy above about our horrible deeds of missing class." I said with a laugh. Father Dom rolled his pale blue eyes,
"Let's continue our tour Mr. de Silva." he said.
"Nice to see you again Susannah, and you…?" Jesse asked,
"Paul. Paul Slater." Paul said nodding his head coolly.
"Yes, well, see you later then." Jesse said as he and Father Dominic walked off.
"We should go to class now." I said tugging on Paul's hand.
"Yeah…" Paul said looking back to me, "Let's go." This already wasn't a good start; I should have taken it as a sign.
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Ceecee, Adam and I sat down at the Coffee Clutch after school chatting about well, everything and nothing.
"So THEN I shot this huuuuge spit ball towards Mark Figalo, you know him right?" Adam was saying animatedly.
"Yeah, jock guy right? He plays football with Brad." I said.
"Yeah, him. Total asshole. Anyways, so the spit ball was huuuge and hit him right in the ear! It was totally sick!" Adam said laughing.
"He is probably going to kick your ass tomorrow." Ceecee said rolling her lavender eyes.
"Well… maybe. But I don't think he knew it was me, the guy is pretty dumb. Plus he will get detention." Adam said, reassuring himself. I laughed, Adam was such a dork, but in a cute way.
"Speaking of detention, if you come to class late anymore Suze, I'm sure you'll end up there." Ceecee said raising her eyebrows playfully.
"I know, I know." I grumbled. "I was, um, distracted."
"Meaning Hottie McNaughty held you captive?" she said. I burst out laughing, my blueberry frappuccino dribbling down my chin a little. I took and napkin and swiped it away,
"Hottie McNaughty?" I asked in amusement.
"That's what many of the girls have started calling him." Ceecee said rolling her eyes. Adam snorted,
"I should have a nickname. Like… The-Love-Of-Everyone's-Life-Boy… or something."
"Riiight." Ceecee said but blushed.
"More like, Wears-His-Shirt-Inside-Out-Boy." I said laughing.
"That was ONE time!" Adam yelled. We all laughed along, and the familiar 'ding' of the bell above the Clutch's door rang. I looked over and Jesse de Silva walked in.
"Hey, I know him. He's new to our school." I said. Ceecee and Adam looked over.
"Wow." Ceecee said. Adam rolled his eyes,
"We really don't need another tan, muscle-building jerk for the female population to drool over."
"He isn't a jerk." I piped up, waving at him. He smiled and waved back, walking over. He sat in the empty seat beside Adam.
"Hello, I have seen you everywhere today, Susannah." He said smiling. Ceecee looked skeptic, he just called me 'Susannah.'
"Suze." I pressed. "Anyways, this is Ceecee and Adam."
"Royal best friends and protectors of one, Suze Simon." Adam said shaking Jesse's hand animatedly. Jesse laughed.
"Nice to meet you two."
"At first we thought you might be a water polo playing jerk." Adam said. Ceecee rolled her eyes,
"Please don't listen to him. He has no concept of manners." She said and we laughed.
"No, I do not play water polo. A bit of riding when I can, some football too." He said.
He told us about the ranch he used to live on, about his old school. And we told him a little about our lives… then for the next two hours, we all told about ourselves and he told about himself, and it felt like we had known each other for years.
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Jesse asked if he could drive me home. Adam was going to drive Ceecee and me home but since Jesse only lived twenty minutes away, I decided it would be quicker and easier on Adam. We drove casually, listening to the radio, chatting along.
"Oh, so, sorry about today." I said with a small blush.
"Why is that querida?" …Keerida what now?
"Keer… what?" I asked. Jesse smiled,
"What about today?" I looked at him but he drove on, with a smile on his lips. Knowing he wasn't going to say anything about that 'keer' word, I continued with a sigh,
"I don't know. Me… and Paul. It's a little embarrassing."
"It is fine to be kissing one's boyfriend." He stated simply.
