"I am an Angel of the Lord." He muttered to himself repeatedly. The empty darkness of the fluffy, white panic room was his only friend as he carefully rocked himself back and forth. "I am an Angel of the Lord." It was all he ever said these days, and it wasn't long before he realized that this simple declaration was the reason for his imprisonment within the Lawrence Medical Center for Mental Health.
Hearing the heavy metal bar begin to creak on the other side of the door, the man ceased his rocking and rambling. The staff of nurses gently pushed against the door and stared at the man that was curled into a ball in the center of the all-white room.
"Castiel," they called out. They were patient with him, knowing he didn't mean them, nor anyone else, any harm. The only person this man was a danger to was himself, but it wasn't always that way. If he didn't start off crazy, they believed he could be cured. That was what they truly believed.
Taking a deep breath, Castiel opened his eyes and moved his gaze onto the small group of nurses gathered in front of him. With determination burning in his gut, he stood up and said, "I am human."
From that day on, he knew that freedom was within his reach. Lie. You're a human; angels don't exist. He thought to himself every time they asked him what he was and brought him in for more testing. He knew it was what they wanted to hear, even if it wasn't true - to him.
-.::.-
"Hello, Castiel." Doctor Richard Roman greeted as he walked into his office. Castiel was already sitting in his usual seat and clutching a book in his arms as if it were a teddy bear.
"Hello, Doctor Roman." Castiel spoke, his eyes meeting the doctor's in all seriousness.
"Is that a good book?" Doctor Roman asked with a sweet smile as he took the seat at his desk. Chuckling, Castiel loosened his hold on the text and set it down on the table for the doctor to see.
"It's a bible on human communication. When I am released, I would like to be able to speak with others without sounding socially inept." Castiel admitted as the doctor looked over the book before giving him a skeptical look.
"You used the word 'bible' instead of book. Why is that?" He asked, grabbing his notepad and a pen. Smiling, Castiel shook his head in slight disbelief.
"I don't understand your question, Doctor Roman. A bible is a book. In my definition, that is all it is." Of course, the doctor was skeptic. He had to be; that was his job. "I know what you're thinking, Doctor, but that's all in the past. I have given over four years of my life to believing in God, and that I was one of his angels, sent here on a mission. I'm moving on passed that phase because I'm starting to realize that my health is more important than some crazy belief. Everyone believes that they're special in some way; I just took it too far." Castiel said as he recovered his book.
"In these past four years, I have seen many sides to you, Castiel Novak." Doctor Roman started as he stood from his seat and walked over to the man. "But this, this is something new and something life changing for you. That's why we've decided to release you. For two weeks now, we've been monitoring your progress without your medication, and it's become clear that you don't belong here. We've already contacted your family, and your brother is already here to get you and take you home. I just want to make sure you're ready for this." He explained.
"I am." There was no hesitation in his answer. He was firm and his eyes were set hard. How could anyone believe he was lying? How could anyone think that this man was ever crazy? In that moment, it wasn't possible.
"I'll go get your brother. Wait here." Doctor Roman said before exiting the room and leaving the "ex-angel" alone in his office. Sighing, Castiel slumped back into his chair and let his blue eyes glide toward the ceiling.
"Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned." He whispered, and then shut his eyes and let the bliss of knowing that freedom was finally in his reach take over. In just an hour, Castiel would be outside, fully "cured" and ready to take on the world. At least, that's what everyone believed.
"Cassie?" Gabriel's voice called out to him. Re-opening his eyes, the man shifted his gaze toward the door and felt his heart swell once his eyes landed on his elder brother.
"Hello, Gabriel." Castiel said as he stood up and approached the older Novak with a smile. "It's been a long time since I've seen your face. How is everything?" He asked, but Gabriel was drowning in his emotions. He yanked his younger brother into a bone-crushing hug and cried into his shoulder.
"I'm so glad you're finally back to normal, Castiel. We've all missed you so much!" Gabriel cried. Then why didn't any of you ever visit? Castiel mentally groaned as he returned his brother's embrace and awkwardly patted his back.
