There were few things in life that could be counted on quite like seeing Samandriel, Dean and Castiel joined at the hips. Every weekend, even when one or all of them had girlfriends, they were together. There wasn't an exact date but most people around them joked that their anniversary was set during early summer vacation. The summer of their first grade year was the first time the three of them had played together and after that they were inseparable. If one of them was grounded, the other two were finding ways of making it bearable. Even before they had cell phones John and Mary gave up on taking away Dean's phone privileges when he was being punished after the third time that they caught Samandriel and Castiel hiding out in Dean's closet because they climbed in the window.
Fortunately as they got older, and got unlimited texting, the instances of that happening were fewer and farther between. While they may have gotten into less trouble, the three of them were closer than ever as they neared adulthood and high school graduation. Or so Samandriel thought. It all started nearly two months ago.
Whose house they met up at during their free time was a matter of what they needed. If they needed food they went to Dean's (Mary was a Godsend), if they needed quiet or privacy for some reason they went to Cas' (absent parents had few perks but that was one of them) and if they needed to just spend some time outside they went to his house. His father, Luke, owned a farm at the edge of town that boarded horses and supplied meat to the local butcher as well as fresh produce. The farmer's market was probably his favorite summer job and it was even better when Dean and Castiel worked it with him. Needless to say they had a fair bit of land for young boys to blow off some steam.
The weekday in question when it all started was a food day. He was the last one to arrive, despite what anyone thought he did manage to get detention without Dean's assistance some days. It wasn't a surprise to see Cas' bike in Dean's yard, or to find most of the house empty when he stepped inside quietly. He dropped his bag and padded up the stairs, glancing into Sam's room to find him gone. When he reached Dean's door he stopped, it was barely cracked and through it he could see two pairs of legs tangled together in the sheets. After a moment he pushed the door open just wide enough to see to the head of the bed. What he saw shocked him and made his stomach twist in unpleasant ways.
Castiel was on top of Dean, both of them stripped down to their boxers and rutting against each other. One of Dean's hands slid down Cas' back and onto his ass, fingers digging in and pulling him closer. They were kissing and that was when Samandriel had to back away from the door and take a few steps down the hall. He wasn't sure why it bothered him so much, aside from them not telling him. It wasn't like he had a problem with homosexuality. Of course it was one thing when it was just a hypothetical scenario and another thing entirely when your two best friends were dry humping each other.
The house was quiet around him, a ceiling fan whirring softly downstairs, the central air conditioning kicking on to cool the house down. Samandriel sank down to the floor and put his face in his hands. Seeing them together made him sick to his stomach which only served to upset him more. They were his friends and they deserved to be happy. Besides, Dean and Castiel got along better than anyone he knew. Normally he was included in whatever they had, but the three of them couldn't share absolutely everything, right? Right, so he would just have to suck it up and accept that things were changing. No big deal.
Only it was a huge deal and Samandriel wasn't really capable of just sucking it up and moving on. He texted Dean and said he'd be at the house in five minutes. In that time he heard Dean call Castiel angel and heard both of them come. By the time he went downstairs to make some noise so his charade was believable, they were both dressed and looked like nothing had changed. He forced a smile and knew it was a lie.
He tried to be the better man, to not be petulant and childish about it. Dean and Castiel were obviously happier. So much so that even people at school who didn't know them as well as he did were noticing. While they only got happier, he was more miserable. His dad would come into his room and try to talk to him about it, but how were you supposed to explain to your father that your best friends were having a romantic relationship behind your back and that while at first you were worried you didn't like it because you were a bigot, you were beginning to see it was because you were jealous? Surprisingly, that had come as the bigger shock. It was probably the third time he'd accidentally walked in on them. They were supposed to meet at Cas' house.
Just like every other time he hung back and let them finish, only this time he didn't walk away and text them to hurry them along. His curiosity had gotten the better of him, so he stayed on the other side of the hall, looking through the door as clothing was shed. It was wrong and he should have stopped either himself or them, but he didn't. Dean's shirt was removed, then Castiel's and those were quickly followed by their pants. The first two times he'd caught them they'd never removed anything more, but this time was different.
They were grinding into each other again, languid movements that made his skin and jeans tighten. Then Dean smacked Cas' ass and slipped a hand inside his boxer briefs. Cas gasped and Samandriel could see the corner of Dean's smile. It wasn't a smile he'd ever seen before, it was warmer and absolutely intimate. That was the first time he'd wished he was involved, just so he could see that smile up close. Cas whispered something he didn't catch and Dean bit his lower lip, closing his eyes tightly before nodding assent. When Cas started sliding down Dean's body Samandriel had a pretty good idea about what he'd whispered that had set Dean off.