"I know but I mean… never mind then." I said rolling my eyes, looking out the window. Jesse laughed,
"Don't feel embarrassed." He said and I smiled weakly at him. Why did I feel embarrassed? I shook my head. Soon (after some directions from me) we made it to my house. Jesse parked the car (a Land Rover) and turned to me,
"Well, have a good night querida." He said.
"What does that word mean? Keer…ida…?" I asked.
"Querida." Jesse said laughing. "Nothing really." He said smiling warmly.
"Fine." I huffed folding my arms over my chest.
"Do you want me to walk you to the door?" Jesse asked.
"No," I laughed, "It's fine. Oh, but the way; there is this party of Friday night. At this girl, a friend of mine, sort of, well – at her house. Did you want to come?" I asked. "You don't know many people other than me… and well, Ceecee and Adam so this is a good chance to meet people. You'll find out that people are a lot different than us three." I said.
"Well, I do enjoy your three's company… but I would like to go. You'll be there?" he asked.
"Yes, Paul and I will be. And Cee and Adam too… I need to tell them about it though." I said laughing.
"Okay, I'll go, I haven't been to a party in a long time it seems." He said thoughtfully.
"You'll be surprised then."
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We walked through the glass doors into Holly's big mansion on Friday night, noise hitting our ears, scandaly clad people hitting out eyes and alcohol hitting our noses. Jesse had driven me there, as Paul had detention (too many lates… oops.) and had come later by himself. We walked in, instantly taking in the loud noise of whatever latest hit song was playing, girls dressed in bikinis and short skirts, guys dancing with them as close as they could get, everyone sipping on tequila or beer.
Jesse certainly looked surprised.
Probably different from the parties on the ranch. You know, dancing around hay bales and such, daring each other to tip cows. That's probably what happens… anyways,
I walked in, getting hugs from various people, some already smashed. Paul slid across the room up to me,
"Hey babe!" he shouted above the music, kissing me on the lips. I could taste alcohol.
"Hey." I said back, holding his hand. He looked amazing just wearing simple black jeans and a dark blue dress shirt. He looked me up and down,
"You look hot." He said laughing a little drunkenly. I was wearing a short black mini skirt, with a dark green top that hugged me.
"Thanks." I said as he handed me a cup of whatever.
"Drink up me lady, yo ho!" he yelled in a pirate swagger. I joined people in the kitchen for shots. Paul had gone off somewhere already; he could never stay in one place for too long. I looked back towards the doors, Adam and Ceecee had arrived looking very out of place.
"Suze, they probably don't want us there…" she said over the phone.
"Of course they do!" I answered back. "We've been many times!"
"You've been many times, Suze." Cee said. "They like you. You're gorgeous and going out with the most popular guy in school. You fit in with them." I scoffed,
"I certainly do not."
"Maybe on the outside, I meant." Ceecee said.
"Whatever Cee, you have fun at these things and they don't care if you come. You don't have a choice, you're coming." I said jokingly.
"Fiiiine." She answered.
"Just make sure Adam doesn't were his 'Alien' t-shirt." I said with a grimace.
"I don't dress him." Ceecee said; I heard her embarrassment through the phone.
"Right." I said laughing.
I ran up to them,
"Hey!" I said happily. They looked relieved to see me. Jesse was nearby talking to some guys, whilst many girls stood nearby, practically drooling. I rolled my eyes,
"He fits in nicely." I said. Ceecee and Adam followed me back into the kitchen. Paul came up, one of his friends messing up his hair with his hand. Paul shoved him away, more playfully than mean.
"Screw off!" he said. He came up to me, putting his arms around my shoulders, hugging me and kissing my neck from behind.
"I want you." He said loudly in my ear. I blushed and pushed him away, leading him away from Adam and Ceecee.
"Yes?" I asked looking slightly annoyed.
"You need more alcohol!" He said giving me a shot of tequila. Oh hell, I swung it down.
"Good girl." He said, kissing me hard.