"Isn't this a joyful sight?" Doctor Roman noted as he re-entered the room with that overly cheery smile still slapped on his face. "One of the nurses made it their duty to pack up all of your things, so Gabriel already has them waiting in the car for you. Now, all you have to do is sign out of the hospital and be on your way towards a new life." He continued, passing Castiel a clipboard and a pen.
"I just sign this, and then I'm free for good?" The younger Novak asked, his eyes glued to the blank, bold line that awaited his signature.
"Well, we hope it's for good." The doctor joked, but no one laughed. Sighing, Castiel clicked the pen and glided the inked tip over the paper in the form of his signature. And with that, he was free.
-.::.-
Dean Winchester was the local hero in Lawrence, Kansas. He was a cop with an extremely good reputation, which was saying something in this day and age. He always put the civilians first, and his bravery had saved countless of lives. However, these weren't the only things that made the Winchester special. There was more to the man than he cared to share.
"-ean!" The man beside him shouted, pulling the Winchester from his train of thought and making him jump slightly.
"Yea? What? What do you want?" Dean asked with a sigh as he turned his gaze from the cloudless, blue sky to the man beside him.
"I think you need to get your head out of the clouds. I was askin' if you wanted to go on patrol." Bobby repeated in irritation. Bobby was an older officer, known more for his snarky comebacks than anything else.
"Yea, sure. That sounds great." Dean said with a sigh.
"Balls. I thought you would have rejected the invitation. Now, we really do have to go on patrol." Bobby grumbled, and Dean arched an eyebrow at him.
"Or I could just go alone. I'm not a kid, Bobby." Dean offered.
"No, you're just an idjit. Like Hell I'm gon' let ya' go alone, kid. Just get your butt in the car and let's go." The older man snapped, and Dean did as told with an eye roll and a shake of the head. Bobby was one man you didn't want to piss off, and Dean learned that the hard way.
"Where to first, boss?" Dean asked as he slid into the driver's seat.
"Narnia." Bobby said before adding, "Does it look like I care, boy? Just drive the damn car." And with that, Dean started up the engine and drove off. Of course, the only time Dean decided to fight back against Bobby was when the older man decided to try and pick the music.
"The next time you drive, you can pick the music, but you're not driving right now. Don't you know the rules by now, Bobby? Driver picks the music; shotgun shuts his cakehole!" Dean argued.
"I ain't sittin' here listenin' to this crap the whole time. I'm changin' the station, even if it hurts your feelings, princess!" Bobby shouted back, changing the station as promised. Groaning, Dean returned his attention to the road and came to a screeching stop when he saw the massive traffic line. "What in the world?" Bobby whispered as Dean climbed out of the car.
Amongst the pile up, there was a crowd of onlookers with their heads back and their eyes glued to something above. Confused, Dean followed their gaze and nearly had his heart beat out of his chest in a panic.
"This is Officer Dean Winchester in need of a 10-52 effective immediately. I repeat, I need a 10-52 now!" Dean shouted before handing the walkie to his partner, so that he could give them the coordinates before rushing off into the building. "Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!" Dean cursed as he raced up the stairs, finding himself unable to wait for an elevator.
-.::.-
Castiel hadn't felt so amazing in years, and he was prepared to enjoy ever second of his new found freedom. While he and his brother had made a stop at a local diner, he had made it his mission to sneak out and get to the top of the nearest, tallest building. He didn't regret it.
Now, with the wind in his hair and his trenchcoat flapping loudly behind him, Castiel knew true freedom. In that moment, nothing else mattered. He was finally going to be able to show everyone that he wasn't crazy; he was finally able to take a leap of faith and fly like he was always meant to.
The gathering and constantly growing crowd beneath him added to his determination. Everyone present was going to witness something that they could have only ever dreamed of. They were all going to be the first to see Castiel take flight as the Angel he always was, and no one could stop him.
Hearing the door get pushed open behind him, Castiel turned on the ledge to face his new arrival with a welcoming smile.
"Hello." He greeted as calmly as ever.
"Hi." Dean said as he attempted to regain control of his breathing patterns. "It's great to meet you. I'm Officer Dean Winchester, and you are?" He introduced himself.
"My name is Castiel." The blue eyed man answered, his smile never faltering.