Now, in hindsight, it was creepy and stalkery to just sit there in the hall and watch them strip out of their underwear. Even more creepy and stalkery to watch Cas lick and suck Dean's inner thighs until he reached Dean's dick. After that there was no excuse. He felt ashamed while he watched them, he felt angry and he felt dejected. That was before he even took into consideration the fact that he was fucking hard.
Dean laid back on the bed as Cas sucked him, petting his hair gently and praising him. Samandriel could hear every whimper and moan, even heard the slurping and saw Dean's stomach jump in time to it. Realistically it was probably only a few minutes before Dean's head slammed back into the pillows and his fingers tightened in Cas' hair. But from his perspective, waiting out in the hallway like a voyeur it seemed like hours before Dean moaned out Cas' name and went all boneless. They kissed again and he could hear Dean's sated voice speaking. "When d'you think Alfie's gonna be here?"
Samandriel didn't stick around to wait for Cas to answer, instead opting to quietly make his way to the front door and text them with a fake excuse of why he wasn't showing up. The walk to his house four blocks down and across a grassy field was quiet, his head sadly vacant and his chest hollow. Dean and Castiel were in love with each other and he was in love with both of them.
After that he was withdrawn from everyone, especially Dean and Cas. Even when they were hanging out together, he would sit farthest away and didn't tend to speak unless spoken to. So much of his mind was consumed with the images of them naked and pleasuring each other. The blowjobs were just the start. It progressed to Dean tying Castiel's hands with one of his ties, throwing him down onto his stomach and licking his ass. Upon watching that he snuck off to the Winchester family's basement to ease his suffering. When he came quietly against the concrete wall he had to force himself to sit down and keep from crying. He felt pathetic. Not only was he not telling them he knew, he was a voyeur who pined from the other side of the door and jacked off with them still in the same building. He was going fucking crazy and he really had to do something about it.
Five weeks of his life slowly spiraling into obsession over his best friends. Five weeks of feeling like hell because at first he was pissed off that they didn't tell him and then because he just wanted to be included again. More than anything he just wanted to be theirs and he wanted them to be his. There were probably people that would say he was too young to know if he was in love, but he literally couldn't picture doing anything without Dean and Castiel. They took up every facet of his life and even when they were making him miserable he still hung around. He didn't know if they'd had sex, but he knew Cas was a virgin and the thought of not being there when Castiel lost his virginity was enough to make him dry heave. His own virginity was another matter entirely that he didn't even want to try and contemplate.
In the end he used his socks to wipe up the evidence of his visit and threw them into the hamper. He felt a little weird knowing Mary would likely be the one to do that load of laundry, but that was the least of his concerns. When he went back up Dean had come down looking for him, a soft smile on his face.
"Hey, Alfie, was beginning to think you weren't coming again today." His tone and face were both so earnest and sincere it made him ache. Dean glanced around his shoulder to the basement stairs. "You were in the basement?"
"Yeah, my socks got muddy in the field on the walk over and I didn't feel like turning around just to have it happen again. I put them in the hamper, I'll come get them Friday." Dean accepted the answer easily, pulling him into the kitchen by the shoulder. If he concentrated hard enough he could almost smell Castiel on Dean's skin. He wondered if he'd taste Cas on Dean's tongue should he tug him down into a kiss.
His friend turned to him, bright green eyes soft and open. "Are you okay, Alfie?"
Samandriel swallowed roughly, the nickname stinging against his chest. It was something Dean had come up with during that first summer right after he declared that the name Samandriel was ridiculous. At the time he'd been insulted but now it was just another thing to love about Dean. The same thing had happened with Cas. Most people called him by his full name and a couple people called him by his middle name, James or even Jimmy, but Dean had renamed him Cas and so to them he was Cas. There was something powerful about the way Dean could make someone rethink who they were, right down to the way they were named.
He nodded and tried to smile, but not too forcefully. "Yeah, I'm all right, just kinda stressed about graduation, y'know?" Which was partially true, he was stressed about it, but really only because he couldn't help thinking about the pact the three of them had made the year prior. They'd all go to the same school no matter what. Did that still mean anything now that Dean and Cas were together?
Dean didn't accept this answer as easily, brows scrunching as his expression turned a little sad. "You'd tell me if something was wrong, right? Like, really wrong?" When he didn't respond right away Dean laid a warm hand back on his shoulder and it took everything in him not to lean into it. "Me and Cas are worried about you."
