Author's Note: this is a series of one-shots focusing on Kurtbastian. So, my goal is to reach 100+ chapters. Yeah, big goal (*wince*) but, I got a bit bored with Of Princesses and Meerkats (I have like writers block. I don't even know, with a request and all, but I can't put it to words! Maybe this will help.) and I thought, what the heck? Just do this. I do prompts (*glares at you*) so request. A lot. Please. :D
"No way."
"Yes way."
"No."
"Yes."
"Bas, you know how much he hates me and-"
"Blaine's a stuck-up jerk. You're going to a Warblers party because you are a Warbler, Kurt. Don't let Blaine ruin your fun."
"Oh Bas…"
"It's not his fault you left him for someone awesome like me."
"And here I was thinking you were actually thinking about someone else besides yourself."
"You should know better, Kurtie."
"Don't you dare Sebastian Smythe!"
"Aw…you let Jeff call you that."
"Because it's Jeff, Sebastian."
"…good point."
"I always have good points."
"Coughfucknocough."
"What was that?"
"Nothing babe."
"That's what I thought. Now, if we're all going to the Warblers party, you better help me pick out an outfit."
"Kuuuuuurt. That's gonna take hours."
"Good thing the party starts at six, isn't it?"
"Ugh."
"Bas."
"Fine. Whatever. I'll pick something sexy, don't worry. Wouldn't want to make Blaine jealous, wouldn't we?"
"Bas. I thought we discussed this. No blatant displays of possessiveness."
"Kuuuuurt."
"Sebastian."
"Ugh. Fine. Whatever. It's not like I care or anything. Let's just hurry up and pick an outfit."
-Kurt&Sebastian-
"That went well."
"Shut up, Smythe."
"Aw. Come on Kurt. I'd say that went really well, wouldn't you?"
"Listen, I am this close to-"
"Tsk tsk. I thought you were the pacifist in this relationship? Anyway, did you see Blaine's face? Fucking hilarious. I thought he had diarrhea or something. It was amazing and-"
"Sebastian."
"-Jeff just went over and demanded to play Seven Minutes In Heaven, and Blaine was like trying to rig the game so he'd end up with you, which made me fucking pissed, but for some reason, it ended with me and you and it was like we were made to be and-"
"Sebastian."
"-Nick was making out with Jeff on the couch and Wes was singing this super sob song and we all cried and Santana crashed the party with the rest of Nude Erections and we were all like, not cool, and Finn kept saying dude and I kept saying stop and then Blaine decided to try and make you jealous by making out with the girls, but he ended up getting beat up by Mike, Finn, Sam, and Santana, and Brittany was all like, you're not a dolphin anymore, you're a fish and I just cracked up because what the hell? That didn't make sense and then Bear Cub crashed in and screamed that he loved you and I wanted to punch him but then I realized he was drunk and then we ended up hanging out and then he gave me those sugar cubes, like tons of it, and we were all like, gimme me, but then I ended up stealing most of it, and it was awesome and-"
"Sebastian."
"Kurt? My love? My beloved? Light of my life? My soon-to-be? My beautiful boyfriend?"
"How many sugar cubes have you had?"
"Like, one."
"…"
"Okay, two."
"…"
"Seriously? You're giving me your poker face? That's not gonna work, cause I am a master at keeping my secrets. You should know Kurt, I never let you in on the important stuff. Ha, kidding, but still. I'm a master at keeping secrets. I'm practically Nick Fury. In the living flesh."
"…"
"Okay, okay I ate the whole batch! I'm sorry, don't give me that look!"
"We're going home."
"Yes, sir."
"You will calm down."
"Can't. Ate too many sugar. Sugarsugarsugar. Whew! Hey, do you know what game I like? Sugar sugar. It's so cute and fun and-"
"Bas."
"Right. Getting in the car now."
"…"
"Okay."
"…"
"Kurt, do you think you can teach me that poker face? Cause I wanna be all ninja like you and be like, obey me for I am your master, and then, maybe I can be like Yoda! I'll be like, the force is with you, because I have this awesome poker face. Maybe the government will need me because of my face, and then I'll be like, make me president first, and then they'll obey, because this face is awesome. Hey Kurt? Kurtkurtkurt? Kurtie? Kurt, babe, are we there yet? Are we there yet? Arewethereyet?Arewethereyetarewethereyetarewethereyet?"
"I knew that party was a bad idea."
Author's Note: Poor Kurt. Anyway, I wrote this in the spur of the moment. Ha. Lol. So, what do you think? Next chapter, I'm doing prompts. Meaning, there won't be a next chapter without prompts (*coughs*get some ideas people. Cause I'm out of them and all and I'm relying on you :D kidding, but still, please do promts!). Also, Sebastian with sugar? That's me with sugar (*laughs sheepishly*). Anyway, please! Ideas! Like, seriously. Anything.