My secret Santa gift for batsutousai, as part of the Radiata Stories Secret Santa on tumblr! I hope you like it. :D
The New Faction of the Olacion Order always thrived on their riches during the holidays. Yes, they donated to charity just like any Olacion priest, but that didn't mean they kept a large portion of their dagols for themselves.
It sickened Eon.
He stood outside the window to Dwight's house, his face glowing from the yellow light illuminating the house. Dwight was inside, along with Eugene, eating the biggest turkey dinner Eon had seen all year. The plucked beast was accompanied by many side dishes, some including side vegetables of rare, exquisite taste. It figured that he'd save those for himself.
Hence, the other members of the Void Community would make their move, while the rest of Radiata's citizens were caught up in the festive holiday spirit. It could be pretty ridiculous how easy they made themselves open, especially when they had their arms full of gifts. All the best pickpockets back in Black Town would compete their findings to try and earn bragging rights.
Eon didn't care about wallets though. He preferred swooping in for the kill, like a bird of prey, and flying off with a real prize before anyone could blink. That was how dishonourable thieves ought to work.
"Heeeey Eon!"
Eon looked up to see Elmo and Joaquel leaning over from where they crouched on the roof; if they tipped over any further they'd be falling off.
Eon was not enthused to see them. "You're a thief yet you don't act like you know what 'quiet' means."
"Dude, lighten up, they'll never hear us out here!" But Elmo let his tone drop to a whisper anyways. "So you had the bright idea of coming here to huh?"
"Me could smell the food aaaaall the way from across city!" Joaquel chimed in.
"Is Ortoroz gonna give you a bonus for that?"
"Dude."
Elmo leapt down, landing into a feline crouch, and Joaquel hopped down rather ungraciously after him, shaking the ground beneath the three. They all squatted down, beneath the view of the windows and keeping out of site as best as they could.
"Ortoroz is actually the one who told us you'd be here," Elmo chirped, slitted pupils glinting with mischief, "and we thought we'd come on over and help because we're such good friends, right Joaquel?"
"Tha's right!"
Eon just stared, waiting for them to continue.
"So, we thought that we'd make this a joint mission! Thieves like us don't get holidays, so why not help each other out and make one of our own?"
Joaquel nodded along to Elmo's proposition enthusiastically, but the way he was salivating had Eon thinking there was really only one thing on his mind. He stifled a sigh within his mask. Not even during the holidays could he catch a break from other punks trying to move in on what would otherwise be solely his rewards.
And he had his reasons for hoarding those rewards too.
"So what you think?" Joaquel asked. "You gonna join?"
Eon stroked his chin to feign thoughtfulness, then nodded. "Sure. Someone was bound to plunder ol' Eisenhower anyways. So what's the plan?"
His response was a pair of gleeful smiles, followed by a hushed whisper of the initial plan.
"Okay..." Eon whispered after they finished up. "But I'm in on this under one condition."
"What's that?"
"I'm the one who goes in while you two make with the diversion."
"What?! No way!" Elmo snapped.
"You jus' gonna make off with loot you'self!" Joaquel added.
"What? You come to me to make a heist with me, yet you don't even trust me?" Eon placed a hand over his heart, obviously very offended.
"It's not that," Elmo retorted flatly. "We just know you well enough not to trust you without keeping an eye on you."
"Then why'd you come to me at all, hmm?"
"We—" Elmo and Joaquel looked at each other, but could only fumble for words.
"Listen, it's the holidays, right? And you said so yourself that we should make our own. You think I don't wanna do that with you guys? Like you said, we're good friends."
Joaquel turned to Elmo for approval, who only squinted suspiciously before giving a reluctant nod.
"Nnn, fine! But if you jump ship we're totally getting you back for it!"
Dwight and Eugene had only just finished their appetizers when they heard a knock at the door.
"Really? At this hour?" Dwight fumed. "Don't people have families to celebrate with?"
"I'll get it, sir." Eugene promptly stood and made his way to the door. Dwight stood as well, expecting the visitors to request his presence, and swiped across his bald head with his sleeve (not that it did much good for his sweat.)
Dwight faced the door as Eugene opened it up, standing by in butler-fashion, as they beheld two carollers dressed in large coats and top hats, with rims that obstructed their faces.
Before Dwight could inquire anything, they began to sing.
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring
Snowing and blowing up bushels of fun
Now jingle hop has begun
That was Eon's cue. He opened the window as softly as he could before snaking towards the dining table. Lifting up one of his bags, he tried to block out the sound of Elmo and Joaquel singing as he began to pilfer the food. Elmo's voice was too high and screechy, like a cat, and Joaquel's was too low and strident. It was amazing that they hadn't gotten the door slammed into their face yet.
What people do for reputation, Eon tsked, shaking his head as he quietly as he bagged a turkey, along with some of that fine silverware.
Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells chime in jingle bell time
Dancing and prancing in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air.
Eon glanced up to make sure he hadn't been noticed, when he caught the sight of Eugene leaning in to whisper into Dwight's ear. He ducked out of sight, keeping himself and his bags hidden.