His eyes stung but he still met Dean's eyes and lied right to his friend's face. "I'm okay, Dean, thank you though."
"Yeah, yeah okay." Dean's hand was gone, his friend turning to the cupboards to grab some snacks. Tears sprang up in his eyes but he managed to wipe them away and cover his sniffling with a cough before heading upstairs. He didn't see Dean turn to look at the vacant space where he'd stood, nor did he see the look of regret on the taller boy's face.
The situation finally came to a head two weekends later. The three of them were set to spend the first few weeks of summer vacation at his house working the farmer's market during the weekdays and mostly staying out of trouble during the weekends. Graduation had been bittersweet. He was glad to be out of high school, to be looking forward to having his entire life set out in front of him and he knew pretty much everyone else was the same way. The graduation party for Dean, Cas and himself was held at the farm, his father and uncle Balthazar cleaning out one of the unused barns and decorating with Mary and John's help. Cas' parents were off somewhere on business, but that didn't really surprise anyone. His uncle Michael showed up, though and overall it was great.
For a while he even forgot about having deeply painful, unrequited love with the other honorees of the party. Right up until he went to the barn after the festivities were long over and heard them talking in the hay loft.
"Dean, he knows, that's why he's been so withdrawn and depressed lately." Samandriel froze in place and just listened.
"I know, Cas, all right? I just..." Dean's voice trailed off and he sighed, heavy steps thumping across the wood as he paced. Samandriel could just picture him running a hand up his face and into his shaggy brown hair. "I'll take care of it."
Samandriel tried to keep calm, to not run up there and confront them both. The only thing going through his mind was that Dean was going to sit him down and talk to him, tell him that he and Cas didn't need him anymore and didn't want him around.
"What do you mean?" Cas' steps caused dirt and stray pieces of hay to fall from between the boards of the loft, grit settling on his shoulders and head where he stood.
"Do you trust me?" Dean was giving Cas the same earnest tone Samandriel had heard not even two weeks prior.
"Of course I trust you, Dean, I love you." Samandriel closed his eyes and took a deep breath, tears wetting his cheeks as he eaves dropped on them for the umpteenth time.
"I love you, too. Just don't worry all right? I'll fix it." Samandriel took slow steps out of the barn, trying not to hit any creaking boards as he exited. Once outside he ran to the edge of the pasture, watching his father and Cas' uncle guide the horses back into the stables for the night. He felt hollow again, hopeless. Whatever Dean had planned he would just go along with it, enjoying the remaining time he would have with them. He was an adult, he could deal with it.
The next night Dean and Cas were in his room watching netflix, Dean was trying to explain the intricacies of Captain Kirk and Spock's relationship between the regular universe and the savage universe featured in the episode but neither he nor Castiel were really listening. Cas rolled his eyes fondly and Samandriel just sat there quietly, barely-there smile on his face as he just tried to enjoy the moment. If this was the last time the three of them would share something like this, he wanted to remember it fondly.
When the episode ended Dean made a show of yawning. "We should probably hit the sack. Kinda wanna be up in the morning."
Cas' head whipped around so fast Samandriel thought he heard something crack. "Why do you want to be up early on a Sunday?"
Samandriel peered around Cas' shoulders and raised one blond eyebrow. Dean looked at both of them and shrugged a little too casually. "No reason." Cas looked back to him, dark blue eyes incredulous and Samandriel shrugged in response. "Okay, fine, I wanted to make breakfast. Damn. Last time I try to do something nice for the two of you." Dean huffed and stood up, Cas chuckling as he did the same.
Dean had yet to sit him down and talk to him, so he was hopeful that maybe he'd just been pessimistic before. "Only if you make French toast." His voice was small and when Dean heard it he looked surprised before a wide grin lifted his features.
"Yeah, definitely." He sent a quick look to Cas that Samandriel was unable to interpret, stripping his shirt off followed by his pants. Left only in his boxers he bent over and rooted around his duffel for his pajama bottoms. A flash of red caught Samandriel's attention and before he could help it he was staring at Castiel as he did the same.
They turned back to him expectantly and it was only then that he was aware that he should have been getting ready for bed. He cleared his throat awkwardly and took his shirt off, throwing it into the hamper next to his door before stepping over a book bag to his dresser to grab his own nightclothes. On the other side of the room Dean was emptying his duffel with a fair amount of force, grunting and growling in frustration. Behind him he heard Cas shuffle across the carpet. "What's wrong?"
"Did we pack our sleeping bags?"