Most of the night was sort of a blur. A mixture of shots, cheering with people, and dancing my ass off. Suddenly in the middle of dancing crazily, Paul grabbed my face and kissed me, with need.
"Let's go." He whispered. He took my hand and was leading me away. I tripped forward, stumbling to the ground. A set of different hands were picking me up,
"Are you alright Susannah?" they asked. I looked up dizzily at Jesse.
"Heeheeee." I laughed drunkily.
"Maybe you need to sit down?" he offered, concern in his voice.
"Maybe she needs to come with me." I heard Paul say, in an annoyed voice. He tugged me into his arms, leading us up the stairs of the house.
"I do not meant to butt in but you are both quite drunk and-"
"And what?" Paul snorted.
"Paul…" I said. I wanted to tell him to stop being mean. But instead I grabbed onto his shirt for balance, breathing in his cologne.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude…" Jesse said,
"That's right, don't." Paul said rudely, taking me away from the swim of faces, away from Jesse and up the stairs.
We barged into a room to find some sort of threesome going on.
"Shit, sorry." Paul said laughing, closing the door and finding a different room. I laughed hysterically. Paul smiled, kissing me deeply. We stood in the hall kissing passionately until I was too dizzy.
He found us a room and closed the door behind him. Suddenly I found myself being pushed into a mattress on the bed. We kissed; he kissed heavily, greedy for more. His hand slid up my thigh, making me hot. He toyed with my skirt, soon pulling it off.
I pulled his shirt over his head, smiling drunkenly at his godly body. My hand slid down his lean abs and lower into his jeans, he gave an appreciated groan. Soon my shirt was gone and we fooled around like we always did until we both ended up, naked in bed except for my underwear. He suddenly leaned down off the bed and was getting something out of his jeans pocket. I heard a crinkle and knew it was a condom wrapper. I suddenly felt really nervous. We had done everything but. I mean, why not? I certainly trusted him enough.
But did I love him? Oh…
Suddenly everything felt too dizzy to handle. I… I wasn't even sure if I loved him. Why didn't I? Why? We had said, 'love you' many of times but did I really mean 'I love you?' Uncertain about my feelings, I sat up, alarmed. He came back and kissed my neck, massaging me. But I pushed him away,
"No." I said. He pretended like he didn't hear me and ripped open the condom package.
"Paul." I said, getting his attention.
"Yeah?" He asked, looking into my eyes, his full of lust, mine of uncertainty.
"I… I can't" I managed to spit out.
"What?" he demanded.
"I can't do this with you."
"With who then?" he said with disbelief.
"No, that's not what I meant. I mean… I'm just not ready right now."
"You're kidding me right?" He asked, his face stony.
"N-no." I said, pulling the covers up over my chest. Paul looked still, then angry.
"Are you fucking joking? Then when will you be ready Simon?!" he yelled. I flinched a little.
"I don't know. Soon." I said, trying to give him some hope, though I honestly didn't know. "Just not know." Paul looked like he was trying to control his anger. He knew it didn't matter what he would say or do, it wasn't going to happen tonight. He got up and pulled his boxers on, and his pants. He sat on the end of the bed and ran his fingers through his hair, annoyed.
"I'm sorry…" I said, sounding sad and small. He didn't say anything, putting his shirt back on. He took a joint out of his pant's pocket and held it in his fingers.
"I'm going to go smoke this downstairs with Anderson and Mike." He said.
"Yeah, okay." I said and he left. I hugged myself, alone in the dark room. Tears slid down my face, why did I feel so bad? I quickly got dressed and stumbled out the room, coming downstairs and back into the party. I knew I looked like a mess; my hair was probably everywhere, my makeup all over my face from crying.
"Are you okay?" I heard Ceecee ask beside me.
"I'm ok." I lied, drinking as much as a could for the next hour, until blacking out.
Alrighty, well hope you liked it - - more mediator stuff comming up in further chapters (of course) - - give me a review so I know how I'm doing to continue the story!
Loves it,
Callie.