"Do you feel a draft?" Eugene whispered as Elmo and Joaquel carried on. "I'm getting shivers all of a sudden.
"What are you talking about?" Dwight asked. "It's boiling in here."
Eugene didn't even bat an eye at that. He wondered why he should've asked in the first place.
Seeing them both turn to the "carollers," Eon resumed his work, nabbing a fine pitcher filled with grade A Tria Milk.
What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away
As he picked up the plate of buns, his elbow knocked against a glass, rattling it.
Eugene's hair perked up with his attention, and he looked around.
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go gliding in a one-horse—
"Hey!"
The four by the door all looked up at Eon, who stooped like a deer in the headlights.
"What is the meaning of this?!" Dwight shrieked, fists flailing.
At that point, Joaquel and Elmo discarded their disguises, the clothes billowing like sheets in the wind, and they hopped forward to restrain the two priests.
"Go! Go!"
Eon collected his bags and leapt out the window without hesitation. Elmo and Joaquel shoved the two men to the ground and made their quick getaway into the night.
They dashed with stealth, making their way around to the front of the chapel—their decided meeting point—but Eon was nowhere to be found.
"Where is he?" Joaquel asked, looking around.
Elmo seethed, ripping the cap off his head and throwing it to the ground.
"Dammit all!"
Eon made his way through White Town by rooftop, having no regrets about living the terrible two behind. They weren't easy to sway; if he got more treasures (or foods) by the time they next ran into each other, he'd be able to sway them over.
A light was on in a nearby house, one he recognized as Waldo General Store. He could recall Jack Russell telling him he had bought rat medicine for their once, and thought about Mr. Nask and his pet Smilodon. It was pretty crazy that he owned a Smilodon at all. But it was pretty tame, and hadn't bitten his head off yet, so Eon had no problem with it.
He looked down at his bags, and then made a decision.
Slinking down to the ground, Eon set down the bag with the turkey and silverware (after making sure it was relatively intact) and then knocked on the door. Climbing back up in a second, he waited and listened as Nask opened the door.
"Don't people know we're closed—oh."
Eon watched as Nask looked around before tentatively opening the bag. A small gasp was heard, and Nask picked up the bag and turned to go inside.
"Guess what we're having tonight!" He called into the house before closing the door behind him.
Without another thought, Eon leapt away from the roof, moving on to Mage Town.
"Oh, hello there! Are you a friend of Pooch's too?"
Eon ducked for cover at the sound of squealing. He didn't think anyone would be walking around the Path to the Beast Pit at this time of night, but lo and behold, another member of the Olacion Order was there. She carried a white cat, presumably Pooch, in one arm, a pouch of food in the other, and was speaking to another cat huddled beneath some garbage cans. He recognized her as Lulu, the one everyone mistook as another member of the Ryan family.
"Merry Christmas little one," Lulu cooed to the cat as she knelt down, opening her pouch. "You look awful hungry. Would you like some treats?"
The cat hissed and backed away from her, but Lulu wasn't deterred. Even as she placed some treats onto the ground, the cat did not come out.
Eon shook his head from where he watched. She wasn't gonna get anywhere like that.
Once again, Eon recalled the food he was carrying, and sighed. At this rate he wasn't going to have anything for back home.
Why am I even doing this?
Still hidden, he let out a soft mewling sound. Lulu let out a startled gasp as Pooch pounced from her grasp and trotted towards Eon.
Eon dumped the buns out of their bowl and into a bag, and put the bowl in with the pitcher. He clicked with his tongue as he placed the bag next to Pooch, and pointed to Lulu and the other cat.
Pooch sat, and started mewling loudly, turning to Lulu. Lulu looked up.
"Pooch, what is it?" Lulu went up to her cat, and saw the bag that accompanied her. Curious, Lulu picked it up, and surprised to pull out such a beautiful pitcher, and matching bowl right after.
"There's fresh milk in here!" She exclaimed to the cats, both of which perked their ears at that. Confused, Lulu looked around for where this had come from. She knew that the bag wasn't there five minutes ago; she would've seen it for sure. But no one else was around.
Smiling about this holiday miracle, she put the bowl down and poured the drink for the cats. It wasn't until after many encouraging waves that the stray slowly stalked over to join Pooch. Lulu smiled, happily sitting and watching the two enjoy their meal.
At long last, Eon arrived home.
Interlude was nowhere to be seen, which was probably why Eon's family of rats were huddled in front of the furnace. The second Eon stepped into the room they squeaked in greeting, all scattering towards him.
"Hey guys," Eon whispered, sitting on the ground before them all. "Interlude been keeping you warm? Heh heh. I got some treats just like I promised. It's not as much as I planned, but I, uh, ran into some other animal buddies who I thought would like some presents too."
Eon placed a few of the buns on the ground, and the rats immediately dug into the food, happily screeching. Pulling down his mask, Eon took a bite out of the bread, just warm enough to be enjoyably edible.
The room may have been dark and cold, and he may not have been surrounded by many people, but Eon wouldn't have wanted to spend his holiday any other way.