"Castiel? That a nice name. Do you mind if I call you Cas?" Dean requested as he slowly approached the man, his green eyes not leaving him for a second.
"No, I do not mind, Dean." Castiel replied, and Dean could feel a small electric current run through him at the sound of his name coming from this stranger's lips. Shaking it off, he went back to the matter at hand.
"So, Cas, would you mind telling me what you're doing up here? It's kind of high, don't you think?" Dean questioned.
"I know." Cas deadpanned. Sighing, Dean continued his approach but stopped when he saw Castiel take a small, uneasy step back.
"I'm not going to hurt you, Cas. I want to help you."
"Everyone wants to help me, but they can't. No one can help me because there's nothing wrong with me!" Castiel hissed in anger, and Dean took a deep breath before continuing on.
"Alright, I believe you. There's nothing wrong with you. Then, would you mind telling me why you're on the ledge of a twenty-story building?" He asked, and nearly tripped on air when he saw a genuine smile grace Castiel's handsome, totally-not-crazy-looking face.
"I'm going to fly." Castiel admitted.
"That sounds really cool, Cas. How do you plan to do that?"
"With my wings."
"You have wings?"
"Of course, I am an Angel of the Lord." Castiel stated, and Dean's heart dropped to his stomach in a sense of uneasiness.
"Of course, you are. That's awesome." Dean said and listened closely to the sound of the fire-department's horns blaring in the distance. "Cas, just because you have wings doesn't mean you can fly. Not every Angel can fly. Some are grounded on earth to watch over others and help those in need. Isn't that enough?" Dean asked.
"No, you don't understand. I know I can fly." Castiel argued, his voice low and serious. Dean was almost willing to believe him, but he knew that this man was no angel and had no real wings. If he did, Dean would have known immediately.
"I believe you. If you say you can fly, then you can fly. However, that doesn't mean you should. Cas, there are a lot of people watching you right now, and those people might not be ready for the abilities you have. They're only human; they don't know anything about the supernatural world. Sadly, they probably won't be ready for another hundred years. Are you willing to risk throwing this world into chaos? Aren't Angels meant to be beacons of good?" Dean questioned him, and Castiel's resolve slightly wavered at the other man's words.
"You might be right." He sighed.
"Yes, you know I am. Now, c'mon, get down from there, man." Dean said with a smile as he slowly began to approach the man again. Castiel was about to step down when Dean added, "You have nothing to prove to them."
Feeling the anger rise in his body, Castiel glared at the officer before him and once again returned to his resolution. Seeing the understanding leave Castiel's eyes, Dean once again stopped in his tracks and felt panic build up inside of him.
"I do have something to prove!" Cas shouted, and Dean flinched in surprise. "You don't know anything! You think you understand but you don't! Four years of my life have been ripped away from me because no one would believe me and called me crazy! I'm not crazy!" He continued in outrage. Grinding his teeth together, Castiel raised his arms and let the wind guide him toward the end of the ledge. "I am an Angel of the Lord!" Castiel shouted before letting his body fall.
"Cas!" Dean screamed in horror. He was suddenly faced with a split-second decision, and his choice was obvious. Running for the ledge, Dean dived over the side of the roof and wrapped his arms protectively around Castiel's somewhat smaller frame. Surprisingly, the man had fit perfectly into his arms, as though he had always belonged there.
Just as they were close to hitting the concrete, the sound of wings fluttering caused the blue eyed man to snap his eyes open and find out what happened. What he saw was beyond anything he could have imagined. With his head tucked gently into the crook of Dean's neck, Castiel could see just enough over the other man's shoulder to gaze upon the large pair of black wings that sprouted out of his back.
"You're…" Castiel's voice trailed off as Dean flew them back onto the roof and away from the crowd of onlookers, who were all frozen solid in shock and pure amazement from what just happened.
"Let me to introduce myself properly." Dean said as he gently set them back down on the rooftop. Even after the sole's of their shoes has safely touched the ground, neither of them made a move to pull away. "My name is Dean Winchester, and I am an Angel of the Lord." Dean admitted, and Cas went rigid in his arms.