Cas went back to his overnight bag and rifled through it, groaning miserably after a few seconds. "I thought we did, but it would seem that we forgot." Cas slumped over onto the floor, sitting cross legged with his head in one hand.
Dean clicked his tongue before clapping his hands and rubbing them together. "All right, tell you what. We can probably all fit on Alfie's bed, right?"
Samandriel looked between them and then to the bed, it would be a tight fit with the way Dean tended to sleep, but it was doable. "We should be able to. It is a queen sized mattress."
Dean smiled and nodded. "Okay, so, Cas you up against the wall, me in the middle and Alfie on the outside? That work?"
Everyone agreed and they climbed in one after another. At first it was a little awkward, but Castiel made a Brokeback Farmhouse joke and everything settled as they laughed. It was difficult to get to sleep, Dean was warm at his back and it would have been so easy to just roll over and grab onto him. To pretend that he was asleep and didn't know what he was doing. Instead he just breathed deeply and willed his hard on to go away, his heart to stop jack hammering. When he finally fell asleep it was to the sound of Dean humming something softly, probably to Castiel.
It was still dark when he woke up, he didn't know what time it was but he could feel the mattress being jostled next to him. Then he heard it, the soft gasp and rustle of fabric. Were they really doing things in his bed with him asleep right next to them? He stayed perfectly still, listening as Cas panted and whimpered. He couldn't decide between feeling angry, heart broken or violated. A rough tremor shook the mattress as Cas grunted and finally finished.
Dean's voice was a low murmur. "There we go, Angel."
Samandriel was about to turn over and confront them when he heard it. "Samandriel."
His name was softly sighed as Cas hummed and his breathing calmed. Soft noises came after, Dean and Cas kissing, but he was frozen in place. More weight shifted across the mattress before a warm arm came down around his midsection, a large hand splaying against his chest as he was pulled flush to Dean's. His friend's nose nuzzled the skin behind his ear as soft lips pressed into his neck. He gasped and shifted, his ass brushing against Dean's dick. At some point it seemed that Dean and Castiel had disrobed because when their lower halves met Dean was a long, soft wall of heat at his back. He groaned and relaxed, causing the man behind him to chuckle.
"Hey, Baby." He whimpered and pushed his ass back into Dean's cock, unable to resist when it was right there against him. The moan he got in response along with the way his friend pushed back into him made his head swim. "We need you, Baby." Dean's voice was rough, his breath hot against Samandriel's ear.
Suddenly strong arms were wrapped around him and he was flung into the center of the bed on his back. Cas curled into his side, nimble fingers tapping across his collar bone and down his chest until they reached the elastic of his pants. "I... I thought you and Cas." He turned to Dean and even in the dark he could see the wicked smile on those too soft lips.
Dean leaned in and kissed him, tongue nudging his lips curiously. He opened his mouth and their tongues pushed against one another until Dean subdued him and took to exploring and tasting him. Everything around him disappeared, the pain and betrayal he'd felt until just moments ago, the slight chill because of the draft in the window at the foot of his bed, all of it was gone in light of Dean kissing his lips and Cas kissing his neck and jaw. Castiel reached his ear just as his kiss with Dean broke. "We want you, too."
He turned again, short of breath already when Cas brought their lips together, his tongue was less dominating than Dean's had been, but just as insistent. One hand was rubbing up and down his side, warm fingers soothing him. Another traveled down his stomach from the front, Cas this time, and the moment it reached into his boxers he lost track of who was where. The kiss broke and he chased after Cas' mouth as it retreated. "I don't understand."
Cas eased him back until he was laying half on Dean and half on the mattress. The hand on his dick left but before he could complain his pants and boxers were pulled down and off in one smooth motion. Cold air washed over him and made him press back into Dean harder. The comforter was pulled up just as quickly as it had been gone and Cas was back in front of him.
Behind him Dean was gently biting into his neck, soothing over it with his tongue. "Want to mark you, Baby." He moaned and let his head fall to the side and immediately felt Dean latch on, slight sting as the skin of his neck was sucked roughly.
Cas was getting hard again, the head of his cock nudging Samandriel's as they all shifted closer. "Do you want us, Samandriel?"
He whined as Dean let go and kissed the mark he'd just left. Samandriel licked his lips and nodded. "Yes, I do." Castiel kissed him again, free hand drifting down to rub teasingly along both of their dicks. Dean's hand rubbed a straight path down his back and to his ass, curious fingers dipping into his crack. He came back to himself long enough to break the kiss and ask the question that had been on his mind for weeks. "H-Have you two?" He let it trail off, hoping they'd catch his meaning.