Dean was a real, giant-feathery-winged-and-breathtakingly-gorgeous Angel of the Lord. He wasn't what Castiel always assume he himself was. No, Dean was the real deal, and he had just clearly proved it. Pulling away from the green eyed man, Cas slowly walked around him on wobbly legs and let the tips of his fingers glide of Dean's feathers. He nearly jumped ten feet in the air when his actions caused the other man to giggle.
"Sorry, that tickles." Dean admitted in a gruff voice, clearly embarrassed. Shaking his head, Castiel stumbled back and fell onto his bottom. "Cas! Cas, you okay?" Dean called, rushing to his side, but Castiel didn't reply. He just stared, eyes wide and body trembling.
Dean could understand his shock; he could understand everybody's shock. As far as they all knew, Angel's weren't real. Angel's were just as much a myth as the Tooth Fairy and the Sandman.
"Th-this is all m-my fault." Cas stuttered, and Dean stared at him in confusion.
"What is?" He asked.
"This! This is all my fault! If I didn't believe I was a real Angel and try to jump off that ledge you would have had to expose yourself like this. I put you in danger. And all for what? So I can prove I wasn't crazy, when clearly I was?" He asked, his eyes shining with tears.
"This isn't your fault, Cas. This was my choice."
"But if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have had to make that choice!"
"People would have found out eventually anyway."
"That's not the point, Dean!"
"Then what is the point?!"
"I put you in danger!" Cas screamed, and Dean recoiled. "You should have let me die. Then there would have been one less crazy person in this world, and your secret would have been safe." He explained.
"I would never let you die." The Winchester growled, and now it was Castiel's turn to draw back in shock.
"Why?" He asked.
"Because I'm an Angel." Of course, that was the reason. Why would an Angel ever let someone die in front of them when they knew they could do something to stop it? That had to be the only reason.
"Right. It comes with the territory." Castiel found himself whispering, his voice drenched in obvious disappointment.
"That's not the only reason I saved you, Cas." Dean argued, his cheeks stained pink as he averted his gaze. Confused, Castiel crinkled his eyebrows and cocked his head slightly to the side in a way that threw Dean over the edge - figuratively, of course. "You're not really going to make me say it, are you?" Dean asked.
"Dean, I do not understand. Why are you so red?" Castiel questioned, and Dean nearly choked on his own saliva.
"Oh, shut up, Cas." He muttered as he yanked the man back into his arms. Hearing people running up the staircase, Dean pulled his wings back into back and snapped his fingers.
"A-are you guys okay?" The firefighters asked, all of them staring at Dean with wide eyes.
"Yea, we're fine." Dean answered them, his arm still securely wrapped around Cas.
"H-how did you-?" A woman in the front asked.
"Bungee." Dean said as though it was the obvious answer. Moving Cas slightly, he showed them the bungee that was wrapped around his waist and pointed toward the steel bars on the roof he had connected it too. Surprised, Castiel pulled away and stared at the bungee as though it was some alien object, wondering where it even came from.
"But we could have sworn-."
"Trick of the eye." Dean cut off the woman again, and she just gave herself a quick shake before nodding and leading the others out to give the two men some privacy.
"She just believed you?" Cas asked in shock.
"Humans would rather believe a rational lie than the unbelievable truth any day. That's because they aren't ready to face the unknown. People fear what they don't understand. That's why, now, every video of the incident just shows me tied to a bungee." Dean explained.
"I'm not afraid." Cas declared, and the green eyed man chuckled.
"That's because you believe in Angels." He noted.
"No, I don't." Cas corrected, and Dean frowned. "I don't believe in angels, not anymore. But I do believe in you, Dean." He continued, a small smile spread across his face.
"Maybe you don't have the wings, but you are a real Angel, Cas."
"I don't want to be an Angel anymore."
"Then what do you want to be?"
"Yours." Smirking, Dean pulled the human closer and stared in his magnificently blue eyes. No matter how clear the sky became, Dean knew it could never compare to the sapphire that shined from this man. "Are you gonna kiss me or not?" Cas asked, interrupting his thoughts, and Dean chuckled before pulling Castiel into a deep, passionate kiss.