Dean's middle finger rubbed his hole gently, not pressing in since there was no lube. He kissed Samandriel's shoulder tenderly before he spoke. "No, didn't want to without you." His sigh of relief made both Dean and Castiel chuckle softly. "So, you want us and we want you..." Dean bit him again as he let the sentence hang.
"I don't just want you once." They'd barely done anything but already he was hooked on the attention, the physical sensations and the affection behind every touch.
Cas' hand slid back up and cupped his jaw gently, thumb rubbing along the ridge of his cheek bone. "Of course not, I don't think Dean or I could stand for only having you once, either."
Behind him Dean continued to bite and lick his neck and shoulder, letting out a soft uh-uh before lightly nipping at the top of his spine. Samandriel shuddered and let his hand come up from the mattress to lie at Cas' hip. "So, how do we... do this?"
Castiel smiled and kissed the tip of his nose, something so warm and intimate it removed any doubts he had itching in the back of his skull. "It's called polyamory. Dean and I were thinking we would just carry on as we always have—"
"Mm, now with a few added bonuses." Cas reached across Samandriel and swatted Dean on the ass for interrupting.
Cas' nose trailed across the skin of his upper arm as it was littered with kisses, slightly cold despite the warmth within the bed. "We could never exclude you in anything, Samandriel. What do you say?"
He rolled his hips back into Dean, then forward into Castiel. "Please."
It was barely more than a breath, but it still cause Dean to growl and wrap an arm around him to manhandle him into another position. Dean rested against the headboard, hissing slightly at the cold as he pulled Samandriel to recline against him. Cas kissed him briefly before slinking down into the covers.
The first touch of Cas' lips to his cock made him want to scream but he bit his lip and dug his nails into Dean's thighs. Large hands covered his, Dean's mouth fitting itself next to his ear. "Fuck you're gonna be a scratcher, aren't you? Gonna make my back fucking bleed when I fuck you, won't you?" Castiel's tongue swirled around the head of his cock while slim fingers gently massaged his balls. He whimpered and barely kept from thrusting into Cas' mouth. "He's good, ain't he Baby?" Dean laughed and kissed his ear, hands still keeping his firmly in place. "I knew you were watchin' us." Samandriel gasped and pulled his hands back, digging his nails in and scratching Dean's thighs. Heat was already building up low in his abdomen, threatening to burst. Dean's muscles trembled slightly as the freckled skin covering them was scratched, another hiss coming from between his lips before he spoke again. "Every time I wished you'd come in and join us."
Samandriel laughed, breathless as Cas pulled back and sucked hard, turning the noise to a low moan. "Dean, I-I think you're confusing reality with... with porn."
Dean chuckled. "I'm not the one gettin' my dick sucked at two in the morning."
Samandriel turned his head until his lips were brushing Dean's. "You could be."
"Oh yeah?" Even in the dark he could see the curious rise of Dean's eyebrow along with the confident smirk.
"Yeah." They smiled to each other and kissed, Dean's hands leaving his to massage his inner thighs. When they broke apart Samandriel moved his hands to Dean's hips, gripping roughly as Cas worked him over and brought him that much closer.
The tips of Dean's fingers were rubbing in the crease of his hips, touch so soft it almost tickled. He spread his legs wide, feet planted on the mattress at either side of Dean's calves. Castiel moaned and let his fingers trail down from Samandriel's balls until they were rubbing around his hole like Dean's had been. That was all it took for him to throw his head back against Dean's shoulder and come with a rough cry, one of Dean's hands flying to his mouth to keep him from waking everyone in the house. Castiel kept sucking him through it, swallowing and rubbing his tongue all over until he was soft and shaking. He put a hand in Cas' hair and yanked him off, soft laughter muffled behind thick fingers.
Dean removed his hand as Castiel climbed up and kissed Samandriel roughly, grabbing his wrist to make sure he didn't untangle his fingers. He tugged on Cas' hair as they kissed, loving the soft moans he got as reward. Teeth nipped his earlobe, Dean's voice overwhelming his sated mind. "I'm such a greedy bastard for keeping the two of you, but I really don't give a shit. Love both of you."
Castiel broke the kiss and put his mouth at Samandriel's other ear. "I love you, Samandriel."
His eyes slipped closed, warmth surrounding him from all sides. It would only be a few seconds before he fell asleep on Dean, but before he slipped away from consciousness he managed the soft confession he'd been carrying around for weeks. "I love you both, too."